3,819 thoughts on “Has He Moved On? How To Get Him Back If He Has A Girlfriend”

1. 

   jane

   September 9, 2013 at 6:47 pm

   I have been seeing this guy on and off for about 5 years. We have both done things to each other that have hurt the other person and have a pretty complicated history. First, we got together and he called it off to get back with his ex girlfriend of 3 years. I was upset but moved on…to his best friend (not the best move)…when that ended after a couple of months, he and I started talking again while he was still with the girlfriend. Eventually he broke up with the girlfriend and him and I were together again. The rest involves some unfaithfulness on both accounts; to be honest I think I didn’t treat him well and was never fully committed. Now, he is starting to date a girl that has been around for a couple of years. At first, he was telling me they were nothing serious and he wasn’t with her. I started to see him get more distant and found that he was in fact seeing her (we are in two different cities right now). This made him bring up a lot of things with me – saying that I always made him feel like a backup plan and now that he’s with someone else I am making it hard for him. I’ve texted him and talked to him but I can tell he is different – making me feel like a psycho. He ended up in the same city as me last weekend (his hometown so he was back visiting) and I saw him out and he confessed his love to me and said that we needed to have a serious talk at some point but every time he sees me he really likes me. We ended up kissing but that was it. I talked to him on Saturday after a night of drinking (bad idea) and he proceeded to tell me he was drunk last week and didn’t remember what he had said to me. He was mad I was calling but we argued for 15 minutes and he said he would call me the next day.. which he never did. Now I’m feeling stupid and want to make a clean break, do you think writing a letter is a good idea or do I just seem even more desperate?? Help!!!

1. 

   admin

   September 11, 2013 at 1:21 am

   You would seem really desperate if you write a letter. If I was you I would do the NC rule for a while and then come back to the situation. You need to get out alive and then come back a little better prepared.

2. 

   Nayo

   September 9, 2013 at 3:27 pm

   So my me and my boyfriend witch is now my ex, we went out last Friday and everything was perfectly fine we had a blast and e next day he was like I love you baby and I’m never letting you go. And just this past Friday out of nowhere he broke up with me and apparently theirs a new girl he’s talking too he says he still loves me and cares but that I was just stressing him out too much and that I was being bitchy and stuff, but he says that this new girl reminds him ALOT of me and its just weird how he could throw away almost a whole year in the trash over something stupid ….. I need help !

1. 

   admin

   September 9, 2013 at 7:56 pm

   If he ends up dating her it could be a rebound.

   I think you need to figure out why he broke up with you suddenly.

3. 

   Ruchita Jain

   September 9, 2013 at 2:17 am

   Hi…I was dating my ex past 3.5 years…it was very beautiful n I was sure he was madly in love with me.. during the ladt few months we had fights beacuse I was worried abour his career and also we couldnt give time to each other..one day syddenly he came to ne saying that he is dating a gal pat 3 months and he loves her and now he has no feelings for me..I cried and even begged but he just said sorry..I spoke to his new gf telling him everythg abt us. Knowinh this evn she broke up with hin..but after a week she again accepted him.. the gal proposed him and he feels respected with her.. he w ants me to be friends with him..I tried but after knowing the NCR he kept texting saying he is sorry for hurting me but cant help it..I did not respond at all but thrn he textrd my friend saying he wont contact me againand he is happy with his new lyf..it was his first relationship with me and despite of so many ups and downs he was the one who made oyr relationship work.i was sure he wil never leave me..I dnt knw if it is a rebound relationship..bt I want him back..please help..will NCR work? I guess he has started hating me.. please help..I want him…but dont know how…

1. 

   admin

   September 9, 2013 at 7:46 pm

   Yea, definitely do the NCR right now.

   Still though, if he is engaged it might be time to give up.

2. 

   ruchita

   September 14, 2013 at 10:08 am

   hi…
   Thanks for your advice. I am still in NC with him. But i seem he is happy with his new lyf. He texted me few days before saying sorry and asked me to take care. He is still in contact with my sister. I don’t know if NC is working or no. He seems to enjoy with his new gf. I am shocked how he can forget all that moments with me. Shall I still continue with NC rule??. Its 15 days that he is dating his ex

3. 

   admin

   September 15, 2013 at 1:26 am

   I say keep doing what you are doing.

