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The Complete Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back
How To Make Him Miss You After A Breakup
The Ungettable Girl
The No Contact Rule (The Definitive Guide)
The Male Mind During The No Contact Rule
The Male Mind AFTER The No Contact Rule
What Your Ex Boyfriend Says Vs. What He Really Means
Here’s Exactly What He’s Thinking During The No Contact Rule
What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Blocks You
Signs My Ex Wants Me Back
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Morgan
March 30, 2015 at 8:45 pm
My, boyfriend and I have been together for 8 yea rs and he just broke up with me a week ago, saying he’s not in love with me.
I cooked, cleaned,anything he wanted I did for him. If he needed to use my car or needed money, or a shoulder to cry on, I was there for him. He was my best friend. We loved the same things, foods, and activities.
So when he said he didn’t love me anymore I was confused. He said “it’s not you, it’s me.”
But he says he still loves me (not in love with me) he cares about me,and he still wants to be friends. I recently found out he’s already “talking” to someone else but “not like that”.
I’m completely lost and confused. I love him so much and I don’t know what to do.
Mo
March 30, 2015 at 2:46 am
My bf broke up with me a few months ago; he said he didnt feel the love for me that was once there. He says he wants to be a little selfish and take some time to himself to figure out why hes feeling this way. We had been together for 6 years and I moved 2000 miles away from home to be closer to his family recently. I know no one out here and feel lost. We have still lived together for financial reasons, but hes moving out at the end of April. He keeps saying he wants to still contact me and sort out his feelings so when we do get back together, he is sure of himself. I feel like no contact would be best, but Im not sure how to bring it about. We had a great relationship and this definitely hit me by surprise. I do want it to work out between us. He is my best friend.
Jess
March 29, 2015 at 2:13 pm
So my ex and I broke up at the end of January we were together for almost a year. After a series of unfortunate events, I lost my cousin to cancer in November he lost his uncle and friend in December. My ex started to become distant. He became more worried about money and future and everything between us went downhill from there. We have had little to no contact since then. Two weeks after we broke up we were supposed to take a trip together one that was planned and payed for by me and he decided that it was best to not go. Leaving me out a lot of money and a trip to take alone. I can forgive most of this. I’m just wondering with him completly ignoring me and not even trying to have any contact with me worth putting myself out there for him or should I just walk away? He doesn’t seem interested anymore.
admin
March 29, 2015 at 3:17 pm
Well, either way i am happy to help.
My theory is you give it your all first and then if you decide to move on I can show you the path to doing that.
C
March 29, 2015 at 3:03 am
(Starting a new comment so this doesn’t get lost in the crowd)
About to close out day 10 of NC. 20 more to go. It’s weird cause in some ways it’s easy, and in some ways it’s hard. I keep thinking of everything that has lead up to our demisr and it makes me run through the gambit of emotions, questions, and what I REALLY want come the time. I still miss everything about him, I always loved him and all his faults. But then I’m reminded of how he said he’s been unhappy despite not showing it otherwise, that he can’t trust my word (even though I never did anything to warrant that necessarily…or I guess he should have explained what he meant specifically), how I’ve been ignoring him (again, odd accusation since I talked to him practically everyday), and it makes me mad and scared.
But then I remember how things in his life as of lately have been messed up: his job (cut hours AND put on probation), family issues, him kicking his roommate out, financial struggles. He even recently said he’s starting to feel “depressed” about himself. Just feels like I was the last piece he’s pushing out of his life and there’s not much I can do. Up until then, he said he can relax around me and basically can escape from his problems, that I was the only person who was drama-free and brought him peace. When he found out he was getting some time off work, he gave me the biggest hug. He was so happy. Then the following week is when everything went sideways.
He says he’s tired of being alone (he wants to live together, but never seems invested in participating in the process no matter what I say), yet it seems like he’s doing everything to be just that. He hasn’t tried to contact me but he is a stubborn (and somewhat clueless) man, so I’m not surprised. And actually because he said I haven’t been calling him enough, that’s even more of a reason for him not to do so. Although he did say to call him in two months and “maybe” we can talk. That statement is seriously going to loom over me until we talk again cause I don’t know how to honestly take that coming from him. Especially right now.
