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Lauren
March 24, 2015 at 3:10 am
Hi, Chris
Yesterday I composed what I thought was a good text to my ex, the first one after NC. I was so sure he would have answered by now, but it’s been 24 hours, and nada :/ .
I really want to at least be on speaking terms with him, since the breakup was more or less mutual, and did not end badly. We had tried to remain friends after breaking up, but I thought NC was a better way to go.
As much as I’d like to have him back in my life, I don’t want to be a text gnat, and I don’t want to appear desperate to get him back (because really, I am not).
Any advice? Or is it better to just cut my losses now?
I appreciate your help!
admin
March 25, 2015 at 8:05 pm
I would love to hear your text.
What did it say?
Maybe I can give you insight into what I think about it.
Lauren
March 25, 2015 at 11:49 pm
Sure! Thanks for your reply.
Just as a forewarning, this was one of those offline to online LDR relationships. We talked every day for three months before meeting up. Our first meeting kind of backfired. We decided we both had feelings for each other, but we weren’t sure how well the relationship would work. So, we agreed to take it back a step.
We didn’t have a lot of in-person memories to draw on, but we did have a TON of phone conversations. He was planning a trip to Philadelphia (my hometown) in March. I talked to him a lot about his trip, and sent him a lot of cool info about Philadelphia. We also spent some time talking about his trip meeting up. So, I thought that might be something positive that I could play off of for my text after NC.
“Hey, I was just planning my own trip home to Philadelphia in August. I remembered you were really excited about your trip to Philadelphia. I hope you had a great time!”
OK. Maybe not the best text I could have sent but I figured I was doing the best with what I had.
Thanks, Chris.
Diana
March 23, 2015 at 11:26 pm
Hi Chris,
I need your help..
Me and my ex were together for 3 years and I broke up with him last year. I had some issues I had to deal with myself and didn’t want to drag him into it. I broke his and my heart.
I tried to stop thinking about him but couldn’t, and so I sent a text, we talked and he said he doesn’t know what he wants, but maybe he’d like to try something with someone new. He also said I should try harder just as he did when he tried to win me and we’ll see where it leads. We talk now over chat pretty often but he did tell me that for now he doesn’t want anything but physical pleasure, and invited me home recently. One day he seems as warm as he was before and the other he is cold and careful with his words.
So should I go?
admin
March 25, 2015 at 7:59 pm
He sounds hot and cold to me.
Like he is having a battle in his head on his feelings.
Shannon
March 21, 2015 at 4:26 pm
Hi, I did comment briefly on another topic but would like to tell the whole story here and receive some feedback. I started dating a sweetheart 5 years ago soon after my divorce (married 23 years). Had known him for years and he was also divorced but his ex had died and he was a single dad to his 20 year old son. He also had been in and out of a relationship with the same girl for 8 years. We fell madly in love, moved in together and got engaged. Within a week of the engagement his now 23 year old son stated he was against the marriage, moved out of the house and told his father as long as he was with me he would not be part of his fathers life. Needless to say, this was extremely upsetting to me and I pushed ex constantly to resolve things between the three of us. My ex tends to avoid responsibility and just kept allowing the situation. His son was very angry and bought a gun. I suffer from PTSD and came unglued, constant fighting between us and at times things were broken. I had moved my entire life into his house and he now asked me to leave. I had to get another job, to get $, get an apartment and move out. I was devastated and heartbroken. Never in the months that followed did this man stay out of contact more than 2 weeks. If I didn’t contact him and tried to move on he would show up at my work, send me a present or show up with dinner. I was in a constant state of limbo and he would not recommit but constantly told me he loved me. I was making peace with the fact that at my age I was fine on my own. I had a long marriage, three beautiful adult children and an incredible love with him. I decided if we were done I would be alone. Tragically that very night his son was killed in a car accident. The unthinkable, I was immediately called to his side and stood by him through all the arrangements and held him for days. After two months he told me just because you helped me through this does not mean we are back together. He told me to leave him the f alone. I was crushed and a mess. It was at this point (1 1/2 years ago) I went away for three weeks to a facility, got clear and healthy. The day I got out he was standing there waiting. I told him my sobriety and health was my priority and he could NOT be part if my recovery if he continued to be part of the problem. He also