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Kitty
February 23, 2015 at 11:04 am
I meant so now after the nc period my ex bf start to keep texting me everyday but asking repeated question like take care how am I, happy vday, happy bday etc only. Nothing long and my reply is normal like short and reply like a friend. And he didn’t mention anything about patching up or related just simple daily remarks and take care and hi kind. Been like this for continuously of 6 days and u stop texting me for 3 days already. What does this action means? He even posted our signature song lyrics etc.
admin
February 23, 2015 at 9:48 pm
Seems like he is checking up on you.
Kitty
February 24, 2015 at 3:36 pm
But right now he stopped msg me again like 6 days of continuous msg and suddenly stopped for 3 days already. What does this action means? And should I text him or do not initial to text him?
Lily
February 22, 2015 at 6:24 pm
Hi Chris, I hope this isn’t too much information, but I would really appreciate your advice.
I was with my boyfriend for 2 years, and we had an awesome relationship. We were really close and we were both crazy about each other. Towards the end of last year, for some reason, we went through a period where we would bicker over stupid little things that didn’t matter, which was weird for us because we never fought over anything, ever. We got past it and I forgot about it. A few months later out of the blue, my boyfriend (through a text) said he needed to see me soon because we needed to talk about us. I of course asked him what there was to talk about, and he said that he wasn’t happy anymore in our relationship, “it’s not you it’s me,” we didn’t have the same connection, he loved me but he didn’t want to drag me down, and he didn’t know what to do anymore. He said he had been feeling this way since our period of fighting, he was stressed, and couldn’t be comfortable with anything he did. We ended up seeing each other that night at my house. As soon as he came in the door, he said I love you, and hugged me, and said that he was so stupid for nearly letting me go, I’m the best thing that’s ever happened to him, he hadn’t been a good boyfriend lately, but he was “here to stay.” He actually started crying, harder than I had ever seen him cry, so I knew he was genuine. We had a really romantic, fun date then. The next day (texting) he said he was sorry, and doing what he was going to do originally (break up with me) was childish, and he was “madly in love with” me. Two days later was New Year’s Eve, and we of course had planned a date which I was super excited for, thinking that spending time together would help make our relationship stronger. He then texted me and said his friends had asked him to hang out on NYE and he said yes to hanging out with them, in other words, screwing me over on our date. He said that he was sorry for canceling our date, but I of course was mad since we’d been talking about our date for several days already. I didn’t understand why he said yes to hanging out with friends when we already had a date planned. After NYE, our relationship went back to how it was before he had made up with me. For nearly a week, he pretty much ignored me, never said I love you or anything romantic. In early January he broke up with me through a text, using the same reasons he had expressed before. It was a very nice text honestly as far as his word choice, he wasn’t accusing or mean at all. He repeatedly said that none of this was my fault and I had done nothing wrong. Something I noticed was that 3 times in the text he said he would always love me and have a place for me in his heart, the one time even saying he’d always love me “whether we’re together again or apart,” which to me sounded like he might give me a second chance. He said also said that I made him happy but our relationship didn’t. He said he wanted to be “close” friends, and I agreed. We saw each other in person two days later, and he was really nice to me, nicer than he had been to me in a while. We talked a lot and kind of teased each other. It honestly felt like we were still in a relationship. We had to hold hands with each other for a prayer and he stroked my thumb, which in my mind means something. We texted each other the rest of the day then and had a really pleasant conversation, and again he was much nicer to me than he had been in a while. After that day, though, he didn’t talk to me in person, only smiled at me across the room. We actually went a couple weeks without talking to each other again. I was disappointed that we had agreed to be friends yet we didn’t talk to each other, so I texted him and expressed this. (I realize now that it was stupid to expect us to be best friends right out of the gate.) He said he did want to be friends but he felt awkward around me now and he needed some time to get acclimated to the change in our relationship. He, like before, said he was stressed and felt like he couldn’t do anything right. I’ve noticed him look at me and then look away as if he didn’t want me to see him looking at me. Today was the first time we had talked in person in close to a month. (I’m a few days away from the end of NC.) He came up to me and started talking, kind of teasing me, again a nice conversation. To me, his teasing feels exactly like how he would flirt with me when we were dating.
