By Chris Seiter

Updated on March 8th, 2021

There’s this guy I dated last year. He was different from any man I’ve ever dated. I didn’t like him when I first met him. His voice was annoying and he clearly had reasons for asking me out in the first place that weren’t exactly kosher. You see, before me, he had run through.

I realized this later when I got to know his friends. One of them told me about his past girlfriends, so I knew going forward the kind of person I was seeing. So I wasn’t surprised when he turned out to be just as awful as his friend warned me he would be.

After we had been together for six months and I had kind of started to believe that thing that every single girl believes in that situation.

Maybe he is just are different with me. He decided to break things off the only way he knew how. He gave me the same excuses he had given what I can only guess were many women before me.

Lucky for me, I was expecting it to happen eventually, even if I had momentarily hoped that things would work out. But the thing is, he had started laying the groundwork for a new relationship long before he broke things off with me with the girl he’s still with today.

Needless to say, I feel a little bit like “Good Luck Chuck” sometimes when I think about it. But the thing is, when he told me every line in the book to break things off, he never once said anything close to the truth, the fact that there was someone else he was interested in.

I had EVERY right to be angry when I realized, “I need space”, “I just don’t want a serious relationship right now”, and “I really need to focus on x,y, and z right now” were all just him trying to push me away to make room for this new girl. ( I’ve met her. She’s actually really great.)

Out of the whole relationship, though, I had made some incredible friends. So, we were stuck in the same friend-group. I know that he was expecting me to just sever the friendships and walk away, but my friends weren’t about to let that happen.

So, I opted to keep the friendships no matter how awkward it made things. I wasn’t mad at him even though I probably should have been, but I wasn’t.

When he realized I wasn’t just going to roll over and be destroyed by the fact that he dumped me for someone else, He made every effort to ruin my life and to make me feel as if he hated me. I actually felt sorry for the new girl for a bit because he was expending so much energy on hating me that I’m sure she felt it on her end.

He even banned me from friend gatherings. Now, that, well, that kind of sucked.

The crazy part is, I haven’t really spoken to him in a year and he is still trying to keep up with what is going on in my life. I start doing something new, and there he is trolling my Snapchats and LinkedIn, since he doesn’t have access anywhere else. If I wanted him back, I’d post a lot more online, I think.

But that breakup turned out to be a good thing for me. Seeing him be a jerk made me realize that he was not who I thought he was.

Now, I’m not telling you this because I want you to make the same decisions I did. Odds are, your ex didn’t go into your relationship planning to treat you poorly like mine did.

I tell you this because I have never truly been hated by anyone. Having someone that acted like he cared for close to half of a year treat me as if I had somehow wronged him simply because I refused to let him steamroll over me would have been heartbreaking if I had ever let myself fall for him.

Heck, I’m not saying it didn’t hurt. It was like having your best friend gut punch you on the playground after they told you they had another best friend. It’s not easy, even when you know it’s coming.

So, I can imagine, being blindsided by it at all isn’t fun either.

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From Love to Hate

So what changed? How did he go from caring to hating you?

I mean, clearly he cared about you at some point, but now you are dealing with him saying hateful things:

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“I hate you.”

 

“I never really loved you.”

 

“I don’t love you anymore.”

 

“You’re worthless.”

 

“You mean nothing to me.”

 

“Don’t ever talk to me again.”

The list goes on I’m sure. We have women come to the Recovery Pro Facebook Page and tell us every day the horrible things their exes have said to them before, during, and after a breakup. Most of them are downright vicious.

A lot of them ask us what that means. Why would someone who cared for 6 months, a year, 3 years, or even longer say such hateful things?

Well, today is your lucky day, because we’re going to dig into why this happens to so many women, and I’m sure men too on some level. But today we are talking about you and why your ex boyfriend suddenly felt the urge to lash out at you.

The good news is, it most likely has absolutely nothing to do with anything you have done. So… YAY!

 

The bad news is he’s pushing you away for some reason and you are probably dying to figure out why.

There is only one way you will ever find out the answer… patience. It’ll be difficult, but it’ll definitely be worth it.

 

 

What’s a Girl to Do?

Well, right now I’m sure your brain is jumping to all sorts of conclusions and it’s coming up with all sorts of over-the-top solutions. That’s completely normal. But I’m going to tell you something that sounds a little odd.