I’m still functioning, I do have a number of things keeping me occupied (by coincidence actually lol). But I’d be lying if I said I’m not still royally confused. I feel a piece of myself is missing. I do think about the many ways I messed up from a guy’s perspective (now that I’ve found this site!) and if I get the chance, I will show him I am trustworthy. I do hope, however, he also understand he’s not without his faults and maybe cut me some slack instead of hurling all the bad onto me (which I never would do, nor ever DID, to him). And no, when I talk to him, I’m not gonna berate him cause we’d end up back to how this started. I just hope somewhere in him he realizes that I’ve always been his number one fan. I’d never betray him. That focusing on the bad isn’t going to get anywhere. He doesn’t have to love/want me if that’s truly in his heart, but we have to move forward either way (and he’s bad at holding on to the negative. Or he never deals with it like it doesn’t affect him).
Oh and as an added bonus: during our break up talk, he said something to the effect of “I don’t want us to wait too long before it’s too late to be with other people!” Now Chris…he’s 34 and I’ll be 32 at the end of the year. As upset as I was, I dang near pissed myself laughing (to myself) when he said that cause that was SOOOO overly dramatic that it seemed unreal that that was what he truly wanted to say lol. He was on a roll and that just fell out of his mouth. I’ve been dumped a number of times and I have to say that’s the funniest line I’ve heard thus far!!!
admin
March 29, 2015 at 2:10 pm
Huh…
That breakup reasoning makes no sense from him.
I wouldn’t say its a funny line its a stupid one.
C
March 29, 2015 at 4:11 pm
That’s actually what I meant, funny as in stupid lol. I mean I have heard some really funny things, but this honestly came out like a stretch (hence why I don’t think he said what he really meant).
Now when you say his reasoning makes no sense, do you mean this is an unusual situation in the guy world? Or because he sounds wishy-washy? Cause wishy-washy people (coupled with stubbornness) are more difficult to deal with by default. And even though I’m only day 11 into NC, I’m still thinking of my next step(s) at how to approach him.
kayle
March 28, 2015 at 3:15 pm
me and my ex were so happy together, I could never imagine him breaking up with me. he did all the cute things girls want boys to do. he would surprise me with flowers and balloons and take me to the movies when I had a bad day. he always told me how much he loved me. a few months later I had to move a few states away, but only for three months. before I moved he always talked about how scared he was that I was going to leave him and he begged me not to find someone els and that he will always love me. after a month of moving away we got into a fight and we broke up, he said it was only so he can focus on school, I was okay with that. then I find out he’s talkinh to another girl and kissing her and telling her how beautiful she is and it broke my heart. he had to choose between me and her. during that time he would always text me how he screwed up and he wants me back because what we had was so perfect, but he wouldn’t take me back? instead he chose her. and that’s where I am today. I haven’t texted him all day bc im starting the no contact rule and he keeps texting me “I know you don’t like me but I want to say good morning Kayle” or “hey how are you doing?” do I just keep ignoring him? I know I need to get myself together because I haven’t been able to eat for a week but idk how to get myself back on track bc I have no friends down here or nothing to do bc I just moved away from all my friends.
Monica
March 27, 2015 at 11:08 pm
My boyfriend and I had been dating for 2 1/2 years. Basically out of the blue, he broke up with me. I think it was because I was overly jealous. We’ve been broken up for about a month now and then he tried to contact me, we hung out twice and he told me he wanted to work on getting back together, then I heard that he had been hanging out with two other girls, exclusively from another friend. I confronted him and he freaked out on me and we got into a huge fight which basically ended in us telling each other we hated each other. Would I still be able to take these steps in order to get him back? Or are we too broken? I know I still love him and I regret telling him I hate him but I’m too scared to text him and apologize even thought I know I was in the wrong. I feel like it’s too late andi don’t know what to do. Please help.
admin
March 29, 2015 at 2:34 pm
Yes you still can!
Ro
March 27, 2015 at 3:01 am
Hi,
I’m actually quite scared of the whole No-Contact rule, but only for one reason. This is because he told me that he’d be happy for me If I found someone else, or if I’ve moved on (In this case I’d be pretending to move on to not seem like an obsessed crazy ex). He just simply doesn’t think we’re right for each other but I felt everything with him, and I knew he did too. I just feel like he’s the right one. But there’s no possible way of making him jealous, or at least I don’t think.. What do I do if he’s completely forgotten me and is uninterested in me by the time I’ve changed and completed the No-Contact rule?
admin
March 29, 2015 at 3:02 pm
Its a bit of a rarity for that to happen.
