How To Get Your Ex Back When He's Moved On To A New Girl

3,819 thoughts on “Has He Moved On? How To Get Him Back If He Has A Girlfriend”

Natalia

September 22, 2013 at 11:06 pm

We’ve been friends since high school. He is from Michigan and Im from Texas. In 2010, he came to visit for a week, we fell for each other, I also went to see him for a week. However, after 6 months of dating long distance, I end it because I did not want to get hurt. During 2011 this guy made several trips to my hometown for business, pleasure, etc. who knows? I would occasionally receive a text, or card to tell me he was in town. Confused, I politely responded with the typical how is life, hope you have fun, etc. He never initiated an invitation and neither did I. Late 2012, I get a random call from him saying he got a huge promotion and he will be moving to my hometown within a month. I was very surprised and a little confused to hear from him so out of the blue!

He got a hotel near where I live, tells me he is looking to buy a house, calls me to get my input on certain neighborhoods he is looking at, etc. He did ask me about whether I was dating anyone, my family, etc. He volunteers that his last serious relationship ended in early 2009 and in 2012, he had been seeing three girls, (not at the same time), all three had been friends from college. I said good for you as long as their good quality women and not desperate. He described girl 1 as an airhead, girl 2 as needy, girl 3 as divorced. He said their probably desperate but that the divorced woman had a good job. He attempts to invite me out, I believe it was a car show. I declined as I had other plans. He later posts on FB he has no plans for Thanksgiving, so I wait a few days and ask whether he would like to join me and my family for thanksgiving. He said his boss had already asked him to join him so he would let me know. Well, time goes by he never calls to let me know. I don’t hear from him until New Years day, he sends me a message on FB saying that a realtor by the name of blank and that I knew kept on texting him to buy a house and to please make it stop. I apologized and said I would take care of it. I have no idea what his deal is but I just go on with my life.

Mid January I see a post from the divorced girl that she was in Orlando for the weekend, he deletes her post from his wall but I notice her profile is public so I see pics of them hanging out together. His private life is none of my business so I let it be. My bday comes up and sends me his best wishes on FB. I tried to be a bit more friendly on FB but somehow felt he was using me to play games with the other chicks on his FB. Six months later the divorced girl came back to visit him for the weekend. Again, no posts on his wall but saw pics on her wall. From what I see from her demeanor is a crude, outgoing, and more to love party girl.

With all honesty, I admit I still have a soft spot for him and wonder why did he contact me after all this years to tell me he moved to my hometown, reach out to end all contact. Anyhow needless to say, FB stalking is not for me, It’s been 3 months since I unfriended him from my FB. One of many wise decisions I have made this year. Life is too short and precious to wonder…I choose to live it.

admin

September 24, 2013 at 2:03 am

Hey cool! I am from Texas too.

So, do you have something you were specifically needing my help on? I read your comment and couldn’t find anything that you wanted my perspective on.

What’s your goal? Do you want him back or were you just venting?

jannie

September 22, 2013 at 2:41 pm

I and my ex bf had broke up 2 times. The last time is just 1 year ago. But then, after 3 months of trying to make up, i got him back. however, we only had 2-3 months of happiness. Than he acted as “take for granted”….. he hang out with more friends, share his life with them and contact nothing to me. Then i can’t stand with that behavior and ask him to end our relationship. After 1 month, i miss him so much and text some messages to him but he didn’t answer. Then, 1 months later ( 2 months after we broke up) i start to chatting with him (very rarely) he chat very politely as use to do. Last Friday (more than 3 month after we break up), i sms him at 12pm but he didnt answer and today he set “in relationship” on FB………….. i lost my control today and text to him too much……….So what can i do to cover this bad situation

admin

September 22, 2013 at 11:21 pm

Definitely enter into the NC rule. You need to distance yourself from those texts.
jannie

September 23, 2013 at 5:16 am

Yesterday, i chat with him about our situation. this conversation was very positive: ta lk about his new relationship, when he realized that we can keep our friendship, he start to talk about common thinks, remind me about what i said…..
I feel very confused…… should i apply NC rule…..AGAIN….. or keep talking to him as a friend!!!
admin

September 24, 2013 at 2:24 am

What do you think is best for your stiatuion?

