Popular posts
The Complete Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back
How To Make Him Miss You After A Breakup
The Ungettable Girl
The No Contact Rule (The Definitive Guide)
The Male Mind During The No Contact Rule
The Male Mind AFTER The No Contact Rule
What Your Ex Boyfriend Says Vs. What He Really Means
Here’s Exactly What He’s Thinking During The No Contact Rule
What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Blocks You
Signs My Ex Wants Me Back
Recent posts
How To Know If An Avoidant Is Using You
Signs An Avoidant Will Come Back After Losing You
Why Avoidants Don’t Want Relationships
Do Avoidants Fight For A Relationship?
An Avoidant Will Feel Instant Regret If You Do This
Signs An Avoidant Is Hiding Deep Feelings For You
Why Avoidants Say Things That Don’t Make Sense
The Weird Things Avoidants Do When They Like You
What Happens To An Avoidant During No Contact?
How A Secure Handles An Avoidant Pulling Away
Post categories
Katrina
June 20, 2014 at 9:10 pm
We spoke once or twice during the first two weeks after the break-up. Now it has been over 2 months. We broke up for reasons we both agreed with, but when we broke up, he said to me, “hopefully this isn’t forever” and “this time apart will make us stronger if we do get back together, you will see”. About 2 weeks after we broke up, he started seeing someone new, he unfriended me on Facebook. His parents love me and still talk to me all the time and tell me how much they miss me and that he was stupid, etc. What do I do? I honestly don’t want to push things.
Heartbroken
June 20, 2014 at 2:11 am
Hi I just wanted to know if there’s anyway that my ex will come back. We broke up officially on May 21, 2014 just days after my b-day. He was playing mind games with me that drove me insanely crazy. He met a girl at work and had been texting/talking to her a lot but hid it from me. I found msgs from him telling her things like she gorgeous and sexy and the most amazing person he’s ever met. He hadn’t been telling me any of those things in months. He constantly started lying about little things. Then he started deleting msgs to and from her and telling me that he stopped talking to her. We started to fight more and more. She went on a trip and bought him gifts and he too started buying her things. I kept asking what’s going on between them and he just said they are friends. My gutt and other signs told me differently. They started making lunches for eachother and he stopped doing things for me. The mind games he played kept getting more and more worse to the point I stabbed myself infront of him because the pain was just too much to take. And then after that he said i was just giving you 10 mins to see if you would do that. If you didn’t we would be working on our problems. I can’t believe he drove me to do something so stupid. And what’s even more foolish is that I still love him. (We were together for 7 years). He left me for her. Now he doesn’t talk to me at all. What do I do? When we first met, we were so connected like we felt we knew eachother forever. I can’t function and I’m dying inside while he’s having the time of his life. Mind you the girl he left me for was or is on a relationship. They both planned leaving me and her other half. I want him back but at the same time I don’t know. This is the second time. The first time he came back. What should I do?
Heartbroken
June 20, 2014 at 2:15 am
Please help me anyone
Nikki
June 18, 2014 at 10:11 pm
chris Help
I made a very fatal error. All was going well but, when he pushed a button I unleashed a little of the green eyed monster and told him that his new relationship probably wouldn’t work out I know it slipped and wished I could take it back I apologized and just said it was just me being jealous but I will get over it to make light of the mistake. I believe it did upset him. But he seemed over it the next day, did I just ruin my chances with him to reconcile, or push him to make it work with the rebound girl (please keep in mind he started this relationship right after our break up and we had been together for a 1 1/2 yrs before the breakup) I hope I didn’t hurt my chances but please give me some insight to a guys thoughts. I know he somewhat expected this reaction, hell I think he did it to get the reaction probably feeling me out. But I quickly disbursed my outburst and I hope that it didn’t ruin any future chances of reconciliation thoughts????
laila
June 17, 2014 at 2:29 pm
hey , so my bf broke up after 3 yrs . he broke up before and came back , now again he broke up . m not sure he will come back this time . i called after 2 week and he is still angry ,
he says he has moved on and i should too !! i askd him when nd who she is , he said its not important to tell me ! 🙁 i feel he said that he is seeing sum1 just to push me away ???? he just wants to throw me away from his life
he said he dosent want to look back .
i feel if i do no contact rule he will think m over him or worse : move onn , i feel he already has.. he said no1 is there for him when he needs sum1 , i was always there . he has some family probs and i caree soo much for him . But he cant see it .
