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Kate
March 22, 2016 at 2:09 am
Hi Amor!
Gosh so I am just so worried at this point. My ex broke up on Jan. 16th, and he officially got with this new girl on Feb. 16th according to her insta…. She is one of his co-workers and I just can’t tell if it’s a rebound because he doesn’t post anything about this relationship at all but she does. He untags himself in all her photos and doesn’t like anything she posts but she posts about how much she loves him and how hot her boyfriend is and all the dates they go on but his face isn’t in any of the posts or his name. But like I am not sure how to take this. I am not in contact with him even though no contact is over bc I am not sure if he even wants to talk to me and I don’t want to push him closer to this girl. I have not interfered at all with it. I am just so confused as to why he is hiding this “relationship” or if it even is one. He likes all of my photos but not hers. He kept a few photos of me on his Instagram. Like what do I do? Is this relationship a real thing? Why is he hiding it? And he doesn’t know I know about her… WHAT DO I DO? WHAT DOES THIS ALL MEAN?
Kate
March 22, 2016 at 2:10 am
Oh and we were together for almost 5 years. So he can’t be over me right?
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 28, 2016 at 6:52 am
It looks like that.. If he’s hiding it that’s a good sign for you.. You can try to initiate contact now..
Ashley
March 17, 2016 at 4:49 am
Hi Chris,
My ex and I were together for 4 years and have been in each others lives for over 10. We broke up the second week in January because he believed I cheated on him. He snooped into my facebook and found some messages out of context and refused to let me explain. We were planning on moving in together finally and he had even bought me a ring for Christmas. I just recently found out a few weeks after we broke up he got drunk and slept with some girl he knew that comes into the bar he works at. I also just found out he is seeing a different girl who is 100% opposite of me and 7 years younger. (I’m 30 and he is 29)
it has barely been over 2 months and he has only started seeing this girl maybe 3 weeks ago. Everything points to being a rebound but I’m not sure if it is or isn’t. I did the NC and nothing came about from it. He said he isn’t putting a label on the two of them just yet so I don’t even know what to think. I love him with all of my heart but this is killing me.
He says he still loves me and thinks maybe sometime down the line we can try again but right now he needs to work on him. When he broke up he said he wasn’t interested in someone else and then boom this happened. He said it had been 2 months and he had already moved on. Is that even possible to move on that fast and forget everything?
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 17, 2016 at 1:22 pm
Hi Ashley,
if he believes you cheated, it’s possible that he had moved because of the hurt.. or he may just be saying that and using the girl to help him move on.. But if nc didn’t work and also of he knows you want him back and he said that, it means either you move on or try to do another nc
Ashley
March 16, 2016 at 9:11 pm
Hi. My ex and I dated for six (great) years and I broke up with her back in October. We started dating very young (17) until the age of 23. She was very distant and started talking to other girls at her job. We have been broken up for a total of 5 months now and she started dating a new girl about two weeks after moving out of our apartment. We have been having contact off and on this whole 5 months and I even did the no contact and 14 days later she called me and I caved in. Next week she went right back to the new girl. Two weeks ago she broke up with the new girl again (third time now) and let her know she wasn’t over me completely and that if she continued their relationship she would be lying to herself. We hung out for a total of 5 days after they broke up and then on day six she lied to me and had the new girl drop her off at work. We got into an argument about it and now she is telling me she needs space before we can ever be friends again. I am starting the no contact period over. I know she still has feelings for me but she ignores them.Her and this girl have been “dating” for two months but argue and have trust issues. Should I just forget about her and move on? Or give her “space” and allow this toxic relationship with the new girl to burn out as it always seems to. I have been chasing this girl for almost 6 months and I think that’s the problem. Maybe I just need to let her come to me so we could possibly try again? Is it possible that we just started dating so young and she feels she missing something out there? She tells me this girl will never be me but I’m so confused on why she goes back?
