The Definitive Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back

8,582 thoughts on “The Complete Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back”

Krista

March 29, 2016 at 1:54 pm

Part 1:
I apologize for how long it is
Hello, my boyfriend and I just broke up. He broke up with me and we dated for over a year. The relationship was getting serious. Such as he was looking for a place for us to live together and talking about engagement. He found a job in another state and moved down there in February. and I am going to graduate in May. The plan was for me to join him and find a job down there.
He mentioned to his mother this past weekend about his plans with him and I, and she was thrown for a loop. She is a nice woman along with his family.
I was over there for Easter when my ex told his family about his plans. His mom sat down and had a serious conversation with us that I thought it went pretty well. His mom disagreed with what my ex wanted to do. She thought it was too soon. And my ex was totally against his mother saying to slow down. I listened to what she said and she had some good points and I was respectful.
Anyways I left after his mom and I spoke. And I thought Easter went well. However, the next day my ex breaks up with me.

His reasons:
He finds my family difficult (which it definitely is. My dad is incredibly rude and ignorant). And I don’t mind that he doesn’t like my family. I don’t like them either and have a long history of disagreement with them and not speaking to them for weeks.

He mentioned I have some rough edges. Such as lacking empathy sometimes and also being hotheaded. Which he does sometimes possess those two items also. And we have worked on it and for the past year it has greatly improved. (Communication!)
Another thing was we were moving too fast. Which I was not the one pushing it. It was actually him that mentioned engagement for a few months now.
All of those reasons listed above are easily fixable with communication and understanding. So I figured he was not telling me the whole truth. We set up a time yesterday to exchange items that we had such as clothes and each other’s house or house keys.
Heartbroken

March 29, 2016 at 1:49 pm

Hi again EBR team, my comment has been under moderation for a week now, there has been some changes in the past week. But I’m still unsure if I’m doing anything right/wrong at this point in time…

Heartbroken

March 31, 2016 at 2:12 pm

Hi Amor, I’ve actually sent an e-mail with the recent changes to Leia at the e-mail: [email protected] as she replied me there couple days ago, and am hoping for a response. Should I CC to support instead?
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 3, 2016 at 11:05 am

Oh, yeah I think it’s better if you email support instead.
EBR Team Member: Amor

March 31, 2016 at 8:37 am

Hi Heartbroken,

sorry for the late reply, what were the changes?

Emily

March 27, 2016 at 11:32 pm

we had been dating for 8 months and broke up a year ago because I lied to him about something in my past. he hated me for a while but now we’re friendly. I have already done no contact and now we have friendly brief text conversations when I initiate. problem is I can only meet up with him in July as I am away with school but I’ll be back home in July for a week and he has already agreed to hang out with me when I’m back in town. what do I do in the meantime. I don’t want to overwhelm him with texting as I believe our connection is best in person. after July I have three months of school a and then I’ll be back home for good in November. how do I go about recontacting if it is long distance for now and he likes me best in person? (my text message skills suck) please help. thank you.

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 3, 2016 at 4:01 am

Hi Emily,

The truth is it’s really hard if it’s long distance. You have to have time, money and a plan on when you will be together. I think it’s better to just stay friends for now until you get home. If it progresses, address those three factors so the relationship can have a chance.

Grace

March 27, 2016 at 8:38 am

Hi. Thank you for the reply. I started the no contact march 17. But then on march 18 he called and texted me several times and I refused to answer because I am in no contact. On the next day he called again and then I answered because I got really worried. He told me that he and her current girlfriend broke up. I asked him why he was telling me this and then he told me he just wanted me to know as a friend. Then I told him to stop contacting me for now because I’m still hurting and I needed time away from him and he agreed. Last march 23 I just found out that they got back together. Did I made the right choice of telling him to stop contacting me or not? I think I just blew me chancr of getting him back. Pls help me. What should I do?

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 3, 2016 at 3:38 am

Hi Grace,

for me it is, because it seems like he wants to make you a rebound. Even if you came first, it’s not nice to just jump from girl to another back and forth. It’s like he knows you will take him back easily.

