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206 thoughts on “9 Reasons For Why An Ex Will Text You After A Breakup”

  1. Avatar


    May 2, 2019 at 11:19 pm

    Can I please have a private email or does everything have to be posted. I have a very confusing situation in the no contact zone. I would like to know if I can get private advice.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      May 3, 2019 at 5:37 pm

      Hi Helen….probably best then to go to the bottom of any post and click on the “Contact” link and your message will go to my support email.

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    April 29, 2019 at 10:02 am

    Me and my x bf we are break up a month ago. He leaves me without talked anything. He blocked me from social media. 6 days after he has blocked me I tried to text him but he say all done and he said that he really hates me and I’m very confused what I have done so he hates me. He leaves me but why he blames me. I was thinking maybe he lies to me but makes this situation like I made him angry because of my fault. 2 weeks after he blocked me I saw he unblock me but he didn’t text me anything and I pretend I didn’t know he unblocks me.
    Last Friday this month He texts me and I reply to him but I said that I didn’t save his number and I asked him who are you, and why you text me but he answers me I’m X and nothing. I’m very confused he texts me but he didn’t want to tell anything so after that I say Ok Good Night. 7 minute after he also says goodnight to me he text me back and say we can talk sometime if you want. And I reply to him no I’m Ok and I don’t have something to say. And he reply to me again if you have something we can. So I was thinking why he texts me like that after he blocked for so long and text me like I can’t move on and want to text with him. I was very angry and tell him no reason to text you again. And after that he Gone until today. I just want to know why he texts me like that like push me to talk with him

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    April 25, 2019 at 8:25 pm

    My ex and I broke up 2 weeks ago and she posting her new boyfriend on social media but the problem is that she always text me day by day but not opening a topic and she also put her new relationship on social media so wat does that means I’m lost???

  4. Avatar

    C'est la vie

    April 17, 2019 at 6:26 pm

    My bf of 5 yrs broke up with me out of the blue through text. He went away for college up state. Weird part was just when I was going on vacation he texted me that he wanted a break? He kept saying hurtful things like you disappoint me, you don’t have motivation, and criticizing me about everything. It seems like he had to break up with me right now because he either has a new gf or was in a process of starting a new relationship. After 5 yrs, I would have thought he would have more class to break up with me in person when he came home from school instead of texting it. After a few months after he broke up with me. He saw some pictures of me and texted me that I’m disrespectful for posting pictures of me hanging out with my friends. And how after 5 yrs of being together I would act like I don’t care? Yet, he’s the one who broke up with me over text? I responded to that text and he went psycho, telling me that he is over me and wants nothing to do with me. After 3 months of not hearing from him. He sends me a text saying that he knows I hate him, but he wanted to see how I was doing? I did not respond. I just felt it was a narcissistic act and I am over being hurt and feeling like I was the one who made him break up with me.

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    April 3, 2019 at 7:47 am

    Hey Chris,

    My ex and I were on an LDR for 3 months. We were crazy for each other, but like all couples we often had a few misunderstandings that made things a bit off at times. Despite that, we used to talk everyday and put a lot of effort into our relationship. We also made plans to see each other in the summer and bought airplane tickets.
    Two to three weeks ago, he broke up with me because he felt like he wasn’t in the right physical and mental place in his life to be in an ldr nor any relationship for that matter, that he has no energy to fight for this and doesn’t want to hurt me more later so he prefers to do it now. The day after he came back and took it all back, apologized and said he would never leave again, but then a week later he broke up for good with the same reasons.
    He’s in the navy, so he is quite busy and i do understand it in a way but i also don’t understand how can someone be so selfish for only be thinking for himself right now. I told him i wanted to try to remind us why we started in the first place and all he could say is that right now he does not want a relationship, and does not want to give me hope either that when things settle down he will. Told me he wants me to be happy and move on with my life, and if we meant to be, we will find our way back… in the meantime asked me to be his friend because he wants me to keep contact and be close to me since he values talking to me.
    What should i do? We clearly want different things, and i am afraid if i stay as his friend that i am giving myself hope, that he will come back, and if he doesn’t? On the other hand, i also adore him and i want him in my life…
    Any thoughts?