refused to get therapy or counseling to deal with any if his loss. Over the next 9 months I became very strong, healthy, dated several other fellows and decided to buy a house. All through this time he continued to be there for me but always sending mixed signals. When I bought my new house I told him he could not be part of my next chapter unless he was all in. He helped me move and we really started a whole new set of memories and fell in love all over again. Everything has been really good. I noticed in January he seemed annoyed at EVERYTHING and everyone. My 18 year old son has Aspergers and anxiety and my BF engaged in a huge fight with him and I asked him to leave. A few weeks later he started screaming and cursing at me. I no contacted him and he showed up apologized. On Valentines Day he gave me a pretty pink key with hearts and said he wanted his house to be mine and we were together. The next day he became jaundice, went to the emergency room was in the hospital 10 days with a blocked liver. I visited him 7 out of the 10 days and he asked to recuperate at my house. The first day home(3 weeks ago) he asked me to move back in with him, told me he wanted us together for the rest of our lives. I was happy but guarded. I explained to him I just bought this house ,etc, I already lived there and maybe he should live here. Exactly one week later we went to his house and after an hour he asked me to leave saying he didn’t feel ready to have me there. I left and no contact for 5 days. When I called him to ask what the heck was going on, he replied we were DONE. No point it was never going to work out. He angrily listed a ton of reasons. He said my son spooks him ( how immature and hurtful) I leave dishes in the sink, I take too long to answer his texts, etc. needless to say I am a mess. Baffled! I think he my be bipolar. Who tells you they want to be together and a week later, over the phone cuts you out. I did go and talk with him, I think he is depressed, angry and needs his own help. After all my clawing my way back to positive health I am stronger and have gone no contact but I love this man. I let him back in my life, my bed and now he is GONE. I asked him if he was ok losing me forever and he said yes. Ii just can’t believe he would throw us away after how far we have come. I am not blameless, I do question his intentions and he said that is part of it he problem but I explained to him if we were truly committed my worries would be gone. So my question to all of you, do you thiink he really stopped loving me in a week. Was he just a fake? Using me for my kindness?bipolar?( other people that know him think it) I know I shouldn’t want this relationship but I love him for real. It’s been 5 days NC and I’m so hurt. Do you think he will call and at least apologize? If he does what do a I do? Lastly, throughout the whole 5 years he always said he absolutely loves me and last week when we said goodbye he didn’t say it. I said it and he said I’m not saying anything. I was crushed. Thanks for the advice. I love your site!
Shannon
March 24, 2015 at 4:15 pm
Hey does anyone have any feedback or opinions for me. It’s day 8 of no contact and I’m just feeling baffled by all of this, advice?
admin
March 31, 2015 at 6:44 pm
Hi Shannon, sorry for the late response.
I have been very overwhelmed with comments and inquiries.
Rose
March 21, 2015 at 10:52 am
Me and my ex boyfriend are both 20 years old. He split up with me because he said things weren’t the same anymore and he wants to be on his own because he’s busy with work. This went downhill from January. I implemented a few days here and there of no contact then sent him texts to get back together it was always me getting back in touch with him but when we got back together an argument over something stupid made him not want it anymore. I then applied 2 weeks of no contact and got back in touch with him and we went out for the day and had a good time. Then he never contacted me since we went out so I have been really trying lately initiating contact first but he will reply but just bluntly he won’t keep the conversation going. I met up with him the other night and stayed at his and we slept together and he was really nice with me and then the day after I text him and he replied but again not keeping the conversation going and then I rang him that night for a chat and he didn’t reply he said “what’s up? I’m busy x” and I said “nothing’s up just thought I’d ring you x” to which he didn’t reply! It’s like he’s avoiding me! I’m putting in so much work but he will only see me when he has nothing else on and never contacts me first so I feel like I’m flogging a dead horse. I asked him if we can still see each other and take things slow and he said can do but he’s liking being alone. What do I do?
admin
March 22, 2015 at 5:04 pm
Sometimes you have to work to gain that 50/50 split on text messaging. You should listen to my podcast on texting.
RACHAEL SILVESTRI
March 19, 2015 at 9:45 pm
Hi Chris
Need some advice about letting go of my ex boyfriend
OUR relationship started very fast right from the being
we dated he moved in 3months into our relationship.