he thinks he can ignore me 2 weeks , so he can even do that for 2 years !! he is sooo rude n stubborn
i want him back bad !!
i cannot study for my post grad exams , i am in such a mess !!
i dont want him to find someone better and move on because i do the No Contact . he told me to never call him back nd his new gf dsnt like it , he even blocked my number
all i want is things like before !!
i dont knw what to say or do to make it right !! i dont want to lose him forever !!!
please help mee !! i am a mess here .
laila
June 18, 2014 at 8:07 am
Someone PLEASE reply !!! m gettin paranoid over here !!! 🙁
admin
June 18, 2014 at 2:04 pm
Hi there, whats up?
laila
June 17, 2014 at 2:38 pm
also in 3 years he never took me out or hardly met me or never ever got me anythg , but i still love him madly !!! whtever time he spoke to properly were best times of my life . i want to relive them back soo bad .
i actully got angry at him ad screamt so all this happend !!!! u thnk hes faking the gf or wht ??? i told him sorry million times and begged .
without him my life is empty as hell . all i do is cry and eat painkillers .
i shoud be studyn for smthg so imp right now and m stuck crying .
also this was my first bf .
kayla
June 20, 2014 at 7:19 pm
I understand that this guy was your first boyfriend? Well we all have a first and yes it is easy to fall in love with your first boyfriend! the best thing to do is call up your girlfriends go hangout and try to forget about him for a night after you get back go home relax or even stay over at a friends house!! nobody is worth eating painkillers over its not worth risking your life I promise!
randol
June 16, 2014 at 9:40 pm
My boyfrend en i had bin dating fo almost 3 years after an argument he dcides to break up wit me. He asked me fo space en dat he wanted to b alone fo somtym. Little did i knw dat he was seeing another gal evn bfo he dumped me en is now wit her….i ask him en he sayz dey wer jst frendz bfo en evrythng is jst hapening too fast. I hav complitly stopt contacting him cud dat b a rebound relationship or mayb hes in love do i stil stand a chance?
Lana
June 15, 2014 at 6:40 pm
Well I was in a relationship for 3 years. He broke up with me February of this year, saying that he needed some space for him self to figure things out and that he couldn’t be in a relationship. I understood but it still hurt. We were both each others first long-term relationship.
I wish I would have established the no contact thing right away (after reading some of your pages) but I didn’t. Since it ended we’ve been talking on and off and also seeing each other ( bad I know). He was the one that wanted to hang and talk
I found out that he’d been hanging around with a co worker. While I also saw him too. So I wondered what was going on with that, he said they were just friends. Well at the end of April , they became involved (they’re still together) I was completely heartbroken and confused since he had said he didn’t want to be in a relationship at the moment. I confronted him about it and he admitted that he wanted to basically test the waters elsewhere.
He also added that he still loves me and all these other nice things that I don’t even know if are true. And that he’d want to get back together in the future .what puzzles me the most is what he said about his new found relationship is, “deep down I know this isn’t going to last, it will fizzle it’s self out” . Then why even be in the relationship?? Ha but boys will be boys, right?
So now we have started the no contact thing. My question is if I should do more than 1 month of no contact, since it has been 4 months since it ended? And I’m barely starting it now.
admin
June 16, 2014 at 2:08 pm
Nope, 1 month is enough.
Maddie
June 14, 2014 at 5:07 am
Me and my ex boyfriend broke up a week ago, he went on a church trip.
Now he has a new girlfriend, I have tried everything. We broke up over a stupied reason. What do I do?
