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The Complete Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back
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The Male Mind AFTER The No Contact Rule
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Cheyenne Davis
May 21, 2014 at 4:33 pm
My ex boyfriend and I dated for a year and a half. Then just before going to college he broke up with me and said I was the most rudest person. So I decided I’d better myself to not be so rude and we remained friends. I didn’t contact him as much because I loved him so much I just wanted to give him time to come back to see that I’ve changed. We ended up getting back together then I visited him because he wanted me to so bad and I confessed to him that during the period of us not being together I kissed someone else. He was angered and hurt, but we moved passed it. when he visited for Thanksgiving, he was telling me how he no longer loved me but then we talked and he said he’d always love me but he was just confused if I’d be with him after he broke up with me. So I suggested that we go back to being friends, so we did. Then I find out on a social network that he’s dating some girl. Then a month passes and he confesses thatvhe still loves me and wants to hopefully have a life with me. But I was scared he’d leave me again so I told him that I wasn’t ready. So we remained friends. He said he liked the girl but every time he was with her, he’d think about me. So he ended it. Then spring break came. My brother passed away and myvex was there for me. I did want him back when he first asked me but I just needed some time. And I planned to tell him I wanted him back but then one night another ex texted me and said was I still in love with them. He seen the message and asked to see my phone and I said no we aren’t in a relationship. Then I left. He said he didn’t want me back anymore because he felt hurt, used and neglected. So we remained friends. A few days ago, we hung out for the first time since that incident and we hugged then kissed on accident but didn’t stop. I felt like things were getting better. Until a few days later he says that he don’t really love me and to move on because he’s never coming back, and he only kissed me to see if there was something there and it wasn’t. So now he’s back with the girl he was with before. I texted him that he’s a liar and I fucking hate him. I felt so hurt and betrayed. But I am in love with him. Is there any hope? Is this girl even a rebound after he’s been with her before? Me and him have had our fair share of problems. My friends are saying move on I deserve better. But they don’t understand he’s the only guy that I have ever opened up to and I am the only girl he has told everything to. Help? Should I wait 30 days no contact or should I apologize for saying I hate him and then wait the 30 days? Or should I just learn to let go?
admin
May 22, 2014 at 3:41 pm
Why did he say you were the rudest person?
Eva
May 20, 2014 at 10:47 pm
Okay so my boyfriend of 3 and a half years and I broke up back in December because he found out that I had hooked up with another person when we were taking a break about 8 months prior to him finding out. He and I both wanted to talk through things and figure things out but we did not have much time for us to talk about it before I had to return back to school so we just had to end things. Less than a month later he starts dating a new girl and she makes him block me out of his life from everything (his phone, twitter, Facebook, everything). He has been dating her for about 4 months now and it appears that a lot of the time he just picked up their relationship where ours left off but I don’t know. Anyways so recently I have gotten back from school again and we have been secretly hanging out together. The first few times nothing happened but the couple after that we ended up kissing which led to sex. This is while he is still dating the other girl. A few days later he breaks up with his girlfriend and has me come over and spend the night. He also invited me to go spend time with his family the next day but then took it back because he didn’t want his family to ask a billion questions about why he’s hanging around me again so soon which is understandable. And then the day after that he came to my place and stayed the night, and we made breakfast together the next day. We have had so much fun together since I have been home and now him and his girl friend are broken up. However he has not texted me since before work the day after he spent the night. I’m just wondering what I need to do to get him to see that he still loves me, he has told me he still cares about me but he is just confused about what to do. I know he doesn’t want to hurt her but that’s just the kind of person he is, I don’t know what to do to show him that he still loves me. Give me some advice please!
admin
May 21, 2014 at 2:31 pm
He really doesn’t care about his current gf at all.. Plus no offense but he is not a very good guy if he is cheating on his gf.