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 17, 2016 at 1:42 am
Hi Ashley,
You’re right . It’s because you’re chasing and it can also be because you started young. She knows she can get back with you anytime.. And she has to feel the urgency of getting you back because you won’t be there anymore for her not to take you for granted
Ellie
March 16, 2016 at 2:55 pm
My ex boyfriend and I had been together for over 4 years. He broke up with me to “find himself”, we were planning on moving in together in a few months so he wanted to make sure this is what he wanted 100% before taking that step. Shortly, after the breakup he got into a rebound relationship (it shows all the signs of a rebound). I did no contact and shortly after no contact ended he began calling and texting me. His family told me, he got very emotional after seeing me at a social event and said he would always love me and things would never be the same with anyone else. So he has been texting me for the past week and we have met up 2 times. However, he is currently still with his rebound girl. I am not sure what to do next?
Ellie
March 17, 2016 at 2:02 pm
Ok thank you!
Ellie
March 17, 2016 at 3:38 am
We have hung out twice and he acts like he normally would. But he has not flat out said he wants to get back together. He has expressed his feelings to his family not me. But I feel like he is trying to take things slowly.
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 17, 2016 at 1:19 pm
okay give it two more weeks.. if after that he doesn’t leave the other girl be distant..tell him you’re not confortable talking to him, knowing he has a girlfriend
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 17, 2016 at 12:00 am
Hi Ellie,
has he opened up to you about his feelings?
Trying to move on without moving on...
March 16, 2016 at 7:52 am
Yes it is me! It has been too difficult to get a conversation going – have shared stuff he likes, asked him about his life, tried to tell a story… just get a brief reply and then no openings for the conversation to continue. I’m trying to send something once a week now but wonder if should leave it even longer. I think being there at a distance might just mean he will take for granted he could get me back whenever and then he won’t care to?
Poppy
March 31, 2016 at 8:08 am
Hi Amor, I tried contact again after a two week break, just to wish a happy Easter but no reply at all! He seems to be concentrating on his new relationship. Completed quiz on this site which came out with “hang in there” but I have no clue what to try next. What do you think?
EBR Team Member: Amor
April 3, 2016 at 10:09 am
Hi Poppy,
If he hasn’t been replying for a while now, it’s better to move on. Hang in there can also mean you have to wait, but with that, it means you have to set a timeline until you can wait.
Trying to move on without moving on...
March 17, 2016 at 11:44 pm
So I think you are suggesting stopping communication? I guess my recent messages will have left open the door should he want to contact me in future. Do let me know if I have misunderstood anything but from what you say, there is little hope now. Thanks again for your advice
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 19, 2016 at 8:11 am
Yes for now..
Trying to move on without moving on...
March 17, 2016 at 10:40 am
His reply to my initial couple of messages was positive, but now it’s just brief – and none of these times has he asked about me! He is not in the same place as either of us now but I wonder if he might be concentrating on his new relationship (now 5 weeks) and if that might have moved beyond rebound to something more significant 🙁
Should I contact even less or continue trying to build interest in my messages? Or both!
Poppy
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 17, 2016 at 2:33 pm
if your recent messages aren’t generating interest and attraction that means you have stop..actually you should be progressing to calls by now.. but if it’s not happening that means you’re about to head to friendzone or you’re already being friendzoned
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 16, 2016 at 9:59 pm
Correct me if I’m wrong with my understanding, you mean popping up once a week made him think you’re just present and now he’s taking you for granted.. so, you want to not message him longer so he wouldn’t think that and miss you?
Trying to move on without moving on...
March 11, 2016 at 11:35 am
I wrote some time ago about my situation – met ex travelling and we both agreed we had an amazing time together, maintained a sort-of LDR for 4 mths but when I went to see him, he told me he had met someone new the previous week. This was even though he had been planning fun activities for my visit and messaging me a lot in the days leading up to it. He decided to end with her when I arrived but said he could still not be in a relationship due to work (said he could not dedicate so much time). I accepted that because I know his work is important and he wont be in one place again for another six mths. Looking back it might be he had feelings for us both and just couldn’t decide – or he had lined up his rebound in case things didnt work between us?
We still got on well in spite of all this but he wasnt so invested in spending time with me as when we travelled together. We parted on good terms, spoke once after I left and agreed to stay in touch. I started NC but noticed around this time he was still in contact with the other girl on social media. One month later they got together as a couple (a few days after he messaged me). This will be LDR based on maybe four or five meetings. From his posts, it seems he is developing strong feelings for her and she is taking on a lot of his interests and very proud to be his girlfriend. He is not in the same place as either of us so there would be no physical relationship but I know they have plans to meet in a couple months. I guess that might be make or break.
