393 thoughts on “Legitimate Reasons You Should Get Back Together With Your Ex Boyfriend”

  1. Avatar

    Keisha

    August 28, 2013 at 3:38 pm

    Your three good reasons for getting back together w/an ex so fits the man that I was just entering into a relationship with. The only problem is after he and I spent only four and a half hours together, he decides we were not going to work. Said it was because I didnt like sex. In my eyes, it wasnt because I didnt like sex, I just didnt want to be use for a slip and slide on our first-time being together. So I put a halt on everything. Now, he’s in a relationship w/his sex buddy. Which, in my opinion again this is where he really wanted to be in the first place. Said that it wasnt, but I left him in heat (are grown mature aged men still going around saying that?) Anyway, since ive been reading your articles I have thoroughly enjoyed the advice. Because, a lot of it is talking about my situation w/him. Enjoy your day.

    1. admin

      admin

      August 29, 2013 at 3:54 am

      Thanks Keisha, it is nice to have someone just compliment you every once in a while.

  2. Avatar

    Ashley

    August 27, 2013 at 9:45 pm

    Hi so I dated my ex boyfriend for about two years. Last year before a made the switch to college as a freshmen I broke up with him because he repeatedly said that he didn’t think long distance would work. I regretted breaking up with him and he took it really hard even though i thought that was what he wanted. We talked everyday for the past year while i was in my freshman year of college. During this time we were kind of friends with benefits. However during xmas break last year i found out he had slept with two other girls. I told him that i couldnt talk to him anymore because i was just so upset. That only lasted for about 2 weeks. Once we started talking again i told him if it ever happened again i would not be able to come back to him like i did this time. This summer we slipped back into the friends with benefits zone again and i found out a week ago, he had slept with another girl in the middle of the summer. I blocked him on all social media but he showed up at my house bawling a few days ago and now all i want is to be with him. I have wanted to date him for the past year but he wasnt ready, he told me. He now says he is ready and i want to date him again. Am i letting him walk all over me? Is it okay for me to get back together with him? What should i do?

    1. admin

      admin

      August 28, 2013 at 4:17 am

      I think that is a decision you need to come to for yourself.

      However, you might want to just try dating him for a month to see how it goes.

  3. Avatar

    southerngirl

    August 26, 2013 at 10:16 pm

    My ex bf broke up with me almost 2 years ago. He has kept contact with me, not much but this last contact was a month ago. He told me he was fine and that he has been real busy with work. And that he is back in town where I live. I know I hurt him so bad but I am still in love with him. I just don’t know if this is his way of opening up communication with me?

    1. admin

      admin

      August 27, 2013 at 4:20 am

      My gut tells me that it is his way of opening up.

  4. Avatar

    Sophia

    August 26, 2013 at 7:07 pm

    My boyfriend and I broke up about a week and a half ago. We were together for 10 months. It was a mutual ending and we got some closure a few days later. He said that he felt like we were “stuck”. We stopped pushing each other to be better people and that everything in our relationship essentially stayed the same. I completely agree.
    He is very unhappy with how things in his life are right now, and we basically said, that we really need to get our “stuff” together.

    He said he hadn’t been fully in it for a couple of months (when we started being “stuck”), but tried to work it out on his own. I felt the same way and considered breaking up with him for the same reason. However, we had a really good thing before we stopped moving forward. I truly think we were holding each other back, but don’t know if that is something that we can work on together when we’re maybe in a different headspace. Is this really worth the time and potential pain?

    1. admin

      admin

      August 27, 2013 at 4:09 am

      Only you can determine that. If you decide you want to give this a shot I will do my best to give you the tools to succeed.

      Sorry, your heart has to be in this and if I told you to do it then I would always wonder if you are just doing it because I told you to. I say make your own decision and if you decide it is worth it then I will do my absolutely best to prepare you.

  5. Avatar

    Jane

    August 25, 2013 at 9:16 am

    1. Avatar

      Sophia

      August 28, 2013 at 12:04 am

      I definitely want to get back together with him. I have been reading your guide, and was already planning on not contacting him. Obviously, this just started, so I have a while to go. I’m working on myself (joined a gym) because I know that each of us not bettering ourselves anymore was part of the problem.

      Again, I know we really care about each other, but I’m afraid I’ve made some mistakes already. Can this still help?

    2. admin

      admin

      August 28, 2013 at 4:19 am

      I think so.

  6. Avatar

    Jane

    August 25, 2013 at 9:12 am

    Hi…

    I have broken up with my boyfriend of 3 years about 2 months ago. He was heartbroken when i did it. We didn’t talk after I left as I told him I need a space to think about everything. The reasons why I left started when things got bad at his job. For about year it was a nightmare he was stressed at work and when we had arguments he would shout. Shout to the point that I would be scared. I am mad at myself that i never talk back. However he did find a new job and he is happy. Recently we started talking again but we are both scared. He is scared i am gonna break his heart again and leave. But i am scared that he is not going to change. I have never had long relationship so i don’t know if i am overreacting about the shouting. It only happened few times when he was about to loose his job.otherwise we did have happy relationship… I don’t know what to do. I will never know if he had changed if i don’t go back. I am just so confused. He wants to get back and says he won’t do it again but i don’t know. This was work what is tougher things happen in future? Sorry for going on about it so much. Hope you can advise 🙂

    1. admin

      admin

      August 27, 2013 at 3:08 am

      Have you started your NC rule?