Also, there are subtle ways to remind him of you during NC.
Ro
April 2, 2015 at 12:08 am
What do you suggest that I do? I’m about two weeks into the NC, and I’m quite proud of myself, but he hasn’t contacted me, and I feel as if he’s lost interest already. I see him every day, but we never talk. We always exchange glances, but I don’t know what that means. I still have deep feelings for him.
Jessica
March 26, 2015 at 11:44 pm
So I have dated this guy for about 2 months and he called me two days ago and said that it’s over and I asked why because just a little less then a week ago he took me to meet his grandma and we had the best time. During the time we were staying at his grandmas for a couple days he told me that I was the only girl for him and that no one will ever replace me, also that he thinks that we will be together forever and told me how much he loved me. He also took me to meet his parents about two weeks before this. He told me after I asked why he is breaking up with me, that he realized that I’m not the one for him and that apparently our conversations always lead to talking about sex, which yes some of them did but not all of them. I was so shocked when he told me this that I couldn’t get any words out so he said well I’m gonna hang up now and I managed to get out ok while crying a little and he said ok well bye he sounded a little sad while saying that. I haven’t texted him ever since that phone call but it’s definitely hard. We both have Facebook and are still friends on there and he hasn’t taken the relationship status that is on there about us being in a relationship and the picture that he took of me while at his grandmas that he posted on there is still on there so I’m sure that’s a good thing? I changed my profile picture to a different and better picture of me and I noticed that right after I did he changed his also so I’m guessing he is checking my profile? I would love some advice on how to get him back because I care about him a lot and love him so much.
Jessica
March 27, 2015 at 12:52 am
I just seen on the dating site that we meet off of that he changed his picture on there too so I don’t know if that means that he is already moving on or if he is just trying to make me jealous or something ? But now it’s even harder to not text him or try and ask if we can just start over. I’m feeling more hurt now then ever. I just want us back 🙁 everything was going really good and I don’t know what made him think that he doesn’t want to be together anymore.
Jessica
March 27, 2015 at 1:08 am
Sorry I also forgot to add that just two days before he broke up with me we had agreed on me moving in with him and getting a job there. He said that he would be so excited for me to live with him so I’m confused about what happened in just them two days.
P
March 26, 2015 at 7:27 pm
Hi, i was reading your website because i just recently broke up with my bf & its been 3 wks now. I had my reasons, we’ve been together for 3 years But for the last 2 years we lived 4 hours apart. I was finally ready to move over there with him since he didnt want to move here with me…but he kept putting things on hold. So i just ended it. I kept blaming it on myself tho thinking maybe i was too much…but now sometimes we’ll txt but he just doesnt seem to care about me & i also admitted to him that i still miss him & love him but he does respond how he feels…It sucks since he lives in a big city where you can get over a break up & while i live in a small depressing town…So now what? I want to go on vacation where he lives. Should i ask to meet up? I just feel like i made the wrong decision.
admin
March 31, 2015 at 9:53 pm
Just ask him out, out of the blue like that?
Not sure its a good idea without building rapport.
Abbey
March 26, 2015 at 8:47 am
I found out my ex was seeing a girl while still seeing me/with me. After almost two years together he leaves me by not even saying or telling me why. I did become the crazy girlfriend at the end because he just sto contacting me all together. He blocked me from all social media & from his phone. It’s been almost a month since I called or wrote him & to see a picture on Facebook with a girl & him together saying something like ” in love” I did go against all things & write her. I did this because like you said in the NC month things could change. Well my heart hasn’t changed but my mind & self respect has. You see I was married for 8 years before all this & my ex husband had an affair & left me for another woman. The dating world has been very crazy & hard for me. But this whole thing with the guy & getting him back. I’m not sure that a woman should want him back after him leaving & immediately start dating another girl. Or dating her at the same time. The whole rebound thing.