   Are you evolving?

4. 

   Ruchita Jain

   September 22, 2013 at 12:31 am

   Hii…thank you so much for quick response…I am in NC with him past 20 days…I m evolving till I dny here abt him and his gf..he still tries to contact me through friends…few days before his new gf texted me..indirevtly asking me if I m meeting my ex…i spoke to her casually..please tell ne during the NC should I wish him for his xams abd bithday? This is beacuse…I have to wish my other friends and they give common xams at same place..should I meet his family members as they r very fond of me??

5. 

   admin

   September 22, 2013 at 10:47 pm

   I don’t see any problem with hanging out with his family as long as YOU are ok with it.

6. 

   Ruchita Jain

   September 21, 2013 at 5:37 pm

   Hi…today my ex met my friend.. he told her that he wants friendship with me..we belong to a common friends circle all residing in same area…no body knew abt our relationship..sinxe we broke up..my friends are doubting..they want me to meet him but I denied..so as I said he met my frienf and tld her that he respexlcts me a lot..he also said that his new gf is matured and she knows that he wants friendship wid me..he confessed to her that he is dating a new gal and he is happy..that girl accepted him even after knowing that he ditched nothbof us..he loves her..this is all makibg me totally blocked…is it really rebound..I heard that they still have arguements with each other bt he feels evrything will be normal and it will take time for them to dettle..I m totally confused..if that girl is no nice it is possible to be a rebound?? After he confessing he is happy do i have any hope of getting him back?? Will that girl seriously havr no problem if v r friends and hang out together? I dont know if I will be able to face him..should I break my friends circle? Your suggestions are
   e helping me a lot..should I keep friendship with him? Jusy wanted to tell..wen v broke up he seemed to be little confused. .he once said he wants me..then said no..then finally he decided he wants her..please help

7. 

   admin

   September 21, 2013 at 11:35 pm

   So it sounds like you have some work to do in reigniting his feelings.

   Have you started your NC rule?

8. 

   Ruchita Jain

   September 17, 2013 at 12:03 am

   Yes..it is helping me to develop.he contacted my friends saying he wants friendship with me as we were in same friends circle..on yhe other side his facbook status says he madly loves his new gf..is it possible he is only into friendship with me? Thanks in advance..it is helping me a lot…

9. 

   admin

   September 17, 2013 at 2:00 am

   It is possible but hopefully you can change that dynamic if it is true.

4. 

   lovely

   September 8, 2013 at 11:04 pm

   Hi Chris!
   My situation is very complicated!
   I broke up with my boyfriend a week ago. We dated for 3 months, the first argument we had, when he asked me to live with him. I told him, I can’t not til middle of October. He got upset and told me we will not seeing each other til I am ready to live with him. It got into a big argument, told him ‘We are done”. But in my my mind, I thought we can fixed it. But after 2 days he sent me text saying the he hasn’t get over with his ex-girlfriend and he was sorry of being unfair to me. The following day his ex-girlfriend send me message, saying.. that he wants her back that they still love each other. She wants to talk to me but I ignored her. Deleted their number, blocked them from my facebook.
   Anyway, for that short period of time we were very happy, I believed in my heart we love each other. He was very sweet, romantic. He showed me so much love. Introduced me to his Mom. We never had an argument at all.
   I still have some stuff in my ex-boyfriend place. Should I wait til he contact me,(hoping!) Or should I show up after 30 days to his place and asks my stuff? I am so confused! hurt! I still love him.
   Any input is highly appreciated!
   Thanks!

1. 

   admin

   September 9, 2013 at 7:36 pm

   I think you can break NC to call him and get your stuff. I mean, it is yours so go and get it 🙂

5. 

