Exactly How To Use Text Messages To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back

2,742 thoughts on “How To Use Text Messages To Get Your Ex Back”

Ashley Hawkins

March 26, 2014 at 5:12 pm

Hi. My boyfriend and I were together for a year and 5 months. I was the longest relationship he’s ever been in and we were like best friends. I cheated on him 8 months before we broke up with an ex and I admitted that to him. He was really hurt and broke up with me. I miss him so much and it’s been 3 months now since the break up. I can’t go a day without thinking about him. I really want him back. What should I do?

admin

March 27, 2014 at 11:03 pm

Why did you cheat on him? What was your reasoning?

Fiona

March 22, 2014 at 8:26 pm

Its been 6 months since my bf broke up with me. We had been meeting up until 3 weeks ago he wanted to do no contact but now I really miss him. He says hes moved on but I know he hasn’t with the way he wont look at me and when he does I can see it in his eyes. Is it too late to try this?

admin

March 23, 2014 at 4:51 pm

No not too late but try reading the entirety of this site before you do anything.

Alyssa

March 20, 2014 at 8:48 pm

My boyfriend and I were together for about 9 months. We broke up a couple of days ago. We were really in love… I still am but he told me that I need to move on and we shouldn’t talk.
He broke up with me. What happened was, he moved across the country for me, and he is about 5 years older than I am (I’m 21, he just turned 26). Also he comes from a different culture than I do so sometimes this made things difficult because all of my family is American, and his is middle eastern, and he is used to being with foregin girls, who have different morals that I do. I have lied to him and broken his trust over and over, about stupid things and he told me I’m disloyal and he doesn’t want to be with me anymore and he thinks I’m not who he thought I was. Our fighting was really bad, and he has issues with anger which caused him to scream at me and call me horrible names. But I know he only did it because I hurt him and he loved me so much. He threw away his life for me and I didn’t appreciate him or change or grow up as much as I should have.
I was wondering if there is any way to salvage this or any hope of getting back together. We tried to talk it out right when we broke up, but we just ended up fighting and he told me he can’t trust me and there is nothing I can do and to move on. But he also told me he will always love me and that if I could have been mature enough to handle our relationship we would have gotten married.
I know that he isn’t going to go running to someone else because he isn’t that type of person. And I also know that he still loves me, I just have hurt him so much and we have put each other through a lot.
What should I do? He’s the only person I want.

admin

March 21, 2014 at 4:57 pm

The culture thing hurt you. But he needs to be more understanding that you are not some foreign girl…

There is a way it can work but you know what. Getting past his cultural beliefs is something that may be very challenging.

Lizzy

March 18, 2014 at 7:52 pm

My ex unexpectedly texted me yesterday after over 3 months of NC. It was to just tell me that he was changing the cell plan next month. We had a shared plan that he continued to pay for even after the contract ended. I asked him why he put off changing it for so long and he said he just didn’t want to take that out from underneath me. I waited to respond for a few hours, thinking about what to say, not making it seem like I was so available, and knowing I needed to end the conversation. So I responded with telling him I would have been fine and would have accepted the decision either way. That he didn’t have to keep me on it but appreciated it. Thanked him for letting me know, ended the conversation and wished him a good evening. He immediately responded with a ‘you too.’ This surprised me because I wasn’t expecting such a quick response.

Should I take this opportunity to text him again soon? Is this the door opening to communication again? It’s surely a curious situation..
R

March 18, 2014 at 5:43 am

Hi Chris,

I was dating a guy for 5 months and while we didn’t see each other every single week he kept in contact with me on a very regular basis. We got along well but I at times felt he was holding quite a bit back and keeping me at an arms length.

I thought we had started to make some progress as the when he asked me to stay over one weekend. As soon as it seemed we had gotten to a fork in the road where the nature of the relationship was likely to get serious he did a complete backflip and broke up with me a few days later saying he had thought about it extensively and had doubts about ‘us’ and didn’t see a future.