Stephanie
June 13, 2014 at 11:25 am
Hey Chris, I was with my ex for 9 months, we went through so much together. We still talked after he broke up with me and we were trying to be friends to see if we could date again. I was trying to change for him and prove myself to him, cause I know I was a B**** to him at times. He started to act strange, and was distant with me. My friends would tell me he was seeing someone and I didnt want to believe it. People told me he was being shady with some girl he knew I didn’t like. Until one day, she posted a message on facebook but cropped his picture, and my friend sent me that picture and I recognized his writing. I asked him if he liked her but he denied her and said I was just assuming. He would even tell me he loved me and that he wanted to try us again later. Again, she’d send him flirty messages and I asked him if she liked him and he said no again. He would deny her to me, blame me for the problems we were having because we argued everyday. So i decided to let him go so he can be happy and he didnt want me to let go, he wanted me to stay in his life. So I did. Days later, he finally told me he liked her I was cool with it at first cause he said he wanted to try something new but also said that he was afraid that I might stop loving him but when we were talking, I remembered that picture and since I knew he wouldn’t admit the truth to me, I asked that girl who was close to him and she told me the truth. So i went off on him. I cussed him out, I hurt him on purpose so that he can feel what I was feeling. I even threaten to break them up and told her off for meddling in, but i didnt mean it, I was just mad. I felt betrayed and backstabbed because I felt like he led me on while he had the other girl hidden. His excuse was that he was protecting her from me. Now he says he stopped loving me cause I hurt him with my words and hurt his girl too. But I was the one who ended up hurt the most. 4 days after that day, he made it official with her and already starting telling her he loved her. Which I think it’s BS because you can’t love someone so easily. I guess what I’m asking is, does he truly want her or is she just a rebound? Or did he just wanted to be happy, and since the other side of the grass was greener, he gave it a shot. They became close within a month. And well, this is the second time he does this to me. The first time, he met someone after the breakup (he dumped me) and 3 weeks later, he was all over that girl and told me he stopped loving me. 3 months later, he came back to me because she played him and he said he never stopped loving, that he lied. Im not going to take him back, I just need a mature man’s point of view.
admin
June 15, 2014 at 4:03 pm
He cheated on you with her?
Stephanie
June 16, 2014 at 10:38 am
No he didnt. We weren’t together at that time, but we still talked like if we were together. He just always denied her whenever I would ask him if he liked her. Now they’re together and already ‘loving’ each other after a month of what he did to me. I feel led on.
tina
June 13, 2014 at 5:10 am
So, it’s been 35 days, what do I do now?
admin
June 15, 2014 at 3:53 pm
Time to contact him.
Marizol
June 12, 2014 at 8:40 pm
Me and my ex were together for almost 3 years on and off . He had this friend he knew for a longtime , something like a childhood crush .. I feel like it was a crush that never went away . Throughout the relationship we fell for each other to the point where we considered engagement . But when we happened to hit the down road in the relationship , I noticed little signs of him contacting her . So I wrote her and asked her to respect the relationship . Sometime later after that , after taking my virginity he admits to be that they had sex , I was so crushed And worst off all he said he had feelings for us both and was confused . We stopped talking for several months after that and now they are together after he told me he wasn’t going to get with her claiming she has too many red flags . So now I’m feeling okay but it crushed me . I don’t know how to go about it . I can’t except the fact this is happening . I haven’t spoken to him at all or given any signs of trying to contact him , I love him and can see myself with him for a longtime , I considered him the love of my life but hope at this point is gone , the love triangle thing is not something that sits right with me , if there’s any getting back I don’t want her around period but I feel is impossible . What do you suggest ?
admin
June 15, 2014 at 3:41 pm
Have you been doing the NC rule?
mary
June 12, 2014 at 6:55 pm
How do you implement the no contact rule if you have a child together.
admin
June 15, 2014 at 3:05 pm
Probably going to have to do limited contact.
mary
June 12, 2014 at 8:16 am
My ex and I have a newborn son together. How do I implement the no contact rule but allow him to see his son.
admin
June 15, 2014 at 3:33 pm
Ya… do limited contact…
Andrea Parker
June 11, 2014 at 11:15 pm
My bf and I dated for 4 years, we recently broke up in march. only after a coupld of days after we broke up I found out he was already talking to someone else (which i was just upset about). He kept telling me he was sorry that he hurt me. I played it cool and just let it go after a while. Finally things started to be okay between us, but she was still in the picture (not as a girlfriend, they were still just talking). She would always tell him to stop talking to me and he would tell her no he’s not going to stop talking to me. About a couple of week ago he told me she asked him out and he said no to her. She also asked him to move in and said no again. I told him to just give her a chance cause he was going back and forth with her and I. And he said he is not ready to let go of me, and that I still have his heart. A couple of days ago I sent him a text and she replied back to me as him and i Know it wasn’t him due to the fact that i know how he texts,this isnt the first time she did this though) She finally told me it was her. She kept texting me saying that she wants something serious with him and that they love eachother, and for me to step down and respect the fact that she cares for him. As aggravated as i was i didn’t reply with a negative text I just simply said I will talk to him and to not text me from his phone anymore and she did’nt reply back. the next day I had talked to him and asked him what happend and he said that she got mad about us texting each other and seeign eachother still. (Note: they still are not together) And that she didnt talk to him the whole day. The next day he called me and said she texted him saying she wasnt mad or sad and that she was in between and that he was going to her house to see what’s going on. I kind of got upset and told him just not to text me for a while or anything and that i needed i break from him. and all he said was that he was sorry. So please help IDK what to do or think! He supposely loves her already, can she be just rebound?? Help!
