Popular posts
The Complete Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back
How To Make Him Miss You After A Breakup
The Ungettable Girl
The No Contact Rule (The Definitive Guide)
The Male Mind During The No Contact Rule
The Male Mind AFTER The No Contact Rule
What Your Ex Boyfriend Says Vs. What He Really Means
Here’s Exactly What He’s Thinking During The No Contact Rule
What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Blocks You
Signs My Ex Wants Me Back
Recent posts
How To Know If An Avoidant Is Using You
Signs An Avoidant Will Come Back After Losing You
Why Avoidants Don’t Want Relationships
Do Avoidants Fight For A Relationship?
An Avoidant Will Feel Instant Regret If You Do This
Signs An Avoidant Is Hiding Deep Feelings For You
Why Avoidants Say Things That Don’t Make Sense
The Weird Things Avoidants Do When They Like You
What Happens To An Avoidant During No Contact?
How A Secure Handles An Avoidant Pulling Away
Post categories
Peggy
February 13, 2015 at 6:01 am
Hi Chris,
me and my bf had been together for 14th years. we knew each other in school at 11 and later on at 13th years old we got together. how we got together was because we both study abroad in singaproe ( Im taiwanese and he is indonesia chinese) and because our family are not with us, we had each other accompanied and share our deepest thoughts to each other and also rely our feelings to each other. we both can chat all night, at first was just helping each other about who we like, but end up us liking each other, we have a lot of common interest. even after together we grow our common interest together. hobbies likes and dislikes, thinking, principles.. we grow tgt. until today we are both 27, we have been thrgouh a lot of happy and sad. especially we are both very different personality. he came from a super wealthy family and he is extremely smart in business, a typical business man who thinks very logically high EQ and very good in emotional controls. where else for me i grew up with single parent and at the age of 13 my only mom left me too. so my bf supported me financially and emotionally all these while. so as i grow older, especially the last 2-3 years i have been quite a negative person unlike last time. I always complaint to him about my stress, i thought i was sharing them but i guess i have put a lot of stress to him, my mom became problematic too and he always solve the problem for me. and i didn’t realise that he too would have his stress and he is someone who keep all the stress and negative to himself. only after break up and i reflected that the recent 1-2 years i didn’t do a good job as a gf.. theres a period of time about 6 months i was even in doubt if he is the guy iwanna end up with. i have done childish behaviour too to gain his attention by going out and close with other guy. but very soon when i figure everything out i love him more than before. but just after a few months he met another girl during business trip and they are affectionate about each other. and i found out they were sky ping during the count down and thats when he said break up because he is no longer perfect for me. (we are both each other’s first love) and he said its not about the girl, its about him and I’m perfect too good for him. he realise that he just don love me as much as last time.. and he don wanna drag anymore.. cause it will hurt me more … and he said he knows the feeling of he love someone more than someone love him.. he don want me to be like him before.. and he said like maybe we are not meant to be.. maybe all these while we are not ourselves. I cried badly and beg him twice.. but very soon i calm myself down.. i told myself i need to wort things out. .so i found a new way we both stay connected, i joke with him, we carry on our meet up on weekends after work and stay tgt. i wear the clothes he likes, do all the things that he likes, including showering tgt and chat about work and having sex. and he was treating me really nice, he even take photos of me when he don even do it in the past, he hold my hands all the time, he blow my hair for me. he just became very nice. I thought it could be out of guilt, could be trying to make himself feel better because he told me he couldn’t believe he hurt me like this.. and he is really sorry about it. i ask is he still very crazy for the girl now since they meet up a few times when he fly over to find her telling me its business but actually meeting her.. he told me it was a very nice feeling that he don know how to describe not maybe not so crazy now (thats after we spend 3 weekends tgt n me trying my best to act theres nothing happen) he told me he is very impressed by me and he feels I’m very smart.. i don understand what he mean.. he probably mean that he can’t believe that instead of begging and crying i choose to stay close with him as a soulmate. I know losing him is like losing my family, my soulmate, my best friend, my life time partner, my love actually my everything. i will really do all i can to get him back.. many advice me to not contact him for 1-2 months and let him think about it on his own… thats why i chose to fly back taiwan for the moment… when at the airport when we parted, he tear too… although he was trying not to… he told me let the nature take its course, he said ask me to go find my happiness be myself.. i have been too restricted living with him and his family all these years.. he heard from my friend that i said even if one day he realise he love me, with his high ego he will not come back for me. he told me at the airport that he will not let his ego take over him.. i cried v bad.. and he just keep holding my hand and hug me… and he said to tell him I’m safe when i land.. i pass him a long letter of our happy time spend tgt… some good momeories in the letter.. he showed happy when he receive it… he said he will read it slowly… and seems like he will treasure it..