So it looks like there is no hope for myself & my ex boyfriend that I was trying the NC with because I don’t think I want a man that can do something like this. I’m really not sure why I’m writing all this. I guess deep down I’m still looking for answers as to why a guy/man would do this & if I did the right thing by letting it all go & throwing it out the window with writing the new girlfriend? I guess I at the same time know that I don’t want that kind of man in my life.
admin
March 31, 2015 at 8:25 pm
Ya I am not a fan of writing the new girlfriend… haha.
Abbey
March 31, 2015 at 8:30 pm
So I’m guessing there is no hope now with me writing her?
Abbey
April 6, 2015 at 10:58 am
Hi can you please let me know if I can still apply the NC rule? It seems that he is now with this new girl. I have had his friends tell me that they say their in love and are posting pictures everyday about how in love they are. So I know I contacted the new girlfriend after finding out about her. My question is.
1. Can I still do the NC rule?
2. Is this a rebound or are they really in love?
Abbey
March 29, 2015 at 7:34 am
So my ex is dating this girl he was seeing while with me. :/ all of this is all so hurtful & confusing. One minute I’m ok & ready to move on & the next I’m a mess. I do see its arebound, well that’s what I’m guessing? He was with me & seeing her. Not sure where to go from here. Do I try this again because I did backslide & write the girl or do I just move on?
Rushali
March 26, 2015 at 6:09 am
I had a break up a month ago.We are college students n our parents found bout us.His parents hit him n he acted weird the next day when we met after this matter.He didnt even tell me what happened with his parents.i found our later.He didnt talk properly so I got angry n went home n texted him that we should break up bcoz I deserve better.Ofcourse I didnt mean it.I was angry.Since then we are not talking like before n he says he wants to change .He says he doesn’t want any relation n that he wants to be single.He also said that he doesn’t want anyone n he is happy .nothing is clear n I end up thinking bout him all the time.I can’t get him out of my head.I want to move on but I also really like him n want him back….What do I do?
Sara
March 26, 2015 at 2:56 am
Hello!
My ex and I dated for a year and a week exactly and broke up about 3 and a half weeks ago. We had just happily celebrated our one year anniversary. We exchanged really nice gifts to each other and went on a very romantic date and talked about the future together and the next anniversaries we’d spend together. Then, a week later, we had a fight due to my stubbornness, pride, and selfishness. He was only worrying for my safety and I wouldn’t listen to him. We often had silly fights that would either become hurtful or mean to each other. Most of the fights were so petty that I don’t remember the cause of them anymore. He broke up with me after the fight we had after ignoring me for an entire day and told me that he “just didn’t see us going anywhere” even if we talked about the future together a week beforehand.
Since then, I wrote him a week after to apologize for what I said to him when he broke up with me. Things like how I “hated him” and for him to not talk to me again. I told him that that wasn’t true and he wrote back a few days later to thank me for the apology that he is hurt, angry and sad but is glad for our relationship.
He wrote me a week later to tell me that he was thinking of me and asked how I was doing, to which I made the mistake of responding and telling him I was fine and thinking of him too.
We have to see each other every day because we go to the same college and are in the same major. I’ve ignored him, haven’t texted him or made any sort of contact with him besides what I mentioned. I love him a lot, but it’s hard to move on when we have the same friends and social group. I want him back and I know we can fix the issues we had even though he said he never gives second chances while we were in the relationship. I took him for granted and he runs away from his problems and quite possibly very stubborn. Am I on the right track? Is this even possible?
admin
March 31, 2015 at 8:17 pm
You are on the right track.
My advice would be to consume this site outside of this article (which I think you might be doing already.)
Jo
March 25, 2015 at 12:09 am
Hi, so I have a more complicated issue than just the whole wanting to get back together with my ex thing. We dated for almost six months and then one day he just broke up. We had been through a big ordeal in the previous months as he lost his brother in a tragic accident. I was there for him the whole time and we became closer than I had ever been to someone before. His reasons were that he didn’t want to string me along and he felt like I wasn’t interested anymore and he said he wasn’t interested in me. So we didn’t talk for like two months. Then after that period of time, he texted me out of the blue saying how sorry he was and how stupid he was and asked for a second chance. Obviously I said ok but we needed to build back a relationship as friends first. We talked for the next two weeks and hung out a couple of times but then he just cut me off completely. This was three weeks before Christmas, he wouldn’t even meet my eyes when we passed by each other. Then in January he sent me a screen shot of one of my past messages that I sent him when we were dating that was basically me telling him how much I loved him and he said “God I miss this” so I talked to him about it but firmly stated that that was in the past and reminded him of our agreement to be friends. I really still cared for him a lot but I was afraid that he would just lose interest again. So after talking for another short period of time, he cut me off again. Now a month and a half later he sent me the same picture with no comment. When I asked him what his purpose in sending this was, he responded by saying that he just saw it again. I told him to stop toying with my emotions. But I guess my real question is, does his behavior have to do with the loss of his brother or is he just being a jerk? I still have feelings for him, I mean it seems like we have been to hell and back together, but is it time for me to just let it all go or should I keep trying? I’m feeling frustrated and hurt! Please some advice?