I tried messaging a few times and received positive replies but it is hard to get a conversation going and the last message I sent, he didn’t even reply. What would you suggest now?
Ps. I’m happy to purchase one of the books if this might be of help to me in my situation but maybe you think I should focus on moving on? I am early 30s, they are both late 30s.
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 11, 2016 at 1:02 pm
Hi!
I remember you’re Poppy right? I checked my replies to you and I never got to reply what Chris said..but actually it was also the same with what I said.. I’ll ask.him again with your update
Dayah
March 8, 2016 at 1:43 pm
I have been with my ex boyfriend for 5 years. Until this past two weeks he said that he disheartened with me. Its all started when we are arguing about some college trip that he went without telling me. He apologise but i refuse. I try to apologise then but he said he already have someone else. Its just been like 3 or 4 days after we argueing. Right now, he with his new girlfriend who is his classmates. As far as i know, he said he doesnt like the idea of having a lover in the same classroom. But then he did. I want to get back with him but he said that he love his new girlfriend so much and he been posting all over the social network about their new relationship. I dont know what to do. It is a rebound relationship? What can i do to get him back?
Dayah
March 10, 2016 at 11:13 am
No. I dont have any other plan in mind. Right now i in the no contact rule. But im not sure if i can do it properly.
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 10, 2016 at 11:55 pm
try it firasr and be active in improving and finding happiness apart from him
Dayah
March 9, 2016 at 1:41 pm
But he seems to love his new girlfriend so much. And i think that his new girlfriend also recently just had a break up. He said he already move on. Im just so afraid that he might get away……
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 9, 2016 at 8:36 pm
they might be in the honeymoon period..
Always be prepared for somekne to leave..I mean it’s ok to be afraid but if someone is not within our standards and doesn’t want to be, they really have to go away..
If you can’t do no contact..of course it’s okay.. do you mean you have another plan in mind?
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 9, 2016 at 10:47 am
Hi Dayah,
it can be.. but for now.. stop approaching and talking to him
do no contact.. if approaches you during no contact, just amswer him directly, short and polite and then excuse yourself..no small talk, don’t look at him, don’t smile at him during nc and improve yourself
sara_13
March 4, 2016 at 8:15 pm
Hello,
My ex-boyfriend and I broke up in August, but after that we talked until December. We did not have any kisses or anything during those 4 months. He traveled to his country in December through January. When he came back, I was in no contact rule, but a few days ago. I figured out he is dating someone else. I knew during those four months he was talking to someone, but he just lied to me. The last text message we sent to each other was Dec 31st, and after that we never talked. Do you think is he in a rebound relationship? We were together for 2 years and 6 months. We had really good memories, but the last months of relationships we weren’t really happy.
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 5, 2016 at 9:29 am
If they started during those 4 months it may not be rebound anymore now
Reen
March 4, 2016 at 8:45 am
Hello,
My ex and I had been together for 2 years. Although a long distance. We got engaged 2015 feb. But we had constants fights although we solved them. However from November the fights got worse and we opted to give each other a break to resolve our issues. I was a very reactive person and I didn’t follow the no contact rule during the break, I once became so rude after he tried contacting me after a shot period of no contact. He went silent again, he told me to tell everyone that he has officially broken up with me then all of a sudden he denied ever saying that. He has been telling me he is single until I recently learned that he’s in a relationship with another lady,. A relationship that started in January, and we broke up in December. He doesn’t post the new relationship on social media but he has introduced the new gf to all his friends and when they ask him about our engagement he tells them we weren’t right for each other. I still love him and it’s hard for me to move on, please advise me.
Thanks
EBR Team Member: Amor
March 5, 2016 at 4:44 am
Hi Reen,
when did you last talked to each other?
