6 Signs That Prove Your Ex Is In A Rebound Relationship (And What To Do With Them)

2,944 thoughts on “Signs Your Ex Is In A Rebound Relationship (The Definitive Guide)”

JG

April 23, 2016 at 9:25 am

Hello,

I’m not quite sure if my ex is in a rebound relationship. We had a long-distance relationship of 2 months (we lived like 1 1/2 hours away from each other) He cheated on me with a another woman. He wanted to string us both along, because I found it out myself that he is in a second relationship with the OW. I confronted him and he had to tell the truth – he lied about the story how they met each other. He told me that they are only “talking” and that they are old friends (lie) . They know each other like a week and got into a relationship really really quick. This coward told me that he wrote me less so that I would note that something is wrong – what is also a lie, because we had huge fights and he is a master of the passive-aggressive. 2 days before we broke up, he told me that he needs time and that he lost his way to me, because he can’t quite trust me (Oh, the irony!). He said, that he wants to find the way back to me and that he has feelings for me and that is why, he gives me so many chances to do it right between us. 2 days after the conversation, we broke up and I went immediatly into No-Contact. While we broke up, he gave me the whole blame for the situation. He said things like “If you would have acted like the way we meet at the beginning, I would have gladly have a future with you.” / “She has a past, but she would change/ do everything for me! She is a goodhearted person and doesn’t act like a “slut” in bad times (I never did such a thing and he knows it – he was searching for failures, because he knew he did the most pathetic ones) / “You broke my heart three times and now I broke your heart for the first time!” (Boho, I was at the gym and at the spa – against his will) / “I really like her, so please don’t write her. Let me that kind of hope and be happy for me!” “I was such an idiot and begged him to stay, because I was really heartbroken – I wanted to have a future with him, meet his parents – he was perfect in my eyes, we had a lot in common ( it was insane how much) and we have the ability to have a future! After the broke up I went into No-Contact and stayed really hard on this. I worked out, I lost weight and I treated myself really good, but I was still heartbroken. He acted weird during the No-Contact, he was like in a depression-mode. He posted sad pictures in whatsapp (I only have him there, because I deactivated my facebook-account and he knows it), a huge fight between him and new girl was displayed in whatsapp, so that I could see that they were fighting, but I didn’t reacted to it. After a month and a week he texted me, but I didn’t replied, because I was like mad as hell. I ignored him and the second day he wrote me again, at the third day he wrote again. I answered short and we talked a few sentences with each other. I was polite towards him, but very cold. He doesn’t know that side on me, because I was like a clingy needy girl. He wanted to see me and I told him, that if he wants to see me, that he will come to my hometown. After the conversation I went again into No-Contact. After that, he was like depressed again. The new girl deactivated her second facebook-profile with the “in a relationship” – status and removed on both sites the picture from him and a quote.

My question would be now, is this a rebound-relationship? The other girl is the total opposite of me. She is a easy going, with lacked morals and has a different religion like him and me, she doesn’t have the curves he claimed to love and is really indifferent. She also lives 3 1/2 hours away from him – a lot more miles and hours than me and him- I had with him a lot in common, like the love to medicine (he is soon a doctor and I want to study medicine) and a lot more. They could never get married, they don’t have a future together and he knows it. He once told me, that he “hates” this kind of people. His parents would never accept a girl like her – they would accept me, because we are similiar. They are dating like almost 2 months and they had difficulties like us at the start.

Is this a rebound and when yes, what should I do next? Just stay in No-Contact and be the ungettable Girl?

I thank you so much for reading and answering my comment 🙂

JG

April 27, 2016 at 8:50 am

Hello Amor,

I have thought a lot about it and I want to move on, because I know that I can’t forget it and forgive him. He re-activated his instagram profile and I saw the whole infidelity on display. He doesn’t even kept it as a secret and was wooing over this new girl, while he was in a relationship with me and I was fighting for us. That’s why I want to move on, but I dont know if I should delete his number, blocking him or what should I do? It was really heartbreaking for me, although it was 2 months ago and that he will never change and will always cheat. Should I delete his number or let it unblocked? Because I don’t know what kind of message, it would send when I delete his number now. What should I do?