Ashley

March 26, 2016 at 11:13 pm

I have been dating my boyfriend on and off since we were in middle school. Now we are in our 2nd year of college. He just broke up with me today because he said “it hurt being in a relationship with me” he said i would get mad when he wanted to hang with friends and that i didnt trust him. But i do. I am hurting so badly i really need help. Its to the poibt where i cant stop crying. I dont know what to do… This is the 3rd time he has broke up with me and he came back svery time. But i am scared that this time he is for real… When we talked today face to face, he said that he just wants time, but i cant even give him that… And its true it is so hard for me. I dont want to see him with any one else. He is my first love and i am his. We did everything together. This is extremely hard for me. So when i went to get out of his cae i said well alright have a good life i guess and he said ong i just said give me time it doesnt mean im gone forever and ill never see you again… What does that mean? I dont know what to do please. I can’t stand this pain anymore!! Why does he keep breaking up with me just to realize every time i am the one that he wants? Help please and thank you

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 3, 2016 at 2:44 am

Hi Ashley,

looks like you became clingy.. Are you doing nc now?

lw

March 26, 2016 at 2:18 pm

Hi i could do with some advice..
I was with my boyfriend for a year and a half and we went through a lot together, we moved in a bit too soon however and he felt trapped and I wasn’t helping the situation due to my anxiety. About a month ago out of the blue he came home after a night ut and said he didn’t want to be with me anymore. I didn’t see him until two days later where he said he feels confused and thinks we should take a step back somewhat. At the time I couldn’t see it but then I agreed, take a step back and start slowly as our lease was up on our home together I would move back home and he would live with a friend.

A week later after him being cold and no messages he agreed to meet up he said he doesn’t know where his head is at, he doesn’t know if he believes our relationship can work anymore due to my anxiety and his problems. He said he wanted some space/a break to figure out what he wants and for me to to do the same. He said he wants to see me happy again and go back to the confident person I was and he himself wants to clear his head. At the time i was devastated however now I can see it has done us the world of good.

I’ll admit i struggled with the no contact rule at first… i had to restart it a few times but its been over a week and i feel better already as I know i won’t do it again. Honestly though I feel like he has forgotten about me, he’s been going out till god know whats time and said he’s happier as he doesn’t have to worry about hurting my feelings. Its my birthday next week and honestly i don’t think i will even get a happy birthday from him. I also found out he’s been messaging girls and going on tinder which i know is only to boost his ego because he doesn’t want a relationship I think he just wants to enjoy being on his own for a bit.

When he broke up with me said if its meant to be then it will as we both know we have a connection and there is a lot of chemistry and passion there however he doesn’t know if thats enough anymore.I am focusing on myself now though and going to the gym, enjoying myself, and I’m getting back to the happy me however I still feel like he is missing..

I just wanted to put my thoughts down and share them with you as neither of us want anyone else but he deleted me off face book and blocked me off instagram etc.. theres no bad feelings its like he’s just forgotton about me and i feel like the last year and a half meant nothing to him. I get on so well with all of his family and friends and they are as surprised as me with his decision. Although he said he made that decision when he was confused and he doesn’t know what to do but since has been so cold with me, won’t talk to me or about me to anyone of his friends or family.
I will carry on with the NC rule as i’m only 7 days through it after texting him last week to no reply… wish me luck! x
Kai

March 26, 2016 at 7:27 am

If I may ask, is there anyway to contact you guys via email? It’s just a bit of a long and personal situation to post in the comment section. s:

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 2, 2016 at 2:50 pm

Hi Kai,

yes, you can email us at support@exboyfriendrecovery and our team member Leia will answer you.

Grace

March 26, 2016 at 2:30 am

I commented before but I dont know where it is now. Anyways here it is again.

Hi good day. Me and my ex boyfriend were together for 7 months and broke up 10 months ago because of miscommunucation and misunderstandings. He then found a new girl 3 months later and they are still together. We havent talked since the break up until last february 28. When we chatted it was great and we had fun until I told him I havent move on from and told him that I want him back. Despite his best efforts to push me away and telling me to find someone better I cant help bu expect he still have feelings for me because of his actions. Like when I stayed home and didnt go to school, he called me saying he will not go to school also and talked with me for hours just to make me feel better. And when that time he learned I was drunk with friends he called and picked me up. We talked and he told me that he still have feelings for me but it is dormant. He said he dont want his feelings for me to wake up because he doesnt want to feel the pain he felt before. After that talk he keeps pushing me away and now ignoring my texts but he still likes my facebook statuses. I dont know what to do. Did I just blow my chance of getting him back? I think I made the big no-nos. Do I stilk have a chance of getting him back? Does the no contact rule still applies for my situation? Do you think he's in a rebound relationship? We're catholics and came from conservative country so premarital sex is frowned upon so we havent had sex. But he told me that they already had sex with her new girl for a long time now.