admin
June 15, 2014 at 3:15 pm
Ya she can be a rebound. Its very possible but how long have they been dating?
Nikki
June 10, 2014 at 6:55 am
Chris, Just need some insight please, My boyfriend of a year n a half separated May 13 this year broke it off completely May 26 of this year, we were going to try in work on our relationship. Till I found him hanging with a new girl he dubbed friend. Till she took the initiative and posted publicly how amazing her best friend and boy friend is. Because I made a vow not to stalk facebook. He texted me a message and stated sorry I didn’t get the chance to talk to you first like we agreed, but it all happened so fast. Now I know I don’t think I would have found out so fast that they were dating but she let the cat out of the bag. Now I am smart enough to realize what she is doing, 1 trying to get a rise out of me, which all I stated to him was hey it does happen all I care about is if you are happy. Now he went from me 1 1/2 relationship to a gf 2 days after we breakup legitimately because when we first split we were going to work on it. now he is all happy and blah blah blah. I have come to know that this is a rebound, because my ex cant be without someone but during this whole got the new girlfriend, he called himself a piece of sh%t and how sorry he was for hurting me all to which was hey it happens what else you going to do, to I miss you wish I can spend one day with you blah blah to being ice cold and how happy with the new girl he is. Can you please someone explain the male mind, he is a good man but thoroughly confused and our breakup was because of outside influences and bad timing, but decided to be decent with other because he bonded with my son and told my son he would never forget to spend time with him or be his friend, so I play it decent and try not to get upset. I just don’t know what the game is here and would like some feedback on what to expect like I said, it almost seems like if he doesn’t get the response from me he was hoping for which I still don’t know what that is he changes his moods please help. I am firm believer that we were good together and that this is a learning lesson either to help me move on and get stronger, or whether or not it is worth looking into and trying to reconcile. And if I am right about rebound, remember she is doing all the public posting not him, he just likes it once and awhile whatever she posts, do you think he is only using her, good example one night he called to ask about something like I said just staying decent, and he said yeah tiff had me run up with her to pick out hair color, it was like watching paint dry. Ok…… right so I just don’t know please help someone what do you think I should do or continue to do and do you think this will run its course or what
admin
June 10, 2014 at 4:09 pm
Well, the no contact rule is a good idea for you at this point.
Nikki
June 11, 2014 at 3:25 am
I did and several weeks went by I told you the only reason we did contact was to talk about my son. however and kept it brief and friendly. but after those several weeks, he flipped that I wasn’t contacted him, I broke the nc 1 week before the 30 days cause it just felt right to do so, and he claimed to me that he still has feelings and tells me at the end of the conversation he still loves me. and little by little the couple of texts and conversations relate to how much he misses me knowing him the way I believe I do going into no contact again may ultimately undue what I am trying to do is reconcile on a whole new level as starting out in a new relationship because the old one is gone. he at this point said he is so overwhelmed with outside issues such as job financials etc he headed for a breakdown. now he said the split was so that he didn’t end hating me which I believe knowing him the way that I do. I believe this relationship is just he way of dealing, I know sounds weird but you did say that is how some guys deal with the pain, however this girl was a friend from back in the day nothing more was ever between them so I know for a fact the way he talks she is just there to fill that need. he claims he misses me terribly and focuses on the positives of our old relation ship and what he misses the most. my thought in this and where I am turning to you, is in this case, I cease no contact or not even get back to him, he is the type that will say screw it I am not dealing with this drama anymore cause that is how he is. so if contact is implanted in this special case, do I just continue with positive texts keeping his mind focused on what he loved about me, possibly getting him to think about why he did what he did and keeping me on his mind always as it is positive and negative removing those emotions that caused him to leave, what he thought was right to make our situation grow by being apart which he thought would fix things
micha
June 6, 2014 at 2:13 am