Thank you for your help 🙂
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 27, 2016 at 9:45 am

DO whatever makes you feel more at peace because whatever his reaction after that won’t matter anymore.
JG

April 23, 2016 at 5:32 pm

Dear Amor,

thank you for your quick answer! I really really want to move on, but I’m still devestated. I don’t show anything to him like sad quotes or something else. I’m always presenting myself happy and healthy, moving on and everything. I just really thought that she would be a rebound, because they are so incompatible. I don’t say it, because of jealousy – I just now his “morals” and his whole behaviour. He can’t have a future with her, because of their religion and roots. He is playing her, because he can get it physical with her and with me he has to wait. I don’t do anything towards him and I won’t do anything, because he have to prove himself that he want it and I really don’t know if I should take him back. I mean, he proved the quote “Once a cheater, always a cheater” – once cheating on me with her and the other one with cheating on her with me. What should I do? Just stay in No-Contact and do nothing?
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 25, 2016 at 10:37 am

you may be right about her beinf a rebound..nope you have to be actively improving yourself during no contact..that’s your way of showing him he made the wrong choice of cheating..
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 23, 2016 at 3:24 pm

Hi Jg,

I’m sorry but it’s not.. rebound is when he is trying to move on and is using another person to do it.. but in your case, you’ve only been together for two months and he cheated and now that they are on the rocks, he’s going back to you.. it’s more like he’s a player.. If I were you, after all he said, you should move on from him.. we don’t know if he misses you because you became a challenge for him or because he thinks he can still get you back with just a litle effort..

if yiu really want him back.. let him work to have your trust again.. coz without it, especially that you’re ldr, it won’t work

Megan

April 23, 2016 at 2:51 am

I was in a relationship with my ex for about 5 months. I broke it off about 2 months ago because he was wanting us to be much more serious than I was looking for. Less than a month later, he was already Facebook Official with another girl (took him 3 months to agree to be FB official with me). They are still together now and are going to Operas together, which was what me and my ex always did together. Is this a rebound relationship? I don’t particularly want to get back together with him, since he is probably still looking for a more serious commitment than I am ready for, but I want to get back in touch, since he was a big part of my life for the time we were together. I’m just unsure about how to proceed. Any advice? Thanks!

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 23, 2016 at 2:41 pm

Hi Megan,

it looks like it is because it’s just less than a month.. make it more natural.. is there going to be an important event in his life soon? Or when he posts something that the two of you can relate too, comment to it..

Anna

April 22, 2016 at 9:45 am

Hi there,
It’s been a long time since my ex and I broke up, I have been using all the tips on how to get an ex back but I am not sure if it’s working…
I did all the No Contact Rule, then started contacting him to the point we went on a date, we even kissed each other and I just found he is going out with another girl for more than 6 months now.
I thought it was a rebound relationship but I am not sure anymore. He told me he is still in love with me but he is also in love with this new girl..and he can not decide between both of us….what can I do?
Please I would appreciate any help because I don’t know what to do anymore.
Thank you so much in advance.
Anna

Anna

April 23, 2016 at 5:32 pm

So I just assume he will not come back and I have lost this battle after so many months?? Do you think that is still any chance for him to come back if I try Contact Zero again? Please I am so lost..
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 25, 2016 at 10:42 am

I think, if you want a chance, you should try no contact but be careful that he won’t make you a rebound again for his new girl now.. treat nc as a restart and if he reaches out, makes sure he’s not playing you because if you want a clean start with him, it should be at a time when he’s single or he really chooses you because he loves you
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 23, 2016 at 10:57 am

Hi Anna,

you managed to make him fall for you again but now you have to decide.. since he already said he can’t make up his mind..either you stay present and wait but give yourself a limit on until whwn you would wait

or

you walk away

Anna

April 22, 2016 at 6:02 am

My situation is somehow complicated. Before he dated me 4 months, he had been through a breakup (his ex gf left him for his close friend). I know it came as a disaster for him. I was there to talk to him every single day until he finally told me he loved me. Our relationship survived 4 months. It ended when he told me he could not get over his ex gf.
But just yesterday, within 1 month after our breakup, I found him dating another girl.
I am so confused. Am I his placeholder? Is his new relationship a rebound?