I am in my earlier 40s he is 7 yrs younger than me. I have never fell so fast for someone he was so different from the other men i have dated but there was one problem he was an acholic
well i caught him cheating with someone at his job i called him out on it made sure his work and friends knew what he was doing we broke up . he went to rehab an can out a better man
so we stared to see each other again everything going ok
but he wasnt ready to talk about what happened between us
4 months go by he knew i wanted to have that talk we did he said he needs sometime to think things over.
give it time you never know what tomorrow may bring
what did he really mean when he said that??
should i just let him go?
admin
March 22, 2015 at 3:55 pm
I would check out my article on age gaps. I think that is perfectly suited for you.
Big age gap
March 18, 2015 at 3:25 am
We were together for 11 months; a very tumultuous relationship where I broke up with him 9 times and he broke up with me twice. It stemmed from my insecurity and wanting him to prove his love by acceding to my requests. For him he had abandonment issues; he would escalate the argument. When I wanted to sleep or cool down he would continue fighting and I would break up just so we could go and sleep. He even almost attempted suicide once because he was telling me and I was annoyed and thought it was emotional manipulation (that was horrible of me, I should’ve empathised and tried to stop him). There was a lot of negative baggage to the point that he lost all feelings for me. I begged him back at that point and the tables were turned, he became very demanding and had strict standards for me to be submissive (granted he just wanted me to stop arguing) but it seemed very transactiona/conditional and that he wouldn’t love me if I didn’t reach his standards. He wanted a dom/sub relationship where I satisfy his every whim or else he would withhold love…not healthy. I was in constant fear that he would leave me and tolerated his harshness. We patched for about 2 months and broke up on Valentine’s Day. During the in-between period before our patch, he admitted that I wasn’t abusive like how his first ex was, and that our connection was special. We had very high highs and very low lows. Now he’s casually dating another girl. And I’m struggling to decide if I should wait longer for him to experience more or give up (I don’t think I can even when I’m healing and open to dating). He’s 19 I’m 25. He’s mentioned before he’s looking for a long-term relationship that leads to marriage, and he needs a submissive, docile girl. He’s content with living in a small apartment while he works, while devoting a large part of his life to writing (not very lucrative). I’m fine with a simple life too, I just want a responsible man who would give me emotional stability and would pay for a house together. I love children and hope to have them one day, but would be happy as long as I have a companion till old age. He does not want kids as he’s cynical and doesn’t see a good reason to bring them into the world.
After our first big breakup, he had a huge crush on a girl he barely knew, I think it was a coping mechanism and he said she was a proxy for me, a fantasy of a perfect girlfriend hence he wouldn’t want to burst the bubble by knowing her (not sure how true is that). When we patched he mentioned that despite his sincere efforts to know her as a friend she didn’t respond and that I’m better because I would try harder than her. He also stated he loved me but wasn’t in love with me and asked me to help him fall in love with me again, also apologized that he put me in a weird situation of being a submissive.
After the second big breakup, he started going out with a girl who’s still attached. I’m guilty of stalking him as I have his passwords. He also alluded to sex but I cannot confirm if they’ve crossed that boundary. He said that we should take time off to heal and sort out our feelings. When I told him I’ll date to see if he’s special, he said ‘I think that’s a great idea ☺” and when I flared up that he’s so willing to let me go he said, “I just want you to be happy…” He said that if ever, we should start as friends and see if he falls in love with me organically. He also said he’s bored and can hang out with him anytime, and if I join his new company he’ll give me 50% stake, because he believes I’m capable and he’s bored and wants someone to bounce ideas off. I have a hunch that he does love me deep down, but there’s too much hurt to start on a clean slate and love each other properly. I’m also recently entertaining the thought that yes maybe he’s lost all feelings for me and just wants me as a back up friend in his routine. I’m in the middle of my NC now, and much as I want to stop myself from stalking him I cannot. How can he love or miss me when he’s involved with a new girl so soon?
I love him and want him to fulfill his dreams of being a published writer. I enjoy the aimless conversation, night walks, sharing music and new ideas, discussing about our businesses, complaining about things, the sex. I’m wondering if I should take a longer NC and let him experience other relationships while he undergoes 2 years of mandatory military training. Or should I slowly build trust again and win him back after NC. I know I can have better, in terms of men who are older and more emotionally and financially stable, but I love him and I’m sad that we added so much negative baggage. Should I be with him? Or should Iet him go for 1-2 years? If I see him happier with another girl…I may just give up.