admin
March 31, 2015 at 7:08 pm
I say try it again and then if it doesn’t work this time around we can focus on moving on.
Jesse
March 23, 2015 at 9:15 pm
Hi Chris
My ex of 4 months broke up with me cause I texted him too much cause he wouldn’t answer me after not seeing each other for 3 weeks. His excuse is that he works 2 jobs.i got mad and told him i was done. The next day I tried calling him. And he texted me. Never text or call him again. I told him I was sorry. So I left him alone for a week. I texted him he answered. He said that he misses me but I’m too much all over him and he can’t handle that. And if I wanted to hook up and have a good time but that’s it cause he can’t be in a relationship with me.
Does this mean he never wanted a relationship. Or can I fix things?
admin
March 25, 2015 at 7:51 pm
You may have come on too strong.
Do you think there was truth to his statement about you being too much all over him.
yy
March 29, 2015 at 4:27 pm
the above statement is true for me… he never told me so but even myself can feel so. how do I fix this? we broke up for 3 weeks till now and didn’t really get into contact.
Jesse
March 25, 2015 at 9:08 pm
Hi chris. Only when i didnt see him 3 weeks. I was telling him i needed to see him but he said he calls me and tect me everyday till hes available cause he has businesses and work.
C
March 22, 2015 at 6:47 pm
My boyfriend just recently broke up with me after years of dating. Things were relatively Ok, but for the past three weeks or so, he’d been acting kind of snippy and oddly sarcastic (I say “oddly” because we’re both kind of sarcastic people. It was just different, like bitter sarcasm). Now…in these past three weeks, a few changes had been going on, the biggest ones being his hours were severely cut at his job AND he was put on temporary probation within the week. Needless to say, I could definitely understand why he wasn’t happy, but he didn’t initially direct it toward me. When we were together physically–like, in the same room, nothing seemed wrong between us. But on the phone, that’s where that odd sarcasm kicked in to the point I snapped back.
A few days ago is when the break up happened. And although the reasons weren’t a surprise to me, they seemed somewhat out of left field (he said I hadn’t been calling him enough lately. Which was true. BUT I also had laryngitis for like four months, and he knew I did. Also…and this is a big one…he’s been wanting to live together. As do I. But he kept putting everything on me, whereas I was saying this should be a joint venture, if that makes sense.) Anyways, there was arguing on both sides, but it actually wasn’t really heated. In a way, we were agreeing but playing tug-o-war. Even I can admit it was weird lol. So because it wasn’t heated, I guess it was fairly amicable. However…
I did tell him I didn’t want it to end. I was very upfront about my feelings for him, going so far as to calmly begging for another chance (seriously, this wasn’t the archetypical argument/ break up here). Initially he said no chance and tried to nicely hung up. But I did ask if we could be friends, because there didn’t seem to be any animosity there. This is where I got confused.
Without missing a beat he said, “You can call me in two months, then MAYBE we can talk.” Then I asked (kind of jokingly), “Ok how come I have to call???” He respond, “Or I guess I can too.”
Soooo…how should I take that? Because I never wanted the relationship to end, obviously I’m going to latch onto any sliver of hope. But that last bit of the conversation has me going back and forth. It was after this that I found out about the No Contact thing because I was just thinking that was it and he’s just saying anything to get me to hang up. But that time frame is so specific…
admin
March 24, 2015 at 8:04 pm
I think you can still do NC despite all this to be honest.