Anna

April 23, 2016 at 2:21 pm

what about his new relationship? his new gf is also his colleague 🙁
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 23, 2016 at 4:17 pm

we don’t know if she’s rebound but what’s sure is he said he can’t get over his ex when he was still with you..
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 23, 2016 at 10:48 am

Hi Anna,

yeah, I think you becamw his rebound

Jay

April 19, 2016 at 10:20 pm

So, I dated my ex for about a year and three months. When she left I felt nothing, literally. So we stopped talking. A month later something happened between an ex that I dated before her, and I, and we started talking again. We are now in a relationship two months later. My ex decided to show up after finding out, and wants to talk to me, but I’ve decided not to as I am now happy, and I don’t have to worry about walking on egg shells. What do I do to make her see the big picture?

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 21, 2016 at 2:25 pm

Hi Jay,

just tell her the truth in the calmest way you can and be understanding of her.. Let her be angry if she does.. Let her express whatever she feels but be honest that you’re now happy.

Sad

April 19, 2016 at 3:34 am

Hello,
My ex boyfriend and I dated for two years and during that time we had great times but we also faced our good share of problems. Distance and differences eventually convinced him it was doomed to fail so he broke it off. Exactly a month after our breakup he introduced me to his new gf. I am convinced it was a rebound but she is so perfect, probably everything I wish I could have been for him. What does one do when the rebound might actually be better than you and you don’t even have a chance to prove otherwise because of distance?

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 21, 2016 at 9:42 am

start to stop thinking like that… don’t compare yourself in that way because you don’t know her personally..it won’t help if you think she’s better.. besides..they’re still new…. he will still compare her to you.. and he’s still not totally over about that two years in a month..so improve yourself.. post your activities..increase your chances to make him miss you more

Cassie

April 18, 2016 at 5:41 am

My ex of 6 yrs broke up with me because of our past history of arguing fighting. The same day my lesbian partner left me I learned she’s in a relationship with her best friend. On Facebook the best friend was making plans for her birthday and mentioned spending time with my gf at the time. It devastated me to learn this because my ex is out of town right now visiting her family back home. She broke up with me over the phone. We lived together for the whole 6 years. Her belongings is still at my place also. This past week, I tried to do NC it’s hard because I still love her. She texts me everyday saying how much she loves me she’s not over me. She wants us to be able to speak to each other more without arguing. I did the begging telling her I changed. She says she wants to see because she’s trying to believe me. She’s just scared if she comes back it will be the same as before. She told me her love for me is stronger than for her best friend. I just don’t know what to believe anymore from her. Is this best friend a rebound relationship? It’s hard to believe she loves me being in another relationship so quickly. I need advice because I’m so lost and don’t know what to do. Should I do NC or keep our communication open so she knows I’ve changed? Please help.

Cassie

April 18, 2016 at 8:08 pm

How long should I do NC 21 or 30 days?
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 20, 2016 at 8:35 am

Try 21 days, if it’s too short, it’s ok if you want to extend..
Cassie

April 18, 2016 at 6:36 pm

My ex has also been texting and calling me since she’s been with her. Our mutual friend says she’s with her because she feels the best friend is safer bet because she scared to get hurt by me again. Then she’s confused because she doesn’t see her best friend safe either. She doesn’t know if she wants to come back to me or not. The best friend knows how she feels about me and she’s annoyed with the situation at hand. So do my ex want her cake and eat it too? Should I back away do No Contact if her best friend is a rebound relationship? It does hurt to talk to my ex because I love her and want her back. I’m just lost on what to do. I’m scared I don’t keep in contact she will lose feelings for me.
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 18, 2016 at 8:03 pm

I think you should to have a kind of a restart
Cassie

April 18, 2016 at 6:22 pm

That’s what I’m lost about. She’s in a relationship with her right now she been in it since March 29th . She broke up with me then is dating her best friend a day later. Is the best friend a rebound relationship or what? My ex has been away from me for almost 4 months now helping her family back home. The best friend lives back home where she’s at visiting her family. My ex told me she left me because of our constant fighting then she’s dating the best friend a day later. She knows how I feel about her. My ex texts and calls me all the time tells me she loves me she’s not over me. Her best friend of 10 yrs is completely different then me. I never meet her because we live 6 hrs away. My ex have told me about her. I used to ask her did she ever date her she said no she never saw her in that way. I love my ex I do want her back and to come back so we can work on our relationship but I’m just lost on what to do. If I should do No Contact or what? I feel like I lost her anyway because shes back home with her family and friends. She only moved to my area to be with me when we first met.
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 18, 2016 at 2:35 pm

Hi Cassie,

I think she sees her as a grass is greener case.. that would be awkward to stay in touch with her while she’s having fun with her best friend.. that would be unfair to everybody because if she sees you’re better is she just going to leave her for you or if she sees her better than you, and then she will just leave you?