Grace

March 27, 2016 at 8:43 am

Hi. Thank you for the reply. I started the no contact march 17. But then on march 18 he called and texted me several times and I refused to answer because I am in no contact. On the next day he called again and then I answered because I got really worried. He told me that he and her current girlfriend broke up. I asked him why he was telling me this and then he told me he just wanted me to know as a friend. Then I told him to stop contacting me for now because I’m still hurting and I needed time away from him and he agreed. Last march 23 I just found out that they got back together. Did I made the right choice of telling him to stop contacting me or not? I think I just blew me chancr of getting him back. Pls help me. What should I do?
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 3, 2016 at 3:38 am

Hi Grace,

for me it is, because it seems like he wants to make you a rebound. Even if you came first, it’s not nice to just jump from girl to another back and forth. It’s like he knows you will take him back easily.
Jennifer Seiter

March 26, 2016 at 4:25 am

I think you still have a chance. Go into no contact for 21 days and use facebook to your advantage. He still likes you so that’s a big deal. Put up a status about going to see the new batman VS superman movie. It’s a guys movie so he won’t be sure if your going with girls or a guy. Let him feel the jealously a little bit. Put the status like this, “Can’t wait to see Batman VS Superman this weekend.”

You may have to wait until he brakes up with his current girlfriend for him to actually commit to you though. Sometimes it becomes a waiting game.

jennifer

March 25, 2016 at 3:24 pm

Hello EBR Team
I’ve been reading the articles on this side for a long time now and have commented on a few. First, I want to thank you for your great advices. They helped me feeling better and made me stop being so sensitive about my ex boyfriends actions. I also noticed that my ex slowly develops interest in me again (or he finds out that he still likes me. We don’t know). Thus I am thinking about buying Ex Boyfriend Recovery Pro and/or the Texting Bible.
But there is a problem.

I live in germany and I am still in High School. Soon I will finish my last year and start going to an university which will be hopefully my dream university that is just an hour away. Thus I will continue to live with my parents and maybe I won’t have to work (studying medicine is pretty hard and I am also engaged into many other things so it will be a great relief if I won’t have to 😉 )
So now I don’t have -and maybe won’t have one anytime soon- a credit card. Is there another way how I could buy your book? Maybe through Google Play Books?
Thank you for your answers 🙂

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 31, 2016 at 11:17 am

HI Jennifer,

I’m sorrry for the late reply I’ll check on Chris if there are any other way than credit card. You can try to reply the next day with the cliffhanger text and do what you used to do. I hope everything goes well 🙂

Christina

March 25, 2016 at 11:10 am

Hi Amor,

I am trying to make my story short. So here’s the deal. I was with my ex for 7 years, when we suddenly broke up because he met someone else. I was devasted and wanted him back. After three weeks he came crawling back. My heart was so broken, but I had also met another guy. I started to hang out with my ex, while he was still on going with his new girlfriend. I still dated my new man as well, but I just needed time and also I wanted him to fight a little for my love again. We went on for 9 months and I finally found myself ready to go all in with my ex. I told him and he said he was ready as well. When the day came, where he was suppose to move back in and leave his girlfriend, he said he couldn’t. He was beginning to have feelings for her as well. I cried. This was back in november. During those 9 months there were many problems. I ended everything with my “boyfriend” and told my ex. He was happy about me not seeing him anymore. One night at a christmas party my ex were suppose to pick me up, but I ended up going to my “boyfriends” house instead, even though I told my ex, I wasn’t with him anymore. I lied and he got so upset. So when I finally ended everything with my “boyfriend” in november, my ex needed me to fight for him. So I did. And now we are here. It’s March, more than a year ago we split. He is still with his girlfriend and me at the same time. She does not know everything. I still want him back, badly. I am not seeing anyone now and I have been fighting for him for 5 months now. We have several times tried to end contact, but he just can’t leave me alone and I have a hard time not replying. The situation is a bit different now. I wish I just took him back, back then. But my heart just wasn’t ready. What do you think I should do, to get him back? Not talk to him for 30 days as well? He is the love of my life and even though our relationship has been one big mess, I feel like I can’t live my life without him. He still has many feelings for me, but also towards her. Please help me, what to do?