Your brain can be your worst enemy right now, not just because you are probably overthinking everything. It will tell you to do some pretty outrageous stuff to get him back and most of them will just hurt your case.

 

 

Have you ever set an alarm in the morning for something really important, only to have your mind work the noise into your dream giving you a few extra hours that it thinks you need?

What I’m saying is that your brain isn’t’ always right. In this case, you’re probably asking yourself What do you do now that your ex who supposedly cared for you is putting all of his energy into hating you?

Right now your ex might hate you simply because you aren’t making walking away easy. Maybe you were surprised by his need to pull away. In my experience and from what I know of other people, the worst thing you can do when someone wants to leave is to try to force them to stay.Just like magnets, if you change one’s direction and try to push them together, the other will be repelled.

Now, I’m guessing you don’t want to repel your ex. In fact, since you found yourself here at this site I’m going to assume you want him back.

First thing’s first. you have to fight every single natural urge that you think will get him back.You know you’ve had those thoughts.

You know you’ve had those thoughts. You’ll be getting coffee and you’ll think, “I could get him one and drop it off at his work. It’ll be a reason to see him and he’ll be grateful.”

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Wrong!

 

From where he’s sitting, it’ll make you seem desperate, and slightly stalkery.

Love is funny. We tend to try to love the people in our lives the way we like to be loved. If we desire compliments, then we tend to dole them out easier, If we desire texts, then we tend to text more. So when we want someone to come back and be close to us, we tend to smother them a bit. We try to get them to come back the way we would want someone to try to win us back.  But, the only way to get him back is to make him think it was his idea. And the only way to do that is to get through No Contact.

A lot of times after a break-up, the women that come to us have already given in to the urges they’ve had to try to get him back. They end up chasing their ex and driving them away. That need to know thing your feeling right now will drive you to want to understand why he’s angry. I get it. You want to feel like you are doing something productive to make that happen.

Do you want to know a secret?

It doesn’t matter why he’s angry.

 

You can get him back without knowing why he’s acting this way at all.

In fact, in most cases, anger is just a tool he’s using to push you away.

This is where that patience comes in. Once you get him back and he is hopelessly in love with you again… then you can bring it up casually in a normal conversation after you’ve been back together for a while. But for now, let’s just focus on getting him back.

Have you ever tried to get a child to do something he didn’t want to do? If you have, then you know that you can’t be direct about it. You have to peak his interest. In the same way, No Contact creates an air of mystery. In this case, I would suggest a 30-45 day No Contact Period, just to give him time to cool down.

During that time you are going to become your best self. You are going to enjoy life, go out with friends, and post pictures to your social media.All the while, you will not respond to any attacks from him at all.

No Contact means no contact at all. No texts. No phone calls. No long heartfelt letters. This is the time to fight those instincts and stick to what we’ve laid out for you with the ExBoyfriend Recovery Program. Read more about No Contact here.

It can be the most difficult part of getting your ex back, but it is also the most effective.. If you can get through that part, then the rest of the program is fairly simple.

Just look at Sarah Michelle’s story. Her ex told her they were never getting back together. Boy, was he wrong!

Even she had some trouble getting through No Contact and it took her a few tries to get it right, she had such great success that Chris invited her to share her story with us. You see, sticking to No Contact didn’t just get her boyfriend back, it did so much more than that.

Doing No Contact properly will have him wondering what you’re doing without him.

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In Sarah Michelle’s case, he was begging her to come back before she could even get all the way through No Contact.

I will give you a little advice to make No Contact a little easier, though, especially if your ex is lashing out at you.

Did you ever watch “Lost”?

In what I think was the very first episode, Jack tells Kate a story about his past to calm her down so she can handle suturing up a wound he got when their plane crashed.You see, he was a surgeon and he messed up a surgery on a girl’s spine that could have been catastrophic. It had been a long procedure and he had accidentally shredded the base of her spine. As you can imagine he was terrified.

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Now, I know it’s fiction, but the way he said he dealt with the fear was by getting through 5 seconds at a time. Now, 5 seconds is a bit small for me, so I’m going to suggest 30 minute or an hour. If you can make if through the next hour not responding to him, then you can get through any hour without giving in to the urge to respond.

If you need something more tangible, you can always do what I’d do. I would set a countdown on my phone for the day that No Contact is done. There is one called “Countdown” in Itunes that is free. I use it regularly. Anytime you feel like giving into the ideas your brain has, all you have to do is look at the countdown and remind yourself, “I’ve made it this far, can make it a day longer.