C
March 24, 2015 at 8:22 pm
Thank you for responding. Should I do the 30 day NC or the “two month” NC he kind of threw out there? I was contemplating calling him after I came back from a vacation that been planned with friends a while back (it’s next weekend), which would put me a roughly day 18-21, but…I’m actually feeling fairly Ok and it hasn’t even been a week lol. ESPECIALLY since just yesterday I got a text from a friend who may be giving me the first steps into my dream job: video game writer! So I’ve been super elated since yesterday thinking about this prospect (and it wouldn’t hurt to have those brownie points whenever I confront my ex, right?)
Anyways, I ask which NC route because he specifically said two months (and this is coming from someone who doesn’t really communicate that well unless under stress), yet just a few weeks ago he complained how I wasn’t calling him enough. Had this been a few days ago, I’d probably going stir crazy waiting for 30. But now I’m Ok waiting for 30, test call him, then go from there.
C
March 22, 2015 at 7:29 pm
Just remembered to add something (sorry).
During our breakup conversation, he told me he hasn’t been happy for a while. No time frame was mentioned. Yet when we were together, he never once acted like there was anything wrong. We would laugh and joke just like before. He told be he’s tired of being lonely (I guess referring to us not living together). That made me feel so hurt for him because I NEVER wanted him to feel like that. The No Contact rule I was going to respect anyways since I didn’t want to jeopardize whatever possibility between us (another thing I told him in my emotional state). And I’m only…oh, day four, into it. But after reading your article, and one from another source, I actually started feeling loads better because it makes sense. I just hope that that “two months” wasn’t some wayward statement that was thrown out there.
C
March 23, 2015 at 9:00 pm
All right, day five. And the only reason I’m writing this is because I keep feeling emotional shifts. Side note: I think it’d be interesting if there was a timeline of emotional changes during the 30-day NC process. I’ve been reading other people’s stories on here, many reminiscent of mine. It’s intriguing seeing everyone’s feelings at different points during NC. If I were to write this (I have a Bachelor’s in Communication), I feel like I’m in “The First Stages of Epiphany.”
I’ve been thinking, a lot, about everything between us. I go from calm to swirling thoughts. Even though my ex is really bad at communication (like REALLY bad lol) I now can admit that I do remember some things he said here and there. Hints. But because he was never consistent, the hints weren’t clear. See…we haven’t been intimate for a while, and it had nothing to do with lack of desire. Quite the opposite…which is actually worse than if we were just doing it mechanically with no emotions.
Neither one of us lives alone, and we’re both on the introverted side. So that level of privacy wasn’t there, which meant we weren’t, you know. I would suggest going to a hotel, but he was highly resistant. And I truly don’t know why exactly. In fact, anything I suggested he had some issue with. Yet if he had an idea, I *should* just go with it. For the most part I did because it didn’t bother me. But it DID irk me how he seemingly would undermine my ideas.
In turn, I turned into his cheerleader and not his fellow teammate. I did express this, and he expressed his side (this is going back to the tug-o-war argument above). So as I sit here thinking through my NC, I’ve been mentally listing issues brought up by both sides. It still amazes me that we agree yet chase the proverbial tail. He wanted me to be the woman from before (which I realize I kind of morphed from but can get back to), and I just wanted him to listen to me, acknowledge my ideas, and not blow them off by saying “We’ll see.”
The epiphany: I don’t know what’s to happen, I’m still only on day five. But it has hit me how stupidly simple change can be if one wishes to genuinely change. The severe lack of intimacy, as he told me, made him feel unwanted. And it didn’t matter how many times or different ways I tried to prove that it wasn’t true. But I didn’t give him what he asked for, what he needed. He needed me to share that most intimate of moments with him, and I hid out of environmental self-consciousness. It makes me sick how blindly selfish I had become and don’t blame him for wanting out. By no means am I trying to take all the weight, but I do see at least a basic fault I can correct (he said he couldn’t trust my word anymore because I didn’t come correct with some things I said I’d do). I don’t know how I can regain that trust, if I even can. But if I can, I WILL do anything to get it. He deserves that.