Edalia

September 22, 2013 at 1:19 pm

I broke up with my bf after 7 years in may because of immature things but we continued to act and do all the things couples do. In july we had a big fight because i took his phone and looked through it because thats how i caught msgs in the past but there was nothin there this time. He got a new gf at the end of aug and when i asked him how he moved on so quickly he made it clear that i broke up with him since may and just because we were doing things still didnt mean we got back together. What should i do now? Is this a rebound? To me, the big fight in july is what ended things, not when i said lets be friends in may

admin

September 22, 2013 at 11:12 pm

Have you read my Rebound page?
Lanisha

September 25, 2013 at 4:36 pm

I have but im still confused as to when we broke up because i thought we had gotten back together but apparently not he says

Anna

September 21, 2013 at 9:30 pm

So this guy has broken my heart three times and i. Still in love with him. The first time he did, he got back with an ex, and talked to me later on behind her back, then she dumped him and he came to me, later on he told me he had lost feelings because he liked another girl, and then later after that got a different gf and that is his present gf. And i did the no contact rule for about 3 months. Then my friend accidentally texted him on my phone but meant to click on a different name and i told him it was a mistake but he said dont go….he was drunk….and this was a couple months ago. Then he started telling me about issues he was having with his gf and how hes sad because she says mean stuff to him (ive seen screen shots of the texts) and we started talking again…behind his gfs back….but no physical contact. And then later on it turned out she found out and they broke up and i asked him if we would ever have a chance again and he said he wanted to be friends with benefits but that he cares about me…and he doesnt know what the future holds so he doesnt know if wed ever have a chance….but they got back together the next day and he hasnt talked to me since. Is he worth it? Could we have a chance?

admin

September 21, 2013 at 11:39 pm

Well, there is a chance you can get him back sure. BUT it looks like he won’t be long relationship material in my opinion.

Link

September 20, 2013 at 11:39 pm

CHRIS.

I’m sorry, I know I reached out to you on another page but… I implemented NC and kept with it per your suggestion. I’ve been making a point to do a lot of stuff for me, like cooking and bike riding every day. Anyway, I know my ex has been keeping tabs on me online, and last night, literally right after I closed my computer and went to bed, he FB messaged me. I didn’t even see it until today, and it was only a simple ‘Hi!’ so it’s easy to let it slide but… I don’t answer him, right? I started the NC because he said he was seeing someone and I was done being his girlfriend in everything but title. I still have two weeks to go before it’s 30 days though.

admin

September 21, 2013 at 11:08 pm

Yea, you are not supposed to respond to him.
Link

September 22, 2013 at 3:30 pm

Okay. I’ve kept with that, but he’s been stepping it up. He messages me every night now. Last night he went hard body at it: his FB messages started with ‘Hi!’ and then and hour later went to asking how it was visiting my mom (which I am right now), and THEN (because I ignored) he went and TEXTED me a photo of the video game he was playing at the time… one he KNEW I was dying to play. He even had to stand in line with me at NYC Comic Con last year holding my stuff while I played the demo. I’m super tempted to remind him of how fun that was, but I left it anyway. Ignoring his hard efforts won’t discourage him, right?
admin

September 22, 2013 at 11:23 pm

Comic Con, I have always wanted to go.

It could discourage him. That is where your grasp of the situation and knowledge of him comes in play. You know him better than I do so always trust your gut.
Link

September 23, 2013 at 1:39 am

Comic Con is fun once you fight through the crowds!

Okay, so I did reply to his text about the video game just now and he answered immediately. He even sent a follow up text when I decided to be “done” with the exchange, repeating the question about how it’s going at my moms. He even added that he’s been looking at all the photos I’ve been posting of the things I’ve been doing in my mom’s city.

I’m very wary because he hasn’t told me he’s stopped seeing that girl or made his intentions clear and I don’t want him to think that one or two nice texts just clear the slate and win me back into whatever “friend” status he wants. Would it be hurtful to the situation to be a little sarcastic or should I just pull back again? He’s being ridiculously eager. (And he says he has no feelings. Yeah right.)
admin

September 24, 2013 at 2:11 am

Haha I think it could hurt the situation if you are too sarcastic. I was talking to a girl today that was way too sarcastic to me and it just really got on my nerves and made me not want to talk to her again.

C

September 20, 2013 at 4:22 pm

Essentially, about three weeks ago, the guy I was with for 10 and a half months ended things over text. We unfortunately had to be long distance for most of the time as I left campus for a term and do not live in the same state as where our school is located/where he lives. He is now dating a girl from his hometown who is younger (we attend the same school). He has not attempted contact with me at all. Apparently, he started dating her three weeks before he ended things with me. And she looks like a cheap, knock off version of me. I just want to know if it’s possible to get him back and how to do that?

admin

September 20, 2013 at 9:23 pm

Sounds like a rebound to me.

