How To Make A Stubborn Ex Boyfriend Come Running Back

183 thoughts on “How to Make a Stubborn Ex Boyfriend Come Running Back”

Sam

January 6, 2020 at 9:03 am

January 3, 2020 at 9:03 am

Hi, my ex and i dated for 6 months. Everything was going great until before his finals. He asked that we don’t have contact for 2 months until he is done with his finals and I did that. Then after that, we argued and he said he didn’t think of me but said it and nothing to do with me, its something wrong with him. I went out and the night he gave me a call ending things when we intended to work things out before that but my mom gave him a phonecall when she saw me in tears without me knowing while I was out. He thinks I put my mom up to it and was so upset that he called me psycho and all other horrible names after I tried talking him into not giving up on us. He is so stubborn and says he is done for good. I am still hurting as I felt he was the love of my life. What can I do to make him speak to me again? And is there a chance that he will come back? He is so stubborn and said he never goes back to things that once was.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

January 8, 2020 at 11:08 pm

Hi Sam, so it is difficult time to go through finals the pressure worry and stress that happens during this time can take its toll on some people. So if you want your ex back, you need to complete a No Contact and during that time you need to work on yourself so when finals and he is over the “relief” stage of this he may be open to speaking to you where you need to keep it friendly and short at first and build it up as Chris explains in his value chain videos and articles

Sam

January 3, 2020 at 9:03 am

Hi, my ex and i dated for 6 months. Everything was going great until before his finals. He asked that we don’t have contact for 2 months until he is done with his finals and I did that. Then after that, we argued and he said he didn’t think of me but said it and nothing to do with me, its something wrong with him. I went out and the night he gave me a call ending things when we intended to work things out before that but my mom gave him a phonecall when she saw me in tears without me knowing while I was out. He thinks I put my mom up to it and was so upset that he called me psycho and all other horrible names after I tried talking him into not giving up on us. He is so stubborn and says he is done for good. I am still hurting as I felt he was the love of my life. What can I do to make him speak to me again?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

January 5, 2020 at 12:29 am

Hey Sam, read about the Ungettable and apply that to your life so that you show your ex using social media how amazing you are and all these things you are doing with your life and they are missing out on, do things that you said you would do together – without them. Do things that are exciting, adventurous, things that are so unlike you.

Andrea

November 22, 2019 at 2:20 am

Hi Chris,
My ex and I have been off and on for 10 years. The first time we broke up is because I wouldn’t allow him to move his abusive family member in with us. Within 2 months he found someone that he ultimately married. I stayed clear. Then one day he came back crying saying he made a mistake and that it was supposed to be me not her that he married. He divorced her and said he wanted to try again and that he missed his best friend. Because of the emotional roller coaster I yes and no him about a relationship for a year. When we did get into a committed relationship he showed signs of chesting with 5 months. Cheating indeed he was. I cried told him that we should work on this not him cheating. He said I was stressing him out on top of everything else in his life. Within five months he was back. I told him if I took him back that it would be the last time so for months he put forth 100%. Then I learned of the abusive family member returning so I told him when he moved in the following month they couldn’t come. So instead of breaking up with me he cheated and I learned of it through fb. He said I was making assumptions. Lo and behold he was dating her. Because I invested my all I am hurt and distraught and tried everything told him I needed him. He said he is done and will never return. I miss and love him and feel we dont give our relationship real chances because of all the issues that come into play. Instead of him talking it out he finds other women to stroke his ego. He also said that I wouldn’t let my family know that we were together. I tried to explain that we needed to make real changes like him moving in first which is what he promised me when he returned and marriage. He wasnt hearing that. Now he wont return my calls or allow us to fix things vs him cheating and dating someone else and realizing later that we are suppose to be together. I always move on and date but nothing serious. Can this be fixed? He’s so stubborn and parading the new girl like I never existed.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

November 24, 2019 at 6:22 pm

Hi Andrea, so I think there is a chance to get him back yes as an on and off again relationship usually gets back together, but you are also likely to break up again unless you work through your issues in a mature and controlled way. For example couples therapy. But that is somethign you need to look into and prepare for. Following the program will show your ex how you are not going to tolerate his behavior going forward and he would need to change to get back with you

Ju

November 20, 2019 at 8:27 pm

Hi!