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 2, 2016 at 1:00 pm

Hi Christina,

It’s going to hurt but the best choice is actually to walk away. He has to make a decision because as long as you’re there, he doesn’t have the need to break up with her.. He sees you’re just there waiting. Put more importance for yourself so others will do too. He’s being unfair to both of you women.. Especially for the other girl because she doesn’t know anything. Be ready to walk away when somebody doesn’t treat you well, because in that way the right person will come.

Nita

March 25, 2016 at 6:22 am

Hello! I’ve been following this thread for about a week now and I wanted a little more advice. Me and my ex broke up on March 11th and it has been a rough time for me (I’m not sure about him) and I want him back. I made the mistake of crying to him basically about 2 times within the next 5 days about him giving me another chance and it didn’t work. He told me that he didn’t like the situation so he removed himself and that he still loves me and wanted to eventually be friends because he knew it wouldn’t happen right away but I honestly feel like I can’t just be his friend. He broke up with me at the heat of the moment and he’s really stubborn. I’ve been doing the nc successfully for 7 days and I feel good about myself but I’m scared that I will lose all chances by the end of the period. The last time I spoke to him he told me that I was smothering him with a lot of emotions and he needed some space, that he would like to have updates and small talk with me here and there but not everyday. He hasn’t contacted me since then and I’m worried…. We only dated for 6 months and we’re long distance, what do you think is best to do in this situation?

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 2, 2016 at 12:40 pm

Hi Nita,

Sorry for the late reply.. It looks like you became clingy.. If you’re active in posting in social media, he will see the improvements.. It’s better if you do 30 days

LB

March 23, 2016 at 4:05 pm

My situation is complicated but here is the jest of it. My ex and I have known each other for about 10 years. We lived together for about 5 years but then moved into separate homes because of personal reasons. We were always in touch and a part of each others lives. Seeing each other etc…Last spring we were still seeing each other but he checked into a rehab for personal issues and we did not speak to each other for about 8-9 months. In Feb 2016 we spoke and saw each other and it was really great. We were intimate rather quickly and spoke for about a month. In a matter of a four day period we went from conversation and fun texting to he was blowing me off. Come to find out he began “having something going on with someone else”. I do not believe she was on the scene when we first got back into contact. I will admit that I came on strong with expressing feelings and talking to him about the time we didnt speak. We have always been friends and then he said he “wasnt sure we could be JUST friends”. Our last conversation was one where he did not seem like even he knew what he wanted. I asked if h never wanted to speak to me again/see me again…response was ” I didnt say that”. So that was 3/8 ( I am doing the 30 day no contact plan here) and I just left things with him as the ball was in his court since he didnt seem to have a clue what to say or do. I have not contacted him in any manner but I do see on FB that this new girl is tagging him when they go out to dinner but nothing looks serious. I feel she is a complete rebound but my question is. Given our history etc…I would LOVE to get him back but could it be too late? Thank you for your reply 🙂

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 1, 2016 at 1:24 pm

HI LB,

I don’t think it’s too late. Be active in no contact and post it. So, he will see that you can have a life of your own too and miss you.