Shans

September 20, 2013 at 1:25 pm

Hi, my boyfriend and i broke up after 8 years because he said the relationship felt dead a d he was tired of trying. He found a new girl within a month and began dating her 2 weeks later. He told me that he didnt want a relationshio but he knows that if he stayed single we would have gotten back together and nothig would have changed. Can he really be interested in this girl? He also told me that we can be good friends. Do you think we have a chance at getting back together?

admin

September 20, 2013 at 9:16 pm

There is as long as you play your cards right.
Shans

September 20, 2013 at 10:58 pm

Ok so what should i do now? MC? We have a child together
admin

September 21, 2013 at 11:01 pm

Yes, do a variation of NC but you are allowed to break that NC if something with your child HAS to be discussed.

FriendlyQuotes

September 20, 2013 at 12:51 pm

Tried that. But after we broke up he went out and looked for a rebound. But they lasted 3 years. Whenever i see him he tells me that he still loves me but i can see that he also loves his girlfriend. I still love him so much since he’s my first. I want him back but i don’t know what to do. 🙁 Please help. 🙂

admin

September 20, 2013 at 9:15 pm

Well, you might benefit from this article:https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/the-definitive-guide-to-making-your-ex-boyfriend-love-you-again/

kluvd

September 20, 2013 at 2:41 am

Hello,
My ex and I dated for two years. We broke up a month ago. He started to date a co-worker a week later after our break up. He has not contacted me and I don’t him because I want to respect him and his girlfriend not cause any problems. Its been so long and I feel like I’ve lost any hope of him coming back. I’m have really hard time with his leaving. I read that I could kiss all my chances good bye if I said bad things about his new girlfriend and sadly I did but I apologized said I was upset because I was. Is there any hope for me?

admin

September 20, 2013 at 9:11 pm

If you go into NC mode for a month the bad things you said will lose some of their effect.
kluvd

September 20, 2013 at 9:28 pm

I haven’t said a word to him for two months. I dont want to get between him and Hus girlfriend just be respectful.
admin

September 21, 2013 at 11:00 pm

If that is the case lets focus on YOU then. What have you done during these two months to improve YOURSELF?
kluvd

October 11, 2013 at 7:20 pm

She said when she asks about me he either stops talking or gives her short answers. That they talk about school and their daily lives. A couple of people that knows what is going on said that their exes ignored them until they contacted them. She asked why he hated her and he said he didn’t and that he still had feeling for her but was with someone else during that time. They both kind of think that that’s whats happening since im the only ex girlfriend he actually is ignoring because he never ignore the others just me.
admin

October 13, 2013 at 8:08 pm

Sounds like he is thinking about you a lot…
kluvd

November 1, 2013 at 7:45 am

Well its been over three months he still has not said a word and I tried a few weeks ago but he avoids me. Then someone I don’t know posted a picture of him and his girlfriend on facebook. They look super happy. How am I going to ever get him back???? I am glad he is happy it just crushed me hard!
admin

November 1, 2013 at 6:45 pm

You are just going to have to be patient.
kluvd

October 10, 2013 at 7:42 am

Is it bad he still wont talk to me? Yet he will talk to one of my best friends. I knew this would be hard I feel hopeless yet I cant seem to give up, stop missing him, or even change my feelings for him. Ive been in love but not like what I am with him
admin

October 10, 2013 at 6:30 pm

I am not sure what to think. It is not great that he won’t talk to you but what does he usually talk about with your best friend? You?
kluvd

October 9, 2013 at 9:16 pm

Good. I found out that tried to help one my best friends. I sent him a text this morning saying I appreciate him helping her when I couldn’t. But he didn’t send anything back.
kluvd

October 8, 2013 at 9:19 pm

Be honest I never really was the best girlfriend. I mean I really tried to be and a lot of people said I was an amazing girlfriend to him. We did break up one more time or a few months because at the time it was to much and we wanted to focus on school. He came back cause he missed me and said nothing he did could get me out of his head. Does that change or make things harder for this time?
admin

October 9, 2013 at 2:21 am

It does create some headwind especially if he thinks you werent the best but it still should be ok.
kluvd