So I was in a relationship for 3 years an a half, we broke up 1 month ago. 2 years into the relationship I found out he wrote with other girls and we broke up for one week. The following months were awful because I didn’t trust him. These last months we were really getting happier, once we had a fight an he said we needed to break up an he said he wrote with another girl again. So we both decided we needed some time. We said we loved each other. He said he would only come back when he was sure he wouldn’t hurt me. So 3 weeks go by an I was fine with myself, I found myself again and reached out to him. I thought we could start over and be happy. But he said he doesn’t feel the same anymore. That he was fine alone.
I put way to much pressure on him an I think he thinks he is better like this because he doesn’t have that pressure. I think deep down he loves me and we only need to bring that love back up. I am deeply in love an I see my future with him.

Should I still hope to him to come back??

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

November 24, 2019 at 12:43 am

Hi Ju if you follow the program properly then yes have hope giving that you are doing the work, you get better results the more work you put in to this system

millie

November 20, 2019 at 4:47 pm

My boyfriend broke up with me because he said that he didn’t feel very connected to me. we were in a long distance relationship. His mother died and now they’re having family issues and he says he’s drowning so he broke up. he wants to figure himself out but i love him, he loves me, i’m going crazy and I don’t know what to do. I don’t think that no contact will work on him. he’s the kind of person that doesn’t care if you reach out or not and whenever you do its okay.

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

November 23, 2019 at 1:34 pm

Hi Millie, so with the situation where they lose someone close to them. Exes can want to be alone and have that head space to deal with their emotions properly. All you can really do is follow this program and take it slowly as you are going to have to keep in mind the extra pressure he is feeling right now with the loss of his mother.

Nikesha

October 22, 2019 at 6:21 am

Hey my boyfriend left me for his ex girlfriend. -Before the ex girlfriend- So we was together for two years then left me for another woman because I went away he was lost without me he said, anyways he left he’s ex girlfriend to go back with me. Again so then we was together for 2 months and in that two months we was arguing everyday until he got over he’s ex girlfriend he was fine. One day he got up and left him again for his ex girlfriend, now there together again, do U think he’ll come back to me?? I had him before the ex girlfriend, his ex cheated on him more then once that’s why he left too. But he still went back I have no idea why?!

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

October 22, 2019 at 6:27 pm

Hi Nikesha, it sounds like hes not sure about what he wants himself. I would suggest if he was to come back he cuts all contact with the other exes so that this doesn’t happen again and you need to work on the reasons you were arguing and broke up again

Van

October 19, 2019 at 7:41 am

Hi wanna need some opinion. I had a boyfriend for almost 2 yrs. I recently broke him up on sunday because i am now tired with the relationship i had with him. I was the one finding ways to communicate with him. And i only see him in every 3months because of his job. And everytime he went home he couldn’t even spare me a piece of time. He’s busy drinking with his friends instead giving me time. He also ghosted me for almost 3 weeks after his aunt talked to my mom about marriage. Now, there is a part of me wanting to move on. But there is a part of me waiting and wanting him to initiate first. I love him and accept him for what he is. What to do to make your prideful ex back, realize my worth and loving me more back?

EBR Team Member: Shaunna

October 20, 2019 at 7:59 am

Hi Van so first you need to remember why you ended things because thats likely not to change unless he realises hes lost you. So during your NC of 30 days you need to work on yourself and live your life. Basically doing the “moving on” things and just focusing on you. To get him back you will have to re build attraction but with a man who has little time you will have to do this through social media posts looking “Ungettable” read some more articles on this website look at the products you will find useful information about your situation.