Tara
March 22, 2015 at 8:05 am
Hi,so me and my boyfriend broke up exactly a week ago. I have been feeling very low because of this as we were very close and have been going out a year and had no problems. He had told me that he had depression and stuff and I tried to help him by always telling him I was there for him and giving him advice. Then he turned around one day and told me he couldn’t cope with being in the relationship anymore. Prior to this we had a small disagreement but nothing you would break up over. I stopped talking to him but yesterday our football team were playing and I missed it so I asked him what the score was. We talked for a bit and then it progessed into him telling me that he feels so much better. I really cannot get my head around this.all I want is to get back together so that things can go back to normal. He told me that it was the distance thing that got him but it never was a problem until recently however, I am moving to the city were he lives in September and he is aware of this
We will be able to see each other a lot more…
admin
March 22, 2015 at 5:44 pm
I think you are primed to be in a position to get him back if you are indeed moving to his city down the road but you need to be extra careful to take things slowly.
Sarah Buckland
March 22, 2015 at 7:44 am
Hi chris, i keep trying to buy the ebook and your website keeps saying my email is invalid. Ive tried 3 different emails (@gmail, @hotmail.com and @live.com) and they all come back as invalid??
I really want this ebook as everything you say makes sense and i want to put your advice into practice – but i cant figure out how to buy it
is there any other way of getting this???
admin
March 22, 2015 at 5:43 pm
That is super bizarre…
No one else seems to be having issues.
Are you located in the states or are you in another country?
Sarah Buckland
March 22, 2015 at 7:46 am
Feel free to delete this comment afterwards, i had no other way to get in touch sorry
admin
March 22, 2015 at 5:43 pm
No way!
I want to help you as much as I can get this book.
Hannah
March 21, 2015 at 8:29 pm
Hi, I did NC for 30 days (he did not contact me either)and after that I started first contact. I wrote (sorry for the Imperfect translation from German to English): “Something strange happenend to me…” 2 minutes later he wrote: “What happened?” And then I wrote: “I found a Mango Candy in one of my trousers. I immediatly had to think about when we were together in this Asian Supermarket in Vancouver. We were Standing in front of the Candies and we found out that we both know These Mango Candies. You from Malaysia and I from Canada! How small the world is…”
After that he didn’t write anymore… This was 5 days ago. What shall I do now? He still has got my things and I have still some things of him and his keys…
admin
March 22, 2015 at 5:28 pm
Hmm… I liked your message but I think maybe the “something strange happened part” threw him off.
You should only do that as a last resort.
I would have just led with the candies.
Hannah
March 23, 2015 at 9:35 pm
I contacted him again today and he replied. And he asked for a meeting to talk about the breakup, etc. And basically he said it’s not you, it’s me… (well 5 weeks before it was the other way round..) I’ve read your article on this…
OMG I’m nervous… Do you have some advice for me?
Hannah
March 21, 2015 at 8:30 pm
Oh ok, my question is not about the keys, it’s just what shall I do now…
T
March 21, 2015 at 12:34 pm
Hi Chris. So my boyfriend of 2.5 years just ended our relationship and I was so heartbroken and confused. He said he’s falling out of love with me (listened to your podcast on that) but I’m so confused. I know now I didn’t appreciate him enough-was very critical and easily upset, but after a particular fight a week before we talked and decided to make positive changes to our relationship and everything seemed fine. I just don’t understand how he could tell me he loved me and didn’t want to end us, and then literally 2 hours later he said he didn’t know what he wanted and needed space. We agreed to do NC but only for 2 weeks and then we would talk. I saw him a few days later with another girl and was crushed. I could really use any advice you have.
anon
March 21, 2015 at 3:19 am
Hi,
I was in a relationship for a short while, and it was great until he was acting badly one evening on a group outing with friends. I addressed his behaviour and we had a small argument- nothing serious- and all was resolved. He went quiet for a few days which wasn’t normal, so I suggested we meet to talk. But before I could say anything, he told me he wanted to end things. I feel it was a rash decision and the argument could have had some part in it.
It’s been a few days since the breakup, I’ve not been feeling sorry for myself, and I’ve been tagged in photos out with my friends on social media since then.
I respect his decision and want to give both him and myself space. But I can’t help but feel the breakup was somewhat out of the blue and not well thought through, and I’d like to reconnect with him at a later date.
After I complete my 30 day NC period, I’d like to send him a text to remind him of the fun we had. We both loved to laugh and tell jokes, and I used to text him a joke now and then. Would it be a good idea to break the ice with a joke I know he’d love? I’m worried that it wouldn’t leave much room to instigate a conversation, but I want to remind him of how much I made him laugh.
Thanks.