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Ed
December 15, 2014 at 12:12 pm
My ex and I broke up two weeks ago. He was having financial issues (student loan bills, hard time paying rent, hours getting cut at work, etc.) we got in a fight and he said the money reasons were becoming too strong and he needed to leave. we decided to stay together when he moved back, and he had intentions to move back to my place when he saved enough money.
however when he moved back things did not go as planned. we were getting into a lot of fights, I went to thanksgiving with him and he and I figured out that he would be working almost everyday at his new jobs and we’d barely get to see each other. after thanksgiving we barely talked and he went to go hang out with his friends. didn’t speak to me for about a day and a half.
I said that I think we needed a break and he said “I agree, I don’t think I can give you the love you need and deserve right now. and then he broke up with me. Not sure how to interpret that statement.
I contacted him once since and he was extremely angry and told me “don’t text me again”. I’ve been in NC since then. Do you think there’s a chance we’ll get back together? he’s also deleted me on Facebook and all of our pixtures. Didn’t delete his other ex.
amie
December 11, 2014 at 9:45 pm
Is this a good first text after 30 days NC? (the HIM part is me anticipating what he’ll say)
ME: “Hey! I think I’m headed somewhere you’ve been…”
HIM: “Where?”
ME: “Sedona. Any recommendations? I hear it’s beautiful.”
HIM: “blah blah blah”
ME: Awesome, I’ll check (recommendation) out. Thank you. Have a great night.”
(we dated 8 months and took a couple trips together. in 30 days of NC he has liked a couple pics on my Instagram but that’s all)
admin
December 15, 2014 at 5:24 am
Yes!!!!!!!!
amie
December 15, 2014 at 9:27 pm
no need for me to initiate because he texted me on day # 25 !! 😉
amie
December 16, 2014 at 9:21 pm
PS … I forgot to mention his first message was, “I’m thinking about you. I haven’t heard from you in awhile.”
😛
Yui
December 11, 2014 at 1:24 am
Help Chris! My boyfriend broke up with me one month ago. He blocked me on facebook. I begged him to stay and chased him through email. He told me that we could be friends and made him unblock me on facebook. I tried to be friends with him, until I gave up on his cold replies such as “thanks” “okay” “bye”. I ask him if we could talk in skype for the last time because I have to forget about him too (but the truth is I still want him). The next day, he messaged me that he’s confuse. But I did not reply on his message thinking that I should apply the no contact rule. I’m on my 15 day of not contacting him. I can see him online on facebook but I ever message him. We were in a long distance relationship now by the way. What will I do? Do you think I can still get him back? Help me please.
admin
December 15, 2014 at 5:15 am
Are you blocked on the phone?
Pam
December 9, 2014 at 4:50 am
My ex broke up with me a month and a half ago. We recently just started talking again, he said we could be friends, but I’ve been getting a lot of mixed signals. Telling me he remembers our favorite songs, places we used to go to, and stuff. He’s also been apologizing for the way he treated me a lot lately. Is there any chance of getting back together?
Sophie
December 8, 2014 at 9:16 pm
My situation is a little odd. Me and my ex actually broke up almost 2 years ago but we never really stopped seeing each other. He would come over every week, stuff would happen, we text each other every day, go to events together, etc. We haven’t dated anyone else in between just each other. We broke up because he didn’t want a relationship as he was too busy and wanted to focus on himself. Recently we had been particularly close, on the verge of being back together I thought as he had hinted at this. But then we had an argument 3 weeks ago. I had let him down by sharing some private news he told me that he might be moving away (I was upset about this and confided in a friend, he got mad). and he suddenly changed with me. He stopped being in touch as much, he wouldn’t come round, his texts got shorter and shorter. Then I found out he had a blind date last week and he likes her. We then had a heart to heart and I wished him the best… but I can’t believe this has happened! Now he’s cut contact pretty much. I gave up trying to text him on Saturday (his cold replies were upsetting me) But I’m worried NC from me will mean he totally moves on to this other girl. Plus I’m not sure I can, we have the same friends, work in the same building, share the same gym and have a joint Xmas do in two weeks! I dont know what to do or if I should just give up…but I feel like I’ve lost my best friend. 🙁 Help?
admin
December 9, 2014 at 1:21 pm
Ok, let me put it this way for you.