Dasha Robinson

August 20, 2019 at 1:48 am

Hey Chris,
I broke up with a guy that I dated for over a year and we work together. I broke up with him like two months ago and its was hard letting him go. He wanted to be friends but I couldnt because I still had feelings for him. The reason I broke up with him because we both desired different things in life. He felt like, i broke up with him was like a stab in his heart. I love him but I wanted more but I knew holding on will hurt more. I did try the friend thing but it was still fresh because he still wanted to do things like we was still a couple and i felt it was mixed signals. And at that time, i didnt do the NC rule because I found myself insecure that he will moved on. So we hunged out for awhile throughout July after breakup in May but i felt weird because I thought he got the understanding of the breakup but no. We got into another disagreement about the breakup, so I told him that we can’t we be friends right now and its best for me to focus on myself. So now here I am in this NC and it been 27 days and its killing me. I miss him like crazy. I want to reach out so badly to say “hey” but i know I cant do that.
Sam

June 29, 2019 at 1:44 pm

Hi

I was with someone for almost 4 years. We were engaged and ready to get married, our wedding was called off 3 weeks before due to family issues. We still tried to make the relationship work and it went great for another year. He moved away from home and found a job soon as he did this he changed. He broke up with me again because ‘family’ wouldn’t agree to our marriage again (don’t as, we’re asian) I’ve seen him out with a girl just a few days after our breakup calling her ‘babe’ him flirting with other girls. I loved him so very deeply I still wanted it to work because he taught so hard to make his family accept our marriage in the beginning. He was madly in love with me to start with. Now I’ve set him up with a brilliant career etc. We have been on and off for so long we see each other once in 4/5 months. I’ve done the NC and it didn’t work. Now he refuses to speak to me tell me I need to move on and he has said some nasty stuff to me. His moved back home now and had a new job. He gives me mixed signals, it was only last month we met again and had the most amazing time together and I really thought I won him over again. It worked for a few days till we argued about marriage and how it will work. This issue has happened between us for over a year where we have been on and off. He knows how much I love him and that I’m always there regardless of the time we don’t talk. I want to know will he ever regret loosing me? Is he ever going to realise and come back? I feel he has moved on and accepted this for what they are. I am so scared of loosing him to someone else. I am doing th NC but I fear it won’t change anything. please help me
Ashley

May 21, 2019 at 10:29 pm

Hi Chris,

I was with my boyfriend for 10 years. We lived together that entire time and our relationship has had many obstacles. We have been through the death of his mother, both of us not working due to going back to school full time, issues with his ex-wife (and mother of his children), issues with his kids and their mother telling them not to like me. Our biggest issues have always been money and communication. He is not the best communicator and he takes on all the responsibility and tries to fix problems alone. A month and a half ago he told me we were better off as friends and that he missed me as his best friend. He also stated his feelings have changed, he cares for me but does not have romantic feelings. We broke it off and remained friends. Due to finances I have been living with him still, we have minimal contact. He stated today that he is awkward around me and that one of us needs to move out. Since it is his house I am leaving. He continues to state that he wants to be friends and hopes we can be friends and hang out but is adamant that we will never have romantic feelings again. He has recently been on a date that a friend of his set him up on. He is continually offering me money to help me out and that he will support me through the process of finding a house. He continually gives mixed signals. I still love him deeply and feel we can work it out but I am at a loss right now. Is this something that can even work?
Lexie

May 6, 2019 at 8:20 pm

Hi Chris,

I watch all your videos, have read all your blogs. They’ve helped me stay strong with 25 days no contact. I came across this blog post and can relate. My Ex is beyond stubborn and once he puts his mind to something he sticks with it. He told me he loved me the day we broke up, we were together for almost two years. I need some advice I know you said sometimes its good for the girl to reach out once the no contact is over, but i feel like i was the one to reach out before and this time i feel like he should be the one to reach out. I honestly don’t know what to do. Out of the two years we never went more than a day without talking and now this past month has been the hardest. I’ve kept busy, I post what it looks like me moving on.. on social media and he watches all my posts, he even watches my sisters and my friends posts. I don’t know what to do.