  7. Avatar

    Amy

    August 24, 2013 at 5:01 am

    Hi, my best friend of 4 years who became my boyfriend for 1 and a half years broke up with me almost 2 months ago because he doesn’t love me that way anymore. He still really wants to be friends because he still really cares about me and thinks that I’m a really fun person. He tried to give me closure about a week or 2 ago saying that he can’t see a future with me in that way. We’re both going off to college now and I haven’t talked to him since he said that because I need time to heal. He said and truly believed that he would never break up with me ever while we were together. Around the same time he said he was starting to have doubts would have been around graduation and the beginning of summer. He now lives 45 minutes away. Is there anything I can do to help him maybe fall in love with me again? He had liked me for about 2 years and fell in love with me about 3 years ago.

    1. admin

      admin

      August 25, 2013 at 7:23 pm

      Have you read the really long page on getting your ex boyfriend back?

    2. Avatar

      Amy

      August 26, 2013 at 5:13 am

      Yes I have, I just don’t know how to work talking again into my life with him. He really wants to be friends and he made it really clear that he had no feelings for me that way. He was being really harsh in saying so in order to make me give up hope and get closure because he doesn’t like that he hurt me because he cares about me still. I don’t know how he’ll act if I act the way you suggest because he knows me well. Unfortunately we talked for about a month and a half after the breakup so about two weeks ago no contact started after the harsh closure talk.

    3. admin

      admin

      August 27, 2013 at 3:35 am

      I guess your goal should be to see if you can get him to feel those feelings for you again. It may not happen but what the heck, mine as well go all out and try everything!

    4. Avatar

      Amy

      August 28, 2013 at 5:45 am

      So there’s no reply option for your last comment so I had to reply here. I want him back as a boyfriend but I know the chances are really low for anyone to get an ex back. I just don’t want to trash the potential friendship (which, statistically speaking, is the general case…).

    5. admin

      admin

      August 29, 2013 at 3:37 am

      Yea, I understand where you are coming from.

      However, even with what I preach on this site (IF things don’t work out) you could still be friends.

    6. Avatar

      Amy

      August 27, 2013 at 3:53 am

      See I don’t want him to not like me being so desperate and I’m afraid if I act like that he may not even want to be friends with me anymore… I want to keep him in my life. He’s my best friend and he makes me so unbelievably happy…

    7. admin

      admin

      August 28, 2013 at 3:11 am

      So, you don’t want him back as a boyfriend you just want him back as a boyfriend?

  8. Avatar

    Claire

    August 13, 2013 at 11:48 pm

    Hi, I’m Claire. I broke up with my ex 5 months ago today. I miss him from time to time. We went through our no contact period, even though we messaged eachother about 3 months ago on Facebook but that was it. Not a lot was said until 2 weeks ago when we spoke every single day for about 8 days and then we just stopped. Our relationship was really good. We only fought about his dumb lies here and there. The reason why I broke up with him 5 months ago was because I caught him stealing and I didn’t even ask him why I just dumped him. He explained his reasons 2 weeks ago, but all that did was bring old feelings back and it was like I was hurt and mad all over again so I told him to stop apologizing I once again decided not to talk to him. But now that my head is clear and now that we got closure I feel like I really want him back despite what he did before. He said he was cleaning up his act and trying to become a better person not only for me but for himself. I have a hard time trusting and believing him but I guess we just can’t control certain things and feelings.

    1. admin

      admin

      August 14, 2013 at 3:09 am

      Hi Claire,

      You caught him stealing, oh no.

      Well, what do you think about trying out the NC rule?

  9. Avatar

    Lirio ortiz

    August 10, 2013 at 3:10 am

    I broke up with my boyfriend last year and I still love him. The reason we broke up was because he would believe his friends about they said about me more than he believed me. I’ve tried talking to him but when I try I can’t say anything to him because I get worried about what he’s going to tell me. I know that he still has feelings for me because he admitted it to me. We just don’t know what to do anymore. Please help me.

    1. admin

      admin

      August 11, 2013 at 2:55 am

      Seems your major problem is that your afraid to take a step. But the only way to know for sure is to give it a shot.

  10. Avatar

    Judy

    August 5, 2013 at 3:41 pm

    I broke up with my boyfriend of 2 years ago – two weeks ago during a huge fight. After that I had a breakdown and was diagnosed with Major Depression after losing my job 6 months ago. My depression made things hard on me, and thus on him. He struggled with it, and took the brunt of it. He had a hard time understand why I felt the way I did about myself, and felt like a failure. We had a big fight two months ago and after that he changed and started to withdraw and started working late and not texting me or calling me to tell me he was coming home late, it’s like things just stopped. He also started seeing a therapist. There are other issues outside of me that he was also dealing with but because my depression was making me a selfish SOB I couldn’t see outside of myself and support him. I hurt him a lot, and the guilt I feel is overwhelming. I am getting help and am told that I can go back to being who I was in a little time with some medication and therapy. Our relationship was amazing before I lost my job. We had amazing companionship and I loved him more than I have anyone. He talked about marriage. Two weeks before we broke up he told me he loved me more than anything, and I meant the world to him and he was sorry if he didn’t say it enough. After the breakup we spoke and he was so hurt and angry he told me he didn’t know if we could get back together he needed to focus on himself, he loved me but something changed. He said he needed to take care of himself right now, he doesn’t know anything about the future. He said you hold a place in my heart and always will.