Teddy

March 23, 2016 at 11:31 am

Hello,

So my boyfriend of four years (in the up comming two month) broke up with me. One day we started talking about moving together and the few following that, we calculated out the: mortgage, location, utility, and monthly expenses with estimation and lee way as well as how much we needed to borrow to down payment and own a house on a spread sheet he suggests and got me pumped up. Then I told him to go on the trip with his club toget some relax time for the weekend. On Sunday he messaged me that he needed sometimes to think away from me. Ofcourse me being shocked and mad I pushed him and myself to the limit and let’s just say he broke up with me because of the small problems we always had but never able to get it out. He knows that if we get back together we could have worked all of the out ( for the week following our breakup we stayed up all night and talked and he was able to tell me things he never did. He told me he don’t think I’m right for him and heighten all these problem every couple have. (Ours was communication and talks ) I also Admit it was my fault I did not have a lot of in the pass few months since I’ve been so stress with being senior in college, work, and having to deal with people who were annoying. So by the end of the day I just want to cuddle and feel love making him feeling disconnected from me and he has also been busy with his thing. I believe that he’s very deceptive of our relationships now because he’s trying to move on and such and me still angry and shocked about what he does and al I pushed him to broke up with me. He and I admit that we were happy when we are together. We never have a major problem breaking up like this. Yes we have small argument and quarrel like many couple but at the end of the day we would kiss and apologize to each other and snuggle happily in arms sleeping. And I’ve been bothering him, I did have him a few day no contact but I missed him and called and reason and told him he owe us a try again blah blah. It’s been a week and I’m still emotional and upset and sad. Even though I went on trip with tons of people and did plenty of things but in the end of the day I missed him and I write him these unsend text on phones note app. Do you think that is helpful and do you think these guides could apply to me if I try the nc thing, do we have a chance?? Because I’m slightly skeptical but you know why I am here. I scanned the page I think it’s reasonable and it’s never bad to have some time for self improvement. I’m 25, and the last four years were my happiest year I’ve had than in any of my others. We were always honest to each other and once in a while we talked about how compliment each and as well things we have in common. He was the one who got me pumped up more about our future when I’m usually the one avoiding that and now he’s just backing out. I’m sorry for the bad grammar and long post its late and I feel unstable. Right now I’m very lost and I made mistake of pushing supper hard and kept on contacting him. Now I’m not sure what to do and I’m looking for something reasonable to hold on to. And if these actually end up working out after the 30 days no contact thing and guides for slowly getting back work I will definitely buy the book even if I already got back together. It’ll be my way of supporting you guys and my gratitude.

I hope you will be able to reply and thank you for sparing sometimes and reading this in advance.

EBR Team Member: Amor

April 1, 2016 at 12:18 pm

Hi Teddy,

Sorry for the late reply. Did you reply to him? If he wants to talk again you can reply. As long it’s a message of sincerity that he really wants to work things out, that’s ok to break nc.
Teddy

March 23, 2016 at 7:00 pm

He was the more clingy one in our relationship that’s is why I’m so shocked and upset about this.

Heartbroken & Lost

March 22, 2016 at 12:05 pm

Hi Chris & team,

I’m unsure what category or method to use for my situation. Would mean a lot if you would guide me through which methods to use from your book for my situation…

I have been dating my guy for about 1/2 a year before he broke it off with me about 10 days ago. We weren’t officially in a relationship for the period of time, but we been sort of in an underground relationship (but both our families knew we were together, we even go out with each other’s families).

During this period, he would try to hide the fact that we were dating from people (probably the fear of commitment), and it caused some major issues between us. He was still on dating apps but I never seen him speak to anyone on it, and at times when he speaks to someone of the opposite gender, he would remove the chat so I wouldn’t see it when he meets me. I was constantly upset and paranoid, and didn’t know how to make him take the initiative to want to commit on his own. Now that I have thought through it, I may have tried to guilt him too often. We fought a lot, and had many arguments throughout this dating period.

On the 5th month of our dating, I told him that I can’t be waiting forever, and threw him the ultimatum. With that, he said he was ready for a relationship, and said all the things I wanted to hear “I’m not gonna waste your tears you’ve shed, I’ll change, I’ll improve, etc.”. He started to open up about our relationship to friends, and made known that he’s already seeing someone, and also started thinking for me more. I was really happy, I was overjoyed. But I still distrusted him. I made the worse mistake by hacking into his messaging app, and was later found out while he was out of town on a holiday. We also had a lot of arguments and I was always paranoid during his trip.

When he touched down, he dropped the bomb on me. “I don’t think this is working out.” He broke up with me the moment he landed, and didn’t wish to see me or talk about it, but he offered that we could still talk normally. I did what most people would do, I cried and begged for him back; to give it another shot. I did this for the entire week after he broke up with me. And just last weekend, I had too much to drink and went over to his place. He was furious but did not chase me out. I then tried to get close to him, and we had sex. I know that it’s not a good idea from what I’ve read on your website, but I only came across your site after all these has happened.

The next day when we woke up, I tried to talk to him again, I told him I needed answers, and asked whether he still loved me or would try again. He said he just wants his freedom and that he can’t be in a relationship now (he is in the army. FYI in our country, all men are required to serve the nation for 2 years), and that we CAN sit down and talk over it, (whether we can start over again or just discuss what went wrong) when he completes his national service (which will end in 3 months time). I then asked if he would still love me in 3 months time, and he said yes. I’m not sure what to think of this.