katie
May 18, 2014 at 5:23 pm
I’ve been with this guy for 9 months in a relationship. I knew him before for 4 months , we haven’t met in those 4 monts , keeping it on facebook , daily talk and stuff. one day in the street a guy came talking to me , he looked younger so i had no problem talking to him then i told my boy friend about it , he was extremely jealous and he didn’t believe me when i said i was just bored , that’s why i talked to him . anyway , since that , everything went wrong and things got complicated . i didn’t know what to do and since that time i stopped talking to any guy i don’t know. then one day , i found out that hye has been talking to this girl and she was clearly under his charm so i got jealous and made a fight . at the end , i told him that i love him , he answered me with this “:)” with no i love you back sentence and he even desactivated his facebook account so i sent him a text and i told him that i’m breaking up with him. then , right away , i changed my mind but he refused to be with me again .. i was so upset , he told me to stay friends , i refused. then one day , he said he misses me so i thought he wants me back . i told him that i m gonna wait for him and that i love him , he said he used to love me and that i shouldn t wait for him so i deleted him from my facebook profile . iwas so hurt and didn t know what to do . i even wanted to suicide that night . anyway , after a while i asked him to be my friend again whith a hope too get him bach , he said yes after a lot of thoughts ! he was cold but then we started to be friends again . one day , he told me to leave him alone so i went away for 17 days trying this no contact method then i found that he s with a new girlfriend , the one we had a fight on and it killed me but i told him that i want him to be happy and i was crying .. i told him that thanks to him i knew incredable people and i thanked him but he thought i’m talking about a new guy i like while i was talking about one of his friends who’s also a friend of mine . he told me cruel stuff like be with him , i don’t care . i didn t answer , i closed that profile and i walked away but it’s killing me and nobody gets it. please help me
admin
May 20, 2014 at 9:01 pm
So, what about him make syou want him back?
Adeline
May 15, 2014 at 9:48 pm
I broke up with my ex boyfriend over two years ago we dated for about 2 years and we always kept in touch ,We were always in good terms. Our relationship had our ups and downs but honestly I was a terrible girlfriend . recently I found out he has a new girlfriend and I think hes happy , I personally think it would be really selfish of me to try and get him back but I saw him at a family reunion and I felt “butterflies ” I cant stop thinking about him and I cant help but to look through our old convos . Idk what to do !! any advice ?
admin
May 20, 2014 at 5:51 pm
How bad of a girlfriend where you exactly?
Adeline
May 21, 2014 at 10:02 pm
I cheated on him a twice and i would always deny it .. the only reason we broke up was because i couldnt stop feeling guilty for what i did .
admin
May 22, 2014 at 3:57 pm
Well, what caused you to cheat on him?
Adeline
May 22, 2014 at 11:42 pm
Being drunk .
tina
May 13, 2014 at 4:51 am
My ex and I were together for 7 years. We lived together at our parents house for a total of 5 years. We have never had an issue living with one another but our relationship in general was not the greatest, but what relationship is? So I felt I had lost myself in this whole process. I felt I invested all of me into him and us, and forgot about me as an individual. So I decided to go out on a limb and move out and into a guest house with my best friend, mind you I didn’t even move more than 1.5 miles away. Within a month I come to find out he’s been seeing someone. It crushed me and made me lose it cause our “space” was for soul searching and I felt he loved way too fast. He tried to come back a few times since but changed his mind every time. It was painful to be a part of but I still love him dearly. I miss not only him, but our doggy that I cannot take care of as I’d like, his family, and just about everything. I’ve been focusing on me, and dating but nothing seems to be truly healing me. What’s going in with him? He claims he’s over me, but still loves me, but can’t see me. I’m just lost and confused and wondering, what can I do? It’s been almost 6 months since I’ve moved out. He’s 25, and I’m 24. I just need some answers.
admin
May 13, 2014 at 5:03 pm
Why do you say your relationship wasn’t the greatest?
tina
May 16, 2014 at 7:01 am
I say that because no relationship is perfect. But there were lots of things we could have worked on but he wasn’t the greatest with communication so every time there was an argument he’d wanna move past it without fixing it necessarily.
tina
May 26, 2014 at 3:55 am
Am I gonna get some help here? 🙁
tina
May 13, 2014 at 4:53 am
He’s “moved” way to fast. Not loved.