Chris Seiter

May 6, 2019 at 10:32 pm

HI Lexie…I am glad the site has helped you stay the course with you NC. Sounds like you should continue with NC and when your NC period is over, reach out in the way I teach in my Program

Mona

May 4, 2019 at 5:35 pm

Hi! Thanks for all the amazing posts and the website. I’ve been hanging around here a lot and I really appreciate it!

So my ex bf broke up with me 2 months ago and I finished NC said he wanted to date more bc he wasn’t sure about me and wanted to see what else is out there(which I think is related to GSGS as well.) We got back in contact since last month. We still haven’t gone to romantic dates yet but I’m pretty sure he’s still attracted to me.

But last week we went out with bunch of mutual friends and talked about our relationship afterwards. He cried and said it’s been really hard for him and he thinks about me everyday, he’s still not sure if he made the right decision, and that even though he didn’t want to be with me the feelings don’t just go away. He said maybe other ppl would say if you like her that much then why not give it another try. But he feels like he already know what’s like to be with me and sometime I seem like a total different person to him and he really doesn’t like that girl, which I know I have this problem sometimes I get verbally aggressive and brutal I’m not proud of it and I really do want to change. I was shocked by his tears so I comforted him a bit and we made up and talked a lot about past and got opened up to each other. I felt closer to him again and we cuddled a bit. He then walked me home and we ended up making out.

It’s been a week and we hasn’t talked yet. I’m thinking of giving him some time to process what happened but I don’t know how long. And I think he really still has feelings for me but he’s still very stubborn about the break-up. Should I imply NC again or should I keep building attraction? Thanks a lot!!

Chris Seiter

May 5, 2019 at 1:34 am

Thanks Mona…so yes, I think NC can offer a lot solutions for people.

Cancer Woman

April 2, 2019 at 1:06 pm

Hi! Well my ex boyfriend and I (he is a Pisces and I’m a cancer) were together for 1 and a half years (it would have been our 2 years in 2 months…) and he recently broke up with me about a month ago. Basically, I never saw this coming because of how nurturing and loving he was and he always loved me physically and emotionally. He left me because of how intense our fights were and I was a very self conscious girlfriend but we were both very manipulative and aggressive. I have been trying to do the No Contact Rule since we broke up but have failed it twice. Both times I reached out to him he kind of blew me off (not telling me to leave him alone or anything but basically saying “I still love you and want to be with you but just not right now” and to me it still hurts because this is well out of his character) I have started doing the NCR again (it’s been a week) and he texted me yesterday morning say this “Hey 🙁 I hope you are doing okay I miss you so much I’m just texting to let you know that 22 days from now 2 years ago I met the love of my life and spent so many amazing memories with that girl I think about you all the time :(“ and I ignored it. Do I have a chance of getting him back? Is the no contact rule still going to work even if I just ignored that text message? I’ve blocked him on my Facebook messenger and Instagram but he hasn’t blocked me on anything. Ps he is 21 years old and I’m 20 – just so you have a mental idea on the maturity age etc.

Chris Seiter

April 2, 2019 at 9:45 pm

Hi there….so I am thinking you need to hold firm with your NC strategy and implement it in the way I teach in my Program, though it sounds like he is getting closer to seeing the bigger picture. You get a few of these positive reach outs from him, then you may want to conclude your NC and proceed slowly with re-connecting.

Nana

March 18, 2019 at 7:54 am

It is a sad story, My ex boyfriend broke up with me for one month now. We have been dating for a year and a half.
He is an extremely stubborn person all the time, and what he thinks is right, you can never discuss or argue.
I think he would be the love of my life because he has a very caring personality, very detail minded, and he treat me so good even as a wife and buy me everything I want ( not all are very materials) and take care of me. I am the more dependent type of girl while he is much more mature and independent and he is just older than me 1 year.
Actually, our relationship has problem after 3 months of dating, just because I told him I do not want kids. He didn’t told me what he thinks , or even told me that kids may not be a MUST even til now. But somehow I know he minds that and he think our CORE value is different, so we broke up after that. Even I told him right after that I doesn’t want kids because I get hurt in past relationship and I don’t have trust to a guy to an extend to have a kid. But now I meet him and know him longer , I think I am totally fine to accept kid with him. But it seems NONE of the words he believe, he think that I say so just to keep him stay. And when I try to discuss , he always ignore this issue.