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    March 8, 2019 at 6:44 pm

    Hello Chris and EBR Team. First I want to thank you for so many resources to access about how to get back with exes. They really help me a lot. I appreciate it. 🙂

    So here’s my problem: Me and my ex broke up a month ago but we kept talking and I felt that he wasn’t sure about the breakup. He said he had the curiosity of knowing what other people could offer. Which I think is GIGS and I didn’t take it well. I told him that is not a valid reason, that you want to see other people? What the hell? So I just started NC for a week. But he just texted me that he’s bothered by me being bothered by the reason he broke up with me. He sent me some websites to explain the reason, about how normal it is for some people to want to date other people and stuff like that. What does he mean and what should I do now?

    Thank you so much for answering my questions!

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      March 8, 2019 at 10:41 pm

      I agree Rachel….he seems selfishly engaged in wanting to play the field. I would stick with NC. His foolishness will eventually dawn on him despite his justifications for his actions. Pick up my Program “Pro” if you have not already so you are well equipped to deal with it all.

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    Ana Paula

    February 26, 2019 at 7:41 am

    My ex and I broke up about 2 weeks ago because we both went away to college and didnt have much time to see each other then. A few days ago, he replied to my story and told me not to drink, it was something he always used to tell me as a joke when we were together (I am not an alcoholic). Then, he pulled an inside joke and I ignored it. He told me he had to study and said goodbye in a very affectionate way, but without saying I love you or sending any hearts. I replied with a simple bye. What does this mean?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      February 26, 2019 at 10:36 pm

      Hi Anna..it seems like he is slowly trying to find a way to connect. Think baby steps. Best not to rush into anything, but explore whether this renewed communication can get some traction for what you both want.

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    January 28, 2019 at 7:23 am

    Hi. I broke up with my ex out of seeking validation and attention and I’ve done it numerous times. This time he’s had enough. So he turned the table on me. I finally admitted my mistakes. Then You know the drill, texting, fighting back and forth. Says he needs a break. Ok. I leave him alone. Then he texts me then we do the vicious cycle again and again. I get mad because I don’t hear what I want. So then I’ll ignore him. Whenever i ignore him he texts me again. Then the cycle again. Anyway, I was the last one to text him “good morning” he ignored me, a message before that I said “anyway text me when you’ve calmed down” he finally responded after three days and of course the day I started the no contact rule! He text “how are you doing” Do I respond? How should I respond?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      January 28, 2019 at 11:36 pm

      Hi Kyra! So I think NC will help you in many ways. Be sure to do it the way I teach it in my Program! And No, don’t respond to his casual inquiries about how you are doing.

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    January 7, 2019 at 3:29 pm

    My ex broke up with me 2 days ago after a 4 year relationship. He says we are incompatible in the long term and will always make each other unhappy. I asked if we can have space and try again and he said he doesn’t think it’ll work. He still wants to be friends and comes over to see me and hugs/kisses me. He still texts me. Reading this, his texts are likely out of guilt. Can I get him back if he’s only texting me out of guilt? And do you think I should go no contact?

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    December 25, 2018 at 4:27 am

    My ex and I broke up about 1.5 weeks ago and the break ups have happened so many times in the past. This time he told me he can’t stand me and doesn’t even like me. However, he has tried to contact me and I only responded to an important question in regards to his job. Then his daughter found out I was going to church so they came to church. I was shocked to see him and his kids to the point of me almost having a panic attack. I put my head down, didn’t look at him or say a word and walked away and left. I cried in the car because he was the man I have loved since I first met him 2.5 years ago. I later received a text message from him saying it was nice to see me today. I responded with thanks. Christmas Eve morning he sent me a message asking if I stayed at one of his friends houses. The reason I would stay at an ex friend of his house is because I took a job 1.5 hours away from my home and kids to be closer to him and to plan our future. Two of my children are in college and one is a freshman. I drive back home when I have her so no, I’m not abandoning her. But I have done so much for this ex of mine. I feel he has played mind games with me for so long. If there is something like my kids event or something he doesn’t want go with me he seems to end our relationship. Tell me to come get my shit. I have worked at this job up by him for about 8 months now and it has been a complete struggle as he has kicked me out st least 8 times. I don’t know many people in the area really so I have been driving back and forth 1.5 hours each way to work. I can not afford this so I’m planning on staying with an ex friend of his that is strictly friend based and always would be. He has let me stay at his house multiple times with my ex kicked me out of his home after s night out and I wasn’t able to drive all the way home. Anyways, my ex says he would love more than anything for us to work this out but it’s impossible. He continues with his negative excuses. After our conversation today, it has messed up my head and I can’t get him out of it. He obviously doesn’t want to be with me so he needs to stop contacting me. Why does he not stop? Should I start the no contact again. He is the type of guy to get super pissed if he is not responded to. I asked him to only contact me if he wants to work it out….what the heck is wrong with me…why would I want to be with someone that doesn’t even like me, blames me for everything, calls me names, kicks me out of his home and I guess I annoy him also. Ugh please, what should I do to clean my mind of him? I love him with all of my heart and have prayed daily for his return to me but obviously that’s not working.
    Thank you