Jodie
May 11, 2014 at 3:56 pm
My ex (24) broke up with me (20) about 3 weeks ago. We’d been together for about 9 months and for the most part had been ridiculously happy – I have a year left at uni and he was encouraging me to think about us moving in together ASAP, talking about ‘when’ we get engaged, the whole package. We were constantly in contact and both talked about how we’d never felt like this before.
Before we were together (we met when I worked at the same company as him for a few months), I know he used to go out a lot and got with a fair number of girls. However as soon as we were a couple he had no interest, all he wanted to do was spend time with me and the one time I practically made him spend time with his friends he ended up leaving early.
But, about 7-8 months in to our relationship, I received a text saying he’d become boring – he wanted to see his friends more. I thought this was a good thing – until he basically overnight spent every evening with them getting drunk and going out as often as he could. He began to lie, ignore and lose interest in me. I became panicky and upset a lot, we had fights which always resulted in him saying he was being silly and I was the best thing that ever happened to him. We broke up once for a few hours but when I went to get my stuff he was remorseful once more and we made up – he turned back into my perfect boyfriend and took me out for dinner and talked about the future again, and we slept together. The next night we spent together his friends were constantly messaging him to go out – he ignored them and again we slept together. However, a couple of days later he started being strange again and ended it via text – basically saying he was sorry but whenever he was with me he wanted to be with his friends and he was done with the relationship. This time when I got my stuff he was very distant – told me I was fantastic etc but he just wasn’t happy. I got upset and asked him (maybe verged on begged) to reconsider but he was just totally distanced from the situation.
I did start NC for 3 weeks and was doing okay – he did ask me how an exam went so I just replied with good and that was it. I blocked him on Facebook as I couldn’t stand the photos of him going out every night whilst I was stuck revising – but today a girl we both know (she works at the company we both did) was tagged in some photos of a night out. She’s 18 but he was all over her in them. I got really upset and broke NC by calling him from a hidden number and asked what he was doing. He basically asked me if I expected anything less of him, that he couldn’t believe we’d only been apart a few weeks as he’d been having so much fun and his life was none of my business. He admitted he’d got with her but refused to answer my question of if they were a couple now. I asked him if we could meet once my exams were over (this was something we’d talked about when breaking up) but he said there was no point and I was clinging on. He told me to stop sending him Snapchats – something I genuinely didn’t realise I had been since I thought deleting his number got rid of him on there too, so I haven’t been as NC as I thought. Basically, the phonecall ended with him saying he can do what he like and he just hung up on me. I messaged him a long message saying I know he’s hurting too blah blah then deleted all ways of contacting him.
All my friends and family are appalled at how he’s acting and are telling me I can do better etc – but none of them understand just how blissfully happy I was when things were good between us. We had a whole future planned out – I don’t understand how he could just change his mind just like that? He refers to himself as a commitment-phobe – sorry but do they talk about marriage and kids on a constant basis? This is the guy that stayed up all night when I was in a different city just to make sure I got back to my hotel okay after a concert.
He told me I was ‘different’ to all the other women he’d been with… was he just talking crap/using me? I’ve just been left so lost and confused, any advice would be much appreciated 🙂
admin
May 12, 2014 at 6:37 pm
Like I always tell everyone.
Take words out of the equation for a minute. Do his actions agree with his words?
Jodie
May 13, 2014 at 10:02 am
I think so, I mean before things turned weird he genuinely always went out of his way to do things for me… to the outside world he’s not a soppy person at all but always was with me, little gifts etc. As soon as he left the first thing he’d ask is when we were seeing each other again..
Louisa
May 10, 2014 at 2:11 pm
Hi,
My ex and I were together in a long-distance relationship for 1 year and a half and have known each other for 2 years and a half. We broke up 4 months ago mainly because of practical reasons but still had feelings for each other. He’s been with a new girl the moment we broke up and going on vacation with her next month.
We have been keeping in touch and texting even though I tried the no contact for a bit, I never finished it and we continued texting. I regret not having done no contact before.
My question is, would no contact now work after all this time and isn’t it strange to stop answering him when we’re on ‘ok-terms’?