I started this process because I want him to be that special person in my life, and since we agreed to be friends I didn’t want to fall into the friend zone trap. Does the fact that he reconciled with me, even though he ended up breaking up with me, mean something? Why is he being nice and friendly to me now even though was he rude to me and ignored me towards the end of our relationship? And finally, is it too soon after the break up to be seeking my second chance, or can this process be started at any time? I love him a lot and want him to be in my life again, so I really don’t want to mess this up. Thanks for your help! 🙂
admin
February 23, 2015 at 9:17 pm
Maybe he is starting to look at your past relationship in a better light hence his better mood.
Lily
February 25, 2015 at 1:05 am
Hopefully, because that certainly sounds like a good thing to me!
Julia
February 22, 2015 at 9:43 am
Hello Chris ! It’s amazing how you are devoted to website, a check every once in a while to find much more rich information, thank you 🙂
Actually I finished NC, and I don’t feel that need to talk to my BF like before,I feel like moving on instead of reaching him, maybe talking to him as a friend;later. I have this independant feeling, I feel good and want to see what life brings more, Is it normal to feel that way after NC or it’s just caused by stubborness and fear to talk to him ?
admin
February 22, 2015 at 5:30 pm
Hi Julia,
Have you checked out the new podcast?
Julia
February 22, 2015 at 7:06 pm
Oh I just listened to the podcast, I see how this applies to my situation. Beside we are both in our 20’s and inexperienced with relationships, I guess we are both falling out of love and we suppose that we can choose the easy way out. Well, After listening to the podcat I realised that realtionships needs effort to improve, I’ll try the plan 🙂 lets see where it ll take us 🙂 thank you soo much Chris
admin
February 23, 2015 at 9:19 pm
Definitely try the plan and stay tuned to the podcast. Also, leave a review in iTunes if you can.
Julia
February 22, 2015 at 9:48 am
Sorry for writing mistakes 😀 I want to mention also that he didn’t contact me at all during this periode, and was ignoring my last messages, I don’t know for sure why I see no need to talk to him right now
Julia
February 22, 2015 at 9:58 am
We did have a break up, we had argument, and I did the mistake of accusing him of seeing other girl because he ignored my texts, then I apologized, all this through texts we did meet, He didn’t answer to all this texts and jut ignored them, so I started going into NC, now I wanna move on even without trying that first reaching text, i m not sure if this is just a pscycological wall i m builing
sorry for mistake again, english isn’t my native language 😉
Syd
February 21, 2015 at 10:21 am
Uh, yeah..my ex would see right through all these texts. They are too long and involved. I think my best bet after NC is to just say hey, how have you been? and leave it at that.
admin
February 22, 2015 at 4:50 pm
You know your situation best BUT don’t just read this page. Read the entire site there are a lot more texts than just these.
fay
February 21, 2015 at 7:01 am
Hi there, my situation is as follows, me and my ex had been together for over a year and a few months, the first time (break up) happened a few days after my birthday, we had a silly argument and he ended up telling me that he ‘couldn’t do it anymore’ and didn’t want to be with me, at that point he told me he still loves me but he’s not in love with me. I spent the first few days messaging and begging and apologising, after that initial first reaction I left him alone for a few days and then casually got back in touch, we practically got back together then but under his circumstances that I only see him once a week and that if I annoy him again then it’s over. 2 weeks later he decides he doesn’t want a relationship and to stop messaging him, this stemmed from the fact that a text him that morning saying I loved him and I commented on the fact that he didn’t text me back. He said we can be friends but I clearly don’t want to be friends. I know I’ve been stupid and I regret so much, I really thought we’d work after I’d got him back the first time and I tried everything to show him how much I love him, I’m not going to give up on him and I believe we can be happy together. I just don’t know what to do, hes said such horrible things to me and things keep switching from the fact that he doesn’t want a relationship to the fact that he can’t stand me and mentions everything that makes me so bad. I just love him so much. Please help??????
admin
February 22, 2015 at 4:43 pm
Go full NC!
Seriously, he won’t know what hit him.
Kitty
February 21, 2015 at 6:56 am
Hi Chris so now after the nc period my ex bf start to keep texting me everyday but asking repeated question like take care how am I, happy vday happy bday etc only. Nothing long and my reply is normal like bubbly and reply like normally. But he have been updated status like looking back at the love and like missed the period and u have moved on etc. What shd I do?
admin
February 22, 2015 at 4:39 pm
I don’t get whatyou mean with the missed the period thing..
Kitty
February 21, 2015 at 6:56 am
But of cos he didn’t mention anything abt patching up or going out. It’s just everyday one random 1 to 2 msges. It’s weird.