   Ann

   September 8, 2013 at 10:48 pm

   I was with my ex for nearly 3 years,we had the storybook romance for the first two years, then I had personal dramas and I will say I changed for the negative and it affected our relationship. He left me saying I wasn’t the girl he fell in love with and even though I promised I would get help and sort through my issues (which I have done and it’s great feeling like me again) he told me he didn’t have romantic feelings for anyone and that it would be a long time before he was ready for another relationship. One week later he has a new girlfriend, he says he wasn’t with her while we were together but she was sniffing around him (I had my concerns about her before we finished)and I’m not sure if she is a rebound. He moved to the opposite end of the country for a fresh start and I tried my own rebound relationship, which failed painfully. I emailed him after 3 months of NC apologising for my behaviour during the break-up and that I understood his feelings in the relationship and the break up much more clearly after experiencing it for myself. 2 weeks after I sent the email he called me, he had kept my number and we apologised at the same time and caught up, which was wonderful. He even said he had a better time on the trip to Italy with me, in our rocky period, than his trip to Paris with his new girlfriend, he even admitted things weren’t perfect with her, and he was feeling insecure in their relationship. I reassured him and told him he shouldn’t worry and that the new girl was just tired and that was why she was distant. As he hung up he said he wouldn’t tell her as he knew she wouldn’t like it, I was quite reasonable and said that I wouldn’t blame the girl, I could understand her feelings. My ex said he would get back in touch when he found a way around the girlfriend issue. I haven’t heard from him since then and I wonder did I ruin my chances at a reconciliation with that email, or me reassuring his fears about his current relationship? What should I do next??

1. 

   admin

   September 9, 2013 at 7:31 pm

   Yea, if you wanted him back I wouldn’t have reassured him like that. I mean, you don’t want to cause a breakup between him and his new girlfriend but you sure as heck don’t want to comfort him when he is having doubts about her. Doubts that could cause him to break things off with her.

   Good news is he looks at your relationship as happier than with her.

   What should you do next. Be patient. Just be really patient.

6. 

   Scarlet

   September 8, 2013 at 6:15 pm

   I was with my ex boyfriend for 5 years and lived together for 2. We essentially broke up because he had to move a thousand miles away for a job and I couldn’t afford to go with him. We were trying LDR but then he got a rebound pretty quickly. I was devastated and I was going to go NC but he got all anxious and didn’t want me to leave his life so I remained his friend because I didn’t want him to leave mine either. I still wanted my second chance to get back together.

   Fast forward, I think it was a mistake by not going NC in the beginning because I think that made the rebound more solid and he moved back with her in tow, without even knowing her a full year. I don’t know how to win him back even though I’ve already made improvements to my life while still being in contact. He’s got both of us but I’m not getting what I want.

   He’s never ignored me, he’s always been there whenever I needed him, he is my friend and I know he cares in some way but if I do NC now, is it even going to have any effect? Is he even going to feel the loss or just cling to her even more?

1. 

   admin

   September 9, 2013 at 7:10 pm

   Hmm…. I think NC is still a good idea but moreso for your own good and not his.

7. 

   Julie

   September 8, 2013 at 5:51 pm

   My ex and I broke up in 2011 but I can’t stop thinking about him and he still asks about me I get on with family so well and I found out hes expecting a child he’s not happy in his relationship so I’ve heard and is only staying with her for the sake of the child, should I expect to make amends in a couple months or should I just move on and let him get on with it even though it isn’t easy at all as his family are my only support system?

1. 

   admin

   September 9, 2013 at 7:09 pm

   Hi Julie,

   When was the last time you actually spoke to your ex?

8. 

   Sabrina

   September 7, 2013 at 9:19 pm

   Heres my story…my ex and i dated for four months but before that we dated another three…i broke up with him recently because i wasn’t feeling “the spark” anymore but the real reason was because i thought i was moving and i thought if i told him that he would be sad and heart broken because we did love each other…i thought it would be easier this way. Sadly, now i found out it was my choice if i want to leave or not. So when i found that out *three weeks after the break up* i went to go and tell him. But didnt know how to tell him. I was talking to him pretty much everyday and he was just giving me nuetral responses. I wanted to know what his provlem was. Then i found out yesterday that he is with this new girl. She isnt very pretty and im not being self centered its just what other people have told me. This tore me apart inside and now i dont know what to do. I still love him but its all so confusing. Do you think he may still have feelings for me?