Doing what you are doing now, has it worked for you so far? Has he committed to you?
Sophie
December 9, 2014 at 6:34 pm
No. 🙁 So NC then even with the new girl on the scene? Oh well I’m 4 days in already! Do I blank him at the Xmas party or be polite?
admin
December 10, 2014 at 3:22 pm
Yep, and be polite at the christmas party.
Sophie
December 10, 2014 at 10:20 am
Hi again, I’ve had time to explore your website more and have found the answer to that question now!
Michi
December 4, 2014 at 11:47 pm
Hi Chris
I was dating this great guy for 3 years he is the love of my life. He can be stubborn and blind to his errors and I’m prideful and arrogant. Despite that we had a pretty good relationship despite that I always felt I tried harder I was always planning dates more gifts surprises romances all that good stuff. He did to but not as much because he’s an emotionally closed of person and I need a lot of verbal reassurance and attention which he’s not good at. Point is we end up breaking up twice because I get disillusioned and start liking someone else. I then try coming back but a lot happened mean things arguments stress it was a mess between us both basically. Everyone tells me I always tried harder and he didn’t deserve me and to give him time but idk what to do. He told me the last time we broke up that he couldn’t be with a girl like me and last Saturday we talked sorta got on better terms and he said he wants nothing more than to date me but holds himself back because he knows I’ll betray him. Then it was basically a I don’t want you or love you but I do we reminisced connected and he said things he still loves about me. I didn’t beg or plead I also know he has someone else but he tells me he doesn’t even like her that much.Then I he said maybe in the future. After that day we’ve stopped talking but I saw him on monday and again today and he texted me apologizing for not saying hi as we had a small conversation. I have no idea what to do it all seems like a mess but I still love him.
admin
December 8, 2014 at 12:30 pm
Did you initiate the first two breakups?
Who broke up with who this time?
Michi
December 8, 2014 at 1:40 pm
Thanks Chris and yes I had initiated the breakups but the second time it was practically like we weren’t even dating like we where just people who texted and we hadn’t acted like a couple in a long time so I don’t even know if I can consider that an actual relationship
admin
December 9, 2014 at 1:06 pm
Did you even see him in person the second time?
Michi
December 9, 2014 at 4:06 pm
No sadly the first time I did and he get really bad and I cried
Michi
December 15, 2014 at 7:48 pm
Should I just stop talking to him I’ve already been doing that for my sake to but should I continue. It’s been like a week maybe or more cause I broke NC like two weeks ago.
jade
December 4, 2014 at 7:30 pm
Hi Chris
so two months ago my boyfriend broke up with me. we had been together for three and a half years and he had just gone back to university for his second year. things had got complicated because he was accommodated in a flat full of first years and everything was about partying and getting ‘wasted’. I started to get quite temperamental as pictures where appearing on his Facebook where a girl would be lay on his bed with him or he’d be hugging them round their waist or they would be sat on his knee kissing his cheek. I got to breaking point. he had crashed his car and his mum and dad had gave him the money to fix it or buy another one, but instead he decided to spend the money on nights out, making things harder for us until I passed my test. I went a step further than I would like and I told him to choose, I said I wanted to come first and if he couldn’t do so then that was it for us. he apologised and held his hands up, saying he had been a horrible boyfriend and that I deserve so much better. he came home that weekend and I was ready with my suitcase to go and join him at uni for the week so then we could sort things out. instead he decided to call things off. the whole time he said ‘I could be making the biggest mistake of my life letting you go’ and said he wanted to stay as friends. I went straight into the no contact rule and ignored all communications for a months and deactivated my facebook. my first text was to ask how he was and explained that it was nothing personal me not replying to him but I understood I needed to find who I was outside of us and that I felt ready for a new kind of relationship with him where we would be just friends. he was polite and said that he was completely okay with it and then I said that we would have to talk soon as I was getting ready to go out with my friends. he told me to have fun. since then the conversations have progressed. he has started ringing me every day or texting. he tells me I’m still the most beautiful girl he has ever seen, that he misses me loads, he even asked if I would like to meet up when he comes home for Christmas and if we where doing presents. he has started to run into complications with uni and has said that he may have to leave for the rest of the year at Christmas and redo his second year in the next academic year. this scares me as I feel that maybe I’m getting dragged along because he doesn’t know if he will be able to stay where he is for the rest of the year and there isn’t a lot left for him here outside of his family. he also likes to describe how he has ‘let himself go’ to me, how he is stressed and the obsessive drinking has lead to some weight gain. this makes me feel bad as I have grown to be quite confident in myself as I have dropped down a dress size after going for daily jogs and a new diet and I feel good in most things I try on now.