Beibi
February 27, 2016 at 7:43 pm
I was in a 2 and 1 month relationship with my now ex boyfriend he’s 40 and I’m 26 we lived together. He left the girl he was having an adventure (told me he always clear to the girl there is no future for them (18 years old girl) for couples of months. Our relationship was happily. I like the same thing same dream and he always told me that he never loved anyone before me. Then things got super crazy I become aggressive and would physically hurt myself or him out of jealousy or fear or fight or would not let us sleep. I had a very abusive relationship with my mom. She would beat me to death and this resurfaced when my uncle who I looked up as a father got killed, then I lost my first pregnancy, lost my grandfather had to give up with my second pregnancy because of depression and fear of becoming like my mom and be left alone with a child by my ex boyfriend, lost my job, lost another pregnancy, fear of losing my new job. He would tell me to continue my therapy with a doctor but I (involuntarily and unfortunately) didn’t.He has a guest house and I got jealous of this new girl who was cleaning it (I’m a very jealous person with him out of fear and love) he would tell me there is nothing and I’m just imagining everything he would even swear out of his mother life. Then one night after he accompanied me to work he called me and told me he doesn’t want me because he’s in a relationship with the cleaning lady and I was looked out of our house while they were inside telling me to go. The next morning he insisted the same thing then told me he doesn’t see his future with me anymore because I’m too aggressive and that he’s in a new relationship. I found out from a friend that it’s been months since he was looking out for a way to cure our relationship or it might end because he cannot hold on to my aggressiveness. I asked him not to throw my stuff as I’m still looking for a place to stay since I’m expecting him to be rude after what happened. 4 days I asked my aunt to call him to ask for some clothes for work (expecting him to bring many) he brought just couples of pieces of clothes. Then the next day I ask my aunt again to take my documents since I’m going to continue my therapy and my aunt told me that my stuff are still the same as I left them. I’m not talking nor texting him. And he’s the same I’m puzzled why he still hasn’t cleaned my stuff when there the cleaning girl the night we broke up.
EBR Team Member: Amor
February 28, 2016 at 1:34 pm
Hi Beibi,
We don’t know why but the most important factoer is you.. whether you get back with him or not.. as of now, you have to learn to handle things by yourself and also to find happiness by yourself too.. You have to experience what it feels like to be happy because you find or you made or you chose to be happy… Not because of man or another person.. So, that when you get into a relationship, you know you’re whole and ready to love
Tailor
February 26, 2016 at 8:27 pm
Hello, I have a big issue so I’m going to get straight to it, we * me and my ex boyfriend * moved from or hometown together left everything behind for a fresh start, we had started working together and we had meet a friend we all worked together and talked I quit working there she was with her ex for 4 years they have 2 kids together…. She had been contacting my ex for advice but it start becoming more than that I’m guessing me and him had got into a arguemtnt and he went and ran to her with it at work, me and him have always been super close we’ve been together for 2 years, We spoke she said they weren’t nothing and she was working on thing with her ex fiancé, she’s 25 my ex he’s 19 she gave herself to him and they weren’t even together like how easy is she, she knew we where together and I was still with him and now he and she have been together for 5 weeks moved in together after 2 weeks & now stays together they are already talking about having kids but he still pops up over here and they act all happy and she even said she loves him after only a month I don’t know if he says it back. Could he move on that fast? Now they talk bad about me recently he had text I didn’t text back popped up 30 mins later and I had told him I didn’t want to talk to him because there were still feelings there I don’t understand why he still pops up He came over literally 6 days ago. I love him so much & he has told me he loves me back, I don’t want to lose him but I don’t know what to do to get him back, could you help? I honestly feel like they are moving to fast , did he lose feelings that fast? Did he ever care about me?
Jorie
February 25, 2016 at 3:18 am
Hi I was in a ldr with my ex for about 3 and half years and unfortunately me and him got into an argument which we both said hurtful things and he broke up with me and started to talk to another girl in his area less than 48 hours he told me how happy he was without me and he couldn’t cut off someone for his ex so I left him alone and he contacted me on valentines day and then started to tell me how he is still tlkn to someone and doesn’t know what the future might hold. From that I began the no contact rule and all i am seeing is him a his new relationship my question is really happy with this person can this “relationship” be promising?
EBR Team Member: Amor
February 25, 2016 at 1:34 pm
Hi Jorie,
if they met just right after the breakup it might be rebound..
kayla
February 23, 2016 at 2:00 am
My ex and i had been together 4 yrswe have one child and another on the way he told me he was going to start staying a few nights a week so we could get back together 2 days later he had a new gf and she told me they were together he just stopped talking to me. He also told me he was upset that his mate had talked to me asking if it was me at a servo that day, he said he was going to start talking to my friends (which is his new gf ). They started dating 2 wks ago now. Im just wondering what his go is and if hes comi mg back?