October 1, 2013 at 4:49 am

I agree. I care a lot about him and that’s why I feel like I should let their relationship be. Then I freak myself out with all the negatives. This first time after a fight or a break up had a couple that I just completely disappeared from his life.
admin

October 2, 2013 at 12:04 am

At this point focus on what matters and that is YOU! A lot of times I see an ex come back b/c he learns the new girl couldn’t quite live up to you.
kluvd

September 28, 2013 at 5:49 am

I worry a lot. I just panic because its been over two months and nothing. But I get things take time. But how much before you give up on someone you love and care about
admin

September 29, 2013 at 11:39 pm

That is a decision that you have to make for yourself. But my theory is that you should try everything (in a smart way) before you give up.
kluvd

September 28, 2013 at 4:53 am

I do realize that. I just have hard days when I’m not busy. I really appreciate your help.
admin

September 29, 2013 at 11:29 pm

That is what I am here for!

Just realize everyone has hard days but the fact that you are reaching out for help/advice is a really smart move on your part.
kluvd

September 27, 2013 at 7:46 pm

I’m just doing general. I not into the whole school thing but I decided to give it a shot and graduate. Only reason I want his relationship to run it curse without me bothering them because when I met her she seemed perfect for him and I do want him to be happy. Don’t get me wrong I miss him so much. Ill be honest because I feel like I have no hope of us working things out even though we did everything together. Is there even a chance him and I working things out
admin

September 28, 2013 at 3:33 am

Yes, but you have to realize it won’t happen overnight.
kluvd

September 22, 2013 at 5:56 am

I decide to finish my college degree which takes up most of my time. I also started to work out and been more helpful with me family.
admin

September 22, 2013 at 10:48 pm

What are you majoring in? I am just curious.
kluvd

September 20, 2013 at 5:29 pm

Sorry its been two months since the break up
admin

September 21, 2013 at 10:42 pm

And the two of you haven’t contacted eachother at all during that two months correct?
kluvd

September 22, 2013 at 7:51 am

We haven’t said one word for exactly two months
admin

September 22, 2013 at 10:53 pm

Not one word huh. Well, maybe it is time to break that silence streak.

faith

September 19, 2013 at 1:40 am

So I have a question. I have done active no contact since June. My ex called me once during that time and I ignored it. He kept calling me and I finally talked to him and he asked me a question about an apartment. We had a 30 second conversation and then I went back to NC a couple weeks later I sent a random text and we went back and forth and finally I asked him if he was seeing someone. He said yes and then he asked if I was and I said it didn’t matter but then said no and then he said he thought I was bc I had blown him off. I wished him luck and meant it. Then Sunday I get two calls and a couple of text saying he wish he had known I was single and then something ab focusing on new beginnings then he said he wanted to see me. I didn’t answer then I waited for a while and then said he should take some more time and make sure he knew what he wanted. He texted later and apologized and said he should not of contacted me bc he is seeing someone. I lost it at first. Did not attack the girl I was angry that he would even think I would play the other woman. Couple of days later I calmed down I wished him luck and told him that if she made him happy I was happy I meant that genuinely… I am wondering bc I freaked out first if I had lost any chance of reconcilation and is he missing me or am I the fall back girl…

admin

September 19, 2013 at 7:00 pm

It probably hurt your chances initially BUT with time your chances even out so I wouldn’t sweat it too much.
faith

September 27, 2013 at 3:38 am

But still wait 30 days?
admin

September 28, 2013 at 2:35 am

I think so.
faith

September 23, 2013 at 12:58 am

If I am correct about the time line maybe a little over a month
Faith

September 24, 2013 at 3:18 am

Do you think that makes them a rebound?
Faith

September 26, 2013 at 3:31 am

So I promise this is going to be my last question and then I am going to follow the book and let you know how it goes.

In our last conversation I told him to never contact me again unless he is single. A few days later I smoothed things over and left it on a good note for the most part.