as well as this my friends are loving to give their view on the matter even when I don’t ask or tell , saying I should never get back with him because there is obviously a trust issue on my behalf as this isn’t the first time even though it is more serious and permanent than before, other friends are saying he may be scared as I go to uni next year and I will be in the same situation as him and he knows of the opportunities available.
your site has helped me a lot and I would love to gain your opinion on the matter and what it is you think I should do.
thank you
Jade 🙂
admin
December 8, 2014 at 12:26 pm
He has been a horrible boyfriend to you.
Definitely use the NC rule on him.
Katie
December 4, 2014 at 2:48 am
So I was dating this amazing guy for 6 months and then he went off to boot camp for the army. He wrote every week saying how he loved me and couldn’t wait to see me again and he promised to marry me. He said nothing and nobody could split us up. Not even a few big fights. 3 months later he graduated from bootcamp and was on leave for 30 days for fracturing his hip. He didn’t want me to know but I heard it through the grapevine. I ended up texting him and something wasn’t right. He said he wasn’t breaking up with me. So I waited a week and asked him if he loved me still and he said he didn’t know anymore because of the “headaches” I caused him. He said life has happened and he can see with his eyes wide open now. We ended up arguing so he asked me to give him space and I did. A couple weeks later he texted me saying he made up his mind and wanted to break up. I panicked and kept asking for a second chance to prove that I have changed. He said I have caused him stress because I “made him always answer to me with everything he did” and I “made him put me first before anything in his life.” I always told him to never worry about me so much and told him to never put me first all the time. But he always insisted my happiness came first. But now he thinks I made him do that. I told him I hated it when he did and he said it didn’t matter now. He said he’s made up his mind. Just a week before he came home he was saying how he could wait to see me and loved me very much. How can he just drop his feelings just like that? His mom doesn’t understand either and when she tried talking to him about it he would just say “I don’t want to talk about it” and he’d walk away. We were always crazy about each other the 9 months we were together. We were madly in love and planned to get married. We have been through worse things before that should’ve broken us up but ridding because we always talked it out and fixed it and compromised. I don’t want to lose him. He was also my best friend. He was my everything and he still is. I know these all sound very cliché but it’s true. He broke his promises to me and it’s got me very heartbroken. When I think of him in a new relationship, I freak out. I just don’t understand how you could lose all feelings in just a week. I didn’t say or do anything to make him mad. I haven’t seen him in over 3 months now and he’s now back in training for the army for another couple months. I can’t lose him. I need to understand what could’ve happened to make him lose his feelings towards me when he used to be crazy about me. Help?
admin
December 4, 2014 at 1:30 pm
Well, hes not in a new relationship right?
Have you tried doing nc on him yet?
Alexis
December 3, 2014 at 10:13 pm
Me and my me and my ex boyfriend would have been together almost 3 months the 14th. He meant the world to me omg. He was the one to take me on my first date , say he loved me, got me gifts, lost my virginity to. Overall he was like my first real boyfriend. I love him so much. Im sensitive and I cry over little things he does. Like joking and stuff. But the last few days before we broke up been different. A day before we broke up I asked how many sexual partners he’s had in the past. I got very jealous because I wanted us to loose our virginity together. I lost my virginity with him like 5 days before that. I went and hung out with him and his friends up at McDonalds but he acted different. We like argued and was mad and sad at each other the whole day. I cried and left. Later that night I was super upset and wanted to talk. We talked about how we could make this relationship work and stop argueing as much. We made a deal of we argued one more time in 3days we had to break up. (This was a step in our relationship to make it better) I cried to him and told him its okay to argue this much and I love him. But he said he couldn’t hurt me anymore and I would be happier with someone else. The next day at school I brought him cookies looked him dead in the eyes and told him how much I loved him. I only see him for 15 in the morning at school. Then we split for our classes. But then by the end of the day he was acting different. And I knew it was about us. I asked to see him before we left school for a hug and kiss. He made an excuse he’d miss his bus and he couldn’t
(Which he never made that excuse before) I got on my bus first and he came out a fee minutes later with his friends. (As the buses were about to leave) It hurt my feelings. When we got home we was talking about our relationship and he talked about how he don’t make me happy and this couldn’t work anymore. I never felt so heartbroken before. I begged for him to get with me again , and cried to him. But he won’t budge he just keeps saying someone else will make me happier and he’s not good enough . but I told him I need him . he’s my love, I would do anything for another chance . but still get told the same thing. I Give up. I told him he obviously don’t want me anymore . he . he won’t really talk to me. And he said maybe we could try again soon he just wants me to date other people and see how it goes. I cried all day at school . I seen him in the halls today and he called my name. And positioned his hand to hold my but stopped real quick. I think there’s still a chance . I think he’s just upset and is thinking . I don’t know if I should give up trying to get him back . and stop messaging him trying to start a conversation. Im scared to do the no contact rule because what if while I’m trying to get him back and him to miss me in the 30 days he just moves on? I know Im young I’m 14 . and he’s 16 but honestly I was in love I been crying for 2 days straight and haven’t ate since he broke up with me. I need him so much. Do you think we still have a chance? What does this sound like to you? Advice?