Thank you.
admin
May 12, 2014 at 6:24 pm
It might be a little strange. If you are worried about it that much you can do limited contact.
Louisa
May 14, 2014 at 12:06 pm
Thank you for your reply 🙂
What do you mean by limited contact? Is it keeping my conversations over text or email shorter? Or contacting him less?
For now he’s been the one initiating contact and not me.
Thanks again.
admin
May 14, 2014 at 4:13 pm
No only talk to him if he talks to you first.
J
May 9, 2014 at 2:27 am
Chris, you don’t even know my pain!
Okay, so I’ve been on this site a couple of times. All at different stages of the break up process.
I managed 3 months and half before texting my ex boyfriend. Essentially, I text him wishing him and his new girlfriend (the ex before me!) luck. I am naturally devastated because he said it was over between them before we got together. Hmmmm.
Anyway, we ended on bad terms, and as far as I’m aware, he stood me up and ignored an email that I sent him asking him why he stood me up. So I sent him the text wishing him luck and it started by saying, ‘up until this point, I was hoping that we could work things out – even on a basic friendship level…’
He then responded, first time saying that ‘I made my choice when I ignored him, and treated him like a stranger’ – WHAT?
So I then messaged back, explaining what happened on my side, and now I’m awaiting a response from him.
My thing is that this is the first time in nearly 3/4 months that we are talking and he is implying that I ignored him, but in my reality, it was the other way around. I’m sure he got my texts and emails, so I wonder if he is just messing with me because he wants me to be begin he again.
Chris, do you know what though? I’m a strong believer of karma and I’m not about to try and steal my ex boyfriend away from his ex girlfriend (well not an ex really). So it’s like, (depending on his answer) I’m going to respond and essentially tell him that I love him, but that I don’t want to be in a love triangle like that.
What do you think?
admin
May 9, 2014 at 3:41 pm
What do I think about karma?
Not sure I buy in to it but I would sure love it if it existed.
marisol
May 8, 2014 at 11:13 pm
okay i was with this guy for a year. we move in together the last three months we were together . thing got complicated and i went to one of my guy friends for advice and he found out and though i was “talking ” to my guy friend we broke up and he went to another girl. we talk here and there but always end going back to the other girl will this still work if i follow these rules?
admin
May 9, 2014 at 3:34 pm
Yes… but look at the updated version of this guide.
NC again?
May 7, 2014 at 1:40 pm
Will no contact work again even if ive messed up many times by either not finishing it or messaging him to argue to get back together. Hes been flirting with this girl he took to prom ever since prom and when i found out an confornte him about it he told me she was just a friend who needed a daye. Now they are both completely flirting with each other and flaunting it ive been in my possibly 3rd try of NC and its been two weeks so far. What should i do?!
admin
May 7, 2014 at 3:53 pm
It can work again but it will be less effective.
NC NC NC
May 8, 2014 at 4:18 am
Then what should I do to be effective?
NC NC NC
May 9, 2014 at 12:46 pm
Ahhh im starting to get so worried that he maybe might like her… Please help. Right now i feel like maybe the grass is greener on the other side.. I love all the articles gou’ve made but its hars to know what to do when i’ve messed up a few times on no contact.
admin
May 9, 2014 at 3:44 pm
I understand. You are in one of the most painful situations but keep the focus on YOU and not him right now ok.
NC NC NC
May 10, 2014 at 2:59 pm
Lately i’ve gotten new clothes and posted a couple pictures with my guy best friend making my life seem fun and happy. But i keep thinking back to the picture kf him at prom with his arms around her waist and how she flirts with him to the point that everyone is shipping them together. Do you think that he could possibly like this girl? Or is it that she is a rebound? Because hes complained about how our dates got repetitive and the spark went out since when we got back together for three months it was mainly sexual things we did instead of bonding.