I was shocked and hurt but managed to keep my composure and accepted his decision and ended the phone conversation. Obviously my first reaction was to cut contact, delete all texts and communication. Exactly a week later he texts me to ask how I am and what my work address is because he wanted to send me something. Today I get chocolate in the mail that we had spoke about previously, with a post-it note saying ‘this is what I was talking about, hope you enjoy it’.

I’m so confused….is he feeling guilty and trying to make himself feel better? Is it stupid to send him a text saying thanks that I received it and wish him well? Is he expecting us to stay friends.
rachel

March 17, 2014 at 12:11 pm

my ex boyfriend he left me because the other girl and he is not txting me..i want him back ilove him very much pls help me..
Lisa

March 15, 2014 at 9:27 pm

So I followed the no contact rule and after 30 days I sent him a text, he texted me back and was into the Convo. He was actually texting more then I was… At the end of the text he said out of no where “I would like to be friends with you, if that’s okay with you, and maybe see eachother sometime” I said ya maybe… And that was it. What does that even mean?

Amber

March 19, 2014 at 1:00 pm

now all of a sudden he went out on 1 date and all of a sudden he is in a relationship with this 35 year old looking stripper who has a 9 year old kid that the DSS took away because all this girl did was party… now they’re saying I love you to eachother and its only been 3 days… is this a rebound relationship? what is this chris please help!
lisa

March 19, 2014 at 1:01 pm

i have no idea why the first comment says lisa then this one says amber… thats weird.
Lisa

March 16, 2014 at 3:00 pm

Afterwards he kept texting me seeing what I was up to but I left my phone at home when I went out… So I wasn’t texting back… He said I miss you… Then he asked to meet up soon… I said ya maybe. Then he kept texting me asking me how my day was…

Ana

March 12, 2014 at 11:34 pm

Hi Chris, I have adamantly been reading your website since my breakup and successfully completed my 30 day no contact period. Today, I texted my ex using a “good memory” suggestion from your article. He has yet to text me back, and he did not contact me during the 30 day no contact period. How many days should I wait before texting him again? By the way, thank you for this website. It has been extremely helpful.
Sarah

March 12, 2014 at 5:34 am

My bf and I of about 10 months broke up recently (his idea). He is 20 and has worked since high school and has only invest money in cars, and I am 23 masters graduate and have traveled overseas and want to continue, we both felt the strain of being at different stages of our lives. Ive texted him twice about

a.( Day 2 of break up) asking why he blocked me on facebook (his reply is that he feels we dont need to be fb friends- ..I assume he doesnt want friendship and needs space)
b. (Day 3 of break up) I had a dream where he died and I text him in he morning asking if he was okay and I had a bad dream about his family. He replied just before he started work saying “everything is okay, thanks for caring, try and get some sleep and have a good day”

I want to apply the no contact rule from now on as I honestly have no reason to contact him. Although it is my birthday within the next two weeks and he was previously invited to it. Would this rule still apply or is it okay to text him to see if he will attend? I understand if he wanted to come and see me..he would remember and text me about coming or not….. We otherwise have unfinished business (we have purchased some tickets to a couple events in the future including a party cruise and some dance classes, and I have some items at his house including a pair of heels and some clothes.)

I don’t want a relationship with him as I agree to why we broke up; we dont have a solid future together. The break up was no surprise, but I do care about him and would like some communication/friendship with him.

Im not heart broken but I am sad about loosing a good person in my life….
HELP!

March 9, 2014 at 10:43 pm

Ok so my first contact text after NC was the “I have a confession to make”. He replied and I did what u suggested, to wait an hour before I responded. Except I didnt because he actually called me! I was NOT prepared for that. But it wasnt all bad as he ended up telling me he was happy to hear from me and that it felt good to hear my voice, after a small chat we hung up. The next day I sent him a memory text and he responded very positively, I engaged in a small convo and it was very good and positive so I decided to end the convo first and told him I had to go cus I was going out with a friend. He texted me a while after asking me who I went out with and when I told him a new guy friend he acted a little aloof but immediately after went on a rampage saying how I could do that so soon after our break up and that it felt like I had betrayed him. Long story short, he had never sent me so many long messages before. The next day he was still mad at me and admited it was for that same reason and decided we should not talk anymore and to leave him be for a while saying he was very disappointed in me. What do I make of this? I feel like im back to step one. How long should I NC him before I try again?