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So, what am I trying to say?

The sooner you start, the sooner you’ll be through No Contact. You just have to ignore the fact that he’s angry, even if you think you did something to deserve it. You won’t get the chance to fix it if you don’t get him to be a part of your life again. You won’t achieve that by driving him away. So take the tips I’ve laid out and apply them to your situation.

  1. Don’t give into overthinking. It’ll just have you doing things that will work against you.
  2. No Contact. No Contact. No Contact.
  3. Just get through the next 30 minutes without reaching out to him, then start the next 30 minutes.
  4. Set yourself a countdown on your phone. It makes the time feel less like forever.
  5. Keep living your life and make it better. This creates a sense of intrigue on his end and ensures that things won’t just go back to the way they were. I mean, clearly he wasn’t happy with the way things were going.

Feel free to let us know how your No Contact is going in the comments below. We’d also be happy to answer any questions you might have and give you guidance along the way. If you’ve bought the book, be sure to oin us on our Private Facebook Page. We have quite a community over there that doubles not only as a way for us to connect with you, but as a way for you to get the support you need quickly.

You’ve got this.

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55 thoughts on “My Ex Boyfriend Hates Me And I Love Him….”

  1. lana

    September 8, 2022 at 3:06 pm

    my ex broke up with me 4 months ago ,we have been together for 3 years so far , i tried the no contact rule and he kept texting me everyday for 4 days and then i replied , he asked me to stay in his life as friends until we figure things out but mentioned that he doesn’t want to date me right now , i agreed , he didn’t show any interest like before , i kept texting and starting conversations but he didn’t put any effort to text or ask about me , every now and then i kept mentioning our relationship and was trying with him to get back which was obviously wrong , the last time i was upset i told him i don’t trust him and that my life is hard with him and that he’s my biggest disappointment in my life , he didn’t say anything and only said that from now on everyone should move on and see their own lives , i was mad , i didn’t reply and just blocked him for 2 days everywhere , after that i removed the block , and texted him , he told me not to text him back ever again and said that i was the worst thing that happened to him ever and was so mean to me and said that he doesn’t have any feeling for me anymore and threatened to block me if i texted again , since then it’s been two weeks and i didn’t text him after , what should i do now ? he’s not a friend on social media so he can’t see anything or know anything about me ..

    1. Coach Shaunna Nicol

      September 8, 2022 at 8:26 pm

      Hey Iana, so now you need to follow a 45 day no contact minimum where you work on yourself, your ex started to get scared when you didnt reach out to him in the first four days, his guilt for ending the relationship was making him want to be “friends” I would say that you need to just spend some time away from him completely cut off any sort of contact and focus on showing that you are moving on with your life. Even when you miss him or get curious stick with the NC this includes snooping on his socials.

  2. Shree

    April 25, 2021 at 2:10 am

    Hi,
    I have been in a relationship for 4years. My ex is very possessive and he broke up with me because I have allowed one of my male friend for whom I had feelings years ago to come to myy room. I thinks I cheated. I apologized a thousand times and tried to make him understand but he is so arrogant. He brought the past topics of our fights years back when I had a few words with my previous ex because he had reached out but it meant nothing to me and when I had chat with one of his friends.
    He is accusing me of all wrong doings and now I dont know what to do.

  3. Zania

    July 1, 2020 at 2:21 am

    my ex came back after 2 months of no contact but he left again after 1 month I dont know what to do? Do you think no contact will work now? or is just gone forever. I messed up he was upset and I think he’s not going to come back ever again.

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      July 4, 2020 at 12:33 am

      Hey Zania, yes it can work again but this time you work the Ungettable information and then if your ex is going to be working on himself hopefully during this time to make the relationship work

  4. erica

    January 29, 2020 at 7:56 pm

    i just got out of a bad relationship and my ex is so contradicting he says he loves me when we are alone and i’m emotional and when he doesn’t get me back he says he hates me

    1. EBR Team Member: Shaunna

      January 30, 2020 at 10:34 pm

      Erica if he is acting this way then go into a No Contact for 45 days and allow yourself time from him, and allow him to calm his emotions. If the relationship was toxic of course I am going to recommend you focus getting over him

  5. Amanda

    July 26, 2019 at 3:26 pm

    I did the no contact for 6 weeks and it made no difference he’s been actively seeking out other women on dating sites and when I said how much it hurt me that he’ll literally go with anyone as long as it’s not me he’s told me I’m a b****** rat and to hurry up and die. It’s really destroyed me, I feel unable to ever get over it. I don’t know how he doesn’t ever have a conscience about how he’s treated me. I’m in turmoil and it’s taking a toll on my health.