My boyfriend not only stubborn, I think he is someone of OCD issue and he is EXTREMELY aware of cleanliness or tidiness of everything . Many of his friend already called him Mr trouble. Seems no one can cope with his standard. Even I carelessly spill something on him , he will be extremely angry for awhile immediately.
I think that is because I am a dependent type of girl and I show him I do not like kids right at the beginning of the relationship, he always get this in his head and so our relationship never get big progress. Even seldom have physical intimacy and he does not like or avoid kissing me. He told me because of he think our CORE value ( do not want kids) is different, so he avoid to get close to me because he cannot foresee a marriage in future.
But I can really feel that we are in love and our soul are so connected, deeper than any of my previous relationship except the physical intimacy. I feel so sad before, but I think if I can convince him that I actually do want kids with him and I try to be more independent to meet his standard.
It is actually the 4th times of breaking up and all the reason is because I feel he cannot progress and get close to me, then I am mad at him and give him emotion, then he will say just to break up. This is the sequence.

I don’t know what I can do to convince him that I can be the one for him, loving kids and meeting his standard. So we can have progress and get close physically in our relationships.
Because he is so sensitive and everytime I raise a topic about kids and he just like ignore and don’t want listen or think that I make up something for him to believe. Honestly I did not want kid in the past, but I do change because of him.
Now, we still dating as before, and holding hands, and he still take care of me everyday and buy me everything. But the only change is he clearly told me that our relationship is over and he does not kiss me anymore. It seems super strange to me now.

Chris Seiter

March 18, 2019 at 10:16 pm

Hi Nana…well, one thing you can consider is if you continue to be unhappy with the direction the relationship, you can take a full break from it which is also called implementing No Contact. Much to know about how that works. I recommend you pick up my epic 485 page Program Guide, “Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro” to learn more

Vanisa

February 12, 2019 at 5:04 am

Hi sir.i m in a complex situation.though i m dealing quite well but how do i know what’s there going on in his head.my parents came to know about it on jan4.And it was last i had contact with him.Though i act that his presence dosent bother me but that dosent add to the fact that i dont think about him.he broke up with me on nov17.After nov17 i seriously went on ignoring him and he thought that i moved on.then he saw me talking to my bff and it looked that he was jealous.but why did he took stand for me against his friends.Sir,please give me a peoper explanation to it.you are the only one to help me.what should i really do?and i know you will help me.he looks at me through a reflection,through crowd.but why?does he have feelings for me.he was the first person i accepted as my bff.it was first time i ever After on my feelings and trust me i still hate this relationship thing a lot ,from starting because it soo virtual.there are so many guys out there proposing me.but i dont accept it at all ’cause i hate it.
Vanisa

February 10, 2019 at 9:57 am

My ex told me several times that he loved me a lot.2 months were very great but then he got jealous of my best friend and asked me to stop talking to him.my best friend proposed me 10 times and I refused .Once he even held my hand and then I immediately told my ex.he was pissed.then y ex broke up with me saying that I broke his trust because he asked me several times not to talk to him.i pleaded and said sorry a lot.then there was patch u.meanwhile I stopped seeing my best friend.but after 1 month he broke up again saying that he wants to focus on his career.but I doubt his explanation.to a friend he said that I have trust issues.then finally I stopped seeing y ex and strictly followed nc.since break up his friends started mocking at me.i ignored once twice thrice.then took stand for myself.i and his ex gf had fight and he supported me.then I couldn’t control myself and started talking to him.meanwhile his mother sensed something bad and he warned me not to text him,he was cold.now he looks at me then ignores what do I do.

Chris Seiter

February 10, 2019 at 10:34 pm

Hi Vanisa!