Lastly, thank you for doing the work you do.
admin
March 18, 2015 at 9:24 pm
What do you think?
I think 30 days NC would be fine but if internally you want to stay in it longer than go ahead.
Big age gap
March 29, 2015 at 3:51 am
If he is currently texting a girl his age on fb writing things for her, typing winking emoticons, leaving private notes about her falling in love with him and they have common interests and a good connection, is there less of a chance to get back together with him? He’s an intj (logical, intuitive and methodical like you). If there was very bad fallout from the relationship and breakup, is it more strategic if I wait and work on myself first? Have you seen cases where the guy moves on to another relationship and the girl contacts him after 1-2 years and they still get back together? When do you think this would work out better than patching again a few months after a bad breakup?
Big age gap
March 29, 2015 at 3:53 am
I really hope you could reply. It’s hard to take my friends’ feedback because they are mostly girls and want me to stay away. I trust you and your feedback is really important to me. I feel I’m meant to be with him but it’s so important to me that I don’t mess it up again. :'(
Big age gap
March 19, 2015 at 7:01 am
I think that I still love him and value the connection and chemistry we had. I also see how we complement each other and how i learn to be more grounded and rational with him and be less self-centred, while he learns to be more sensitive (painstakingly slow and hurting me a lot in the process) but still holds resentment and pays back with the same selfish behaviour (no longer sweet and giving and accommodating but demanding and withholding love). He’s also at the age where he SAYS he wants a long term relationship that leads to marriage, but has emotional issues that makes him get casual sex to feel validated which I feel very very hurt about though we’re technically not in a rs.
I would really appreciate your feedback about boys and men. I’m mostly afraid of two things: that we would fight more and he cheats emotionally/physically AND not mature and want to get married/settle down in about 4-5 years’ time.
What do you think?
30 Days NC would be enough if I sorted out what I want and whether I should take the risk. Not sure if it’s enough for him to feel the pain of not having me in his life and sorting out HIS feelings. I’m pretty much confirmed that he and that girl had sex over 2 weeks and he recently ‘dumped’ her (not sure if it’s for good or temporary sigh)
🙁
Big age gap
March 18, 2015 at 4:28 am
Please delete the separate comment. Didn’t know there was a reply function.
You said that his actions speak louder than words, does it mean that him dating a hot girl for fun and not looking at anything long term and serious mean that what he told me previously (looking for a long term compatible relationship) was false and that he was just using me for sex and companionship? Should I still go for him?
Also got to add that he’s my first love and I gave my virginity to him. Correction, I was in two other long term relationships but he’s by far the best and I want to be with him. He…has more experience and dated older girls and girls his age. He said that I’m the best by far but I’m not sure if he really meant that.
Nic
March 16, 2015 at 8:40 pm
My boyfriend of 5 months broke up with me it was very sudden and he said that he doesn’t want to be in a relationship anymore and he wants to be left alone. He also said that he wasn’t happy with the situation at home and he’s not enjoying work. I text him a few days later and he daye later and he didn’t reply, so I text him again about 2 days after that and he did reply and then I text him the next day and he replied again. He said in the texts that he didn’t want to talk to me and I couldn’t change his mind. I said I would leave him alone, but about 3 weeks later I text home wondering how he was, he didn’t reply, so I messaged him on Facebook 2 weeks later and again he didn’t reply and he blocked me. Do you thinks it’s time to give up and move on?
admin
March 18, 2015 at 8:31 pm
What are you saying in your messages to him exactly?
carla
March 12, 2015 at 2:11 am
I’ve been seeing this man for 2.5 years. We r both separated. We have been on and off again cuz I flip when I see him active on a dating site. The routine is that I flip and start emotional texting to which he never responds. Then I reach out in a a week or so and we start slowly communicating again. This time I’ve tried a couple of times and now last NC has been over 30 days. I tried again and no response. Is this hopeless? I feel he was my soulmate but I guess he never saw me in that way. Should I wait another 30 days or leave it until he reaches out if ever? In the meantime I’ve been working out hoping to see him again. I told him that too in my last text. No response. Ty for any light u can shed on this
admin
March 13, 2015 at 7:58 pm
What are you texting him?