  6. Taylor

    July 9, 2019 at 5:02 pm

    Hi there. I’m reaching out because I’m incredibly lost. I love this boy so much. We dated on and off for about a year, and have been broken up for 11 months now. I’ve tried NC a few different times but it always finds a way to be interrupted, either because i end up reaching out, or he does. I’d say me more often then him. He does not have a new girlfriend, but he has friends that influence him drastically, to the point that he now sleeps around with other girls, something he didn’t do before. He told my best friend he’s missing me and super confused. That was last week, but then four days later he said he never wants to speak again. I’m incredibly troubled by all of this. If he was capable of emotionally moving on wouldn’t he have by now? Is he just caught up in the physical part with other girls? Is it just a phase he needs to go through? He’s only 20. We see each other here and there, fairly often as we go to college at the same place. I love him with everything in me. Did I loose him forever this time? Does he mean it when he says he never wants to speak again, even if he has said it before and literally broke it on my birthday? What can I do? He claims he doesn’t want a girlfriend. Why would he say he misses me, apparently only as a friend but then sleep with me? I am so nervous I am going to truly loose him this time for good. I don’t want him with anyone else. It hurts me so much knowing he is sleeping around. I hate him for it, but I can’t help but still love him. Please help. He even has gotten angry about the idea of me being and talking to a different guy. He claims he doesn’t care yet he will say mean things about the guy- that he doesn’t even know! So clearly he cares right?

  7. Katt

    November 20, 2018 at 11:07 pm

    I was with my boyfriend for 9 years we had a son together he moved to florida I’m still in our home state we’ve been apart for 8 months I really want to fix things and get back together he’s told my mom he doesn’t think I’m the person for him he has hot and cold days some days I think he hate me and others he will talk to me we never talk about our relationship we are currently not coparenting well he wants our 2 year old son to come to Florida and and I’m not comfortable with our son going out there by himself right now and so I believe he hates me even more since I won’t allow our son to come out there I do take our son whenever I can to visit him but that’s not good enough for him I just want us to be a family again but the way things are looking I’m not sure if it will happen

  8. JoAnn Moreno

    May 9, 2018 at 7:12 am

    I really need help please. I’m so heartbroken and there’s absolutely nothing I can do.
    My bf and I we’re on a break, he said he needed space… Fine I left him alone and was doing the no contact…3 weeks in, yesterday morning, my ex’s best friend hit me up and said he heard that I slept with one of my ex’s friends (mind you I had only met said friend once!). He said he just wanted to know the truth, I told him the truth, NO! HELL NO! He said he didn’t think so and now he can defend me and talk to my ex for me and straighten it out. He said my ex was upset and sad all day and was drunk all day. He told me I shouldn’t reach out to my ex because he was upset and really drunk but I couldn’t help it so I messaged my ex on fb (broke no contact, I know) and I told him that I know what he heard and it’s not true and I will do whatever to prove it. Long story short he believes the rumor and said he never wants to talk to me or have anything to do with me ever again and other things. He doesn’t believe that I ever really loved him or cared about him and everything I did was fake. I am soooo broken hearted! I could see if I did it but on everything I love I didn’t! What do I do now?

    1. Chris Seiter

      May 10, 2018 at 2:04 am

      HI JoAnn…I am sorry you are in so much pain, but know that rumors are not truth and in time he will see this. Right now, emotions are flying high, so just pull back and you should take a look at utilizing NC to focus on your own self recovery and give him more space. I sense that at this stage, it is better not to push things. But I have two ideas. The first one is to write a personal letter, informing him that you are going to take “a good bit of time” time and space for yourself to heal. That you are very hurt by this whole ordeal Tell him that you will no longer even respond to such a vicious rumor. Just leave at that. My second suggestion is go get my ebook, “The No Contact Rule Book”. It is epic in length and will help you throughout the whole process along with your self recovery activities. Let me know how things go for you JoAnne!