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      December 25, 2018 at 11:42 pm

      Hi there…there is a great deal of things going on here and many questions you have asked. I am limited here in what I can offer to you so my best advice is go pick up my epic long eBook, EBR PRO. Its 485 pages long and lays out blueprint of what you can do to better your chances.

  11. Avatar


    December 24, 2018 at 8:53 am


    I broke up recently.all this happen sudden.so much anger and fight.he said I don’t want any realtionship with you and get very angry but later we talk not much but little then one day he angry on very small thing with me it’s just my voice is audible during call that’s it and he gets angry with me you are not hearing my voice not getting it what can I do i said I will never call you.take care then nor he text me and I am not calling him.he used to anwer my call whenever I call him after our fight then again he used to get normal after few days but tell me what to do now.

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      December 24, 2018 at 10:29 pm

      Hi Nee!

      Breakups can happen fast and anger is often the trigger. Perhaps brief cooling offer period will help, the try to restart communications, followed by a casual meetup. If he continues to be fussy and uncooperative, then consider the No Contact Principle

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    December 12, 2018 at 9:07 pm


    My ex and I broke up spring of 2017 after dating for about 6 months. I completed the No Contact Rule and actually waited for over 60 days to reach back out. We got together that summer and nothing really came of it and I know he dated a couple of girls after we went our separate ways. Fast forward to the end of the summer 2018, when we started texting here and there and ended up going out a few times but they always ended up back at his place, which I know I shouldn’t have let happen. Well, I made the mistake of going over there one night without us going out beforehand and for the most part, ever since then, I only receive the booty call texts. Majority of the time, I tell him that I’m not available but there have been a couple of times that I’ve given in. It’s not that I don’t want to go over there because of course, I would enjoy the company too but I want more and truthfully, I would love to have that with him. I’ve looked into several different resources for advice but cannot seem to find anything that fits my situation. I would be ever so grateful for any and all advice of how I could possibly turn this around?!???

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      December 13, 2018 at 12:34 am

      Hi Sass!

      That’s a tough one isn’t it. You want more. He seems content with the status quo. Its not cycling in a healthy way for you as you want something real and mature, with a future. So perhaps take a big step back and give him more time and space. But briefly explain to him why you are pulling back so the cards on clearly on the table. Then going forward focus on being the best “you”, gaining whatever healing is necessary.

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    December 5, 2018 at 7:13 pm

    My Exboyfriend is going through a tough time. I’m pretty sure he has depression. Due to this he reached out constantly saying he is so angry our relationship ended like it did and that he misses me so much. However when I try and help him through this tough time he lets me in and then closes off again by saying something like… I don’t think getting back together is a good idea. I’m not even bringing that stuff up either because I am focusing on myself right now!

    Should I help him through this quarter life crisis or do I need to take a step back. I am worried if I take a step back everything will start getting easier for him and he’ll be able to forget me or find someone else to fill the void.


    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      December 6, 2018 at 3:05 am

      Yes, I think pulling back is the right medicine. Give him a heads up that you are needing to focus on your recovery and being a better “you”. My comprehensive ebook, “The No Contact Rule Book” is filled with information that can help you!