Sounds like a little space will do you both good. Tap into my Program for more insights

Harreth

January 3, 2019 at 5:39 am

I broke up with him last december 16 2018. I got mad thats why I made a decision. Then I tried to win him back. But now he doesnt feel the same anymore. I texted him a lot. I even went to his house. Hes cold and hot. He said he doesnt love me anymore. He blocked me on social media. He also told the cause of break up to his family. I greet him on holiday. Seems he doesnt care anymore. After that I do th nc rule. Her cousin which Im not close to her unexpectedly chatting me during new year. That cousin of her never do that anyways. Then I have a guts that its him. I know he has a trust issue about me. I still want him back. I still post some on my stories and facebook that Im not affected anymore. What should I do?

Chris Seiter

January 3, 2019 at 11:22 pm

Hi Harreth!

NC can help settle things down and also help you to find some healing along with doing some things to enhance your chances. Visit my site’s home page to review some of the tools and resources I make available!

Tiffany

December 3, 2018 at 3:21 pm

My boyfriend and I were together for 3 years and we broke up four months ago.. failed horribly at NC.. he’s extremely hot and cold, I try to be there for him because he is in a dark place and I want to spark some positivity in him but he’s very rude to me and his responses are very dry. He doesn’t care about himself anymore or anyone’s feelings. I love him so much but he keeps saying things got boring and that he loves me and cares about me but is not in love but I believe where there is love you can always respark the relationship.. He always says things like we can try again in the future or that right now he is not for a relationship and then switches up. He’s confusing me yet I still want advice on how to get him back.. I still feel the connection when he is near me (yes we hung out many times post breakup, I even slept over) I failed at no contact. ALSO.. he is very very VERY prideful

Chris Seiter

December 3, 2018 at 9:28 pm

Hi Tiffany….I am sorry your ex is so rude. You don’t deserve that. It seems your ex has taken a selfish path. Go pick up my eBook, “Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro” as there is much for you to learn and ideas for you to implement!

Lily

November 14, 2018 at 10:25 am

Me and my bf broke up last week. We have been together for one and half year. It has been almost one week. I didn’t talk to him since then. He didn’t talk to me either. We had dinner on Friday night, then he said we need to break up on Saturday. I had feeling he probably gonna break up with me, coz he has been very distant over the past week. He said I have been consistantly mad at him. Most of the time he didn’t understand why I got angry. It made him feel he is terrible person. He was unhappy and can’t see the future with me. I admit that it’s my fault to upset at him. But we actually talked about why I got upset later on. I thought we were fine. I didn’t expect he would break up with me. I said we can work it out, but he said it won’t work out, coz both of us won’t change ourselves. I asked him is the break up just a while, he said forever. So I went back to home and he sent me message said he is sorry things had to end like that. I think the biggest problem for our relationship is I need to control my emotion, instead of giving him the unhappy face and being cold. I should just tell him why I got upset. So I think the reason coz our break up is my emotion issue and insecure issue. My bf is very stubborn and dertermined. Is there any chance I can get him back?
Alia

September 10, 2018 at 7:47 pm

Hi,
Me and my boyfriend broke up because he found out I went for a drink with my friend from work who’s a male, I only went because I wanted to watch the last half of the World Cup at a pub near where I work as if I traveled home I would have missed it. Anyway, I told my friend from work not to say we went for a drink because people would talk and I was worried about my now ex’s reaction as he’s quite hot headed and we did agree not to go out with people from work. I do feel so bad but I want to prove to him that I had no bad intentions I was just scared of arguing with him! He thinks I can’t be trusted and he’s now saying I tried to make him look like an idiot. That wasn’t the case I just didn’t want to argue! I’ve been doing no contact for a week, he’s so stubborn and has an ego I’m scared he won’t reach out during no contact. What’s the best thing to do in this situation?!

Chris Seiter

September 11, 2018 at 12:47 am

HI Alia…..it seems your ex overreacted and that is a shame. Time and space should help. Tap into my resources and tools here on the site…see home page!

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