I kind of have an interesting situation, i broke up with my bf during a time of stress and anxiety, there was a lot of fighting and he agreed to the breakup. When the emotions settle down, i realized that was a mistake and we were talking about getting back together ( he was hesitant). After only four days i get the news that he has slept with someone else and this devastated me. The girl met him at a friendly dinner with his other friends and ended up at his home. She contacted me through social media and pushed my buttons which made things worse and ended up sabotaging my contact with him (she even tells him that she loves him in 48 hrs!). my bf has never rebounded on a girl and he thinks this is fate and now he is dating her and even told me they are planning to move in together only after 3 weeks of knowing each other (we wanted to move in during our relationship and he told me he wanted to plan it out and not be impulsive). He wanted me to stop communication and i did. we haven’t spoken in weeks. I really love him and i want him back, and i don’t trust this woman and her intentions. He told me that he didn’t love me and doesn’t wanna be with me and warned me to stay away from him but he would not broken up with me during even when we had problems. I guess im trying to make sense of it all and honestly im confused. Is he really hurt and doing all this to move on? should i break no contact and talk to him? i did cross the line with this new girl ( i was nasty to her and called her a whore lol), if so what can i do to get him back? I felt loved and cared in our relationship and so its hard for me to believe that he didn’t love me.
admin
June 6, 2014 at 5:40 pm
What caused the stress and anxiety…
How long has he been dating the new girl?
micha
June 14, 2014 at 1:36 am
the stress and anxiety was caused by school and work also, i felt like he pulled away in the end of it. He has been seeing her for about a month now and he is convinced that they are in “love”.
Its so amazing how quick he has changed, he had a 6 yr relationship in the past and he never seemed to show much of PDA on social media during that (thats the way he kept things in the past, affectionate but subtle). But he is very public about this new girl, kissing pictures, romantic poems and quotes. its almost like i never knew him at all. Maybe he is in love and it sucks that i had to watch him fall for another woman.
wia
June 5, 2014 at 6:08 pm
,,, my ex boyfriend is a seafarer and we are already broke up 7months but in that 7months 0f break up we still have communication,,but after he got home after 8 month ..(because hes in the shore back then of 7 months ) but when he get home after 2weeks he already have a new girlfriend that he just met for the first time , and all of hes promises to me before he get back he continued it to the new girlfriend .. i dont know if he already moved on or hes just forecing himself to get back up and start a new relationship, and i dnt know if he still wants me back but me i want him back cause i dont know if i already moved on cause i still thinks about him and i feel so incomplete without him even if i date a hundred types of guys i still want him 🙁 cant help but cry before i sleep wishing him to be with me again..what will i do now ? Cause it feels like he dont care about me anymore 🙁 and it looks like hes happy with another girl ..
admin
June 6, 2014 at 5:15 pm
How long has he been dating the new girl?
ash
June 3, 2014 at 10:06 am
hi
admin
June 5, 2014 at 4:50 pm
Hi Ash!
ash
June 3, 2014 at 10:11 am
My long (3 year) story short..
My boyfriend and I were together for a year, we fell in love quickly, I was from a different country so he asked me to move in with him so I didnt have to go home. A month or so after it began to fall apart, he needed space and so after trying some more I went back to my country. We continued long distance for 5 months before he said he needed to end the relationship due to lack of ‘feeling it’ but still wanted to stay in touch. So we did for 6 months before I went over again. This time we lived seperate, and enjoyed getting to know and appreciate each other on a much deeper and more real way. He was still uncertain about officially making it a relationship, so we didnt sleep together this time. But we did have an amazing, connected time together. My visa was up so I left the country, still in regular affectionate contact, deep conversations etc. It seemed that he was becoming more and more keen on me, sending me affectionate texts etc. So I thought I had been really getting somehwhre after that intitial break up. So its been 5 months apart now and he just let me know 2 weeks ago that he actually fell in love with someone else just after I left, but it quickly turned to crap, they just argue, she dumped him and it hurt him alot. I was shocked by the news and after a brief radical outburst, we had a really intimate and understanding conversation after. He said that he was glad to know me, someone who truly understands him, and that he was really glad that I came back to see him and how much he appreciated our time together. He did not say that he wants me back however. He said he was still hurt over this other woman and that he still sees her sometimes and its still going on in a way. So we ended the conversation kindly, and I did not contact him for 2 weeks. I sent him a friendly text asking how he was and saying that I just found something that he gave me. But no reply. 3 days later sent a text, he replied straight away even though he was working, said he hasnt been good, was friendly and said we’ll talk soon. So what should my plan be now? Was it wrong to go quiet for 2 weeks after a nice honest conversation? Its just, I never knew when was the right time to apply NC with him. He responds best with genuine connection. Yet all of my patience and understanding has not been enough to get back together.