EBR Team Member: Amor
February 24, 2016 at 5:51 am
Hi Kayla,
I know he’s the father of your child, but If he got into an affair while you’re pregnant, what stops him later on? Think about if this is really the life you want. He’ll probably continue to do that until he sees he can.. And he will see he can while you’re not walking away..Be strong.. your child and incoming baby is your priority right now.. You shouldn’t be worrying and harming your baby..I know it’s hard but right now that’s the best solution
ANON
February 22, 2016 at 11:20 pm
Hi, my ex boyfriend and I were together for 3 and a half years. We are each other’s first kiss, first love, everything. About 2 weeks after we “officially” broke up, he started pursuing someone else. He started dating her about a month later, but broke up with her after less than a month. He actually cheated on her with me, me mot knowing about her at the time. In a time frame of 2-3 weeks he began seeing another girl, who he is now dating. He has most likely been dating her for a maximum of 1 month, if not less. She is the opposite of me, very talkative, a party animal, and with friends to match. Definitely not the type he would normally go for, however she fits the lifestyle that he wants to explore, which involves lots of partying and drinking. Very out of character for him. I suspect the reason for the break up was so that he could go out and experience the “young” life, since being in a long term relationship so young didn’t give him a chance to do so. As a result, however, his relationship with his mom has become inxreasingly strained, and he no longer does well in school or has a plan for after highschool. Do you think this new girl is a second rebound relationship? It has been a total of nearly 4 months since the official break up, but only about 1 and a half since the last time we slept together, and even less time than that since the last time he told me he loved me, still had feelings, etc. He actually called me a few days ago to “see how I’m doing”, and almost immediately told me that he was seeing this new girl, however he made it sound like they weren’t official even though they clearly are. (I have seen them together and heard things from other people.) In the same breath, he asked me if I was dating anyone. I’m not sure if he’s trying to make me jealous or if he just had a moment of curiosity. I’m hoping he hasn’t moved on from me, and I do have a feeling that he will eventually get bored and annoyed with her and her friends, but I’m not counting on it.
Anyways, in a case where we were each other’s first love, dated for as long as we did, stayed in intimate contact for as long as we did, added to the fact that he never really took any time to be single/not pursue a relationship, is it possible that this second relationship after his rebound is also a rebound?
pandu
February 22, 2016 at 4:35 am
Hey..
I was in a ldr of 2hrs vth my bf fr 4 yrs…
We used to meet once in month…go to movies…chat ..occasionaly skype …
Nw wat the thng is..my bf cheated on me intially in the 1 st yr of our relation…he confessed and then later i accepted..and then we wer fyn till the tym v broke up…
Bt after the break up ..i gt to knw..that he has been moving way tooo close vth a jnr of his…who is completely opp to me….from 1year…nw hez gt commited to her vthin a mnth of brkup…
Till he was vth me..he used to nt put any posts in fb bt nw hez showering it der..
I dnt knw if its a rebound!!
The reason he gave and he literally meaning is that he wants a partying type of girl who drinks with him…roams with him…will it last??its gettn an year frm wen v broke up…i dnt understand y does he want such type of girl..wen i have been soo loyal to him!!
pandu
February 26, 2016 at 6:38 am
And i gt to know that hez commited to her when im der..bt nt sure of this!!
Will they b together…he says i know ua gud gal..bt ua nt of my type…ua perfect as a wife nt as a gf!!it jus hurts badly..when i hav been soo loyal..and he wants thngs lyks drinkn and partying stuff….
When v wer in a relation …i used to complain fr his excessive alcohol consumption..he used to say…get adjusted am i nt adjusting in wanting a trendy partying gal!!
It hurts..hw can he do this..
pandu
February 26, 2016 at 6:34 am
Ya they hav been …together..
His friends told he xpects drinkn and partying and stuff like dat!!and shez like one..hez flaunting soo much vth her..