HELP!

March 19, 2014 at 4:22 pm

Hi Chris! Would reallt appreciate it if you give me insight. I dont think a week of NC after this would be enough as I already did that and he insists he doesnt want to talk. How badly did I mess up?
Janet

March 13, 2014 at 9:55 pm

Hey, when you told him “I have a confession to make” what was the confession you ended up giving? I want to you this line with my ex .. I just don’t have a confession besides missing him
HELP!

March 17, 2014 at 11:53 pm

I wasnt very prepared lol so I told him I had thought about him for the first time in a while and it had made me smile.

Angie

March 9, 2014 at 2:32 am

Hi chris i wonder why mi boyfriend toll me hi love me ,hi cry and after brokeup with me,hi toll me if you call me i promese i answer you call ,but i call him but hi ignore my call ,we been togheder for 8 years .thank chris
Louis

March 6, 2014 at 5:17 pm

Hi Chris,

This is the first article I’ve read that’s written by you and I’m loving it so far. Here’s my story: I’ve been with this guy for 4 years 2 months, we were happy, we just got back from a Paris getaway last January before he had to leave back to our home country… Everything was fine and we were madly in love. At the airport, a few days after we came back from Paris before he departed, he cried as much as I did, making me promise that I wouldn’t replace him and I wouldn’t find another guy while I’m still in the UK. Last month in February on the 9th, that was the day he last texted me saying “I love you, I really do”. And then he disappeared. He stopped contacting me, he blocked my number so I can’t text or call him. So I’ve been in touch with his mum asking her what’s going on and she’s been helpful because she really loves me… She told me that she has asked him several times if we were still together but he isn’t giving her any straight answers. On the 4th of March, which was 2 days ago on my birthday, he deleted all our pictures from his Instagram and unfollowed me as well as block me on Whatsapp so I won’t be able to reach him there. Today, the 6th of March, he blocked my number on his mum’s phone (I know because her last seen stamp on my Whatsapp disappeared so I used my best friend’s phone and saved her number and her last seen appeared) so I won’t be able to contact her anymore… However, he did unblock me on Whatsapp though. Also today, he blocked my Instagram. I’m so heart broken and I’m shattered into pieces. I’ve loved this guy like I’ve never loved anyone before. We had plans to get married, so I’ve built my hopes around him. We have common goals, we had the same vision for our future… I didn’t know what was going on so I texted his brother today as well asking him if he was done with me and he said said its obvious that he is. I’m writing to you now to ask if you think I have a shot at getting him back (after the 30 day no contact period) considering he completely blocked me out of his life?

admin

March 7, 2014 at 6:44 am

Really?

To be honest I don’t like this article very much. I think it’s one of my worst.

Do yourself a favor and invest in all the other articles on this site. Every question, fear, etc, etc you have will be answered. I promise.

Phana

March 6, 2014 at 8:30 am

Hi i find it really hard doing the no contact thing as i work with him. How will this help me ? what startegiesdo you have in this instance?

admin

March 7, 2014 at 6:35 am

Limited contact is what you are going to have to do since you work with him.