C

April 17, 2016 at 8:05 pm

Hello, my ex boyfriend broke it off with me about 2 and 1/2 months ago after a 4 year relationship. We lived together for 2 1/2 years and were engaged. We started arguing more at the end of our relationship, we both worked opposite shifts and barely saw each other.

We’ve been in extremely limited contact, only when he initiates conversation for the last month mostly because he seems to have jumped into a new relationship within a week of our previous relationship.

He continues to talk to me, says he talks to his new girlfriend about me and compares us. They’ve only been official for a month however he mentioned today that he wants to have our dog over more often if his current long distance girlfriend that he’s never met comes to live with him. There’s not a chance that will happen. I don’t want some stranger to be responsible for my dog. I don’t trust this girl.

Anyway, i’m still quite confused although not quite as emotional as i have been. Can this be classified as a rebound relationship? And if so, i guess i’d like to know if i’m doing the right thing with conversation. I would love to give this another chance, i’m still deeply in love with him. Also, when would be a good time to start using more texts from the texting bible? After his relationship passes the honeymoon phase?

It would be greatly appreciated if you could reply constructively. Thank you and enjoy the rest of your day.

C

April 18, 2016 at 9:41 pm

I feel like i kept limited contact because he started the new relationship pretty soon after our breakup and he would bring up our old relationship, he would want to see our dog, had financial things to take care of. I haven’t initiated conversation in awhile. He’s always initiated and got very angry when i entered into no contact and began ignoring messages.

I guess i’m not sure if i’m going about this the right way. I want to spend the rest of my life with this guy and i feel like a part of him, maybe a part that he’s hiding, still thinks the same about me.
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 21, 2016 at 6:58 am

okay, you need to talk to him that it’s not healthy for you to keep going like this.. it’s very infair.. he’s keeping you at arms’ length while he’s doing what he wants.. his anger is his way of controlling you..don’t allow it.. either you risk losing him..or stay this way if you’re more confortable with it.. but for me, you’ll more likely be friendzoned if you stay in contact
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 18, 2016 at 1:48 pm

Hi C,

why were you in limited no contact? what’s the reason for the talk?

Move on?

April 17, 2016 at 12:24 am

Hey I’d love some opinions on my situation..
So I had been with my boyfriend for 5years and 10months (REALLY long time). Things were getting distant between us around October 2015, then I went on a 3week overseas trip. While I was over there he got really distant, started going out and getting involved with drugs (I’m against drugs). When I got back he was still so distant and cold, he was snapchatting/messaging this girl quite a bit. I was living with him and after he ditched a few dates I had enough, he broke up with me soon after while we were out at a club. The next day we wanted to sort things out, but a week later he was still the same and he bailed on a planned date, so I moved all my stuff out while he was out and didn’t reply to his messages. Eventually we spoke and he broke up with me again officially on Christmas eve. Early Jan he contacted me saying he missed me blah blah but he kissed the girl over new years he had been messaging and snapchatting. I was upset and he was too and said he stuffed up. A few days later he was distant again so I cut him off, did the no contact rule. He began seeing her a lot (I live a few houses down from his and have to drive past it everyday) so I can see her car there. I was moving on really well, then about early late March early April he came into my work wanting to see me and wouldn’t stop glancing over to see me as he left. Then he kept messaging me and confessed he slept with the girl but he regretted it and it was horrible. He said the past two weeks he’d been depressed and just thinking about me blah blah. We tried to make it work, but after a week he was distant again, so I ended it before he had a chance to break my heart again, we were on good terms. Three days later he’s back with that girl, and I was furious. Over that past few weeks he’s been messaging me just random messages about nothing (I’m assuming cause he’s still confused about what he wants) but I don’t reply.
I know he still cares so much about me (6years is a really long time, since we were 14), but he’s hurt me so much. I do love him still, as much as I wish I didn’t. Is she a rebound? I spoke to him numerous times about her and he believes he has feelings he even said the physical part is so much better with me, but he just gets along with her better and he’d rather be with someone that he gets along with better.
He wants to be friends but I flat out say no because I need to move on, and I don’t want to be friends with her around. Due to it being 6 years I know he’ll forever care about me but is the reason his messaging me just because he feels bad or cares? or what? He even said that he reckons he’ll probably come back to me eventually but it’d be too late.
This has been so hard and what should I do from here, the no contact rule still? should I delete him off social media? Is she a rebound?
Sorry it’s so long.