NC NC NC
May 18, 2014 at 5:15 am
So itd been 3 weeks of no contact so far. I recently posted up a picture of me winnin my tournament and he liked my picture right away on instagram. Whst do you think this means? Especially since im refusing to look through his instagram pictures but i noticed immediately that his instagram profile picture is one of him and that girl at prom. Is he just playing with me, trying to encourage me to move on or possibly trying to contact or reach out to me???
admin
May 20, 2014 at 8:53 pm
Is he dating the girl from prom officially?
NC NC NC
May 20, 2014 at 10:04 pm
I’m not sure because his family is on facebook so he can’t put it on facebook and I don’t want to stalk him to find out.
NC NC NC
May 23, 2014 at 5:57 am
So im thinking about reaching out to him this weekend but i dont know what to say!!
NC NC NC
May 10, 2014 at 4:04 am
Well im adding on two more weeks of completely no contacting him, not even looking at his facebook or checking if he checks me recent snapchats. But i just wonder like what can I do after that or while to just get him back since at times i turn insecure about him with this new girl.
jem
May 6, 2014 at 3:56 pm
I wrote on here before but didn’t get any answer so hoping can get one this time.
I will be breif as much as I can, me and my ex boyfriend broke up last August and he started seeing another girl about 6 weeks after we split, she was clearly a rebound. Me and him were still sleeping together for 2-3 months into their relationship cos he said he still did love me but he liked her and stuff, then she found out but stayed with him cos she didn’t believe it and they moved in together and got a 6 months lease on a flat. I didn’t speak to him for about 3-4 months at all and then he got in contact with me and said hes been unhappy for months and he made a mistake jumping into it and he wants out cos he’s so unhappy cos basically she is a physco, she hits him and just basically makes his life a living hell but he can’t get out of it as she is the joint on the tenancy and she would just refuse to pay and stuff. weve been sleeping together for the past couple of months now, while I’ve also been helping him through all the shit and been a friend to him, obviously there are still feelings their between us and he hasnt ruled us getting back together in the future, he says he knows he needs to leave her but it’s so hard and if it wasn;t for the flat he would of left by now. Im just fed up of him keep complaining about her and saying he’s gunna give her one more chance then he just goes back. I’m not really sure what to do because I do love him but this whole situation is stressing me out and getting me down, he has about 2 months left on the tenancy and i’m not really sure what to do cos talking about it and being a friend and giving him advice that he isn’t taking is hard! I dont know! 🙁 I dont know whether to wait or not!?
Bailey
May 2, 2014 at 5:48 pm
Hey.. I will try to sum this up..
My ex and I broke up officially in November (we had been having a rough patch for awhile). We dated for over a year and lived together. I am 23 and he turned 26 last week. We still talked a little bit at that time. He got me a really nice gift for Christmas and we hungout a few days after Christmas, we talked about getting back together.. A couple days later he completely changed and said we shouldn’t talk anymore. I became very needy and naggy and pushed him to being really hateful and he told me to never talk to him again. I listened and didn’t say much other than him getting the rest of his stuff from my apartment (we had lived together). We haven’t really talked since January. I found out last week that he has a new girlfriend. Is that a rebound? What do you think I should do? We have done NC for 3 months.
Trisha Sharma
April 30, 2014 at 2:41 pm
Hi.. i need your help.. I’ve been in a relationship witj a guy from past 2years 7 months… we had lots of good memories together… i mean we were considered the best couple in town.. we were so madly n deeply in love with each other that we could never think of splitting apart.. everything was great between us it was a perfect relationship..but now the conditions are totally different ..he’s totally changed.. i mean we had a fight over a stupid issue and he broke up with me on the 26th of march and he entered into a new relationship on 5april.. i mean wtf.. n now he has been with that girl for like 25 days.. n i am seriously shattered .. i did everything to restore our relationship.. but i failed.. i don’t know what to do cuz m deeply in love with this guy.. n i know that no other guy could ever take his place in my life.. m so deeply attached to him n i miss him like crazy.. it hurts me when he talks about that girl.. n it hurted me when he said that he can’t leave her cuz he likes her.. m so in love with him n i want to get him back.. plz help you can’t imagine as to what i am going ryt now.. help.. how do i get him back
admin
May 6, 2014 at 6:27 pm
Have you tried the no contact rule on him yet?