    I know, even before i’m “well” that I want him back for all the right reasons, but will not touch base until I have a good foot hold on my situation and my self. But i’m not sure I can get him back, I know I have really hurt him incredibly and if he still loves me enough to try again.

    1. Avatar

      charmee.. :)

      August 8, 2013 at 7:57 pm

      hi judy, fight for him if you really love him, then work it out!!!

    2. admin

      admin

      August 6, 2013 at 3:23 am

      Hi Judy!

      I am glad you want him back for all the right reasons.

      Is there anything specific I can help you with?

    3. Avatar

      Judy

      August 6, 2013 at 3:26 am

      Yes – what is the best way to let him know I made a mistake and do want him back? Will the No Contact rule here still work?

      Why would he say just throw away my things, and keep going back and forth so much (ie., you mean more to me than anything in this world to, I love you but something has changed, he begged me not to give up, then says he doesn’t know what he wants, not wanting to see me to talk about it saying he’s afraid he’ll want to try again and he can’t right now)

    4. admin

      admin

      August 6, 2013 at 3:56 am

      The NC rule can still work for ya!

      Sorry, I am so busy today I couldn’t get to all your questions.

  11. Avatar

    janjan

    July 23, 2013 at 11:13 pm

    what if they hurt you a lot after things broke it off and you find it hard to trust him…

    1. admin

      admin

      July 24, 2013 at 4:26 am

      I think that, that is up to you on whether or not you should want him back after that point where he said mean things to you. Word of warning though, a lot of things are said that he doesn’t mean right after a breakup because he is usually angry.

    2. Avatar

      kiki

      July 25, 2013 at 12:19 pm

      Why would he be angry when was the who ended it and what about the flip flopping what does that mean?

    3. admin

      admin

      July 26, 2013 at 2:50 am

      It is very possible fore a guy to get angry even if he was the one who broke it off. I am now sure what you meant by the flip flopping though?

    4. Avatar

      kiki

      July 26, 2013 at 6:20 pm

      One min he’s friendly like we would be having a conversation about a movie that one of us saw then like a day or two later if i try to have a casual conversation with him during our exchange he’ll ignore me he’ll go back and forth with this right now he’s back to his cold ignoring self again. Or the other thing he’ll do if i ask a question about our daughter after he replies sometimes I’ll throw a joke in afterwards and then he’ll stop answering

    5. admin

      admin

      July 28, 2013 at 3:58 am

      Then don’t throw any more jokes in for now. AND you may need to let more NC time go by to get some favorable responses.

  12. Avatar

    kiki

    July 22, 2013 at 10:45 am

    We were happy together at least thats what i seen there was somethings that i didn’t like towards the end that led to him cheating it was his drinking and partying constantly with a former female friend that i didn’t like we started arguing more and more after our daughter born because he’d rather party and drink everyweek i still love him and still want to be with him i even still want a future with this man but in the end all he wanted to do was stay for the baby thats what he said before dumping me i guess what im asking is he worth fighting for because one min i say to myself i really love this man i wish he’d come back but then i think about what he has done to me almost this past year and hate his guts any advice?
    P.S. another thing that he does now is be cold and distant most of the time and there has been moments where was nice and we were joking and lauhing then a day later he’ll be back to his cold distant self why is he flip flopping

  13. Avatar

    Sani

    July 21, 2013 at 9:23 pm

    Hi

    My boyfriend of one and a half years recently broke up with me 3 weeks ago because I didn’t trust him. He never gave me a reason not to trust him but because of my childhood, I found it hard to trust him. For the first few weeks I felt okay and that I was able to move past him but after a while I feel like he is my soul mate and that I need him in my life. I have realised my mistakes and I trust him with all my life. I met up with him yesterday for the first time in 3 weeks to catch up and I know that I cannot be friends with him. I kissed him and he told me he likes me but that he just cannot be with me because he needs trust in the relationship. How do I make him understand that I do trust him?

    1. admin

      admin

      July 21, 2013 at 11:28 pm

      Did you say the words “I TRUST YOU” to him? hahaha

    2. Avatar

      Sani

      July 22, 2013 at 12:34 am

      Hahaha not yet. He told me yesterday that I can’t just flip a switch and trust him suddenly. But I believe I have honestly changed. Should I just tell him how I feel and hope that he feels the same way?

    3. admin

      admin

      July 23, 2013 at 2:37 am

      I think you should tell him. However, you need to lead up to it so it’s not out of nowhere.

  14. Avatar

    Diana

    June 22, 2013 at 1:53 am

    Thank you! This was really helpful. 🙂

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