Emily
February 20, 2015 at 7:38 pm
Hey Chris!
Just wanted your advice/input on my situation.
So I dated a guy all throughout high school – for about 5 years. People say that it was young love, but I experienced a lot with him and fell in love. We broke up once when he first went to college (he is 1 year older) and I was extremely sad. But eventually I started dating someone new. Right when I started dating this new guy, my ex boyfriend started trying to talk to me and get me back.. Typical haha. So we ended up getting back together a few months later and stayed together for 2 more years. Last summer, I got on medicine that deeply affected my moods. I warned him that it could potentially be a side effect and he told me that he would tell me if he noticed a difference. In august (2014), I asked him for a break because I felt we needed a little time apart to appreciate each other more. We had spent most of the summer together. But a week after I asked for the small break, he broke up with him saying that he needs time to himself and needs time to grow. He kept telling me that he still loved me, but said that he thought it was best that we break up and focus on ourselves for a little while. He also kept emphasizing that “what’s meant to be will be”. I of course freaked out and had a very emotional rest of the year. I am already an emotional person with a soft heart, but this makes it harder. He has been doing his own thing and having fun – which I love. Because I wanted that for both of us. I’ve grown closer to friends and explored new interests. But it’s been about 7 months since the break up and I just miss him and our relationship. He’ll text me every once in a while just a simple “hey” and I’ll do the same. But sometimes I have bad days and text him paragraphs of how badly it hurts and how much I miss him. And for a while, we still hung out and did the fwb thing.. But clearly it never worked out and just made me more emotional. Any time I bring up me wanting to possibly move on, he tells me it would really affect him. But sometimes he won’t even respond to text messages.
I tried the no contact but it only lasted about 9 days. It’s rough to cut him completely out of my life because I’m still in love with him.
What’s your advice? Sorry it’s a lot!
Thanks!
admin
February 22, 2015 at 4:15 pm
When was the last time he texted you?
You need to last 9 days.
Kelly -J
February 20, 2015 at 2:49 pm
Hey Chris! So my situation is A little but complicated… I dated this guy for 5 years. We were 19 & 21 years old . We had the most exciting &beautiful first year together filled with a lot of love and good memories but it ended suddenly. We were separated for 3 months then got back together and ever since we had this on and off relationship type. We start dating,everything is going alright then me or he call it off for different reasons. Then,he ALWAYS find a new girl to date right away(like 2 weeks-1month max) and “fall in love”.I never understood if it was a coping mechanism for the breakup or that he was emotionally depent or both lol. After an average of 5months with the new girls, he’d ALWAYS came back to me saying that i was THE ONE for him,that nobody was like me,i was special,nobody gets him like i do blabla etc (well,you get the picture lol) i ALWAYS accepted to take him back because i loved him with all my heart,i saw in him something that i didn’t see in others,we had a really great chemistry and other reasons..We’ve been through so much over the years,like life threw us a lot of rocks both personally and on our relationship,we called us survivors lol.So the last time,HE broke up with me over a voicemail. One month after,he started dating a new girl who is 8years younger than him (26-18). Once again i don’t know if it was a rebound or that he simply fell in love with her. While he was with her,he called me a certain morning like 5 times,telling me that he had regrets over the break up,that he was scared for this new relationship, that he was scared that he’d wake up someday and realize that he still loves me etc. I never responded because i was trying to move on for good and didn’t want to start the “get back together circle”. So 3months after those calls,i made a little research. I think they’re not together anymore. So i saw that as an opportunity because i still have feelings for him and if it´s possible i would like to get back with him BUT only under very special conditions. So i did contacted him like you suggest and he replied “ok” after that i said “well hope you’re doing great,have a nice day” , then he said that he didn’t understand why i would contact him and said that he was “dead”. Then i said “that something reminded me of an event that we both found really funny and that it made me smile for a while and if it had bothered /confused him that i was actually sorry and said have a nice day and he didnt reply back. What should i do? Should i stop? Should i keep going ? It happened about a week ago.
admin
February 21, 2015 at 12:01 am
Hi Kelly, would you be willing to have this situation featured on the podcast?
Kelly -J
February 21, 2015 at 1:28 am
Yeah sure,but what does it mean exactly? Do i have to do something?
Kelly -J
February 22, 2015 at 4:50 pm
PlZ help me 🙁
admin
February 23, 2015 at 9:10 pm
With what specifically?