admin
December 4, 2014 at 2:07 am
I think he got freaked out by how you were reacting.
Definitely try out the NC rule on him. He won’t know what hit him.
Grace
December 3, 2014 at 7:21 pm
Hi! Me and my ex broke up just over 2 months ago. He had a relationship before me that ended very badly and I don’t think he ever truely got over it and her! We were together for 2 years and during this time his ex wanted nothing to do with him however they randomly bumped into each other and he said he needed to make things right with her as their relationship wouldn’t of ended if it wasn’t for his mistake. We were happy until she came back. I’ve been doing NC for 5 weeks now and have been told by mutual friends they are back together but I don’t know how true this is. Could she be classed as rebound? And do I still stand a chance if getting him back?
admin
December 4, 2014 at 2:05 am
How long was he with her exactly?
Grace
December 4, 2014 at 6:16 am
About 2.5 years. Any advice please?
Hanna
December 3, 2014 at 5:42 pm
My boyfriend broke up with me last Friday after we dated almost 3 years. The reason why he broke up was because for once he didn’t really know if he even wants to be in a relationship still and he also kind of had this feeling that he can’t be his true self around me.
Which I know sounds pretty bad! Anyway since then I didn’t contact him at all. Although he texted me twice since last Friday.
The first message I received the same day he broke up with me saying that he wants me not to get caught in depression and instead to become very happy.
The second message I received today in which he said that he misses me sometimes and also that his mind is clearing up since he’s on his own now. He said it feels bittersweet.
What do you guys think? Do you think I still have a chance of getting him back or is he already moving on?
Any advice/opinion would be great!
Thanks
admin
December 4, 2014 at 2:02 am
Stay in NC. You are getting positive responses from him already.
Ariana
December 3, 2014 at 1:00 am
Me and my ex are going through a awful month, long story short we ran into eachother at a party and I was drunk and things happened witch lead to me uncontrollably crying and him blocking me, my phone and my facebook, I have no way to contact him. I’m going to do the no contact for 30 days, as well as I’ve been communicating with his best friend who is telling me, that my ex just needs space, and time and I need to be patient. I did slip the day after the party and downloaded a texting app, where I texted him off of 10 numbers because I was so terribly afraid he was a goner. His best friend told me I have a chance if I leave him alone and give him space, but things ended so horribly, my ex seems like he doesn’t care about me at all. I’m just afraid he’s going to forget my existence that’s why I contacted him. But I’m taking his best friends advice as to leaving him alone for a while a month or maybe even more to see if he unblocks me or anything, I just have a few questions. How do I contact him after a month of im feeling so strongly for him still if he still has my number and facebook blocked? And after hearing what I said about him, do you think I have a chance of getting him back? No one cheated, everything was perfect we never ever fought at all ever! Untill the last month of the relationship, he just called me boring, and he’s lost interest in me, and I think I freaked out so badly with being so scared to loose him, that ultimately I scared him off. I just really need your help please.