at the 2nd weekend after broke up.. i found out that he and the girl still very loving even though i have been trying my best to act like a soulmate.. so thats why i decided to let go that moment.. when he hold my hand, i let go, i said don need to hold my hand since your heart has someone else… and he was very affected.. he actually went out of the house at night and missing for a few hours.. at 5am, me and his mom were worried, so i called him and he picked up said he fell asleep in the car now he is coming back.. so when he came back i told him, only if i let go, then they can be tgt isn’t it.. and he just hold my hand and ask to let me hug from the back and say “its not like that” the 3rd weekend which was our last weekend spend tgt.. he kept a distance … i know so he don wanna give me false hope… but i tot it is the last few days… i will just hold his hands… grab the last moment… so we became the soulmate status again for the 2-3 days… we listen to the song we both loved and watch movie we both love.. we chat a lot… i hear about him a lot.. even when i didn’t initiate goodnight kiss he will do it as how it is always done 5 kisses , and he will hug me to sleep… we will shower together.. like treasuring the last moment… when i am back to taiwan..on the first day he reply my texts w more emotions.. asking me to take photo show him my place here etc.. but his bro in law ask me to stop contacting from then… he talked about power shifting.. and if i continue chatting, i will give him a smooth transition for him and the girl.. and i will be in friend zone.. so i stopped..he called twice the next day.. but i didn’t pick up anymore.. so he stop calling and texting immediately too.. one week later, he receive a dvd develop that i couldn’t collect in time that has our footage many years back in secondary school…he texted me sounding quite nice.. say that he received it but asking for my taiwan address so he could send me my stuff (i asked him to help before i left) and then he called me i didn’t ans.. so he texted again ask whats my taiwan number.. how come i haven off my taiwan number.. i didn’t reply.. and yesterday(after few days), his bro in law ask me to drop him a text reply that its better not to contact for now to give each other space.. and told him that i m feeling alright and will not do anything foolish .. and he replied saying that okay , and ask me to please take care of myself and anytime wanna share w him, he is here. and i didn’t reply anymore… i know its gonna be the start of no contact…
And actually I haven intiate any text or call for 1 week ever since I’m back in Taiwan. He always seem v calm n logical. People tell me before he wants a break up of course he already consider the part of losing U and he will move on.
do you have any advice ? i really want to get him back.. i have thought it through… we shared too much memories… common things.. its very hard for me to find someone else who knows me better than him.. someone else who give me the security like him do.. Can I salvage this?
admin
February 16, 2015 at 10:44 pm
Of course you can!
What have you tried so far in an attempt to get him back?
Emma
February 12, 2015 at 9:36 pm
Hi Chris, I dated this person a long time ago. Then we have had an on and off sexual relationship afterward. When I initiated contact with him this last time, we agreed no sex but when we met up he convinced me to have sex with him again… there is nothing romantic about it, or his affect, but I would like to either be friends or date. I have dated other men that I didn’t hit it off with but he hasn’t been with anyone but me for years. I’m am wondering what is going through this person’s head, he is very generous and gives gifts, but what I am undrstanding is that any interest in dating, or being friends with me without sexual encounters. Maybe I’m wrong? And if not how can I ask for one or the other?
admin
February 16, 2015 at 10:33 pm
Were you like FWB?
Jen
February 11, 2015 at 11:36 pm
Hi,
I am desperate. I was here a year ago when he first left, I did nc, he came back, but it took almost 6 months. We’re about 4 hours apart, which has made it hard. He’d promise to come, cancel, I’d get upset, he’d get pissed I was not more understanding, now after months of that, he’s out of no where stopped responding. I should’ve known to not act crazy and be a gnat, but too late. Can I get him back after it’s gone so bad?? Is he just not into me? Do you recommed 30 days nc or could I do 15?? I am so sad I messed it up. 🙁
admin
February 16, 2015 at 9:57 pm
30 days definitely.