Should I reach out to him after 30 days or if that time comes around should I give it more time if he is still with her?
admin

September 27, 2013 at 3:31 am

I think you should still reach out to him no matter what. There is no rule saying you can’t
faith

September 25, 2013 at 2:53 am

Well not my butt particular… You know what I mean 🙂
faith

September 25, 2013 at 2:50 am

So is that a yes to no contact at this point or should I keep my butt in the picture?
admin

September 26, 2013 at 2:32 am

Yes to NC!
admin

September 25, 2013 at 12:30 am

I think it improves the chances of them being one hah!
faith

September 24, 2013 at 10:54 pm

Oh my gosh I feel like a crack head trying to get a fix…. I keep checking to see if you responded. Its almost funny…. Who needs crack I got Chris;-)
admin

September 25, 2013 at 1:17 am

Call me Heisenberg! (please get that reference.)
faith

September 24, 2013 at 2:45 pm

I am wondering what to do now? I feel like I said before that NC is what I should be doing. After our last conversation I am wondering if there is no hope?
admin

September 25, 2013 at 12:59 am

There is always hope you just have to stop thinking so much about him haha.
Faith

September 23, 2013 at 10:56 pm

And by the way thank you… I am going to purchase the system this weekend. I have gone to a lot of places to get answers and all they seem to be about is money. I feel like you genuinly care about what is going on and helping people. That is rare. So even though I feel like you give ALL this amazing information I am still going to (for a lack of a better term) sow seed into what you are doing. Your blessing for sure.
Faith

September 23, 2013 at 11:01 pm

Scratch that I am getting it tonight… So as silly as this may sound I didnt look at the order part yet. The reason being? ALL the other sites that I have gone to have been 120.00 at the least and 250.00 at the most. When I saw that it was only 39.95 and no need for payment plan? Within the hour I will be purchasing… If your program is anything like your site and I dont know how anyone could not get their ex back or at least become stronger and more confident at the end… Thanks again 🙂
admin

September 24, 2013 at 3:00 am

Yea, I did my best to keep it affordable!

Thanks in advance for purchasing. I can’t tell you how much it means to me.

I promise you will get something out of it. You will feel empowered I am hoping!
faith

September 22, 2013 at 7:45 pm

I wonder as well if I messed up by saying don’t call me unless your single? I know if I stay in the picture my emotions are not strong enough to watch him with another woman and not react or be ok but I am wondering if I also shut the door completely bc of that statement? One of the challenges I have had in the past is restating what I have already said so contacting him seems counter productive.
admin

September 22, 2013 at 11:30 pm

Well, the truth is that you probably shouldn’t have said that but you already did so dwelling on it won’t help you any.
faith

September 19, 2013 at 1:48 am

In our conversation ab him texting me he told me he loved me and that he is not ruling out the future… I told him good luck with everything,he said the same, in the past I would panic if he said that bc I would of felt like it wad over and then I would go in text terrosim mode… This time I said appreciate that and a smiley face and then let it die. Wanted you to have all the details… 🙂
faith

September 21, 2013 at 3:39 pm

How could I have handled that differently? I wasnt mean.. I was however angry and let him know. In June is when we had last talked and he dated a girl from work and now whoever this is. I am wondering if there is hope or if this is a rebound? Obviously he is still thinking about me and we really did love each other and in my last text I reminised a little about how easy it was when we were together to plant a seed. I guess there is no way to really tell… I did tell him to not contact me again unless he was single
admin

September 21, 2013 at 11:30 pm

Have you read my Rebound page? That can give you some insight into if he is with a rebound or not.
Anika

September 22, 2013 at 11:53 am

So I read the rebound page and a lot of it makes sense but at the same time I am not sure how it applies to my situation.

I broke up with him in Feb due to me catching him in some lies.

We went back and fourth till June where we had one final arguement where he said he wanted to be single for a while to figure things out and get himself together. He lives with his mom and we were arguing a ton. Big surprise he was talking to another woman during that time actually before. That is when I went into what I like to call active no contact. Which means I took the focus off of him and put it on creating a better life for me. He stopped seeing that girl and recently started seeing whoever he is talking to now.

About a month ago he contacted me about doing something with an apartment. I did blow him off bc what he asked me to do was riduculas. We have not been together since Feb and you want me to co sign for an apartment while you are talking to someone else. Heck no. After that I went back into no contact.

Then we had the exchange where I sent him a random text saying hey I was just doing something and thought about you. How’s it going? I asked him if he is seeing someone he said yes and then he asked me if I was seeing anyone. First I said it did not matter bc hearing him say he was seeing someone stung for just a second.

Finally I said no I have been working on me and my life and honestly I have been to busy with school, being a mom, owning a personal training business and like you (Chris) I am not one of those woman who can jump from man to man. I am not wired that way. And then I wished him luck and said I hope if she makes him happy that it works out. And I mean that sincerely.

Back to No Contact I went and then he sent me the text last weekend saying he wished he had known I was single he would of come back to me. He really sounded confused. You know the statement I should be focusing on new beginnings.