Ariana
December 3, 2014 at 1:33 am
More things about us is, we were together for 6 months, we hung out like 3 times a week, he lived a hour from me and was always in my tea though because this is where his friends also live, he told me he didn’t want to hang out a lot because he was scared I was going to get annoying he said and I guess that’s happened to him in the past with other girls. But he cried infront me one night about how much he cared about me and how I make him happy just out of the blue in the middle in our relationship, and two weeks ago he was texting me telling me to find somebody else to love, im annoying, he has no feelings for me anymore. It just confuses me so much and his best friend is telling me to be patient and wait and he will come back to me, I just need to wait. But there’s so many conflicting signs. I just know I definitely need to leave him alone for now. He still has me blocked .
admin
December 3, 2014 at 5:04 pm
Have you read my article on exes blocking you?
Ariana
December 3, 2014 at 7:54 pm
Yes I have, it’s just how do I get in touch with him again, in the future is he still has me blocked? On facebook and my phone number. I want him back so badly, it’s just I don’t know what to do other then to wait, like are the favors in my odds?
Cleo
December 3, 2014 at 12:39 am
Hello Chris,
It’s been a year since I last spoke to my ex. We dated for about 4 months and things were going well until he thought about doing a career change and then met some road blocks. He stopped contacting me as much and we spoke less. The last time I spoke with him we talked a long time on the phone about what was going on in our lives and it was very positive. He told me he liked hearing my voice and he was glad I called and we talked. Then he said he wanted to take me out the following week, but had to check his schedule as he worked two jobs. That was the last time I heard from him and we never met for that date. We never had a formal break up where it was said that we were ending things, he just up and disappeared. Until he was having work issues we had a pretty good relationship and a strong personal connection.
Lately I’ve been thinking about contacting him but I’m worried that it might be creepy to contact him over year a later after he ghosted on me. Is it possible to send a text to this particular ex that won’t seem as though I am still pining for him after over a year?
He was a chef and loved food and I was think of sending a simple text along the lines, “I’m about to do some part-time accounting work for a restaurant and it made me think of you,” but talking about work may be taboo. So maybe a more general, “I recently went a restaurant that made its own pasta. It reminded me of the time we made ravioli.” Is it bad to tag on a how are you to the end? Any advice would be appreciated.
Thank you!
-Liz
admin
December 3, 2014 at 5:04 pm
Depends on how you contact him.
If you contact him and immediately ask him out then yes, it might be weird. But if you contact him for a few days, rebuild that connection and then ask him out it might be successful.
J
December 2, 2014 at 6:14 pm
Hi Chris!
It’s been almost a month since my ex boyfriend broke up with me. He intiated it, and said that he didn’t want to lose me out of his life and asked to be friends but that he still loves me. I said that I have to put a boundary and that I just could not simply be friends because I am still in love with him
And that I couldn’t stick around around for him to figure out what he wants.
Immediately after I decided to delete him from all social media for my sake and sanity, and blocked him. Did the NC for a week in a half and he contacted me first saying he was worried that I deleted him from social media and that he missed me. I caved in, he still wanted to keep me in his life but wanted to be friends. I still kept to my boundary and reiterated what I said to him at our intial breakup.
Anyways long story short, I gave him a letter the last time we spoke. It stated all the best things that I loved about the relationship, about him, how it made me grow but also acknowledging what didn’t work but how I came to accept it and really all the love we shared. It’s been almost a month of NC. He hasn’t contacted me yet since the letter.
I miss him tremendously, and was just wondering what to do from here and if I should be worried about never hearing from him again?
admin
December 3, 2014 at 4:51 pm
Well, after NC you do realize you are supposed to contact him right?
Nik
December 1, 2014 at 7:18 pm
I could really do with your advice.
A year ago I met a guy and we had an amazing connection, he became my best friend and we saw each other for 3 months. It was amazing and intense and no one had ever made me feel like he did. Constant texts, talked for hours on phone, bought presents for each other, I honestly thought he was “the one” Only issue was that we both had partners (him 4 yrs, me 8 yrs) He ended it with me after 3 months through guilt and stayed with his girlfriend as her mother was dying. A month later I finished with my boyfriend realising that I wouldn’t have gone elsewhere if I loved him. Since then I’ve had minimal contact with the guy, the odd text – usually instigated by me and we also met a month after things ended, we talked and he told me he was now happy with his girlfriend but it seemed so forced.
2 months ago this guy text me that he had also split with his girlfriend. Since then we’ve exchanged a few texts, but he seems so busy – he is a complete workaholic.and where before he always made time for me this doesn’t seem to now be the case.