It’s ok Jen… You are going to turn this around.
Jen
February 16, 2015 at 10:59 pm
Thank you so much for responding. I will do 30 than. I am SO worried he’s just done and won’t come back again. I texted so much when he stopped responding…I just couldn’t believe he was done AGAIN…thanks, Chris, your website helps me feel more in control and have some hope.
Kitty
February 11, 2015 at 2:37 am
My ex bf initial the break up and we have been in 2 weeks of nc and he did not contact me at all and seem like carrying on his life and meeting new girls and dating someone already. So is there still hope for getting back? Or I should just let it go… p.s. before the nc he got so pissed off and deleted my contact of his phone but after that I did text him and he did reply but my last msg was left without a reply from him and then on i started nc all the way. Btw is it appropriate to post happy photos and party photos of mine with my frds on fb? He got many frds that stalk me and tell him what I’m up to even an update of status they can make it sound like so bad on me. It’s insane his frd have negative view on me which I dunno why but they r those that bring him to meet new girls and slp ard so I dislike them and they dislike me lol!!
admin
February 11, 2015 at 2:11 pm
You haven’t even gotten to the actually getting him back part. Just be patient, finish out NC and then give it a try.
Kitty
February 11, 2015 at 2:39 am
But we have been in a 3 yrs relationship and he begged me to patch back 1 yr ago when I caught him flirting and hanky panky with a girl. Like literally really beg…but this time round he wants to break up cause he felt he has no freedom and maybe he is still young started earning more money and have more different exposure and changed his thinking..
Megan
February 10, 2015 at 8:09 pm
Hi Chris! My boyfriend and I of almost 3 years just broke up on Friday. It was a really shitty situation, I saw him not even a month ago since I’m away at college and he’s back at home, and he couldn’t even tell me on Friday that he loved me. He associates with people who are negative influences on his life, now that I’ve been gone. He said to me how much he missed hanging out with his friends, and ever since he started, he has been lying to me, he kissed another girl, he has been ignoring me. I haven’t spoke to him since Saturday. I don’t know what to do. We were not a perfect couple, we each had flaws. He lied to me a lot through out our relationship, never had a desire to change especially now that he’s associating with people whom have no interest of bettering themselves. We both have cheated in our relationship, but have gotten past and moved on. I worried constantly about him because he lied to me so much and I never could fully trust what he was telling me. He kept kissing me on Friday and he told me how beautiful I was and that he wanted to see other people, and the whole I’m not good enough for you, it’s not you it’s me, blah blah blah. So it was a really shitty ending. I want to make us work more than anything and so I haven’t had any contact with him since Saturday however any tips or anything? My ex was my everything, my other half, my best friend, and a part of my family in the sense that he went everywhere with us when we went places, even if it was just to the local grocery store, my brother (younger) looked up to him and thought of him as an older brother that he never had. Mind you, my ex is a senior in high school. I’m a freshman in college. I don’t understand why he just started to be like this, when 3 weeks ago he was not like this and you don’t just lose feelings for someone you’ve been with for almost 3 years in that short amount of time. Please help! I think a lot of it is his peer influences and they aren’t stopping him from his poor decisions. Two of his friends “Josh” and “Mike” were both present when my ex kissed another girl, and my ex told me he honestly never saw her before, and it was Josh’s friend from somewhere else, not from where me and my ex are from. My ex then proceeded to tell me that he did not stop it and was showing no remorse for anything. It was a shitty situation and Josh and Mike have huge influences on my ex’s decision making and him lying about it. Please help!!! *Names have been changed.*
admin
February 11, 2015 at 1:52 pm
Are you sure you want him back?
He seems immature and kind of like he doesn’t know how to properly treat a woman.
Megan
February 11, 2015 at 6:36 pm
I’m sure, it’s just we both have made mistakes and I’m willing to put everything in our past behind us and move forward together.
Megan
February 12, 2015 at 6:24 pm
I really want this to work, and I want him back in my life. Please help.
Maria
February 10, 2015 at 11:46 am
Dear Chris,
First of all I am sorry about my English I just started to study it a year ago, but I decided to try to write you a letter , because I really want to get back my ex boyfriend.