SkinnyDragon23
April 29, 2014 at 7:55 am
Okay, I am a sophomore in high school and so is my ex. He is a good kid, does not sleep around or anything, and so am I. It has been two years since we dated, and I have mostly had feelings for him since then, and I know for sure that he liked me a lot for a year after we dated, don’t know how long exactly. Being young and stupid, I wanted to go date super hot boys and whatnot, so was pretty much feeling that grass-is-greener-on-the-other-side sorta thing. But eventually I cooled down, and earlier this year I danced with my ex at a school dance and realized that I still have feelings for him and that things could go beautifully for us if I would just let them, and he showed interest in me too. But now he has a girlfriend… one who is super athletic, a junior, super involved in everything in our community and loved by all “I am somewhat more of an outsider than her, since I moved about 2 and a half years ago to this tiny close-knit farming community”, and has a 4.0. I feel intimidated by her because she is pretty much everything I wish I could be, and I can’t imagine why my ex would ever want to get back with me, even though he liked me for such a long time. I want to try to get him back, but my problems are 1. His girlfriend is perfect 2. I feel like one of those sneaky player girls that people hate for trying to steal a guy from another girl and 3. I don’t know if he likes me still. I do not have experience with serious dating, so I am nowhere near smooth or confident with romantic stuff, since most of my flings were just super casual and none were very meaningful or involved, but this certain boy just means a lot more to me and I miss that happiness that I felt when I was around him. Anyways, sorry for the long rambling. What can I try to do, if I should do anything, to get him back?
SkinnyDragon23
April 29, 2014 at 8:04 am
Sorry to add to that already long paragraph. When we were at the dance, he had a different girlfriend at the time that he hadn’t been dating for very long and even admitted to me that he missed me. So he has liked me for a long time, but like I said, I don’t know if he still does and we have had long periods of time where we just don’t talk to each other because we get busy with school. He hasn’t yet shown any signs of him still having feelings for me, but I haven’t tried to bring it up because I don’t want to cause trouble with his girlfriend.
admin
April 30, 2014 at 1:17 am
To me it just sounds like a normal 16 year old kid being all over the place. Have you frozen him out yet?
SkinnyDragon23
April 30, 2014 at 1:52 am
No, I haven’t.
mia hudo
April 29, 2014 at 7:46 am
Hey Chris,
I have been searching for so many “how to get your ex boyfriend back” articles on google and I came across your website last week and found it to be the most interesting one.
I thought I’d try to reach out to you here on facebook and maybe leave a comment on your website also as I know you must be so extremely busy with all the help you are trying to give us women.
I am in a really confusing place at the moment and I really need a guy’s perspective on it. You seem to know EXACTLY what’s going on.
My ex boyfriend and I broke up exactly 15 days ago, he broke it off. We were together exclusively for 9 months but have been together for a year and a half including the 9 months.
We had the perfect relationship, everybody seem to think so also.
We were different from each other, I was a studious type who is very focused in my studies and career and he was an athlete who didn’t take his study that seriously until he met me.
I couldn’t see it working for a long time and he was also a good friend of my ex (who had a very messy break up with me and still hates me to this day) and hence why we took so long to become exclusive. He convinced me at the end and I realised our differences are the things that made us work.
I have had very bad experiences with men in my life that had caused me to have a major trust issues. It was something that my ex knew of and have been totally supportive and patient about.
But for some reason, I had this thing in me where I could never see that he had put so so much effort into our relationship to make me believe that he loves me and wasn’t going anywhere. I seem to think that nothing or no one could ever be that perfect and something would go wrong.
This was a mindset that I had for the last 6 months of our relationship together.
It wasn’t fair on him and I realized that and I ended up asking for us to have a ‘time out’ a month before he broke up with me.
During the two weeks that we weren’t together, I realized a lot of things that went wrong and how terrible I had been to him. I slapped him twice after acted really irrationally towards him because I thought I was getting betrayed.
He said that he deserved it but I immediately explained that it didn’t matter if he deserved it, it wasn’t right and I would never ever want to hurt him like that. I meant every single word of it and had been trying to make it up to him ever since.