Morgan
February 19, 2015 at 10:47 pm
Hi. I dated my boyfriend for 10 months. After 5 he moved in for financial reasons. He has a daughter who would live with us for a week a month. He wasn’t a big drinker so I would occasionally got out with friends. I did the stupid thing and went through his phone and saw he texted an ex. I went off and he said he wanted to be with me not her. I got really insecure and twice came home after being out and yelled and tried to break up with him. Minus this we had the best relationship. He made me smile every day. So about two weeks before moving to a bigger apartment he tells me he’s moving in with a long time childhood girlfriend BC its better for his daughter. I try to support this but I’m dying inside. I get so emotional we barely speak the last two weeks. I told him to move out that as soon as possible when I asked if this was about us and he said that’s not what this is about over and over. I love this man but we haven’t spoken in two weeks. I texted him for his bday and good luck in court trying to get custody for his daughter and about 3 other times and nothing so I stopped this week. I want to be with him even though he is emotionally not all there. His daughter is his priority and I get that. I feel my emotions and insecurity about his ex pushed him away. Is there hope?
admin
February 20, 2015 at 11:40 pm
Well you really have to work on your anger over that.. I don’t think he did much wrong.
I think NC would work wonders for you to be honest.
Morgan
February 21, 2015 at 3:24 pm
Thank you I agree. Seeing I want you in my life to an ex might make anyone angry but if he said he wanted to be with me I have to trust him I guess. I hope NC works it’s been a week.
admin
February 22, 2015 at 4:55 pm
Its still so early..
Morgan
February 19, 2015 at 10:52 pm
I wanted to believe it wasn’t about us but I am thinking it was and his way of backing off. He’s very stubborn. I was financially and emotional there for both him and his daughter. I just don’t know what to think or believe BC I am heartbroken.
Morgan
February 19, 2015 at 11:31 pm
I should also add he said liked loved living with me. When I said at the end do you want to be with me he said not when your like this BC I was so emotional and couldn’t stop crying. He did text me back thank you to his bday and court message but nc to my other texts.
Alaina
February 19, 2015 at 4:12 am
Chris,
First off, I wanted to tell you that your website is very insightful. I read through a few of your posts and couldn’t agree more with you advices and observations!
That being said, I’m writing to see if you can offer some tips for my tangled situation. For the past year, I’ve been engaged to a man who loves me more than anything in the world. We’ve hit more than our fair share of bumps along the way. Mostly due to his mother, who has been unsupportive and now in frank opposition to our engagement/marriage. How she has treated me has hurt me tremendously, and I often found myself getting angry at the situation. Furthermore, my fiance has felt very torn between me and his mother, a widow who has developed an unhealthy, abnormal attachment to her son over the years. The wear and tear have taken a toll on both my fiance and I. We’ve been getting into so many intense arguments. We’ve had to change the wedding date several times. We’ve done virtually nothing in terms of preparing for the wedding.
About a month ago, i stopped contacting my fiance. It just happened naturally. The arguments we’ve had led us to naturally drift apart. I was also frustrated with his indecisiveness, and we were both extremely hurt in so many ways. My fiance has tried to reach me several times. I’ve yet to respond to him.
I stopped contacting him because I was hurt (by him and his mother), angry, and didn’t want to do or say anything to exacerbate the situation and regrettable. The sticky point here is that we need to cancel the wedding date (it’s supposed to be in a couple months), because we have nothing ready, and I can’t get married to him under these circumstances, so I do need to contact him at some point.
I don’t know what I want right now. I know that I don’t want to get married soon. But I don’t think I want to break up just now. Canceling the wedding date would probably lead to a breakup.
If we were just dating, it’d be easy to break up, take some time apart, and then consider getting back together. But given our circumstances, I’m not sure if it’s that easy.
I haven’t talked with my fiance, but I imagine he’s feeling a mix of emotions. He’s been very sad about the situation because he doesn’t want to let me go but doesn’t see a way for things to improve.
I’m throwing a very complicated case your way… But any kind of help and advice would be appreciated right now.
Thanks!
admin
February 20, 2015 at 11:11 pm
Would you be willing to send me a voicemail via my podcast so I can feature your situation?
Jenna Kile
February 18, 2015 at 8:37 am
So I sent the first type of text you say to send after I was finished with 30 days no contact and I got a really great response right away so after that I waited a few days and sent the second type of message you talked about and it’s been two days with no response from him. I’m so confused… what should I do? and why would he suddenly be ignoring me??
admin
February 18, 2015 at 9:51 pm
Ok, you need to take a step back here.