Our story is the next.
Our relationship was started 5 years ago and it’s ended in the end of 2014. I ’m 29 and he is going to be 29 the end of this week. We were at the same class in the primary school, after we finished the school we have’t met until class reunion. But few month latter we moved together and we had a happy 3 years, then he got fired from his job, so we decided that he should try his luck in London. He moved to England and I staid at home about 2000 km from him for a year. During that time we visited each other 3 times and we spoke a lot by skype, so I felt it’s going to work that way, than I moved to London. The next few month was ok. I started to look for a job, but I had no luck, than I got tense about the fact that I cannot get a job and I started to see something different emotions on his face, so sometimes I asked what’s wrong please tell me. For few month I didn’t get any respond but than he told me he’s afraid of that something has changed in his feelings, but he couldn’t tell me any more, so after that we tried to work out the problem, but now I can see that just I tried it, and he was a child as always. He always want to choose the easiest way and he also couldn’t say (ok let’s finish with this relationship) because he cannot even want to take any responsibility of any serious decisions. So I tried my best, I thought it was my best… we stayed together for another 8 month and I tried to speak to him but he never responded so I didn’t know what was working inside of him I just tried to guess and I was starting to support his carer which was worked well and soon he got better and better jobs, but the relationship was worse and because he could not say anything about what is going on inside of him I told him I cannot do this any more so if he is not going to say anything I will go home at that the end of the year which was about 3 weeks later, and I went home. The only thing he was able to say „Now he feel that it have to be this way” I could not understand why he can’t say any more straighter words. When I went home both of us know that I have no possibility at home to fined a job, to pay a rent alone, because of our country economic situation and I had no money at all… so I went home I was very said about the situation and I started to thinking as everybody does in the same situation I made some „deadly mistakes” I texted him once a week I asked him how is he. He always answered he is fine and that’s all. He asked me once how am I, but I know I should not tell him the truth, so I lied I am ok. After 3 weeks I asked him to call me and he did. I told him that I realized few things what I did wrong in our relationship and I really want to show him that I can change those and also I have no possibility to live a life at home because I can’t get a job, and I’m not able to pay for anything. We were talking about an hour and then he hardly said “ok I can come back but as a friend”, I said thank you because I really wanted him to see me that I can change and I hopped that he will see the change in me and therefore he will want me back and also I had no chance to live a life at home.
I borrow money from my parents and I came back as a friend I feel I really changed since I realized what did I wrong. I am happier. I can relax myself. Since then I leave him space, a lot of space, I let him to do anything and go anywhere without any questions. Sometimes he ask me “do I want to go with him”, and yes if he ask I go. For example we went out for a coffee and we were having a 2 hours chat in the coffee shop, I was asking him what is he doing now days, how is he doing in his job, and what about his hobbies, music etc. We were having that chat like friends and it was working. Since I came back I felt sometimes it can work this way but sometimes I feel it cannot, because it seems to be he is uncomfortable in the conversation looks like he is keeping things back. I came back about 3 weeks ago and we had few common program and a week ago before he went home for visiting his family we ha the first chat about our feelings to each other. Of course I love him but I don’t wanted to urge anything, so he told me that he don’t know he can ever think about us like we are in a relationship, but he is watching me and try to find out about the girl who came back because she is different. The next morning he went home and today afternoon he is going to came back during his holiday week we had no contact. I read your site yesterday and I fined it very useful. But in my situation I am not able to do the no contact part, because we live together we have got one double bed so we sleep in the same bed and we also share our friends because of the 5 years. It looks like I am going to get a job from the next week. What should I do? He is coming back this afternoon and I don’t know what to do? I really want him back. I hope you can give me some advice. Please help me.