    2. JoAnn Moreno

      May 10, 2018 at 9:28 am

      Thanks Chris.
      So write him a letter? How do I give it to him if he doesn’t want anything to do with me?
      How will the No Contact rule work in this situation? I’m confused. I just want to clear my name. At this point I don’t even care to get him back, just want him to see that it was a lie because he owes me an apology!

    3. Chris Seiter

      May 10, 2018 at 4:17 pm

      Hi again JoAnn….I think it is a classy, non confrontational move to mail him a letter. The attention and effort you put on trying to clear your name will likely just be met with resistance and in my view, its just not worth the hassle. Eventually, an apology would be nice. But he has already proven himself to be unfairly judgmental…so don’t hold your breath. You may want to ask yourself, is this absurdity worth any more of your time and efforts. The future is with the things that bring your fulfillment. Chase after those activities. Just my opinion. But i really did like your question, “So write him a letter?” It made me laugh because I could almost see the incredulity in your online expression as you were probably wondering…”what in the world is he talking about!”

  9. Amy

    May 7, 2018 at 11:14 am

    Hello so when my boyfriend broke up with me we agreed that he would wait to change his Facebook profile picture till after his birthday so that we wouldn’t have to deal with everyone seeing it right away. He knew I was home this weekend and when he broke up with me I told him that if he wanted to meet up he could let me know. Suddenly late Sunday he changed all his pictures out of nowhere. Is he doing this to get a reaction from me or is he doing it because he is mad I never reached out to him when I was home. We were together for 3 years and when he broke up with me I was very nice about it. All I have been doing is posting social media that I’m doing good.

    1. Chris Seiter

      May 7, 2018 at 3:39 pm

      Hi Amy…3 years in a relationships gives the two of you some traction….some roots. Those don’t come up easily. So I suspect you have not heard the last from him. As to why he changed the pics…it could have been a somewhat impulsive thing. Maybe its been nagging on him and he is still internalizing the breakup. Its not possible for someone to just get over such a thing and move on. You have picked up my ebook, Ex Boyfriend Recover Pro, right? If not, you should check it out as it is a comprehensive blueprint on the entire strategy you might want to employ to get him back, if that is what you ultimately like to do. Just go to my website Menu/Products link to learn more. What you are doing with posting on social media is the right thing to do, but there are many other things you can do, including developing a plan for your own self recovery. Also, understanding how No Contact works and how to implement will be helpful. So go look into some of the comprehensive resources available to you Amy and let me know how things progress!

    2. Amy

      May 7, 2018 at 8:20 pm

      So do you think the fact that I didn’t reach out to him when I was home made him mad or do you think he is trying to get a reaction out of me? I feel like he was doing it to hurt me. Also husband birthday lands on day 20 of nc so is it then okay to wish him a happy birthday to still show him that I care.

    3. Chris Seiter

      May 7, 2018 at 10:03 pm

      I think Birthday wishes would be fine as day 20 if pretty far along.

    4. Amy

      May 7, 2018 at 4:54 pm

      So do you think he’s mad that I appear to be doing so well and that is why he decided not to wait to change them like we originally planned? Also since he knew that I was home do you think that he was expecting me to text him and then when I didn’t he got mad? His birthday is next Sunday and that will be about 20 days of no contact . To show him that I somewhat care should I send him a simple happy birthday? Also thank you so much for the help.

    5. Chris Seiter

      May 7, 2018 at 10:34 pm

      Well, neither of us can be certain what he is thinking. But breakups often bring out the worst in us…..the anger, resentment, the petty words and actions. All of the past can get wrapped in the present. So whatever it is, don’t dwell on it. It may never be known. But over time, these emotions subside. And yes, sending him a birthday wish would be classy and it might lead to some thawing. Catch ya later Amy!

    6. Chris Seiter

      May 7, 2018 at 10:34 pm

      Well, neither of us can be certain what he is thinking. But breakups often bring out the worst in us…..the anger, resentment, the petty words and actions. All of the past can get wrapped in the present. So whatever it is, don’t dwell on it. It may never be known. But over time, these emotions subside. And yes, sending him a birthday wish would be classy and it might lead to some thawing. Catch ya later Amy!