1. 

   admin

   September 8, 2013 at 12:35 am

   Do you think the new girl is a rebound?

2. 

   Sabrina

   September 8, 2013 at 1:16 am

   I hope

9. 

   Danielle

   September 6, 2013 at 11:31 pm

   here’s my story.. My ex and i had been together for a year and 5 months, but had been dating a year before we made it official. i thought everything was okay until he suddenly broke up with me for this girl at his work last Monday. This caught me by complete surprise. It’s only been a week since I’ve been using the NC rule.

1. 

   admin

   September 7, 2013 at 2:14 am

   Keep doing the NC rule.

10. 

    makayla

    September 6, 2013 at 4:08 pm

    Hi. I want my ex back… we where together for a few weeks. He says that he WAS in love with me.. i made the biggest mistake breaking up with him.. we havent talked in 4-5 monthes n hes been with his current gf for that long. We startedtalkkng again a few days ago n he brought something that we used to do together before his new gf.. n asked if i eanted to hang out n do it again. I didnt know what to say so i told him that ill think about it. He knows that i miss him. He knows i envy the relationship.. im very nice to him n his gf n it hurts so much… i dont know what to do. I just want him back… i improved physically but emotionally i have gotten worse because of depression n he knows that. Hes trying to help me n i dont understand why.. he has a new gf but all i want to know is; is there a slim chance he still has feelings for me n if so… how do i get him back? I miss him so much…

1. 

   admin

   September 7, 2013 at 1:55 am

   Well, when was the last time you actually talked to him?

11. 

    Veera

    September 6, 2013 at 2:36 pm

    I´m wondering what makes man send neutral responses to texts? I have send 3, 1st no answer, and 2nd and 3rd neutral answers. Now im waiting 2 weeks to send 4th. But why neutral? is it indifference?

1. 

   admin

   September 7, 2013 at 1:49 am

   They could be busy, they could be angry or they could just not be in the mood to talk. Usually though a neutral response means they aren’t going to be engaged in a conversation with you.

12. 

    Dede

    September 6, 2013 at 1:21 am

    Here’s my story. Its a bit complicated. My ex and I have been broken up for 5 months. He’s been with the new girl for 4 months. I’m positive she’s a rebound. I cant do the no contact because we have a 2 year old together. Were together for about 4 years. I dated someone else briefly. This is the 2nd time we’ve broken up by the way. I ended it both times because he is lazy when it comes to relationships and I got tired of trying to keep it together alone. Bottom line, I lost it when I saw the new girl sleeping in the bed I shared with him for 4 years. I broke down and told him how I’d been lying to myself about not wanting him anymore, which is true I was lying to myself. So now he knows how I feel and I honestly just want my family back. We’ve talked about getting back together but decided to take it one day at a time. But he won’t dump the new girl yet. I’m impatient in this situation. Please help !

1. 

   admin

   September 6, 2013 at 2:39 am

   Have you read my E-Book?

   Also, have you seen my page on rebound relationships?

13. 

    Lillian

    September 5, 2013 at 10:23 pm

    Why would he test me if he doesnt think we would last in the long run? That’s exactly what he told me over a week ago. I guess i’m just really confused by what he’s told me about not seeing us together in the future but a couple of months ago he saw us never leaving eachother’s side and then a week after this incident he tries to talk to me? It makes no sense, but I am going to continue to not talk to him and live my life without him, I think that’s best and I think what we have now is just toxic. He’s got his head in the clouds and i’m down here on Earth. I dont know what’s gotten into him.

1. 

   Lillian

   September 6, 2013 at 9:09 pm

   haha that’s funny 🙂 well thanks for replying to my comments, I appreciate it.

2. 

   admin

   September 7, 2013 at 2:03 am

   No problem. If you need anything else don’t be a stranger.