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 18, 2016 at 7:16 am

Hi Move on?

:), I think you should just keep on not talking to him if he’s confused because you would just be friend zoned if he’s still with her.. He has to decide.. He can’t keep going back and forth from the both of you.

vey

April 15, 2016 at 7:18 am

Hi I dated a guy for about two months it was great of course we had hiccups here and there but I still believed he liked me we took things slow but then he broke up with me saying he has personal problems at home and he cant handle a relationship right now I deserve someone better but he also told me we should refrain from being in contact did I mention he had just got out of a long term relationship of 5 years with his ex girlfriend but he dated me 5 months after they broke up do does this mean I was a rebound and is there a possibility of me getting him back?

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 18, 2016 at 2:15 am

Hi Vey,

If he doesn’t want to be in a relationship and also refrains to talk, it’s a slim chance.

Taylorcb

April 11, 2016 at 3:20 pm

So my boyfriend and I broke up March 1st. We got into a stupid argument. The next few days we both wanted to work things out but we were so emotional and kept fighting. Then after 4 days he said he it was probably best we move on. He still cares but he doesn’t think it will work. I found this site. Read upon everything. Tried NC and failed a few times. Now he is seeing a girl. I broke NC after 10 days because I found out about the girl. I brought it up( casually, happy you moved on hope all is well.). He told me he still hasn’t gotten over me, they are just friends and can maybe be labeled as dating but there is no label. Well another fight spiraled out of that convo. I sent him a civil farewell text after. Then he posts a picture of them on Instagram- a quote on the caption how finding love brings out the best in him. Followed by all of these hashtags like #lookingintohereyes #bebetterforher . i am so lost. We were together for almost 10 months, pretty much living with each other. When we first broke up he said he wasn’t going to move on to another girl, he needed to work on himself. About 4 weeks later and it’s like they are madly in love. Is there even a chance? I did all the reading on if he doesn’t have another girl. I bought the texting Bible. I just don’t even know where to go from here. We aren’t friends on social media anymore

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 13, 2016 at 8:09 am

Hi Taylorcb,

actually the more you repeat nc, it looses it’s effect.. but were you active in improving yourself during nc?

Goldie

April 9, 2016 at 6:43 pm

So basically there is no chance. And he is serious..

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 10, 2016 at 8:54 am

He’s still flirty with you but like I said, be careful.. because he might just be like that because he knows you still like him.. It’s better to move on than let him stay and not be sincere

RVob

April 9, 2016 at 4:18 pm

Hi, I want some advice please. I was in a relationship with a girl for almost a year. It was good for about 6.5 months and then it got a bit harder. I never saw her much anymore and we spent a bit less time together. Eventually she broke up with me saying how so much is her fault and how it was killing her knowing she was hurting me so bad. Now we had our problems, but I still love her and I still tried. If she mentioned something that wasn’t working for her, I changed it as soon as I possibly could. Our biggest problem was communication. Anyway, a week after breaking up she started seeing another guy. Now he lives 300 miles away. She had gone away for a long weekend and this happend. When I asked her about what was going on, she denied it, and then the new guy started posting photos of them and saying how in love he is etc.

When she came back, she said we need to talk. Basically she said she loves me, but it is way to painful, and things with the new guy just happened so fast… She told me she wants to be friends and that I won’t lose her since she doesn’t even know how she feels about him or the situation.

So for 2 weeks, the past 2, she had been hiding the ‘relationship’ if you will. When we do cross paths she is her old self, and she is fun and touchy etc In the past week she actually asked me to coffee and told me she was going to give the guy a chance. (FYI He is and old friend…) I told her if she wants me to back disappear, she should say so, but I need her to know I love her and it isn’t going to stop. (Now I need to make it clear that although I have strong feelings, I haven’t begged or pleaded, I have told her how I feel and she has done the same to an extent.) So this week went well, on 2 occasions she mentioned his name, and I just went on as if I hadn’t heard her. On thursday she got hold of me and said; ‘I need to tell you something but I don’t know how you are going to react.’ She told me that Mr is coming for a visit… for the weekend… and he is staying over… I was lost, but tried to keep my cool. Later on I got hold of her and told her I want to just tell her something. She initially said ‘no please don’t’ and I said I would like to. Her phone rang, and it was one of her friends, obviously Mr had arrived and they called her up as she was at work. (We work for the same CO but in different buildings and department. As her phone rang, she actually put it cancelled the call, turned to me and held my hand saying ‘they can wait, you want to talk’