We got back together after two weeks and things were really good. I told him that I wanted to change, not for him but it was for my own sake. We never spoke about everything that went wrong in our relationship as we didn’t want to fight anymore and thought that we were over it. I was a bit worried about this at the start but eventually we started to talk about it one by one and things seem to be progressing.
I was trying so much to hold my emotions together because I didn’t want to lose and hurt him and there was a moment that I was sure that I was being unfairly treated because I couldn’t express my feelings as I used to.
He started to pick his mates a lot more over me and I was missing the affection and the thought of being the most important thing in his life.
I should mention that he had just been chosen to play for a national football team. I have always been scared that if he made it to this team that he would change as a person and leave me for another girl who was more suited to an athlete.
And I think this was why I freaked out and pushed him away.
We both have never slept with anyone and we were going to be each other’s first one.
We broke up after the weekend that we planned to do so.
We failed to go through that step as I was expecting a lot from him and he had a major test the next day.
I felt like he was crushing my dignity by ignoring my wish to be eased into the decision and he felt like he’s tried everything and just wanted to focus on his test and not worry about it.
I have begged and tried to convince him the next day that we just needed to talk about everything but he seem to have made up his mind the moment that he failed to do well in his test because of me.
We talked about everything with a third adult person being there.
He was persistent and said we didnt fit and he loved me but there was nothing in him to make him want to try again.
He said his heart wouldn’t be in it even if we tried to make us work one more time as we have tried to make us work way too many times and we failed to do so everytime. We have been unhappy for a while, well he has.
He cried in front of me when we broke up and I kept it together and made sure I didn’t cry and just talked and laughed with someone else. We shared a look before we left each other and didn’t speak after the break up.
We have planned a future together and I am absolutely devastated that I have lost such a great guy. I could never see something working as clearly as I have been with him and he was really my rock that kept me together.
During the 15 days that we have been broken up, I have realized that a lot of this break up was caused because of me.
I have became someone else and lost the person that he once was in love with.
I became clingy, controlling, demanding and very untrusting.
What he did was never enough, no matter how much he’s tried to show me.
I have not contacted him at all in this 15 days and tried my best to be okay and make it look like that I am okay especially on facebook.
He has asked his friends about me and how I am going. I am unsure with what they said but I am assuming they are saying that I was fine.
I have found out recently that he is moving on and he had been going out a lot and meeting new girls.
He was not one to talk to many girls but it seems like that he has been talking a lot with this one girl on facebook and snapchatting a lot.
I am scared that he’s going to fall in love with this new girl and forget everything about me and lose all interest in ever working it out with me again.
I don’t think I have ever sounded this desperate before in my life and it is killing me that I still want him this badly.
I have planned to do NC for a month and have been making positive changes in my life.
I got myself a haircut and a new look, join the gym and lose some weight and be a lot more involved with my friends and focus in uni again.
A guy had asked me out for this weekend which I will say yes to.
But I am still really struggling every day everytime I think of him and how happy he is at the moment.
What do you think I should do?
He has given me a second chance before and probably many chances during our relationship when I became unreasonable and irrational. He’s stuck it through with me a LOT. I feel as though I have completely lost my chances and there is NO WAY he would want to try again.
Is there such thing as a third chance?
I really hope to hear from you soon.
So sorry for my long message.
Thank you so much, what you are doing here for all of us women out here is amazing…!
admin
April 30, 2014 at 1:16 am
Hi there,
First off thanks for commenting!
Right now just focus on taking things one day at a time. You have the right mindset you really do. But just take it one day at a time.
moonlight
April 28, 2014 at 9:23 pm
HELP!!!!
I got a promotion and work and because we work for the same company he was bound to get the notification. I knew he would say something cause we are not bitter. In fact I’m only on a second no contact only because I got neutral responses from him after some very positive ones. His email in response to my promotion went like this….
“well well! Aren’t we making moves???? That’s great news!!CONGRATS SHORTY!!! ”
I responded to his email….All I said was “thank you…..”