EBR Team Member: Amor
February 26, 2016 at 12:01 pm
If they have been together for a year, that means it’s not rebound…It also means that she’s really likes that kind of girl
EBR Team Member: Amor
February 23, 2016 at 10:35 am
Hi Pandu,
I just to clear, you’ve broken up for a year now, and they’re together for a year now?
pandu
February 22, 2016 at 5:09 am
Im really nt understandn on why hez behavn lyk dat..many of his friends have askd y …dnt do this to him….bt he was very stern that he wants his gf to roam drink party.rich ..status..(gt this reason double checkd)…
And me nt being lyk dat is his reason of unhappiness
Lovely
February 21, 2016 at 5:05 pm
Is it considered a rebound if we were together for 4 years total with a 6 month break. When we got back together it was 1 year. He talked to a girl for a week and that girl told me he said he was single. I’m not sure to believe or not because she said he told her about us having a toxic relationship and being one sided after we broke up.When I thought I did all I could to have a happy relationship and it seemed like so. He got with her like a week or two after we broke up. When we were supposed to take a break to sort our feelings but he said she was helping him cope. Are the negative things he’s saying from the painful feelings after the breakup & to help him support his decision? Or are they true? Is he in a rebound in this case, so far they’ve been together for 2 months? And he seems convinced that they are doing well together so I’m not sure if he is serious about her…
Lovely
February 23, 2016 at 5:57 am
Should I even contact him again after 2 nc? He’s favoriting all her subtweets about me playing the victim, trying to drag him into my misery, and even her friend wanting to fight me and calling me a bitch. He disrespected me by choosing not to love me and to cheat on me with a girl he met for a week. He let her disrespect me by giving her my phone number. Now he has the balls to favorite those tweets and act like he never did anything wrong. And here I was thinking about messaging him one day to ask him to stop smoking since he started right after we broke up. I was worried for his health. Will they even last? It seems like they’re in a honeymoon phase since they didn’t know each other prior to getting together. Should I just be in no contact for 2-3 months maybe until he contacts me first? It worked last time when there wasn’t another girl in the picture.
EBR Team Member: Amor
February 24, 2016 at 6:26 am
with the way he’s acting now.. I don’t even think he’s worth it
EBR Team Member: Amor
February 22, 2016 at 11:28 am
Hi Lovely
it doesn’t look like rebound now.. maybe they started that way, but the longer the relationship, the more serious it would be.. Try to do no contact first before trying to contact him again…
Aubree
February 20, 2016 at 2:23 am
I think my ex boyfriend is currently in a rebound relationship but of course I worry it could be more serious. We had dated a little over 4 years and were planning to move in together in a few months. He broke up with me to work on himself for right now. He said he didn’t want to be done forever but right now he needed to do his own thing. He told me he wasn’t interested in any other girls and didn’t want a relationship with anyone else. Three weeks after we broke up he was in a relationship with another girl. It shows all the signs of a rebound relationship. He used to not post much on social media and now he posts every single thing they do. He also moved into it very fast and the girl is the complete opposite of me. I have started no contact. I just don’t want to give up on our relationship because it was great for both of us. Any other advice for me?
Lauren
February 25, 2016 at 2:02 am
Wow, I had the same exact experience. We dated a little over four years and he officially broke things off. A week and a half later I found out he was in a relationship with another girl he worked with who is already posting on social media about the two of them. However, I didn’t follow the “no contact” thing and totally ended up losing some self-respect.
Aubree
February 20, 2016 at 7:10 pm
We live in the same town.
EBR Team Member: Amor
February 21, 2016 at 11:11 am
olay.. finish the nc first.. make it proactive..Improve yourself and post it on social media.. let’s wait first how they are after your nc
EBR Team Member: Amor
February 20, 2016 at 10:27 am
Hi Aubree,
Do you work together or live in the same town?
Mila
February 18, 2016 at 11:21 am
I am pretty sure that my ex boyfriend is in a rebound relationship. We were together for 6 years (we started dating at age 18) and had a good relationship without much fighting. He said he started to doubt his feelings towards me and we tried to still make it work for a couple of months. Well, at least I tried.. After I broke it off with him because he couldn’t made up his mind (even though he still said he could see a future with me and maybe we just needed some time apart) I heard that there was a new girl in the picture. This was within a month of the breakup. I think she was in the picture earlier (as a potential rebound, no cheating). They are now official for 2-3 months I guess (breakup happend 5 months ago)…
So what do I do now ?