Thank you,
Maria
admin
February 10, 2015 at 4:19 pm
Read this, it is more applicable to your situation with living together,
https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/how-to-handle-every-situation-during-the-no-contact-rule/
Diana
February 10, 2015 at 4:10 am
Hi Chris,
My ex-boyfriend recently broke up with me 2 weeks ago without any reason. Everything was great, we spent all of our time together, went to family parties, out with his friends, and always showed me love and affection. He never showed any signs of distance or aggression, bored or lack of love; he always wanted to do everything together. Since the day we met, it was like magic; we clicked right in and made plans for out future i.e. marriage, opening up a business, and promised to be together for eternity. A week before he broke with me, we had an argument because of his decision to join the navy and he decided that we take a break and think about things. I agreed but he did not contact me for the whole week of our “break” so I called him crying asking why was he ignoring me; we then agreed to meet up. We met up and he did not want to make eye contact with me and said he could not be with me, he liked me and wanted to with me but he did not want to hurt me. I asked if he was no longer attracted to me or if he had someone else to just confess and he said no, he really liked me but he just couldn’t be with me. He said he had a personal problem but refused to tell me although I asked about 100 times. (I believe he was physically abused as a child because everytime I ask him about his childhood he refused to tell me and when he tried telling me once before, he busted in tears but did not say a word.)I told him he needed psychological help to let it out but he refused, I think it’s his way to solve problems; by running away. I don’t know what else to do, he hasn’t contacted me for a week since he broke up with me. Can I get any advice, thanks!
admin
February 10, 2015 at 4:08 pm
You might want to read my article on ex boyfriend protecting themselves.
shalini
February 9, 2015 at 4:25 pm
Hi Cris,
I am following the no contact rule from last 6 days, however didn’t got any revert from my ex. We were in long distant happy relationship and were preparing for our marriage in 2014-15. On Jan 5 2015, he suddenly gave me the news that he can’t marry me as per him he loves me a lot but his parents are not ready for our inter-cast marriage and he can’t leave them alone so took a decision to leave me, He said he is guilty but cant do anything for me now. I did all the efforts that you said are dumb on your website for 15 days, I plead, cried talked to his sister, sent my parents to his house to meet his parents but nothing happened and finally on Jan 21, 2015, he said he is going to engage. On Jan 28th 2015, I text him that I want to talk to you as I was aware that he was in my city but he didn’t revert. On Jan 31st2015, when he returned to his place Dubai, he called me up and said he has move on and told everything about his past to his would be and he is planning to get married by Apr’15, I said ok, do as you wish and our 5 years long happy relationship got over completely.
On Feb 3, 2015, he sent a message on whatsapp. Hi,…How are you? I replied how about you, he said ok I said ok. Till today i.e. Feb 9, 2015 no talks. I don’t know what is happening there but I know that he has taken very impulsive decision however one thing always keep in my mind that he is very stubborn will not listen to me now.
We had a very happy time together even we were in long distant relationship(India –Dubai), but suddenly his mind got change and everything got ruined. I want him back because I know we both loves each other a lot. Do you think in this scenario when he is going to marry someone else, he can still be back?
admin
February 10, 2015 at 3:18 pm
Have you read my long distance post?
I think that would be more applicable to your situation.
shalini
February 18, 2015 at 7:33 am
Hi Chris,
I read almost all your post. Your post always gives me hope that he will be back one day. But million dollar question is when? He is getting married then still is there a chance? I am following NCR from last 15 days but just not got even a single text from him. It’s now one and half months he just not tried to look back to me after announcing the news of break up. It’s only I who is after him. In 5 yrs of relationship he always fought just because we unable to get enough time to talk now he don’t want to talk.
My end aim is to get married with him but now seems tough. I can see him online on Facebook or whatsapp but don’t know whether he is also missing me or not. There was a time when without seeing me he never sleep but now everything got reversed. His disheartened attitude killing me daily.
SB
March 10, 2015 at 6:32 pm
Hi Chris, my ex called me today but I didn’t picked up the call as I am still on NC then he dropped a msg that he wanted to talk to me once as he is in my city. What to do now? Should I call him back tomo? Should I ignore his msg? Unable to understand what to do, pls suggest.
admin
March 13, 2015 at 6:40 pm
Well, if you are in NC then you keep on ignoring him.