Like exactly?
Leigh
March 10, 2015 at 3:12 am
So what if there was no fight? One minute we were eating at a restaurant, I left to take a phone call, came back he was angry, kissed me, said he’d call later & I have never heard from him. I’ve texted & called w no response. Ran into him the other night out a bar. He didn’t even acknowledge me, as in COMPLETELY ignored me. Tried to call & he blocked my number. No contact? He won’t even notice. It’s almost like he has gone no contact on me.
admin
March 13, 2015 at 4:30 pm
Did he feel slighted that you took a call in front of him?
Do you do that often?
Leigh
March 13, 2015 at 5:03 pm
Never mentioned it bothered him & I never did it often. However it was my daughter & he knew that.
Leigh
March 14, 2015 at 10:14 am
And the blocking my number?
admin
March 15, 2015 at 4:41 pm
What about it?
Check out my page on blocking or my podcast episode on it.
At A Loss
March 9, 2015 at 5:01 pm
I am in love the a man I’ve been involved with for approximately 6 months. He’s in the process of trying to get parental rights of his son and moving out of his mothers house within a few months. His words are so contradicting I don’t know what to make of it. He told me that he has serious doubts about a future with me because
a) he has lost/doesn’t have any romantic feelings for me, he doesn’t get butterflies, only associates me as a crazy burden and ridiculous amounts of additional stress whenever we’re not hanging out (which consists of laying around watching tv) or having sex. But then he tells me his feelings for me are so erratic and inconsistent. He said the last time he had any consistent feelings for me was sometime in January. We have been in a cycle of arguing because I want more and he claims he cant even handle the thought of a relationship with me or anyone for that matter for quite some time. He has tried to stop whatever we have going on because he says im way more into him than he is with me but I always convince him to just keep things going (I see him about once a week). Says he does not love me and doesn’t know what he wants and doesn’t want to feel like he’s settling, etc etc and
b)he said if we were to jump in and move in together, with the cost of living here, he can’t afford to financially support me. I’m not able to work or drive because of a brain injury I sustained over a year ago and I don’t know if I will be able to again or not, but highly unlikely by the time he is planning to move out. Says he knows im trying but he cant afford it, still doesn’t feel romantic feelings, and says he needs a partner.
I’m at a loss of what to do about all of this. It feels hopeless but I would do anything I possibly could to be with him. What are your thoughts? Is this hopeless? What should I do?
At A Loss
March 9, 2015 at 5:04 pm
He says he isn’t seeing anyone else, that all he wants to focus on is himself and establishing a relationship with his son.
admin
March 13, 2015 at 4:09 pm
Do you believe him?
At A Loss
March 15, 2015 at 6:20 pm
I really don’t know. I feel like yes he has issues but I feel he’s using everything he can as some sort of excuse. Circumstances are never perfect, ever. I just don’t get it. I’m not sure what to do. What do you think about this situation?
Jessica
March 4, 2015 at 4:33 pm
Hi Chris,
I am in a big mess now and really want your advices. I always considered by boyfriend the best guy in the world for me and believed our relationship is going somewhere. He took care everything for me. Gradually, I became greedy and want more. He did not do a good job in terms of controlling to not use language to hurt me. I acted the same way back. I said a lot a lot things that I did not mean it. Eventually, these became physical hurts to each other. This situation lasted for about 2 months or so. On last Sunday, after a big and ugly fight, he insisted on breaking up and told everyone of his family number of bad I am (This fact is important because he cared about his brothers way more than me and now his brothers hate me. They even suggested my boyfriend to call the police when I stopped by after his work to say sorry). I know that i did not do well in No Contact. He cut all my contact information. The only one email that he forgot to block, I emailed him like 100 times in two days. He replied like 10 times in total and it’s all very straightforward answer “I will NEVER EVER going back with you. I am completely done. move on. I told all my family numbers so there is 0% chance I will be with you again. I am your past now and I wish all happiness in your life”. Some emails included “Give me space for two weeks, I would be a friend for you in the future but going back with you 0% chance” When I dropped by after his work, I really saw he looked at me in such a different way even though just two days past. He told me “He do not like me anymore even for a little and he really really do not want me anymore”. Since he brought up “2 weeks space”, I haven’t contacted him today and all these words are killing me.