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    November 13, 2018 at 12:13 pm

    Hi, please help me. i’m not good with english. My ex broke up with me cause he lost his feelings for me. But he doesn’t want to lose our friendship and asked if i can still be by his side since he’s not used not having me around. I told him we should cut our communication and gone nc. but he still greets me good morning everyday. I think he’s just guilty and lonely since he’s a seaman. I still want him but i dont wanna lose myself completely. if i hold on i will be hurt that’s why he said to just let him go

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    October 14, 2018 at 4:06 am

    It’s been almost 3 days since we broke up. We’ve been together for technically 3 years. He wanted to break up with me because he thought we aren’t compatible. He did the same thing before, but I was stubborn and kept messaging him saying “good night/morning” and reminded him to eat.

    Right now, he was the one that sent me “good night” or “remember to eat!” messages. What should I do? Should I respond to him with thumb emoji or..?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      October 14, 2018 at 9:40 pm

      Hi Bae….I know things feel recent and raw. Tell him you are taking some time to reflect and heal from the breakup. Go pick up my eBook so your are armed with the best information on what to do to get back together and how you can stay together. My home page has lots of resources that should benefit you.

    2. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      October 14, 2018 at 9:40 pm

      Hi Bae….I know things feel recent and raw. Tell him you are taking some time to reflect and heal from the breakup. Go pick up my eBook so your are armed with the best information on what to do to get back together and how you can stay together. My home page has lots of resources that should benefit you.

  16. Avatar

    yvette garza

    September 19, 2018 at 5:44 pm

    I and my ex-bf did not talk for a long time then he talk to me and said he wanted to get back it was out the blue I could not even say yes cuz we had not been talking. and now his being cold towards me for no reason. I’m so confused like why would you tell me you want to get back and then become cold aging

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      September 20, 2018 at 12:56 am

      H Yvette!

      So your ex is hot and cold. So don’t tolerate that. Employ NC in the way I describe in my program.

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    September 10, 2018 at 12:05 pm

    Hi. I just broke up a week ago. My ex and I, we had been together only for 3 months . The next day after broke up he texted me with prayers . I didn’t reply. The day after, he texted me some job vacancies advertisement but didn’t prolong the conversation.
    After a week, he texted me again saying he wanted to know if I am getting to know someone for marriage, will I be doing some background check and how. Then he went missing again.
    3 days later he texted me again and ask me whether my instant messenger account still available because he couldnt see it (I removed him from friend list). What does that mean and why is he acting like that

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      September 11, 2018 at 12:50 am

      HI Savannah!

      So it may be he is having second thoughts about whether he acted properly by breaking up with you because he sure i reaching out a lot.

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    September 9, 2018 at 3:06 pm

    My ex bf broke up with me a year ago. I think he has a gf now. But he still send me random texts like links to items which I would buy (because I was looking for the items when we were together). What does this mean?

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      September 9, 2018 at 6:43 pm

      Hi Den!

      So perhaps he does have another gf or maybe its casual…so don’t focus on that. His behavior suggest he is trying to make a connection. So practice what I call the “mirroring” tactic. Reciprocate and send him some links to things he is interested in and see if the contact from his side ramps up. And if your really want him back, tap into one of my books so you give yourself the best chance.

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    August 26, 2018 at 5:37 am

    Hello…sorry for my english im not good in english as well. Anyway, my problem is my ex broke me by text msg…after several weeks with no contact,i texted him saying i miss him so much no response at all,but when i say i want to see him.he texted me and asking when. What does it mean? We had already physical attachment

    1. Chris Seiter

      Chris Seiter

      August 27, 2018 at 4:00 am

      Hi Admhel…him breaking up with you by text is so classless. I thing it would be wise for you to implement no contact and make use of an ex recovery plan such as my program. Go visit my website and check out my ebooks, tools, resources, and all the rest to help you throughout this process.

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    May 14, 2018 at 5:11 pm

    I fell head over heels for him and initiated 2 dates that turned into sex. He never contacted me after that so, 2 weeks later, when I saw him at an event, I just treated him as regular friend. On Day 24 of NC, he messages me to ask “why I was acting cold at that event and if he did something wrong”. He adds up “he’s just seeking peace and no issues with whoever”. I guess he feels guilty? How can I handle the situation?

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