For me here are my thoughts at this point. This is new for them so this is the honeymoon phase and the more I try to say why he should be with me the more I am pushing him towards her. So in my world its better to disappear again and let things play out for them the way they are suppoused to with no interference from me.

We do have a lot of good memories and were together for about a year and a half. Towards the end all we did was fight and I think that is what created the stress. Plus you know all those dont do this break up rules they have…. I did ALL of them. Not one of my most steler time periods in my life. But even with doing all of that with some time a part I can tell we both are remembering what was good about us and missing it.

So I read the rebound article and it indeed does sounds like a rebound relationship but when I look at your timeline at the end I am not sure what to make of it. I broke up with him in Feb but again we had gone back and fourth till June and then he reached back out in Aug and I blew him off. Not because I didnt want to talk to him but bc his motive seemed more like what he could get from me and not about reconcilling and no body has time for that.

So what are your thoughts? I feel like this situation could go either way. Which is true for anyone but seriously this looks like it is an on the fence type of thing.
admin

September 22, 2013 at 11:07 pm

It does sound like a rebound relationship from everything that you have said above.

How long have they been dating specifically?

Coco

September 19, 2013 at 1:28 am

My ex told me that he was falling in love with me and that I was one of his best friends. Less then a week later he started pulling away from. I thought he was just freaking out because it was the anniversary of his divorce. So He told me he needed space. I said that was fine. Since we were hanging out and staying over with each other everynight. The next thing I know I get a text from him breaking it off with the whole lets just be friends and I still care about you. I’m just not ready now line. Then the next day he’s in a relationship with someone new. A girl with a very risque background. It’s been a week now and I haven’t contacted him or his friends. I blocked everyone on facebook even her so I wouldn’t be tempted to look. Was this a bad idea? Did he just freak out about a true relationship and go running to a fake one? I want him back it hurts so bad. But I don’t want to look like a fool again.

admin

September 19, 2013 at 2:36 am

Yea, it is possible he freaked out and ran to this girl.

Have you read the rebound post?
Coco

September 19, 2013 at 2:47 am

Yes, I believe she is nothing but a rebound. I haven’t made contact with anyone he runs with in over a week. When he dumped me, I did ask him to bring me my things and put them in my mailbox. I told him we could be friends when I was ready and I would contact him when I was ready. I haven’t talked or texted him since. Is this a good thing?
admin

September 19, 2013 at 7:10 pm

Yes, you are supposed to go into NC mode.

Samantha

September 17, 2013 at 12:22 am

My ex well before my boyfriend had broken up with me and like 2 days later he was with someone else also that girl is the one who took my place as a flyer I’m in cheerleading and she took my boyfriend and he’s ok I guess but I hear things. Like she holds his hand. I have a class with him and and he holds my hand and looks at me what do I do I’m so confused??

admin

September 17, 2013 at 2:02 am

He is juggling the two of you it looks like haha.

Rachel

September 16, 2013 at 11:48 pm

Reading this page eased my pain, as it comes and goes since my boyfriend and I had a mutual break-up a few days longer than a month ago. I couldn’t relate to a couple things, one being the fact that you mentioned a rebound girlfriend. He started dating a girl about 2 or 3 weeks after we broke up. The thing is, the girl is one of his past ex’s. She has more significance than just some new rebound girl.
We broke up because he was moving on to start college this year, while i’m attending my last year of high school. He pretty much told me that he “wanted more out of a relationship” now that he’s having a whole new experience with college and everything. He told me he wants to be able to have fun and fit in with all his friends who have their girlfriends there with them. The thing is, we were a long distance couple and hadn’t actually met before.
We had dated for one year and one month via the computer and texting. Our relationship was amazing. It was great. We were so in love, and I still am in love with him. We text occasionally (1-2 times a week, because he’s very busy) and I have spoken to him about how I feel before. He told me he still cares about me a lot and he still misses me and still thinks about me, he just isn’t ready for any type of commitment. He told me he doesn’t want to grow up yet. He told me he’s stupid and he doesn’t want to think about the future. He pretty much summed up the fact that he doesn’t deserve me, yet he wishes he could be like me in terms of commitment and knowing what I want in my love life.
It’s funny though, because he says he wishes he could be like me, but of course he won’t change his ways, or his extremely popular lifestyle to become comitted to me. I told him we would meet in less than 7 months at the time we were breakin up, but he put it behind and said he just simply wasnt ready for the commitment.