Therefore, I would like to ask you if you think this will be an hopeless case or it’s still fixable. Please help me. Thank you.
admin
March 7, 2015 at 5:17 pm
Its tough but not impossible.
Definitely give him his space at this point.
Jessica
March 7, 2015 at 10:32 pm
Hello Chris,
Thank you very much for your reply. I really appreciate it.
Some updates during the past week. I haven’t contacted him since then.
He contacted my best friend to check up on me twice. He kept telling my friend something like “make sure you do not tell her that I checked up on her. I do not want encourage her. I cannot and I will not go back with her, 100%. But she do not have family here and friends with her so I want to make sure she is ok”. When my friend tried to convince him to give me another chance. His responses are basically saying how bad I treated him before and all damage were unfixable. But I am his first gf, he will always care about me but it’s not love. I will have to move on and he will move on to. But in time, I will try to be her friend again but that’s the maximum I can do. wish her all happiness in life…”
My mom emailed him once yesterday without my permission (They met twice before). His reply was short and straightforward “I am sorry, but going back is not an option…”
Chris, could you please tell me if I start talk with him like a friend after giving him enough time. Is there any chance that I can still win him back?
Please kindly let me know. Thank you very much.
admin
March 8, 2015 at 2:57 pm
Your mom emailed him???
Seriously?
Jessica
March 8, 2015 at 3:58 pm
yes, without letting me know. how bad it was?
Now I am just waiting him to get ready to be my friend again (that’s what he told my friend what he is going to do after he get ready but that’s that maximum he can do). If it really happened, do I still have a chance to start as a friend, slowly let him see my changes and win him back?Please kindly let me know.
Thank you very much, Chris.
Juli
March 3, 2015 at 8:19 pm
Hello!
I’ve just read this article and i got really glad to get all this information.
Here is my case : i dated with this guy for 4 years ( long distance relationship) …he spent the last year in brazil and all the time i thought it would make get us closer and more connected , in fact, just made me realize that i was in a broken relationship…
i figure some things out …including that my ex cheated on me almost all the time …even when we were together in brazil… well
what happened was i broke up and he asked for my friendship…i said that i couldnt be his friend unless he cut off all those girls he cheated me with…he disappeared for awhile ( few days) and then texted me as nothing happened…so i came back to this subject and highlighted that if he will not follow my request…he should stop contacting me.
he stopped ( it has been a week now) and i feel trash.
Tip: NEVER OFFER YOUR FRIENDSHIP UNDER COME CONDITION.
I’ll keep my no contact and follow my way as i knew i would but i got extremly hurt by ünderstanding how i never meant anything.
next page please…
Anna
March 3, 2015 at 6:55 am
Hey, your website is very interesting, full of insight!
But I wonder if you’ve ever come across this situation before. My bf was ignoring me after a fight so I broke up with him via text. I wanted to do it a better way, but didn’t feel left with much other options. He read it (was on kik) but never responded. If a guy won’t even acknowledge a break up with you, is that really bad? Is he super angry? Or just indifferent?
Our fight was about the same thing we’ve been fighting about for a while. The fact that he wasn’t treating me like a priority. It just happened to be because he chose to hang out with his friends this time instead that caused it to escalate.
I tried to make up with him afterwards, he just kept being angry and distant. So I felt I had no choice but to break it off.
It’s now day 5 of nc. I know it will be tough to do the 30 days. But if a guy doesn’t even seem to care that you broke up with him, is there any point trying to get him back after nc?
Thanks!
admin
March 3, 2015 at 10:00 pm
He is probably super hurt/angry.
How old is he?
Also, how long did you date him for?
Anna
March 4, 2015 at 1:22 pm
Thanks for getting back to me. I guess him being super hurt/angry is better than indifference. Marginally.
He just turned 27. We had only been dating a few months. Officially a couple for 3, so not long! I just turned 29. He sent no Happy Birthday text or anything.
I also blocked him on fb as soon as I broke up with him as I was afraid I would be too tempted to stalk his page all the time. Bad move?!!