I told her that I had no words earlier and that I actually wanted the world to swallow me, but every time that I thought like that the thoughts changed because I knew I would lose to much. I do love her and she needs to know that. She held me and started saying than you for everything, lastly ending it off with a ‘sorry for this’

Anyway, as of a few hours ago, she is now posting the photos, and saying how in love she is and how much she loves him… I am not well but I am coping. I have already made piece with a great part of this. I have also decide that I want to have her back. This is not an emotional decision, I have really been hitting my head against the wall about this. I know I love her and I know I want her for the long run. The way I have handled this in the past 2 weeks, I believe, proves it. I haven’t, totally -_-, reacted as anyone of her previous bf have, and I know this has hit her hard. She even bought me a few things in the week.

Now, I know that I love her, and I know that I have to be slow and subtle about this, even though I want to scream, especially since she made no public displays up till a few hours ago. Is this a rebound? Should I handle it as such? The end is that I don’t want to spend my life with her. I have made that decision and I have taken the steps to start rebuilding myself. And it has been well received from her side.

Please advise on what you think.

RVob

April 9, 2016 at 4:35 pm

She actually said during our relationship, she hates for people to know what is going on in her life. Now she is posting it everywhere…
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 10, 2016 at 5:53 am

HI Rvob,

Focus on you for now.. The guys looks like a rebound.. so improve yourself and show her that you’re the better choice..
RVob

April 9, 2016 at 4:28 pm

I meant I do want to spend my life with her…

Mike

April 9, 2016 at 3:57 pm

My girlfriend broke up with a week ago while she’s out of town helping her sick family. She feels there’s no hope for relationship because of the constant fighting. I have changed for myself I tried to prove it to her but she says she afraid to take another chance of coming back and things are the same. She’s 6 hours away from me. We been together for 5 years and she already in another relationship. I asked her how can she do that to me. It’s with her best friend someone she never even thought about in that way. She told me she didn’t plan it to happen. She still loves me. It’s confusing. She doesn’t know if she’s coming back. She doesn’t know what’s best for her. She told our mutual friend she only with him because shes not sure or for real I’ve changed and that she doesnt want to get hurt in that way again. Said she feels guilty because she loves me and not sure what she wants. What should I do? Is this new flame of hers which is her best friend a rebound relationship? We do have communication because I want her back but only through texts she rarely calls. Should I do NC rule? I’m scared I will lose her but doesn’t seem she really wants to be with her best friend. So please help I’m lost about how to deal with this situation.

Mike

April 10, 2016 at 12:50 pm

I say it seems she doesn’t want him because she told the mutual friend. She doesn’t know what’s best for her she still loves me. She only with him because she feels I haven’t changed. She doesn’t know if she’s comin back yet. We lived together. She moved to my area to be with me so she’s back home with her family right now which is 6 hours away. She also told our mutual friend this situation is complicated that she’s confused. Says she didn’t plan any of this to happen. My ex doesn’t know I know all this. She texts me at times to see how I’m doing or to have a conversation. But she doesn’t call everyday like she used to since she been with her best friend. She also got in a relationship with him a week after breakin up with me. What should I do? Should I do NC? I love her miss her a lot. Just confused.
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 11, 2016 at 6:25 am

If you can talk to her and tell her that you won’t force her to come back with but you will prove that you’re not like before and then do nc for 30 days, be very active in improving yourself and don’t do jealousy tactics.. but I think you should do a special one, don’t initiate contact and if she does talk to her,engage and then cut it short politely at high point but don’t ever initiate for 30 days. Let her miss you and see that you’re changing.
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 10, 2016 at 5:39 am

Hi Mike,

it depends because if it’s her best friend, she might have developed feelings for him or he sees him as a grass is greener case.. what do you mean that she doesn’t seem to want to be with her best friend?