I am still so in love with this guy. I check his twitter every single day. I want him back, but at the same time I don’t, knowing his commitment is off. I want to be with him though, because we were honestly perfect for eachother; it’s just the commitment part of it that prevents us. I don’t know if he’s worth waiting around for (probably not, if I don’t even know how long he will take to get his act together) or just moving on for now. I find it extremely difficult to even think about forgetting about the person you know you’re meant to be with. He’s still my everything… And that’s the problem.

admin

September 17, 2013 at 1:59 am

You might actually want to read the rest of my posts. TRUST ME you will find it fascinating.
Rachel

September 17, 2013 at 12:13 am

Forgot to mention that he’s only dating his ex because she’s attending the same college as him and it was likely just the most convenient and easy thing for him.

Also, I just saw your LDR guide and my situation just happens to fall under the category that you don’t even believe is a relationship. Just because I haven’t actually met him doesn’t mean I can’t have feelings for him and vice versa. I definately know he isn’t an Internet predator, and if it helps, we’ve voice skyped?

I understand if you can’t offer any comforting words, though. Thank you for this web page. Will likely be looking around it time to time.
admin

September 17, 2013 at 2:00 am

Really, you have never met him in person?

Rob

September 16, 2013 at 10:07 pm

My ex and I went out on a total of 4 dates over a 2 month time period, due to our conflicting schedules. Shortly before NYE, we had our 5th time meeting. I assumed it was going to be a date, but it was a meeting to gather the stuff that I left. As we cuddled, he indicated that he did not love me like I loved him. In June of this year, he told me he was dating a friend for 5 months and he mentioned the no contact rule. I do want him to be happy, but mainly with me.
Kelly

September 16, 2013 at 7:48 pm

Hey Chris,
I texted him the I need to tell you something text, and he responded with “ok, who is this?” like he had already deleted my number. So i waited an hour and sent the rest about the good luck. He didn’t say anything but sent a smiley face. I figured that was a neutral response but I was pretty happy with it. But then right after that he blocked me on facebook again. This is so depressing.

admin

September 17, 2013 at 1:40 am

Hmm…. Well, Facebook is Facebook. You have his number and you did make a little progress so focus on the positive. I would say wait about a week before you send something else. You are going to attempt to engage him in a conversation.
Kelly

September 16, 2013 at 8:23 pm

I think he’s just playing games; otherwise I know he would have just come out and said to leave him alone. He did that kind of stuff throughout our whole relationship. He’s kind of immature for his age, loves drama. Do you think I should try again in 2 weeks? How can you try to get a guy back when they think they have you wrapped around their finger? When he got my text he probably thought to himself, “Yeah, I knew she’d try to get back with me.”
admin

September 17, 2013 at 1:45 am

You get him wrapped around yours!

monica

September 16, 2013 at 3:56 pm

i and my boyfriend had a conflict, so with that he broke up with me saying he no longer wanted to associate with me anymore, i never knew he was interested in working out his marriage with another girl

admin

September 17, 2013 at 1:29 am

…… Your boyfriend is married?

ella

September 16, 2013 at 12:34 pm

hi my names ella and im recently going through a very tough break up! we have an 18month child together. we had alot of ups and downs but we have been through so much together. he comes round like checks my phone and things says he still loves me and nothing would give him greater pleasure than to come back and be a family i really cant make him out as he is still with her but still doing these things he also says that he regrets 95% of them two they also work together he doesnt see much of her as she works in an office and he is a workman out all the time i really am struggling and i could do with some answers anything!! please help!

admin

September 17, 2013 at 1:12 am

Hi Ella,

I am so sorry you are struggling :(.

Have you considered implementing a NC Rule?

Cristina

September 16, 2013 at 11:58 am

What about when you dated for over a year a guy in another relationship that has become companionship for the sake of kids involved? And in between guilt feelings towards her and his sense of duty towards her he never failed to say and show he loved you until you wanted him to tell her the truth, sort of ending it but never saying it was over?

admin

September 17, 2013 at 1:10 am

…. I swear to god I want to help you but I tried reading this three times and can’t make sense of it hahahahah.
Cristina