nikki
February 9, 2015 at 2:04 pm
Hi Chris,
I have been doing no contact for a week, this i started a week after the break-up in which I was trying to figure out what was going on. He still would not and has not communicated to explain why things ended except the obvious that he got jealous and did not like that I was speaking to another guy while we were at the lounge (even though all I was saying is I don’t understand you). His best friend just moved into my apartment two floors down and he has already stopped bu apartment twice but we haven’t brought my ex up. He just asked if I was going out or doing anything in which I wasn’t doing anything but sitting home drawing. His best friend moving in has made me uneasy because I have a fear of running into my ex while he is in this ignore me stage. I know that no contact is good but because he is older I am afraid that he will stop caring about me and all that we built and I have a fear that he just doesn’t care anymore. I have been trying to keep busy and do productive things since the break up. yes I know it is only my first official week of no contact but I guess because of the way he has responded and is age I am afraid the no contact will have no effect with him. Like i explained before our relationship has been great no arguments and we were happy all the way up until he got upset that night so I am hoping all of the good things we have experienced and good feelings we have had together doesn’t just fade away from him.
nikki
February 9, 2015 at 6:46 pm
Do you have any advice or suggestions? Am i doing this process correctly?
ticia
February 12, 2015 at 7:16 pm
Pliz stiil love my boyfriend and help me to get him back according to him he is saying he become scared of my love tht it was too much for him. What can I do pliz
admin
February 10, 2015 at 3:27 pm
Your looking good so far!
I have a podcast coming soon that might be extremely helpful for you.
sabrina
February 8, 2015 at 2:34 pm
hi chris!
well i have a couple of issues… first my ex boyfriend and i were together for almost 2 years. he brokeup with me over the phone! i was shatterd and hearbroken (he clais he broke up with me because he doesn’t love me anymore or miss me, my lack of presince isn’t felt so bye!!). part of me thinks there is more to it… so i sat around for like 3 weeks and broke. i texted him. it seemed from the way he answerd that he was done. it was all very cold. distant and think about your future and i wish you the best ! anyway i wanna know if it’s possible to get back with an individual that seems has already written you off as history. he also doesn’t post anything on facebook or had done anything with his profile (about our pictures..) we don’t have mutual friends or even hang out in the same city!
p.s i’m from israel so communicating iin a subtle manner is a bit more difficult ( in hebrew there are excplicit definition for female or male… you can’t say friend (it’s either a guy frind or a girl friend…)
i would love to hear you opinion.
it seemed like one minute we were partners, lovers and best friends. and then just puff goodbye.
we had also discusions about getting married and living together, he told me that i was his family now… (most of the future talk was inisiated by him! and even a week before he broke up with me he talked about a future with me.
what’s up with this dude?!?!
help!
and thanks!
sabrina
Hi Sabrina
February 9, 2015 at 7:58 pm
Hi Sabrina,
I’m from Israel, too.
לא רציתי לרשום רק בעברית כי אולי לא יפרסמו את זה.
גם אני וחבר שלי נפרדנו. אני שבורה ורוצה לדעת אם יש דרך לחזור. גם הגעתי לאתר הזה כי בעברית אין כלום. שקלתי לקנות את המדריך המפורסם באתר כאן אבל אני לא יודעת אם זה באמת יכול לעזור או אם בכלל זה בטוח ואמיתי ושלא גונבים את הכסף..
מה את חושבת?
חוץ מזה.. תהיי חזקה! יש עוד באותו מצב כמוך וגם אם לא נצליח להחזיר את הגבר שלנו אלינו אנחנו נהיה בסדר ונמצא את הבחור המתאים לנו:)
admin
February 10, 2015 at 3:34 pm
I used Google translate to translate this for myself.
I am sorry about the breakup.
Glad you like the site and if you aren’t interested in the guide then you can just take a look at the content.
sabrina
February 11, 2015 at 8:06 am
I did get the guide. again does it sound like i can get through to him?
has he written me off?
admin
February 11, 2015 at 2:17 pm
You can get through to him you just need to figure out the right approach.
admin
February 9, 2015 at 4:34 pm
I see, that is challenging to navigate.
Maybe he got scared of the commitment aspect?
sabrina
February 10, 2015 at 7:24 am
but has he really written me off?
is it possible to break through to him?
Golrokh
February 8, 2015 at 12:29 pm
Hi Chris what if his birth day involve in the 30 day nc????!
admin
February 9, 2015 at 4:28 pm
You ignore his birthday.
Anna
February 8, 2015 at 8:10 am
Hi,
I have sent him (remember the good times) message and he never replied its been 2 days for now, i don’t think he is very busy to text back as its the weekend in any case. what shall i do shall i forget about trying as he is not even willing to engage with me! and i cant jump to the jealousy part, because he is a very jealous person by nature and might backfire on me. also please note that he is a very hard to please person, not flexible at all. i say i send him one more message after 3 days supporting his exam and that is i guess the ball will be in his hands after?? what do you think?
admin
February 9, 2015 at 4:24 pm
Ok, well that text didn’t work.