KYM

April 7, 2016 at 5:45 am

I was with my girlfriend for 5 years. She recently broke up with me April 1st. I found out her best friend of 10 yrs posted in a relationship on March 29th. I didn’t really think nothing of it but I was suspicious because she went to a party with her 3 days b4 but she hide that from. We’ve had problems in past with her bein unfaithful because our relationship wasn’t good. We argued fought a lot. We was taking about working things out. She broke up with me I was surprised. She told me she had sexually thoughts about her friend but nothing happened. I asked her was she the one she was in a relationship with that she posted on Facebook. She said no. I tried to do no contact bein hurt over the break up. She contacted me thru text everyday but I didn’t respond. I caved in spoke with her April 6. We texted all day she kept sayin she doesn’t know what she wants. She wants to believe I changed but it’s hard to that It’s a hard decision between me and her best friend. Then after asking her do she want to be with her repeatedly. She tells me she’s in a relationship with her but loves me and not over me. It broke my heart because I wanted her back to fix our relationship. After we spoke that same night, her new flame posted a pic of them together as her profile pic. I don’t know what to think. Is she a rebound? I’m so confused about this situation. My heart is hurting. If she not over me how can she be in a relationship so quick? Should I do NC as well?

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 9, 2016 at 2:48 am

Hi Kym,

looks like she’s in a grass is greener syndrome.. put your standards on ground.. I know you don’t want lose her but she will not value you if you don’t value yourself.. Risk losing her instead of letting her have both of you.. do nc to heal and to love yourself morea and to reflect

Goldie

April 7, 2016 at 3:03 am

Hello Amor…
How would you know that it’s not a rebound anymore? Reason I ask is because we’ll my daughters father and I have been together for 8 years. We split up a year a 8 months now. He became involved in a new relationship within 3 months. In the beginning I tried my best to win him over. We split due to a fight and not being able.to communicate properly. I gave up on trying to get him back. While he was still with his girlfriend he was being with me. I left him a line and let him have that relationship. He told me to leave him alone and get out of his life so I did. 2 months after he came back wanting to have his family. I gave in but in the end he went back to his girlfriend. Again I left him alone. He contacted my siblings in order to get to me. January we started to talk but he’s been so angry that I just cut him off. Awhile ago he started to fb me again. Saying how much he misses me and wants to be in his life. I took a chance and went out of my way to go and talk to him at his house while his girlfriend was there. I laid out my feelings for him and told him how I felt and that I do want to try a have my family again. He tells me he’s not happy and deep down he still loves me. His relationship is rocky and things art the same. I tell him I do want to work things out but I will not try when your still involved in a relationship with her. She’s the only girl he’s been with since our split. They go on and off. I’m uncertain if this is not a rebound. He told me he needs on things with her before he can give me his 100%. I’m very unsure as to wait to just move on with my life….2

Goldie

April 9, 2016 at 4:59 am

Hey Amor me Goldie again. He’s been with this girl for a year and some what now. Would it still be a rebound or more serious?
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 9, 2016 at 3:11 pm

nope..that’s too long to be a rebound
Goldie

April 7, 2016 at 10:05 pm

“To work on things”
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 9, 2016 at 2:30 am

He may be using her as a back up.. Let him work for you.. he sees he can easily just play with your feelings..If your daughter is experiencing the same thing, how would you advice hee?
Goldie

April 7, 2016 at 3:05 am

I mean to say “we split up a year and 8 months”

faith07

April 4, 2016 at 10:07 pm

My ex bf and I were in relationship for 7 years and we broke up a year and 3 months ago.. He found a new gf after 3 months of our break up and he is still with her. I am not sure if they are in a rebound relationship since they are still together. Do you think they are in rebound? Also, what’s the likelihood of them breaking up (my ex bf and I have been texting, calling and on skype continuously when she’s not around)? He also says that he still loves me and says “I love you” at least once a day.

faith07

April 13, 2016 at 8:22 pm

Hi Amor,

Thanks for your response.. I know its not fair of him to keep me hanging like this while he is not really making an effort to break up with his gf. I will also put across my point the next time I speak to him again. Based on my situation do you think my ex bf is in rebound relationship?
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 14, 2016 at 8:09 am

they’re together for a year now right? Nope, it’s too long to be rebound
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 5, 2016 at 8:23 am

Hi Faith,

I answered your comments in yiur previous posts.. I’ll just paste them here okay?