You need to slowly lead up to sending the second type of texts that you sent. You need to prime him a bit more before you send it.
Jenna Kile
February 19, 2015 at 8:45 am
Ok, how long should I wait before I send another text? I feel like he’s going to get overwhelmed if I do it too quickly and I don’t mind being patient about it at all. I’m just so confused because right after we broke up he said we might be able to get back together and then I got a good response with the first text. I feel hopeful one minute and then the next I feel like he’s never going to talk to me again. I’m afraid to bring up any happy memory between us in any way, because I feel like it almost overwhelms him. I don’t really know what’s going on with him or if I’m holding onto false hope or not.
admin
February 20, 2015 at 11:18 pm
Wait a day or two before you send the next one out.
Jenna Kile
February 22, 2015 at 12:27 am
He’s still not responding… what do I do now? What if he doesn’t plan on ever talking to me again
anna
February 17, 2015 at 9:36 am
My boyfriend broke up with me 6 month ago. At first he wanted nothing to do with me, then we started hanging out as friends. Then he told me had a girl friend, so i did the nc but for one week and he went crazy, wanted to see me and all, so we hoked up again, and then he told me that he was going to stay with his girl friend, that he had no feelings for me, when a week before he was telling all his friends that he missed me, that we were great together and that his new girl friend was a real pain.
So is there still hope, when he told me he had no feelings and told his friends the opposite? What should i do. When we are together, we just have so much fun, the problem is also that his family doesn’t want us to be together…
MartaS.
February 19, 2015 at 7:47 pm
I’m not an expert, not at all. I suggest you buy some online resource.
Anyway I feel for you and some things come to my mind: apologize for any mistake (es. I’m very sorry I contacted you even if our relationship ended. I realize the breakup was the best thing to do, even if I didn’t ask for it). Think about his bad qualities.
Pursue your own separate goals, show him you have your carreer, your friends, you have fun.
Then sometimes you can say you’ve been thinking about him, when you were at a party, at a concert on the mountains or whatever.
Also you can go to a public place where you find him and the new girl, you can use a wingwoman to attract him more, you can seem confident and flirty with your female friend, in a funny way. You can come close to his girl and introduce yourself, have a brief pleasant conversation and tell her he is completely free for her now.
Then you can leave with a calm smile…
See if he comes back to you.
Considering why his family doesn’t like you, you can choose wisely what to do. If his family thinks you could change in a more positive way, do it. But if they dismiss you for stupid reasons, you can think twice about going back there.
MartaS.
February 19, 2015 at 8:26 pm
I’m in a different situation from you, my ex’s family admires me but also encourages my ex to be too close to a female friend who envies all the things I have, badmouths me behind my back, flirts with my ex and many other things. My ex was always blind to details in social situations and blind to this girl’s maneuvers cinging to his parents and even his relatives. even contacting his other friends.
She tried to make me feel bad for 1 year with these things, and maybe she will persevere as long as she lives.
The only good advice I can give you, based on the satisfaction I feel is…
See yourself in a position of power. Put yourself in a position of power.
Also be grateful of the positive things you have, your positive qualities… Think of your career, your smile, your good family and friends, think of your ability to learn new things.
And do it, try new sports, languages, whatever you like.
Detach emotionally.
See yourself as a wonderful person who is learning to detach and to be happy with or without him.
Althea
February 17, 2015 at 7:10 am
Chris i need an advice. My story is quite different.
Sent you an email. Thank You.
admin
February 17, 2015 at 12:52 pm
I will check it out when I can!
Althea
February 17, 2015 at 1:57 pm
Thank you.
admin
February 18, 2015 at 9:15 pm
Your welcome!
Jess
February 16, 2015 at 4:19 pm
Hi chris
My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 year and we were planning to get engaged next year
And we had a very heated argument over texts on Friday because I complained about him not doing anything for Valentine’s every year. This argument got very heated and I made some outrageous comments which were horrible. These comments and names were targeted at his financial stability (which I know he is very sensitive about anyway). So on Friday he broke up with me after this argument and since then I tried the no contact rule but failed and end up messaging and calling him, asking to talk it through and sort it out in a calm manner. He did not reply to any of my messages and calls and has now ended up blocking my number completely. He did this before and after about 4 days of no talking he unblocked me and we spoke. We do have arguments like this usually and end up making up after not talking for a few days. Maybe this time I didn’t let anything cool down before I tried getting in touch with him
But this time I am much more worried because I made comments which I have never before about finance which he is very sensitive about. What would you recommend I do? Shall I just cut all contact myself with him and maybe try contacting him after 30 days? Thinking through it I do think he will eventually unblock me, as he can’t keep me blocked forever and not talk to me.