I did NC with him when we just broke up and now try to build some kind of ‘friendship’ (from the lioness theory) to still be in the picture.. I just have the feeling it is not working very well.
EBR Team Member: Amor
February 18, 2016 at 4:21 pm
Hi Mila,
You have to be more patient, because if they are in honeymoon phase, rebound or not, you have to wait until it fades
emma
February 16, 2016 at 4:27 pm
This is quite helpful. My boyfriend and I had been together 8 months and we broke up a week ago. I recently found out that 3 days later after we broke up he got into a new relationship, and they have been together so far for 4 days. Frankly I am not sure if this is a rebound or not.
We both go to the same college, but both of us were so busy, specially my ex boyfriend. Therefore we really did not have much time to actually a be a couple. We managed to spend some time together, there was a connection, and we told each other “I love you.” He broke up with me because he felt guilty of himself constantly being away all the time and having to always put work before anything else. He felt it was not fair for me to deal with that so thats why he did what he did. Frankly I am still a bit hurt. We broke up close to valentines day. A part of me wants to say this is a rebound, but the same time, I feel like it is not, what we lacked in the relationship was a plan for what to do if both of us ever got so busy, along with enough time to actually be together. So in a way, he is aiming to get that by being in the new relationship. Personally I think it is quite fast to be moving only after a week after you broke up with someone. I am quite happy for him, but getting over a break up is not easy, specially if its your first relationship
emma
February 18, 2016 at 3:29 pm
Yeah, I do.
emma
February 18, 2016 at 3:09 am
In response to the question, I am not even sure. I don’t even know his current girlfriend. I believe he might have known her while we were still together. That is, somewhere during our relationship, like the last stretch of it, he probably started seeing her and when the time came he decided to end things with me so he could continue his new relationship with his current girlfriend.
EBR Team Member: Amor
February 18, 2016 at 2:38 pm
okay so you plan on moving on right?
emma
February 18, 2016 at 1:36 am
In response to your question, I am not sure. I never bothered to ask him. I don’t even know his current girlfriend. However the fact that he managed to jump into a new relationship that quickly leads me to believe that during the last few months, somewhere along our relationship while we were together he was probably seeing another person, without telling me. He was most likely unhappy with our relationship and so was seeing another person. Once he managed to do that he waited for the right time to end our relationship so he can be happy with his new girlfriend. I do not have any hostility towards him. I think its more of the way he constructed it. I already deleted him from my skype and facebook so I can heal over this, and I am happy to say its going well.
EBR Team Member: Amor
February 17, 2016 at 10:01 am
Hi emma,
it’s too fast, does he know the girl before you broke up?
Min
February 16, 2016 at 12:47 pm
Hi Chris, me n my ex (old guy) we’re happily together for 3 years, we had a peaceful broke up 6 months ago over an issue. Soon after we broke up, we took turn to talk to each other a few times hoping we could get back together again, but we just can’t (when he hopes to get back together, I rejected. When I hope to get back together, he said no). A month after the breakup I started a relationship with a new guy and eventually broke up last week, I realised this was a rebound relationship as it was really hollow and I just couldn’t stop missing my ex when i was with this new guy. I went back to my ex (old guy) n confessed to him but he told me he had moved on n had no more feeling for me, a month ago he is into a new girl but they r not together yet. He said if I came back 2 or 3 months ago he would consider about it but now it’s a “no”. He said I couldn’t imagine how tiring it was when his friends n family came telling n kept asking him how can ur ex gf move on so quickly….
What should I do now, I felt that i ruined my own happiness, I really want him back..
Min
February 16, 2016 at 5:35 pm
Thank you for your reply Amor, yes he agreed that we can start as friends, but I don’t know what to do next.. give him some space? Or do I need to do the NC?
EBR Team Member: Amor
February 17, 2016 at 12:32 pm
of you asked him to get back with you, it’s better to do nc first, so he won’t think that your next efforts are to get him bacj
EBR Team Member: Amor
February 16, 2016 at 1:31 pm
Hi Min,
At least he’s talking to you.. can you start again as friends for now?