Hi Faith,

sorry for the late reply.. it looks like he’s being safe.. talk to him calmly.. Tell him that you understand him but you also need to be fair to yourself..If he can’t leave his current gf where would that leave you? Give yourself time until when you would wait but after that move on

REM

April 3, 2016 at 10:42 pm

So my relationship recently just ended with ex February 4th. We were together for a little over a year. Started December 2014. We started talking September 2014 but he was still in love with his ex who was in the army so when she came back in November I was put back in the friend zone. I’ve never told him I love him simply because when we started talking in December I felt I was a rebound for his ex in November and so I simply didn’t take it seriously at least until sometime in March I started seeing he was in it for the long run. We’ve NEVER fought before and to be completely honest he tries much harder than me in the relationship. I just didn’t know if I could trust him. That was until sometime September 14th when he confessed he loved me. Which took me by total surprise! Now I still didn’t tell him how I felt but I know my feelings had grown strong and essentially he was my home and I was his. He did everything a girl could ask for.
Now I recently moved for a new job opportunity for Four month in January 2016. Everything was fine before I left and as soon as the distance kicked in I was working like crazy and admittedly didn’t try to hard to keep in contact. I rarely called and texted him. Then come February I guess he hit his boiling point and came out and asked me why I’ve never told him I loved him? and I simply replied and said that I don’t but It doesn’t mean I wouldn’t in the future I just take my time when I’m investing my feelings into someone. He had had it and ended it right then and there. Me being bitter just agreed and cut him off. After a few weeks I admittedly missing and longing for him. I was a wreck and even flew out there in March to try and pour out my heart to him and get him back only to be rejected. We agreed to just let it go and now hes started a brand new relationship with someone march 31st. He openly puts up everything on social media things between him and his new girlfriend that I never did for him like get him gifts and periodically post pictures of us on social media and be “facebook’ official, etc. I just feel like it’s being thrown in my face on purpose now that he knows i want him back. I feel like I’m going crazy everyday at work and just don’t know what to do. I guess my question is if this relationship look like its going to last or not? I want him back but I’m not sure if I should even be with someone. I understand I was wrong on some parts but he’s playing the victim as if everything was my fault. If it is I would appreciate honesty and can at least accept that but I just don’t feel like it is. I’ll be going back home April 19th also and he is well aware of that.

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 4, 2016 at 8:10 am

Hi Rem,

sorry for the late reply..If you’re not sure if you want to be in a relationship..then it’s better not to be especially if he’s like that..

Jess

March 29, 2016 at 7:08 am

Me and my ex were together 2.5 years.
Engaged.
Live together (still do now. 1 month post-breakup)
Have a son who is one next week.

He randomly dumped me out of the blue.
I have suffered from postnatal depression and he used this as his get out of jail free card and simply told me he doesn’t love me any more. 3 days later is telling a woman from his work how he’s single now and she is gorgeous and all that.
Then has texted her non stop for 3 weeks and they will be going on their first date this weekend.
Meanwhile we’ve been having sex and he’s been telling me there’s a chance we can get back together. And i have to get happier then he’ll consider me again (i know, what an ass)
He then said we could try again. Then broke ot off 24 hours later. Whilst still talking to this girl.
She isn’t gorgeous in mine and many of my friends opinions, which is why I think she’s a rebound. Easy girls make for easy rebounds.
We live together until I can afford him to move out as my son and I are staying here. He sleeps on the floor in ky sons room.
Any advice on what he’s doing and if she seems like a rebound?? Love your site by the way.
Helps me get my thoughts together better.

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 3, 2016 at 5:47 am

Hi Jess,

Yeah, he’s an ass. YOu said your son is just turning one next week? Shouldn’t he be more focused on the child if not you? For me, you should let him be. Let him stay as a father but if he realy wants you back he has to prove that he’s not cheating.

Sunday

March 28, 2016 at 7:34 pm

Me and my ex have been together 14 years and the last year and a half we have been on and off. We have 2 children He has had little flings during this time but nothing serious at all. A month ago he told me he was talking to someone and just yesterday they put in a relationship on facebook. It seems so sudden. Is it a rebound? She lives almost 2 hours away but he sees her on weekends. My heart is broke and i dont understand how he could be serious already after all we have been through. Recently he has been cold and distant , probably the last week or so . But every Sunday when he returns to town he shows up at my house ranting over nothing. Also asks our 12 year old if I’ve had any men there. Help so confused .

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 3, 2016 at 4:55 am

HI Sunday,

That’s probably because he’s still possessive.. Try to build your own life now.. Heal and make a life apart from him before trying to mend your relationship.

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