What would you recommend I do now as the next step?
Thank you for your help in advance
Shara
February 16, 2015 at 7:52 am
Hi Chris,I’m actually on my 10th day of NC, after a month of chasing my ex… Last January on our supposed to be monthsary I greeted him, I did it on a purposed so on our monthsary this February he would be expecting I would to the same and I’ll do the opposite. So I didn’t really greeted him or texted him. What happened is I just saw a post on his timeline saying “Game Over.Try loving again?Yes or NO?”,,, was it a good sign? Did I made him wonder why I did’t greet? Did the NC now having effect on him?
Shara
February 16, 2015 at 7:54 am
and the post was posted on the day of our supposed to be a monthsary…I was thinking maybe it’s a coincidence but he would not post it for nothing, right?
Tigger12345
February 16, 2015 at 3:53 am
Hi Chris,
My ex recently dumped me before we went on our valentines date because she said she wasn’t as happy as she used to be. We have been dating since high school for 15 months and we recently graduated. We started as best friends, and we talked almost everyday during the relationship. We had a few issues in the relationship, mainly me with her exes. A few nights before she dumped me we had an argument, I immediately regreted this and had an epiphany, realising it was unfair to bring up her exes in moments of weakness. During these last couple of weeks we’ve been feeling distant and even mentioned it, during this time she’s thought about where the relationship is going. The night she broke up with me was the night I was going to change everything, by admitting my faults and what I felt our relationship was lacking, obviously I never got the chance. After 2 days I broke the NC rule and asked her to speak with her in person in a couple of days so I could say all the things I intended to say that night. Should I cancel and restart the NC rule? Or should I tell her what planned during our valentines dinner? Please I love her so much and don’t want to lose her for good, I realised my mistakes and never got a chance to say them, it’s especially hard since we were so close and were each others best friend’s.
Tigger12345
February 16, 2015 at 3:58 am
I was also quite clingy and I accused her of cheating a couple times in the last month, this is due to my strong anxiety, which I realise is unfair and damaging. She even mentioned this during our recent scuffle. we rarely had fights during the relationship and usually it was my anxiety getting the better of me, which could’ve easily exhausted her.
Tigger12345
February 16, 2015 at 4:16 am
During the breakup I handled it as calmly as possible and told her that I respected her choice and even supported her. She frequently mentioned she was unsure and had been thinking about it the past couple of weeks, she cried frantically and said she couldn’t see where this was going and shes struggling to see a longterm future between us anymore. By handling it so maturely and calmly im hoping I may have even shocked her. Few months prior we had a massive argument during which I overreacted and smashed a plate, but handling the break up so well im hoping I shook her. We parted ways with our intended valentines gifts and kisses. I still believe this relationship can be saved, we still haven’t changed our relationship statuses, this could also be because it’s so fresh. Please, I love her so much and I know people just sigh because it’s a typical first love/ highschool relationship, but I truly love her and she was everything I ever wanted in a girl (trust me i’m really picky). I even saw myself possibly marrying her, and she did too mentioning throughout the relationship that if we were together in a few years she would. Just please tell me what my course of action is, tell her what I was intending too say or restart on the NC rule? I’m also worried that sleazy jerks will try to make moves on her.
Kind regards.
P.S. Sorry for the multiple posts, I realised I had more to say as I posted them.
Kitty
February 14, 2015 at 5:15 pm
Hi Chris I have been in a nc with my ex bf for abt 2 week plus but I was hospitalised when I was overseas for holiday and he knows abt it so he actually initial to text me and ask abt how am I feeling and what exactly Happen and also follow up the following day again. I know that it’s normal for even frds to show concern. So my reply was short and nonchalant. So right now shd I continue to have short conversation with him or continue to carry on nc so that will draw more space for him to chase or i shd take this opportunity to start a frd conversation with him?
admin
February 16, 2015 at 11:27 pm
Carry on until your time period is complete before you make contact!