Wait a few more days and try sending him another message.
Davia
February 8, 2015 at 6:34 am
Hi, my boyfriend just recently broke up with me. We’ve been in a relationship for over than 4 years. When we were on our third year, he also broke up with me and sort of dated another girl but came back, of course. I really want to try this NC thing bcs i still love him so bad 🙁 but he seemed very upset with me before the break up and i’m so scared that he’s leaving for good this time. What should i do?:( if i don’t show him that i love him, i’m afraid that he’d eventually just forget me.
Your advice would mean a lot. Thank you.
admin
February 9, 2015 at 4:23 pm
Go ahead and do NC!!
Amy
February 7, 2015 at 4:31 am
Hey Chris,
Quick question, after the NC period do you think it is wise for the first contact message to be as that you have described above and also to follow the message with asking whether we could meet up to get my stuff back from him?
Thanks!
admin
February 9, 2015 at 3:57 pm
I would do that in a few days (the asking for stuff back)
You are entitled to your stuff though. If there is something you absolutely need back then you can ask him though.
Amanda
February 6, 2015 at 6:28 pm
Hi! This guide has been super helpful in gaining perspective. My boyfriend of 3 years and I just broke up. We were in a long distance for the past 6 months since we attend different universities. I’m wondering if all that you say is relevant to a long distance relationship too? If we were to get back together there would still be a lot of long distance left which is incredibly difficult but to me its worth it! (for him it’s not as he stated that as a reason for breaking up with me). I’m heartbroken as this is my best friend, and we have been best friends long before we even started dating. How do I fix this? 🙁
admin
February 9, 2015 at 3:48 pm
Glad you enjoyed it. I actually posted an updated version of this guide here:
https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/how-to-get-your-ex-boyfriend-back-version-2-0/
sia sharma
February 6, 2015 at 12:54 pm
Hi
I had a beautiful relationship for 6 years. It was a long distance relationship but we were together 10 days every month or more.my boyfriend loved me and did everything to make me feel happpy n special then i moved to his city for 2 years, it was simply amazing days and due to my post graduation i had to leave the job and shift to another city. While i was studying i cudnt get to meet my boyfriend n i got attracted to some older man. I had no clue wad happened my boyfrend had gone to other country and dint gimme time.
He found out from some source About this in 2 months he was heart broken. I felt sorry to but forgave me. I was really happy n felt he truely loved me.
He had to leave for Japan for two months bcoz of work n when he comes back he tells me he had a living relationship with foreigner for 30 days n fell in love. I was heart broken n cudnt stand it. Started troubling him. N the distance grew n it has reached a state where he tells me he cant stop thinking about that girl and he doesnt feel the same for me anymore. I feel the love. But its not like before and once he wasdrunk n told me how he doest feel the same for me n cant stop thinking about her. I dunno this is revenge orhe loves her. I cant stop myself from reaching out to him coz i feel guilty for wad i did. I dont know wad to do. Pl recommend. We were about to get married n now everything is over. We were really happy together if this incidence dint happen. How can i work things out?
Melissa
February 5, 2015 at 7:12 pm
so my boyfriend broke up with me last year and when we got back together after a healthy no contact break he realized he messed up and that he just didn’t know how to handle the stress so he broke it off and just got rid of everything. we have been really great ever since. this time we were fighting about things recently and I was upset about something and he turned the argument on me saying that i do not trust him at all and what is a relationship without trust and I have started no contact for about 3 weeks now. last year he made it very obvious he was posting things on social media and deleted our photos from social media where this time, he hasn’t done any of that and I am afraid he really is done this time since it seems like he is taking the “high road”. He has not deleted any photos, added any girls on social media he really is just off the radar almost. his friends say that he may just need time and i know he loved me i just wish I knew what was going on with him. what do you suggest?
admin
February 6, 2015 at 2:04 pm
Wow, he really just fell off the radar.
Well, believe it or not but that is not the worst thing. Imagine if he had gone out partying and sleeping with a bunch of girls (which I have seen.)