September 16, 2013 at 12:37 pm

PS: It was confusing what I wrote… basically I ended it because he seemed he wanted the cake to eat it. He kept saying he loved me, when I tried to go no contact he’d call (normally he would just text) and seek me, but then he also kept adducing the kids as the reason for which he wanted to stick to her. 3 weeks no contact, then he contact, he asks to meet… and we ended up in each other’s arms. I guess my huge mistake there was to believe he’d made clarity in his mind during those weeks, and give in too soon. This time, after he left for holidays all loved up promising to see each other as soon as back, he came back not willing to meet me other than during day time, saying that every time I’m near he can’t help but wanting to make love to me and he can’t do that because it feels awful towards her after. So I had either the choice of becoming a “friend” over night, taking crumbs of his time whenever he wished to give me any, or beat it. I chosen the second options, enough is enough. BUT he text back saying he loves me, he knows I don’t agree but hopes I understand and he would have been there for me whenever I wanted. Very mixed signals. I kept on my own guard up and refused to answer, giving in after 10 days (stupid me!). He replied basically saying (in a very, very round the bush way!!) that he’s convinced to do good. Adding he thinks of me all the time and signing with a kiss… now! Again mixed signals. I kept silent and I can see that he’s peeping online to check if am on or off (I know coz he enters/exits straight away each time I’m on!).
What can I understand by all this mess? Should I just move on? I already used the NC and failed because I gave so soon. I feel hopeless.
admin

September 17, 2013 at 1:17 am

How long exactly were you in NC though? Just 3 weeks?

Patricia

September 16, 2013 at 8:56 am

Help me please! So my boyfriend and I have broken up once already but we’ve been together for a year and a halt. I had a huge problem of always fighting with him and acting up all the time, and so we broke up. It’s been a month now and the whole time we have still been having sex. But now he’s talking to another girl and no longer going to me. Can I still get him back? How?

admin

September 17, 2013 at 1:02 am

Well, stop sleeping with him would be my first piece of advice.
Patricia

September 17, 2013 at 2:44 am

Well now he doesn’t come to me for that anymore I think he’s talking to other girls.. How can I lure him back in? And get him back while I love with him?
admin

September 18, 2013 at 2:50 am

https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/the-definitive-guide-to-making-your-ex-boyfriend-love-you-again/
Patricia

September 18, 2013 at 4:04 am

And it’s also hard because since we live together he’s still playful sometimes like he makes funny faces or tickles me or jokes around with me like we’ll be mean to eachother. But he makes it known that that’s all it ever will be…
admin

September 19, 2013 at 1:43 am

Yea I understand that. You might have to cut that off for a while. Show him that he doesn’t get to do that type of stuff with you until he can commit. There are consequences for breaking up with you.
Patricia

September 18, 2013 at 3:49 am

Thank you that opened my eyes, I really houldnt make it easy for him.. Buy how do I do all this? I live with him and he gives me rides everywhere!! And I take care of his sisters and his mom talks me a lot. So how do I do the no contact rule?
How can I even play the whole “get him to fall in love with me again?”
Sorry for all the questions/:
How can I be the ungrttable girl if I live with him and he may possibly be chasing one?
admin

September 19, 2013 at 1:39 am

If you want advice on becoming the Ungettable Girl I recommend you get Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO.

As for doing NC. Your situation is tricky. I guess you could try limited contact.
Patricia

September 16, 2013 at 9:02 am

Oh and I live with him!!!

Andrew

September 16, 2013 at 6:41 am

Well I’m not straight but gay my ex fiancé left me last Sunday after 3 years and a fight we are both 22, his new man only turned 20 on the 15th he stayed by this guys house and slept with him quick, then sent me a pic of them kissing this morning, now he called me cause they got into a fight, and today he called me crying, is it that it’s sinking into his head he made a mistake leaving me if I don’t text him he will either call me or text me or FaceTime me see he smashed my new car up August 19th and he was upset cause I had to leave the hospital but he also says I lonely care about myself, I’m trying like I ordered him a new ring and had it sent too him he doesn’t know about it yet but do u think he will leave this guy when he knows I can drive back up to him???

admin

September 17, 2013 at 1:04 am

Do you think the new guy is a rebound?
Andrew

September 17, 2013 at 3:15 pm

Well now I look over our phone website now I know the guys number the last time my ex talked to his new guy was Sunday, today I find out that he smashed my car up and that the state is going at him for the cost of my car cause he was driving it, but I think this guy is either a rebound or just a guy he left me for to upset me tho this new guy was never in a relationship, but this morning he called me telling that his new bf doesn’t care about him he only pays attention to his friends more than him
admin

September 18, 2013 at 3:32 am

Well, that is good for you right?

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