aishwarya
May 24, 2014 at 1:36 pm
Me n my ex bf met 7 months back..DAT tym he had been trying to win me did everything to get me….n after two months were were in a relationship n everything WS going on smooth
.until I met a guy who became a very good Frn n deer were rumours which people n he thought negative n he always had a problem with DAT.many small small issues started arising n I used to breakup all d tym BT he was…all d time in favour of patchup.n with time he started making frndz n I was totally into him…. I used to call him madly text him…. BT WS like very casual dz continued fr almost 15-20 days n started lieing me….he used to put statuses for other gal… kept me waiting over d call ..meeting was less too…. I started getting mad cz…I had never seen him dat way…. den one morning he asked Me to meet him n I WS like OK…. den I met him…. he WS nice talked good…n wanted to get intimate BT I refused saying no relationship no intimacy…. den he promised me DAT he will make things OK BT he need time… n v were intimate … later in d evening he started again behaving weird… he again said he wanted time…he z confused. .n he was going mad… after DAT ..DAT evening only he finally broke up n blocked me evryehrre I called him desperately n den msged him too BT deer WS no response…. den I WS out of town fr a week n wen I got back I got to know he. Z been hanging out with a 7-8 years elder hawt chick who z a divorcee n z also having a bf… n I tried to contact again BT he was having d same attitude n dint show any response n now I see him everyday with DAT chick. . So I ws frustrated n I went near his house so DAT I can figure out things …. he WS totally mad on me… n told me again… to stop all d drama of loving him n to move on n den i saw d love bytes of dat gal so i asked him abt it den he replied its his life…n i m getting wat i did..(me)d final conversation WS v wud talk n slowing c how things going on… BT again afternoon called me n asked me not to bother him n to stop irritating him…. n asked me to.move on …. whatever m trying z not possible … need help cz its been a month of break up n I feel pathetic everyday I c him with DAT chick… m 21 years old so z he… is deer any chance of getting him back? I m really in love with him n want him…all my attempts have failed … he just don’t wanna talk or c me… he z so involved with DAT chick…what should I do???
tina
May 27, 2014 at 9:32 am
I’m sorry you’re going through this. If it probably will it probably won’t make you feel better, but my ex boyfriend of 7 years that I love so dearly, has betrayed me and caused others that I love to betray me and not to mention has neglected to care for my health or my love for our child (a doggy) and is heavily involved with someone that is am extreme downgrade and they both have put me through hell in the past 6 months and I still forgive. All I can do, all you can do, is leave this in the hands of God. He has a plan bigger than we think we just have to trust and have faith in that. I’m always here for I am a child of God.
Loyola
May 24, 2014 at 2:42 am
Hi Chris
I usually post on another page and I never thought I’d be in this page but after my ex telling me that he had been on dates with a girl who lived further across the world than I did, he told me he wouldn’t do long distance with her because if he was Gona do long distance with anyone it would be me. Basically I downloaded this new chat app on my phone only to find he’s uploaded a picture with her holding hands and they seem to be on a train travelling somewhere together. He had told me they went on 7 dates together and then she lost her job and left to go back to her country. We were together for 2.5 yrs and he started dating her within a couple of months. I’m in so much pain I can’t bare it I have done no contact and I followed your system and he did come back but he made me believe we were going to get back together then he changed his mind over night.
1.Is this a rebound?
2. Can I get him back?
3. How can I get him to come back and commit?
Please Chris he’s the love of my life, he seems like a completely different person right now
admin
May 25, 2014 at 2:23 pm
He obviously lied about the long distance didn’the?
Loyola
May 27, 2014 at 9:58 pm
Yes clearly, but he seems to be ashamed of her cause he’s hiding her from me and also he told his friends where he lives that he is just having fun and it’s not serious.