Jennifer

February 28, 2014 at 12:43 pm

Hi,

Thanks for your amazing tips. I’m in a predicament. I’ve been with my boyfriend for 2.5 years, and things were going pretty well. He lives about 5 hours away. In the last 2 months, he took a step back because he has been studying for the bar exam…so I gave him that space and I let him initiate all contact with me. However, in the last few weeks, things were going so well. He came down to visit me and stayed for 4 days, went back home, and then 2 days later he came down again to surprise me for Valentines Day. A few days after that, though, I caught him lieing to me about where he was going. To make a long story short, he had once given me his password for his Apple ID on his iPhone, and I was able to use it to login to the Find My iPhone App to check his location one day when I was worried sick that he wasn’t replying to my calls/texts all day. When he called me 6 hours later, he told me he had been home studying all day and his phone was in the other room. However, the iphone app showed he was in a different location. This caused a red flag in my mind and so I continued to check his location and realized that for an entire week, he was lieing to me about being at home and studying for the bar exam, when he was really out and about (with who I assume are his guy buddies that he sees regularly). The last straw was when I called him from work one night during that week at midnight needing something, and he didn’t pick up, so when I logged in to the app, it showed he was at a buddy’s house. He came home later and left me a voicemail at 2:30 AM acting like he just ‘woke up from sleep and had fallen asleep on the couch.’ I was pissed that he would lie about small things and go as far as to fabricate a story to me! The next day I called him out on his b.s. over the phone and I basically made it clear to him that I knew his exact whereabouts. I never told him how I knew, so after I hung up the phone, he never contacted me that day at all until he must have figured out that I was logging in with his password into the Find My Iphone App. That night, I went on a last minute trip to Las Vegas with my girlfriends for my friend’s birthday. He called me the next day and I picked up only to tell him that I couldn’t speak right now bc I was in Vegas with my girlfriends. He was really taken aback and told me to have fun, and I wished him luck on his studying. I never heard from him again. I know that his bar exam just ended today. Should I expect to hear from him soon? And if so, should I continue the No Contact Rule that I’ve been enforcing ever since the last time we spoke?
Danata

February 28, 2014 at 1:21 am

Hi, guess I really want to talk to you. So about 7 months ago me and my ex broke up because I cheated and told him I did it because I needed a reason for him to dump me. We have slightly talked throughout the 7 months BUT recently he has be coming to see me. Turns out he’s seeing someone and wanted to see me because he wants “something familiar”. Basically he said he has had a hard time moving on. I told him I refuse to have any sexual relations with him if he is with someone, his response “I made him like this”. It’s hard to continue everyday wanting him but I do it… It’s even harder because when I see him he throws himself at me and in the back of my mind I get desperate and think hey I’ll be the side chic … But honestly we’re perfect together and I need all of him. He’s kinda seeing someone he says…WHAT DO I DO? I have been taking it beyond slow hence the 7months. HOW DO I COMPETE! I have done everything in your blog except be social… I’ll try this maybe that’s just what I’m missing huh?
Ps. I use to be really bitchy and impatient…. I’ve worked on these things since we split … Help I Love him he’s a great guy. I just use to really suck. How do I prove I have grown.
Ps. We were together for 3 years

admin

February 28, 2014 at 10:46 pm

Have you read my latest guide?

Ccs

February 25, 2014 at 10:10 am

Hi Chris,
My boyfriend told me last week he fell out of love… We had been together for 3 years and a half. He didn’t change at all or anything, so for me it was all a big surprise, unfortunately.
I haven’t messages him at all, even though as you said, I want to text and call him all the time.
What should I do? I am heartbroken, and I really would like some more advice ..
Regards
Gwen