  10. Megan

    March 19, 2018 at 2:11 pm

    Any advice will be appreciated.
    I messed up. I was with my bf for over 18 months. We were on and off for the last 8/9. I doubted his feelings for me, I had insecurities from past relationships.
    He didn’t really do much to reassure me, it was only when we would fight that I could see he cared.
    I ended things in Jan because I felt I was being taken for granted. I have been to counselling for my insecurities and I have tried to make amends. I am sincerely sorry and I genuinely believe things are different.
    I have hurt him a lot and the trust has been broken. He does struggle to trust women (from childhood)
    Is there anyway I can repair the damage? I care for him so much.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      March 24, 2018 at 5:20 pm

      Hi Megan,

      Why did you feel he’s taking you for granted?

  11. Shen

    March 3, 2018 at 2:46 pm

    Hey there. So my ex boyfriend blocked me on everything, and just completely shunned me. I actually have no problems with it, but the fact is that we see each other everyday at school since he’s my classmate. I don’t communicate with him though. So does no contact count here or it doesn’t? It’s so hard since he’s with his friends everyday, and we just see each other everyday but he keeps avoiding me. Does no contact really apply in my case? Does he even think about me or something? Does he miss me or what? After all, he’s got his manipulative friends to cheer him up and feed him with negativities and hatred towards me. A reply and help would be truly appreciated. Thanks a lot!

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      March 7, 2018 at 11:43 am

      Hi Shen,

      You can follow the advice on this one:
      EBR 009: The No Contact Rule If You Work With Your Ex

  12. Kt

    February 20, 2018 at 11:37 pm

    I already over stepped ! I broke up with him and immediately wanted him back ! I broke up with him for reasons that are real like needing to learn how to love myself and over come relationship anxiety but i miss him and had hoped we could talk and work it out! I called and texted and even went by his house ! He now says I’m harassing him and he hates me ! I wish i would have not contacted with him
    But now i blew it !

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 24, 2018 at 10:57 pm

  13. Bri

    February 20, 2018 at 8:52 pm

    My ex and I broke up almost a year ago. We had only been together for 4 months, but in those four months I had found the one. I knew after the second date, and after a month he had felt the same way. He broke up with me giving me the reason of “our personalities clash” and nothing more – when in reality our personalities meshed together perfectly. We had worked together and so we saw each other for months after the breakup till he got a new job. In those months he did things that made it obvious that he missed me. I tried no contact multiple times to only fail when it came time to get him back. Now he’s in a relationship with someone, he hates me and has called me his crazy ex to my friends, while in the same breath calling me his, and we were in the same bar one day and he had said it was like getting his teeth pulled just being there. I want him back but feel like he completely hates me.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 23, 2018 at 6:13 pm

      Hi Bri
      How many times have you done nc and for how long in each? How active are you in improving yourself and in posting? Why did you fail in building rapport?

  14. Bri

    February 20, 2018 at 7:56 pm

    My ex and I broke up almost a year ago. We had only been together for 4 months, but in those four months I had found the one. I knew after the second date, and after a month he had felt the same way. He broke up with me giving me the reason of “our personalities clash” and nothing more – when in reality our personalities meshed together perfectly. We had worked together and so we saw each other for months after the breakup till he got a new job. In those months he did things that made it obvious that he missed me. I tried no contact multiple times to only fail when it came time to get him back. Now he’s in a relationship with someone, he hates me and has called me his crazy ex to my friends, while in the same breath calling me his, and we were in the same bar one day and he had said it was like getting his teeth pulled just being there. I want him back but feel like he completely hates me.

  15. Cutiepatootie

    February 11, 2018 at 5:52 pm

    I stopped contact with my guy friend who I liked because I felt like we were basically a couple without the title and he wouldn’t commit and make it official. So I stopped contact hoping he would miss me and realize we should be together. He texted a lot for about a week then stopped. After a month, I texted him something funny like the no contact rule says. He didn’t reply. A week later I called him, I freaked out on him, asking how he just doesn’t seem to care anymore. He said he is just done, he doesn’t want to deal with it and never wants to talk to me again. I don’t know where this came from. How can he have texted incessantly for a week then just give up and say forget you? I feel like I screwed it all up doing no contact. But at the same time I just don’t get how he can not care about me anymore after only a month. We were so close.

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      February 15, 2018 at 6:11 pm

      Hi Cutiepatootie,
      Are you sleeping with him? If yes, then it’s not surprising he would act like that because in the first place, if he truly cared, you would be official.