Do you think it’s just a rebound?
Why have I suddenly become a game after 2.5 years? How do I get my relationship back? I’ve worked too hard to lose him to someone that he’s just having fun with!
Ellen
May 21, 2014 at 10:31 pm
I was with my ex for about 7.5 years. We were each other’s first in almost everything. We were best friends. I broke up with him because we had been together for most of our youths and beginning our lives as young adults. I felt that we both needed to see other people. I especially wanted him to get whatever he needed to out of system. If we were to ever get married, I figured if we didn’t see other people one of us might end up having a mid-life crisis and cheat on the other. Secondly, I had finished college and had applied to a really good program for continuing education as well as to pursue my career in another state. He was still in school. We broke up when I moved in Sept. 2011 with the intention of maybe one day getting back together. We stayed in contact. He even came to visit me once. Last year, I met someone and started dating him. Because rent is so high in my area, we decided to move in to cut costs- not really out of wanting to be with other more closely. My ex began dating someone about 7 months ago. Says he’s happy with her, they plan on moving in together 6 months from now when he graduates. I still love him and was still holding on to the idea that we’d try to get back together when he finished school. He thought I was over him so he decided to move on. He says he worked really hard to get over me and wants to give his new relationship a shot. He sees “wife potential” in this new girl. I know a love of almost 8 years doesn’t just disappear. Can it be that the distance between us has made it easier for him? It’s also been almost 3 years since I moved. I’m going back home to visit my family in a week; Is there a chance of me saving this? (There is no correlation, but I’m breaking up with my current boyfriend and I always knew there’d be no future with him.)
Andi
June 23, 2014 at 7:07 pm
I am in almost an exact same situation except my ex and I are in the same city. I’ve kept physical contact to a minimum because I was dating someone else and would feel extremely guilty if I did anything that went against that persons wishes even though I knew he wasn’t someone I would end up with. My ex also knew I was not actually wanting to be this person forever. My ex was dating other people, though. It was difficult for me, but he always told me he loved and missed me. He was sleeping around a lot, though, so I wasn’t comfortable going back to him. He broke up with me wanting to date other people, so I felt until he had it out of his system if would be painful for me. I knew he would get it out of his system and that’s when things would fall into place. And they had started falling into place. It had been 2 years and we both agreed we had learned a lot. He made it clear he wanted me back and I told him I wanted him back. I told him I would end my other relationship, but due to big event in that guys life, I would have to wait for less of an ass hole time so it wouldn’t be as painful to him. He also had to end things with someone he was dating. Only a few weeks later and before he had completely ended things with that girl, I find out he has started a relationship with someone else. An actual relationship – not just dating. This as I was becoming so happy to be back with him and back with his family and all the things I had kept close during this time and all these things I loved He said it was a difficult decision, but he couldn’t wait and went with his heart. I’m afraid it is the end. She is a great girl from what I can tell, but the pain I feel is debilitating. We were on the cusp of being together again and he chose someone else. He didn’t even tell me – I picked up on something he said. Just like that everything I had had faith in for the last two years and what looked like the final payoff got ripped from me. I don’t know what to do. I wish she would disappear. I with I could go back in time and end things with the other guy sooner. I wish I had doe so much differently. It seems like it would have actually made a difference. But my ex and I talked about our relationship details openly and I really felt he knew he was still my love, so I am just completely lost and hurt. I would rather he not have kept me around the last two years for this. I feel so incredibly cheated.
Sorry this was so long. It was nice to get off of my chest and I see that someone else has something similar. I’ve scoured for advice, but none really fits this kind of situation.
tina
May 27, 2014 at 9:42 am
You’re so mature about it. I commend you. I did the same thing, I just got out of a 7 year relationship, and I can’t take him being with this new chick he met almost immediately. It’s killing me. He claims he still loves me but has moved on and is happy. I just don’t feel it in my heart, and he’s all I see for my future so this whole thing is just taking a complete toll on me and I feel like I’m dying. I don’t know the future or what’s really going on but any tips for how to remain sane and optimistic?
Andi
June 23, 2014 at 7:12 pm
I’m so sorry. I know exactly how you feel. It hurts so badly. I also feel lost. And confused. You’re not alone. I don’t even know what to do with myself.
admin
May 22, 2014 at 4:03 pm
How old is he and the new girl?