Jorge
March 1, 2015 at 4:43 pm
Hi Chris, my ex boyfriend and I broke up 2 months ago, I implemented NC for a month plus and texted him something that would remind him of our good times, he replied something short and polite and stopped replying to my last text. He still views my snapchat stories but never snap me anymore. Does that mean I should stop trying?
Shaquera turner
March 1, 2015 at 1:10 am
For encouragement yall getting your ex back is not worth it the only person that heal your broken heart is Jesus christ he’s the only one that can save you and keep you you done need your ex back because all its going to do is make it worse for you don’t let the devil deiceive you from this worldly ways come to your senses guy. Please understand my situation with my ex was horrible I can’t even bare do I try to be with him NO because I have truly movie he was the first one to contact me and i did respond but friendly way but I haven’t should respond in the first place. But hey lesson learn do I feel like my ex will come back and try to be with me again yes he will I know he will because that’s what the devil will try to use against me but when that time comes I will be able to stand my ground when the big test come from God . I’m truly happy now by him my savior
Niki
February 27, 2015 at 11:20 am
Hi Chris, if you could remember, I told you my story of 10 years relationship around 4 months ago, you said you replied me via email but I did not receive any email from you, I wish you would resend it to me if you still have it in your sentbox. Chris, after 4 months I am still in trouble, my situation has got even worse, and I really need your help, I would be very thankful if you let me talk to you as soon as possible by email, yahoo messenger or sth like this.
looking forward to your help
Nicole
February 25, 2015 at 9:43 pm
Does texting to request items back count as breaking no contact? We dated for over two years so we had a lot of eachothers stuff and kept finding it
admin
March 1, 2015 at 5:53 pm
Check out my latest post for the answer to that question.
Mich
February 24, 2015 at 3:32 am
Hi Chris, my ex boyfriend and I broke up 2 months ago, I implemented NC for a month plus and texted him something that would remind him of our good times, he replied something short and polite and stopped replying to my last text. He still views my snapchat stories but never snap me anymore. Does that mean I should stop trying?
admin
February 24, 2015 at 9:30 pm
No, you were supposed to end the conversation right there after he responded.
Seems like you did that.
Mich
February 26, 2015 at 3:19 am
And that was the last time we talked, it’s been 2 weeks or so. I’m not sure bout what to do right now. I’m not desperate, but according to his ex (his ex and I are friends) he would only start talking to me once he knows that I’m moving on and started seeing someone else. What kind of guy exactly he is?
Krystal
February 21, 2015 at 4:04 pm
Hello Chris,
I’ve been following your blog for 2.5 months since my breakup with my boyfriend. I dated him for 6 months, after the honeymoon phase he started contacting me less via text, or dates, he said he was busy but i realize he spent a lot of his free time with his friends. Despite the contact, we still see each other at least once a week and he was respectful, caring and loving. We had a good relationship. I broke up with him and I wanted to get back together the next day and he wanted to stay separated because he said he realize he was not emotionally ready to be in a relationship and not ready to commit any relationship. He said he needs time to work on himself. I was also too emotionally dependent on him so I needed to work on myself as well. My boyfriend previously was in a serious 4.5 year relationship and during those three years he tried to get back together with her three times but failed, he then met me and we started dating. I tried the NC for three months and I started contacting him and he replied to my text unresponsively and my last text he never responded. What do you think I should do? move on or wait?
admin
February 22, 2015 at 5:07 pm
Three months may have been a bit too long.
Try texting again in a week.
What are you going to text him?
Pha
February 20, 2015 at 7:53 am
Hi Chris. Were you busy? I was waiting for your reply on my situation whether it is best to continue and fix things, or break up with my boyfriend?
admin
February 20, 2015 at 11:53 pm
I think you should really ask yourself if you want to be with him long term…
Pha
February 21, 2015 at 9:06 am
Yes I really do. We are still together now (as we speak)..but I’m sensing that he grew tired of me and maybe would break up with me soon.
Cuz I’ve made ALL mistakes, the ones you mentioned on one of your articles (Deadly Sins), and maybe that is why he started to fall out of love with me. I wonder if there’s anything I can do to turn things around? So we can be the kind of people we were the moment we started the relationship where there is so much honesty, love, care and no cheating whatsoever.
How do I make him love me again like the way it was before? I really miss my man. Is there any way I could contact you other than exboyfriendrecovery? I hope you could help me in my situation.