We met again on Saturday for the first time in 7 months. The meet up was instigated by me.It was just meant to be a catch up. We drank and talked for hours, went for dinner and ended up in a bar. Over dinner we had exchanged stories and since breaking up with his girlfriend he has slept with 1 girl and been for dinner with 2 others. He said he wasn’t looking for another relationship but if the right girl came along he would know because he would make time for her and choose her over work.
In the bar afterwards he kissed me, I literally transported back in time and all my old feelings came flooding back. I went back to his and we had sex.
Next morning he got up early and I found him working in his office, I tried to get him to come back to bed but he said he had too much work to do. He then drove me home. I didn’t hear from him so I text him last night and I had a polite reply back the following day . How do I get him back properly? Is there a chance?
admin
December 2, 2014 at 2:44 pm
Ignore him. Make him come to you.
Nik
December 2, 2014 at 4:49 pm
Ignore him or NC?
admin
December 3, 2014 at 4:46 pm
Aren’t they the same? haha.
katy
December 1, 2014 at 5:23 pm
I was unable to comment here…so i have messeged you on facebook……please reply
admin
December 2, 2014 at 2:30 pm
You are able to comment here. I have to moderate things before they go live.
katy
December 2, 2014 at 4:27 pm
“I don’t think it’s working anymore and I can’t handle it. Lets not drag it up. I don’t like you being so much possessive about this. Moreover I can’t concentrate on anything. I’m not giving my 100% in this. I’m breaking up with you. Please don’t force me to continue because I won’t.“…….This is what he wrote……
When i got to knw that he smokes…..i questioned him but i almoat yelled at him……tht very point he said that if i have have issues i should brkup with him….whn i asked him wht he was saying….he disconnected the call….i texted and called him for 2days den he blocked me….i knw he will take time to cool down bcoz blocking me was normal…..but after a week i get this above message that hez brking up with me…..
I want to tell you he was my ex earliar…..with your guide i got him back but now i again lost him……is there a chance……PLEASE DO REPLY!!
Sunday at 11:37
Kavya Kumar
I told him to talk to me about it and clear….
He said that we can talk but that wont change his mind….he needs to concentrate on few things and relationship is not one of them….. after that he said…“i m sorry but its over Please accept it“
admin
December 3, 2014 at 4:43 pm
I would just jump into NC on him.
katy
December 3, 2014 at 5:39 pm
I m on NC……but do you think it will work?….we broke up twice and this time all i did was just questioned him about smoking…….was there any strong reason to break up??…….what do you think??
Do ppl get their ex for the third time also??…..will i hv any chance……
admin
December 4, 2014 at 2:02 am
Yes, I htink it can be effective.
I hate smoking so I have no reason to think its not a good enough reason.
katy
December 4, 2014 at 12:11 pm
Even i hate smoking….that was the reason i questioned him….but whn took my words so casually(which he generally does as i feel that) i almost shouted at him…..if i question him on things which i dont like….does that make me possessive?(thats what he mentioned whn he broke up)……what do you think??
admin
December 4, 2014 at 1:34 pm
It makes you in need of someone who takes you seriously and communicates. Not sure that makes you possesive.
katy
December 20, 2014 at 4:34 am
My NC will end on new year eve day…..if he texts me happy new year or something….how shld i reply……and if i have to wish den what should i do??…..how should i make the first contact??
katy
December 2, 2014 at 5:24 pm
He didnt call me so i started with my NC……can i get him back again??…..do i have a chance to get him back again?