3. 

   admin

   September 6, 2013 at 2:35 am

   Haha hey I didn’t say all guys were smart.

14. 

    mar

    September 5, 2013 at 12:44 pm

    hiya just wanted to say i tryd the nc rule and within two weeks my ex textd me sayin hi and then another text sayin bye and i broke it i wasnt thinkn and replyed wat do you want mike? he said well i was guna give u another chance but u said that and then i stupidly said iv no feellings for you nymore so bye in he texted fine im gone but previous to this i had a message of his new girlfriend who he had stared dateing 2 weeks after we broke up after are 2 year relationship saying can u plz stop texting my boyfriend please thanks i responed by saying i havnt contacted your boyfriend in ages you can have him any ways wat do i do is there any point of waiting for him r do you thimk im wasteing my time and can u recomend any books r nything lol thank you so much for your advice your head must be fryd lol thank u really appreciated!!

1. 

   admin

   September 6, 2013 at 2:12 am

   Yea I recommend Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO haha.

15. 

    Makena

    September 4, 2013 at 9:25 pm

    My ex Alex and I dated until my birth day week in February and we dated on valentines day and my birth day it had been a month since we started dateing and then I broke up with him so he could date another girl named Lacey because his friends would not stop bothering us about I and that’s why I did it and now there dating and I want him back its gonna be there year anniversary soon and I miss him and still love him but it seems impossible to split them up now.

1. 

   admin

   September 5, 2013 at 12:42 am

   Have you started your NC yet.

   Also, the E-Book might be god for you.

16. 

    Kelly

    September 4, 2013 at 7:05 pm

    I’m in situation 3, my bf of 2 years cheated and left me for the other girl. He had been distant our last 2 months together but I never would of guessed he was cheating. He goes away on the weekends and she lives there and so she was his weekend gf. When I found out I wrote her a letter. She messaged me and said she thought she was his only gf and that shes supposed to be moving in with him in a couple weeks. She said when she confronted him he told her that him and me were never anything but friends with benefits and that he hasn’t talked to me in weeks, but really I had just been with him a few days before. I had some proof that I told her about but I think she chose to believe him, and that they are still together. I haven’t talked with him about this; I just got angry right away and sent her that letter. In the letter I wrote that I didn’t want him anymore. He read it so I wonder if he lied to her because he knew I was done. Also I posted something online letting people know I broke up with my cheating bf. I’ve never been the type of person to let my anger get the best of me but I’ve never been this hurt in my life and at the time I was done. 3 weeks later I took it down and sent him a text apologizing but didn’t get a response. He’s blocked me from facebook and now I’m wondering if she had him block my number and maybe he never even got my text. He’s probably afraid to talk to me since I contacted the other girl. I know it sounds dumb to want him back but I’ve thought about this a lot. I’ve never loved someone this much before. Oh and I wasn’t a crazy gf, I was totally cool about everything, I just handled this one thing badly. Is my situation hopeless?

1. 

   admin

   September 5, 2013 at 12:41 am

   What is your reasoning for wanting him back?

2. 

   Kelly

   September 5, 2013 at 12:29 pm

   Thank you for responding to me, it really means a lot! At first I was really angry but then I started realizing things I’ve done that maybe could have caused him to lose interest. I haven’t gained weight (he has lol but i don’t care) but he has brought up a few times that i don’t dress up anymore and it’s killing the spark. and he wanted me to make more money so we can have the life we want (but the girl he’s with now just works at a gas station). The last 2 years were the best of my life. I have a ton of fun with him. I used to go away with him on the weekends I didn’t have to work. But lately he’d say he wanted to take his brother and I was fine with it. Didn’t know he really had a girl there. And sorry if tmi, but we’re really compatible in bed, I won’t go into details lol. He cheated but he did a lot of sweet things too before she came into the picture. I tried to move on but I can’t imagine myself with anyone else. He used to have a temper and yell if something was bugging him. His new year resolution was to end that and he hasn’t yelled since, so that’s good I guess. But at least then we’d talk about stuff and makeup. Now he just keeps it bottled up and I never know if we’re good or if somethings bugging him. If I can get our relationship back but with better communication I think we’d be really good.