Melissa
February 6, 2015 at 9:21 pm
I mean that will probably happen soon enough he just is acting like he is “so happy”. His friends suggest he just needs time because last year he said he just didnt know what to do so he got rid of everything but obviously he regret that big time and came back. we have been fine ever since until a few minor fights recently. What do you suggest I do?
Kitty
February 6, 2015 at 6:56 pm
Hi I am having similar case. So if he reli go out party and slp with girls. Will they still come back after a while? I have been on nc for 2 weeks and he didn’t post anything on social net neither did he text or call me at all…. I’m worry he just carry on leaving the rs even after 30 days and by then is will be even too late to salvage the rs. What shd I do if I m having similar cases like this? I’m so lose I don’t know what I shd do but to ask for your advice chris. 🙂
Mary.
February 5, 2015 at 5:29 pm
Hey chris!
My boyfriend and I have been dating 6 months and we have had pretty much no problems. I live about an hour away so distance was a little difficult. On the 9th of January, he went to a party and got drunk and there was a girl there who was going around kissing everyone. She kissed him and he was too drunk to remember. on the 18th of January, his friend told him what happened and he called me crying. I forgave him but we didn’t get a chance to talk about it as the next time we saw each other was the 23rd which was my birthday. we talked about it a little bit about the party and often planned our future. he then gave me a promise ring on the 23rd saying he wants to spend the rest of his life with me. I accepted but then on the 27th he texted me saying he’s confused about the future and everything that is going on and hasn’t been sleeping well. We didn’t really have a chance to talk about our relationship because I was giving him space and trying to help him figure stuff out. On the 29th he flew to Nova Scotia for the weekend and we didn’t really talk because he was with his family. We did talk on the phone briefly when he said he might want to see other people and I said we should talk on Saturday the 7th when he gets back. While he was away I wrote him a letter and dropped it off at his house. The letter basically said I want us to work through this and my feelings and that we can make it work. I met with some of his friends and they said that he isn’t acting like himself or who he is. they’ve known him his entire life and they told me they don’t know what’s going on and that he isn’t being who he is. He got back on Monday but still wasn’t talking to me. I texted him the 4th asking when we were meeting this upcoming weekend and how he was doing. He seemed really distant and not himself. I asked him if he got my letter and he said he did. He also was acting slightly egotistical. I found out today that he unfollowed me on my blog and I asked him why he did and he said he did this because it was filling his feed. I don’t want to lose him. please tell me what to do for the weekend. I don’t want to end our relationship as this is our first little spat we’ve had. I want us to work through this and stay together. If he decides to break up I will begin NC and continue to post pictures of me being happy and living life on social media. I just need you to tell me what to do for Saturday the 7th. Please help me.
admin
February 6, 2015 at 2:01 pm
Well things aren’t looking good.
If the two of you do end the relationship you should go into NC.
Also, what is your blog?
As a fellow webmaster I am interested!
Mary.
February 6, 2015 at 2:34 pm
Hey Chris,
my blog is a fitness and mental health awareness blog. I struggled with eating disorders when I was younger. I know if we end things I will go into NC but I don’t know what to do for tomorrow. Could you give me some advice? How to act, what to wear, what to say, what not to say, do I bring up any memories (happy ones). what should I do?
could you please give me some advice?
thanks,
Mary.
admin
February 9, 2015 at 3:38 pm
Very cool Mary!
Ok, what specific situation would you like to know these things in?
Kitty
February 5, 2015 at 3:45 pm
Hi Chris, I have a question if currently I’m at the 2nd week of the nc period and valentine day is coming so shd i wish his happy valentine day on the day itself if it has not reaches 30 days of nc period. I do not know is it appropriate to text him that? Please kindly advise 🙂
admin
February 6, 2015 at 1:54 pm
Nope… you shouldnt break NC for anything.
neesa
February 5, 2015 at 1:48 pm
Hi my boyfriend broke up with me. He thinks im getting married forced by my parents. But which isnt the case as am nit going ahead with it. Also i kind of made him jealous by talking about another guy when i was in a realtionship with him. So i owed up and said it was a lie to see if you know me very well. I did apologize by a text. Now we havent had any communication. He is using whatsapp alot now ive got a new picture and new style up. What do i do next ?