  16. Lia Duignan

    November 13, 2017 at 12:36 am

    Hi team, i need help
    So me and my boyfriend of 3 and a half years broke up. I was the person who broke it off with him but then 2 days later i took it back nd he didn’t want me anymore. He said he needed to see what it’s like with out me !! Now it’s already been 6 wks nd It’s just been so messy.. we’d get together nd it’s fine then he would push me away. He said some horrible things to and even went on a date with someone else. I just do believe that it’s over for him!! He’s so hot nd cold all the time with me!!! He got really upset the fact that I ignored him to!! He’s just not making any sense I just end up pushing him further away from me, I don’t know wat to do I miss him so much nd love him more everyday even though I should hate him .. pls help

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      November 13, 2017 at 2:08 am

  17. Help..

    October 8, 2017 at 2:56 pm

    My situation is sooo complicated . I was seeing a guy for two years but didn’t really become serious for the last year . Long story short he wanted a break I become emotional for a week then we started to be good . But then the police randomly came to his house and said there was a domestic violence call reported on him . So he automatically assumed it was me since he broke up with me … He literally hates me now because he believes it was me I told him over and over it wasn’t me …

    I’m not sure what to do . I can tell when I speak to him he doesn’t fully believe it was me but all fingers point to me since I was upset and blew his phone up when he ended things.

    Any advice on what to do would help ? Thanks ..

    1. Help

      October 11, 2017 at 1:09 pm

      I tried to reach out yesterday night . I called and he answered and said quit calling me . I told him I was only calling about the situation and then I hung up on him …

      Why would he answer just to say that .
      Is there anything else I could do?

    2. EBR Team Member: Amor

      October 12, 2017 at 12:00 pm

      Probably because he wants you to move on.. and I think you should..

    3. Help

      October 9, 2017 at 3:34 am

      It was about six days ago . Only once before .

    4. EBR Team Member: Amor

      October 9, 2017 at 12:14 am

      When did that happen? Have you done nc? If yes, how many times?

  18. Jessi

    July 22, 2017 at 7:03 pm

    The same things happened to me 2 years ago when our relationship began. We really seen and liked,cared each other but when misunderstanding happen we got into small fight where we both anger at each other. From then he started hating me saying i don’t like you.. I don’t want to see your face and then. I seen him with other girl many times also. I even said sorry and also tried no contact formula also. He left to other country came to meet all his friends except me though I tried to talk to him. I went into depression and I’m still fighting. I’m so scared of relationships now and being afraid to get anger on someone. But I loved him so much. But I lost hope on him by just thinking his smile. Will I be happy on future can I make happy life future? Pls tell me

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      July 25, 2017 at 4:48 pm

      Hi Jessi,

      of course you can.. Happiness is your choice. Don’t hand it over to somebody else because that’s your life, it depends on your decisions.

  19. Muskan

    July 8, 2017 at 10:24 am

    just recently I broke up with my boyfriend,we spnd lot of time together,he is my first love and everything for me,ours relationship was to good evn in school all teachers know about tht we are in relationship, all students said made for each other ,I think about him always every minute ,I was wanting a2nd chance to solve the problem but he decided to breakup evn he doesn’t give any reason why he want to break up with me,i had sent him lot of msgs to convenience him,bt I also force him to continue the relationship otherwise I do sucide and all ,I know there is my mistake and I’m feeling guilty about this ,I was do this only because I don’t want let him go bt after doing this he starts hating.now he don’t evn want to talk me ,it’s hard it’s realize that I will never be with this boy again ,he is the boy who does not want to make me cry bt now he hates me because of my reasonso please please please give me some advice how I get him back because I don’t want to leave him in any condition

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      July 9, 2017 at 6:32 pm

      Hi Muskan,

      First, get professional help because you’re very emotional right now.. 2nd, check this one:
      Does Begging For Your Ex Back Even Work?

  20. mon

    June 26, 2017 at 12:07 pm

    hi! I’m 20.2yreas ago my boyfriend dumped me without any reason… we had such short relationship like 2 months..and in relationship we couldnot meet up that much….after breakup he asked for date but for some prob I can’t go with..then he stopped to talked to me..then for my few friend he started to think I’m slacking on him..which I have not.. so the he hated me n blacked me in social medias … it been 2 years I’m blocked my him… I still miss him .. I still I want him back.. I do love him…maybe he have forgotten me.. but I can’t sleep in nights for him..im in pain .. what should I do…

    1. EBR Team Member: Amor

      June 29, 2017 at 1:03 pm

      Mon,if you’re still blocked after two years, that means you need to move on

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