What do you guys think? Any insight would help my anxious heart and mind. It’s been about 13 days since our last text. I’m thinking of going to ATB maybe later this week or early next…
I should mention the last I knew he was still with his girlfriend that he got less than a month after we split
admin
April 30, 2014 at 1:03 am
How long has he been with her for?
moonlight
May 1, 2014 at 12:30 am
Any further insight?
🙂
moonlight
April 30, 2014 at 3:09 am
About 9 months…. We’ve been split for about 10
Lissa
April 27, 2014 at 2:57 pm
I was dating this boy that i really like . We were doing good until he told me wanted to see other people . One of my friends that was also the that got us together . She ask him if he still like me . He said yes . But then he kiss her . And told her that somebody dare him to kiss her . . She kept trying to make me talk to him . Then i found out that he starded to go out with this girl. I got 2 question for u . One was he just playing with my feeling ? Two should i get him back because i still love him?
admin
April 28, 2014 at 4:22 pm
He was just telling you what you wanted to hear not to hurt you probably…
Lissa
April 28, 2014 at 11:51 pm
What???
rox
April 24, 2014 at 12:39 am
I would like to add here under this post Thank you for the considerable work you put into this ,you re doing a lot of good to humanity ! It s on top of any given value!
admin
April 24, 2014 at 4:09 pm
Thank you for saying that 🙂
Jasmine
April 23, 2014 at 4:17 pm
Me and my ex has been together for 5 years and we have 2 children together. He broke up with me about a month ago and never gave reasons why he left. Now he is seeing another girl and they have become really close.They work together so they are always seeing each other. He says people at work thinks they are a couple but he says they really aren’t and tgat she just thinks they are but he insist that they are just friends in my opinion they are friends with benefits and im having a difficult time dealing with this. He still tells he that he loves me but he just wants to focus on the kids but hasn’t been doing that because he’s been with her. I’m trying to figure out if I should still try for me and him because im in love with him and I want my family back on track but confused on what I should do from here. what steps should I take when children are involved because the no contact probably wont work so well.
admin
April 24, 2014 at 3:56 pm
Youll have to read this, https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/get-your-boyfriend-back-if-you-have-a-child-together/
rox
April 23, 2014 at 3:36 pm
I have been with my boyfriend in a long distance relationship since 1 year and a half. Since last summer things got more distant after also I didn ‘t succeed to transfer there with school.Now after he broke up with me I start thinking he might have had someone ,because he became more distant with me in general and in bed since end of last year. Plee answer to this:
How can I know if he had or has someone ?
He is thousands of miles away , I still talk to his father that doesn’t know anything. At the moment of our breakup his sister tried to contact me ,I answered but avoided to talk about him. I suppose she knows more about him , but now I tried to contact her on Easter via e mail and she did not respond.I did the NC even I communicated with his father twice during that time. His father knows that i miss gim and would like to get back.I even told him I would relocate to his place and I regret not doing that before. He told me he hasn’t spoken with him for few weeks and he didn’t know we split up. I e mailed once after the NC to remind him about some money he had to give me back , he didn’t respond,he just sent some of the money back. What should I do? I know I should go out meet people and maybe date.recently I had a bad event with school I lost my clinical placement and now i m not too happy.With dates it s not easy ,because I go out and get attached to people and then I feel my life gets too busy and involved. What do you advise me? Maybe I need to get involved hm?
admin
April 24, 2014 at 3:55 pm
How often did you two see each other in person?
Ho far away are you two from each other right now?
rox
April 25, 2014 at 8:44 pm
We are on two different coasts. I would go after him if we would get back together.I could transfer with school or take some online classes. I’m a nurse and I find easily work.After he decided to leave NC in March 2013 to live in California
We saw each other 3 times in spring after we drove together from NC to California ,each time I stayed a week.
Then we had a pause until September when we went on vacation to Europe for 2 weeks.
In October we met for few days in NY when he came with work.
Then we met in Florida in December for a week.He was with work also.
Then he came in February to visit for a week in NC.
Thank you for the considerable work you put into this ,you re doing a lot of good! It s on top of any given value!