sara
December 1, 2014 at 1:12 pm
Hello, my name is Sara. My boyfriend broke up with me on thursday and sunday is when I did the “I cant live with out you stuff.” My ex and I have been together for 3years and have lived together for 2 1/2 years. He is saying he does not love me at all. That there is no love for me left and that he was unhappy. So let’s me start with the fight this started November 2nd. Him and I had gotten into a huge fight and he listed things that were wring with me. Example, I did not 100% trust him and everything he said that he was doing. I would doubt him. 2nd I could not stop thinking he was going to leave me. Finally our physical life sucked. After he left out all his anger later that day he told me he wanted to try us. He does not want it to end like this so I said yes. Over the past few weeks I though v. .. . t we were good and he was happy. With some small arguments. Then comed.s November 27th I went to work with a pulled muscle. I was hurting , , badly and passed out so I called him to get me heat wraps to help relax my back. muscle. He came up there and I was in so much pain I just wasn’t feeling anything. He thought I was upset from the spat we had the night before, in which case I had already forgotten about it. So I leave work and go to my parents house for Thanks Giving. We eat yadayadayada. 3:45 rolls around and I call him to see if he is heading over yet. He replied that he would call me back later. So we hing up and about 5 minutes he called me back upset telling he hardly gets to see his family that he is spending time with them. I hope you get where that is going. So he comes over and we cuddle and kiss and he even says he loves me a couple of times. As the night goes on I was twlling him I am going in early tomorrow so you know him and I could have some sexy time that night. He replied with “we are going to do stuff Saturday and we did stuff the day before so on and so forth” so I get upset and by the time I leave my parents house I am upset and I probably show it to my parents. So now we are home and we have our fight he goes to bed and I get up. When I come back I fall asleep only to be woken up with sharp pains in my back. I am crying and he is massaging and is saying “ee both know why you are really crying it is bexause of the fight and to stop crying.” I get up and leave and end up driving my self to the hosipital. My bro comes. Telling me Joe would not come abd he says we are broken up. I leave it. I get back turns out I had multiple Kidney stones and on top of that my pulled muscle. So I go to the room once I return and he is sleeping I woke him up and told him what was wrong. Half asleep he tells me he loves me, he is there for me, and if I need anything ask. Fast forward to sunday the 30th. We finally have the talk. Are we broken up or not and he said yes we are. That he is not happy and hasn’t be since November 2nd. He said he lost all his love for me. That there is nothing left. That there is no way he would get back with me. So I did the beg for him back and cry and try ro figure out what was wrong why I could not fix it bit. By the time it was over I accepted that him and i are done. This is where I am a bit confused on what to do. In the same night after the talk he has been taken care of me getting me water buying me food and even said he would still help me pay rent and bills and everything. I am just a tad confused at where him and I are at. Honestly I do not know what to do and which rules I should follow. Help me out because I want this to work. And I know I have to show him i have changed by how do I do it?.
admin
December 1, 2014 at 3:49 pm
Have you attempted NC yet?
sara
December 1, 2014 at 4:01 pm
No I haven’t do you think out of everything that os the best option?
admin
December 2, 2014 at 2:28 pm
At this point.
Anne
November 29, 2014 at 12:07 am
Hi Chris!
I was with my boyfriend for three months and it was going quite well, but he broke up with me two weeks ago because I accidentally said I hate him and it really hurt him. I was in a bad mood and I didnt mean it, but he wouldnt forgive me. We’ve had no contact since then. And btw he has depression and anxiety. Do you think these ttactics will work on him?
admin
December 1, 2014 at 3:26 pm
Why would you say that though?
I think NC can definitely be effective.
AmyG.
November 28, 2014 at 10:24 pm
Hello,
So my boyfriend and I broke up just about a week ago. We had been dating for about 6 months and he was my first love. It had been an LDR and things were great at the beginning, but I think my feelings began to change and that scared me, so I responded by getting clingy and he responded by pushing away. That made me push back even more, asking when he was going to call again, etc. I think it just made him feel suffocated. Anyway he came to visit me the next week and something happened that made me question if I was the only one who cared about the relationship anymore. Anyway long story short we ended up breaking up that night. We haven’t spoken since and it’s been killing me. Although I don’t know if I want to get back into the relationship, I do want him to contact me so I can at least know this wasn’t for nothing. I just want some closure if nothing else because after we broke up he took a cab to the airport and that was that. He has told me that in the past he blocks his exes when he’s done with them on Facebook, but he hasn’t blocked me yet. And he moved a picture that we had taken together to the first picture anyone sees on his tagged photos, which makes me think he’s still not sure what he wants. I did make the mistake of requesting him as a friend on FB but a few hours later I took it back. I guess my question is is there still hope that we can at least talk?
admin
December 1, 2014 at 3:21 pm
Yes, the odds are dfinitely in your favor to talk with him at some point.
Melissa
November 28, 2014 at 8:26 pm
What do you do if you get no response after you text them after 30 days? How long do you wait until you try again?
admin
December 1, 2014 at 3:18 pm
A week!