February 24, 2014 at 7:39 pm

Hi Chris,

I have been reading mostly everything on here ( even all the comments) and i already did the NC rule for more than 30 days now. Well to get to the situation first… me and my bf were dating for 6 months and we had a long distance relationship (we saw eachother 2 weeks every month). We always got along really well, had the same mindset and even when we had little fights, we always were like it never happened a few hours later. After 5 months when i last visited him and everything was still fine, he still told me he loves me and showed me that he loves me, when i left and went back home he started ignoring me all of a sudden….after around 2-3 weeks i made a terrible mistake, just to see if he cares, i told him a lie ( i said some dude whos in love with me since 2 years was with me at a party , when he wasnt there) because i wanted to find out if he still cares….of course he got really mad at me after he found out and ignored me for about 3 days and then came back to me saying he would forgive me this once….after that it got into an up and down. At one day hed ignore me on other days we would talk like nothing ever happened. At one point when i felt really frustrated i asked him if we could talk and without even letting me say anything he said – i cant take it anymore, the feelings are gone- im a really emotionl person so i cried and begged for him back (i know i shouldnt have done that now) he said he still cares though and he still wants to be friends and for us to talk casually like friends do. Two days later he offered me to be his sex friend. I declined telling him if he wants to have sex he has to take the whoe package not just my body. After that he stopped talking to me. And i heard of the no contact rule so i didnt message him either or anything.At first he still send me a few links of funny things without saying anything to it. But after awhile he stopped messaging me completly.3 days ago I send him a casual message like you said to do after the NC rule. He replied with a one word answer and again never texted me or anything…

Im not sure what i should do now…The NC rule was so hard to pull off and now it doesnt seem to work at all…it breaks my heart over and over again seeing him online or have our friends we both share talk about him. I still act happy and if i wouldnt care at all. Not letting them know i still miss him like crazy and would do anything to get him back and be able to spend more time with him and feel that lovely feeling he used to gave me. My hopes are fading away and i am not sure if its even possible for me to get him back at all.

So i hoped mabe you could give me some advice on what to do.

admin

February 25, 2014 at 6:39 pm

Have you read my latest guide too?>
Gwen

February 25, 2014 at 9:16 pm

You mean version 2.0? yes i read it and i also read the LDR guide.

Bellai

February 24, 2014 at 1:32 pm

Hi Chris,it actually was the one who kind of let go of things between me and my guy because he was going to be busy with his full time job and starting college. Told me he’d see me less like twice every once or two weeks. So I made a decision and told him its better we stopped it as much as I love you I want you to completely focus on job and especially school…he then asked again and said he’d still be Able to see me 1 or twice and I told him the same thing though its hard for me but I wanted what’s best for him.Anyhow we did contact for a week, so I basically the first to text him after a week. The thing is he did not reply,since last night,I am not sure why..he probably doesn’t want to do anything with me anymore? Please tell me what I did wrong. Thanks Chris

Reply
Bellai

February 24, 2014 at 1:30 pm

Hi Chris,it actually was the one who kind of let go of things between me and my guy because he was going to be busy with his full time job and starting college. Told me he’d see me less like twice every once or two weeks. So I made a decision and told him its better we stopped it as much as I love you I want you to completely focus on job and especially school…he then asked again and said he’d still be Able to see me 1 or twice and I told him the same thing though its hard for me but I wanted what’s best for him.Anyhow we did contact for a week, so I basically the first to text him after a week. The thing is he did not reply,since last night,I am not sure why..he probably doesn’t want to do anything with me anymore? Please tell me what I did wrong. Thanks Chris
Thalya

February 24, 2014 at 3:35 am

Hi Chris,

So I have done the NC rule for a little more than 30 days now. Hasn’t been easy of course but he never contact me during. Just yesterday my grandmother passed away and I posted it on my FB. I still have him as a friend so he saw it and texted me how sorry he was for my loss and if theres anything I need, to let him know. I texted him back saying thank you and just to keep her in prayers, thats all I ask (since I don’t want to sound too out there) and he texted me back saying he will. I texted him back saying my family and I appreciated his words and he texted back. Don’t want to make this long for you Chris…so we texted like 2 or three more till he stop texting me. I haven’t heard since then. I’ve been tempted to contact him but I don’t want to mess it up or him ignoring me. I know it doesn’t hurt to try but I am scared. I see he has been snapchatting a certain girl he works with and makes me think if he has moved on…what should I do Chris? I’ve read enough of your blogs but now am questioning myself.

admin

February 24, 2014 at 6:44 pm

Am I the only one who hates snapchat?

I seriously hate that thing.

Don’t worry about him snapchatting some girl. She could just be a friend.

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2,742 thoughts on “How To Use Text Messages To Get Your Ex Back”