3. 

   admin

   September 6, 2013 at 2:11 am

   Hey, I think you are thinking the right way. Putting yourself in his perspective.

   For now I would recommend a NC Rule where you focus on yourself for a little bit.

4. 

   Kelly

   September 15, 2013 at 10:35 pm

   Hi Chris,
   I sent that text to him apologizing 2 weeks ago. He never responded, but he did unblock me from facebook; which kinda surprised me. And he hasn’t posted anything new. But on his new gf’s page she changed her town to ours, which means she just moved in with him about a week ago. Should I go ahead and send what you suggest for a first text? Or do you think it’s too soon with her just moving in? Also I want him to know I’m starting school in 2 weeks, since the reason for the break up was that he was trying to get me to go to school for 2 years. But if he doesn’t reply or replies neutral I don’t know how to bring it up without sounding desperate.

5. 

   admin

   September 16, 2013 at 5:20 am

   What do you think is the least threatening timing? I would go with the timing that wouldn’t be as controversial for him.

17. 

    Sara

    September 4, 2013 at 5:44 pm

    Hi I NEED help!! Okay so, I lost my virginity to a guy and he broke up with me because my sister had an argument with him… Then 3 days after he had a girlfriend. His first kiss with her was 2 days after they had been going out and it was infront of me! I went away for a couple of days and my best friend was with our friendship group (my ex is in our group) and she told me that he had been ignoring his new girlfriend for the whole day. The next day they were fine. It’s been about 2 weeks now since we broke up and he has been ignoring me and having a go at me (petty things eg: you took his seat so don’t complain) But yesterday he started being my friend again and he was having a normal conversation with me. I don’t know what is even going on. I don’t know where we went wrong because 3 days before we broke up it was my birthday and he bought me flowers and a card saying that he loves me loads and loads. Help please 🙁

1. 

   admin

   September 5, 2013 at 12:35 am

   What did your sister say to him?

18. 

    Lillian

    September 4, 2013 at 4:15 pm

    So, Sunday was a complete week with no contact and just as I thought, he came back and texted me a picture of my favorite drink around 1 am last night. He’s notorious for coming back within 2 weeks. Whats with sending me a picture of my favorite drink though? weird. I know he’s still hanging out with his new chick so why does he bother me when I try to forget about him?

1. 

   admin

   September 5, 2013 at 12:33 am

   He is testing to see if you respond.

19. 

    reneemarie1169

    September 4, 2013 at 6:02 am

    Not me. I am happy that the guy I dated has a new gf, and I wished him the best. I am happy with whom I with, and my ex made me appreciate the guy I have even more. It does make me feel good that his new gf is heavy. heheehe

1. 

   admin

   September 5, 2013 at 12:08 am

   Hahah well good for you!

20. 

    Chuck

    September 4, 2013 at 4:15 am

    My on again off again boyfriend of 8 years has been seeing someone for about 8 months… I don’t know if they are officially together.. He’s been overseas that whole time pretty much but communicating with her very frequently. We have spoken a bit and he came back for about 2 weeks and i saw him then and i just know he still loves me.. but he feels like he’s ruined our chances for us and theres no hope for repair. I think he’s trying to really move on. but i do not want him to. i’ve tried dating other people.. we are in a bit of contact and he has said he would like to see me. and this weekend we will hopefully catch up. I just don’t know how to go about this anymore. I know i should be happy and friendly and what not. But i just feel like he’s so stubborn about how damaged we are and he doesn’t want to live with resentment. What can i do? I need help! I get so overwhelmed. He makes me feel alive.. and i just wish he felt the same. I don’t know how without him thinking i always have an agenda.. im so confused

1. 

   admin

   September 5, 2013 at 12:07 am

   So, I am a little confused. He is he overseas or the new girl?

   It seems like you do have a bit of an advantage since you were with this person for 8 years.

   When was the last time you contacted him?