Kitty
February 16, 2015 at 2:20 am
He has been texting me continuously for 4 days just asking how I feel and repeating saying take care and ask me rest well etc… hmmm what does it means?
Sarah
February 14, 2015 at 4:48 pm
Hey,
I was talking to a guy online for a year. When we first started taking i was living with an ex due to a Lease agreement so i putoff meeting up. Then things got bad i lost my job, got sick and moved home. I remained in contact with this guy everyda. And he called m. For hours on end. We got very close. I started focusing on my health he assured me he didn’t mind waiting and just wanted me to get better. Everything was going great untill two weeks ago. He went to stay with friends and contact became minimal he was rarely ever at home. I gave him space as he told me he was going mad been at home all the time and jus wanted to be with me but longer time goes by he cannot convince himself i will meet him. I tried to assure him i would meet him at the end of next month, we texted for a bit but he was still off. The next day we went back to barely taking and i barely had any contact from him that weekend except a reply saying he won’t lose interest in meeting me. Contact faded then to point he wouldn’t reply. I got angry as was almost 2 weeks now so i demanded answers or he talk to me to let me know where i stood or i would finish it as i felt he was messing me around. He eventually text back apologising saying he was at a friends again. He was sorry that he still liked me but something inside him changed and he lost faith in me meeting him. He then told me he spoke to friends about our situation and i should imagine how that went. Said he wished he could control it and say everything will be fine and we will be together but he can’t said he was sorry he can’t promise me anything and cares for me hopes i get better. . I responded saying i was sorry and i would not contact him again untill i was ready to meet and if he was with someone else by then fair enough. I said i would miss him. He never replied. I have heard nothing from him since and know due to my current circumstances i definitely cannot meet him untill the end of next month. How should i play this? He is already not expecting to talk to me as i told him that but also i know when i contact him he could have possibly moved on. Any advice
Beatrice
February 14, 2015 at 1:45 pm
Hi, I met a guy in a travelwebsite and we became interested with each other. He travelled to see me (quite expensive) and from there we decided to have a real thing. . It was really great despite the distance. Along the way he would bring up breaking up with me we managed to worked it out. Then one day he confessed that he lied about his age and that he is way older (actually I knew about it because you can google his name and see his background and piece out everything) and maybe it can be an issue with others but for me I understand why he did that. Anyways, a day after he confessed , I broke up with him because I was thinking maybe he doesnt want me or he wants someone else. But I want him back, I want us to have a clean slate. The thing is that we are in two different places.
admin
February 16, 2015 at 11:22 pm
How much older?
Victoria
February 13, 2015 at 1:56 pm
My boyfriend and I had been dating for about 2 years. We moved in together about 9 months into our relationship. We were great together. We never fought (2 fights ever) and we were inseparable. Everything seemed great until one day he sat me down and told me he was moving out. It came out of the blue. There was no warning at all. One minute we are laughing and kissing in the car on the way home and the next, I was crying from devastation. He really didn’t give me any reasons why other than that he didn’t want to be in a relationship anymore and wanted to find himself (I should mention that I’m about 5 years older than he is). He moved out that weekend and was couch surfing with friends and family for a couple months. During this time we would bump into each other through mutual friends, tell me about all his prospective apartment rentals and he even asked me to go furniture shopping with him and pick out the perfect matress for his new place. We’d see each other about once or twice a week. When he would see me he would kiss me, tell me he loves me and we would often still have sex. He finally moved into his own place on Feb.1st. That night he invited me over to have celebratory drinks. It was great. We had a couple drinks, listened to music, played games and enjoyed each others company. We ended up sleeping in each others arms, waking up and having morning sex and had a shower together. That’s when it all changed. After we got ready, he started ignoring me. He started organizing his belongings and when I asked if I could help him he said, “no”. After about 15 mins of awkward silence I asked if he wanted me to leave so he could get his place set up. He agreed. But went on to say that he doesn’t think that we should be friends anymore and we shouldn’t see each other or hangout alone. Again, I was shocked because we had just had a wonderful evening and morning together. I haven’t seen him since the 2nd. And have been giving him no contact since. But I just found out through a mutual friend that he has been talking to a coworker of his and is interested in her and is now perusing her. They talk and text all day long and snapchat pictures and videos to each other. It’s been less than 2 weeks. I realize this is probably a rebound but it hurts me so much. I don’t know what to do. I want him back. Any suggestions? Is it worth it to try? I’m so lost, hurt and confused.