He sent me home after that, and I told him sadly that I’m not sure when I’ll see him again. He responded with “I can see you this weekend when i’m back from camp.” That was 2 days ago, he hasn’t mentioned anything about wanting to meet up. We’re still texting as per normal now, but I’ve been a little cold with my replies since yesterday.

I’m not sure what my next move should be. Now I don’t know what to do or say to him, or if I should even continue having the normal conversations he offered. How can I get him to think of wanting to try again or get back together?

Please help!

Heartbroken

March 31, 2016 at 2:30 pm

We spoke on 24mar and I brought up the relationship issue again. We broke into a small fight because he didn’t want to talk about it, but after a while he cooled down, but has been insistent to not discuss getting back together. I got a small pregnancy scare earlier last week so I didn’t know how to react, and therefore brought up the relationship issue again, and told him the news (I’ve now confirmed that it was definitely just a scare). But after bringing this situation up, he was suddenly more receptive and concerned. He suggested we meet the next day to talk over things, but I ended up visiting his place that night and we fell asleep instead.
When we woke up the next day, we did talk over some matters, and he said again that he does still love me but he cannot handle/deal with a relationship now. And reason why he doesn’t wanna assure me that we will come back to it again or try again when he’s out of army, is because he doesn’t wanna make empty promises and give me false hopes. We both made our own plans that evening (he was going to the club with his pals, and I was going to the same place with an old friend), so we parted after the talk (which didn’t go anywhere as he was still insistent on holding onto his singlehood).
We bumped into each other in the club, but we tried to keep it casual, with his friends around I didn’t wanna seem uncomfortable. I later bumped into an old male friend from ages ago, and he tried to hit on me the entire night. My ex caught a glimpse of it, and when I hitched a ride from my ex to home (he was sending another friend that stays pretty close to me home), he questioned me about it over text that night “Were you dancing with another guy?” I guess he got jealous. I didn’t respond at that point of time, but he asked me over text again the next morning, which I told him bluntly that “yes I was with a guy last night”, but didn’t elaborate on it. He then proceeded to compliment me on how hot I looked last night, and asked again “Did you let anyone touch you yesterday?”, which I just replied with a “I’m no longer your girl why do you ask such questions? Point is, do you even trust me?” He just responded with a “Never mind, I trust you.”
Later in the evening, he asked if I’d like to meet him the next morning before he had to return back to camp. But hearing that he was feeling extremely ill, I headed to his place that night to meet him instead. He started asking me about my night at the club again, and I just told him that the guy I was with was an old friend. He also came across my phone with numerous chats with guys on my WhatsApp (it popped up on my home screen). He seemed truly jealous. While I was at his place, I asked him if he still sees us being tgt, or if he still wanted to be with me, but all he said was to give him some time.
Now before he went off the radar on 27mar (he was not allowed to carry a phone), I asked if he had anything to say to me. All he said was “Don’t anyhow while I’m away” (which I guess translates to “don’t go messing around with other guys while I’m not around”) He did however, sneaked his cell phone and texted me whenever he could come online. I recently accidentally blocked him on a social media platform and unblocked immediately, but now we’re no longer following each other on it, and both our profiles are private. He hasn’t notice till now. He’s gonna have access to his phone later tonight. What should I do?
EBR Team Member: Amor

April 3, 2016 at 11:40 am

Hi Sorry for the late reply..did you talk again?
EBR Team Member: Amor

March 31, 2016 at 8:37 am

Hi Heartbroken,

sorry for the late reply, what were the changes?

sam

March 22, 2016 at 8:42 am

I have said that to him recently about a month ago trying to do the NC it lasted for 2 weeks he messaged and I broke the NC. Mentioning breaking the NC so many times before that. I had said to him after that we will be friends if not anything else Do you think I should leave it to that? if he messages just be there as a friend?

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 31, 2016 at 5:44 am

if he replies that means you’re just going to start as friends but work your way to build attraction through text and calls, that will lead to dates, but if it still doesn’t progress, then you have to decide whether to just stay friends and see in the long run or move on.

jen

March 22, 2016 at 2:45 am

hi amor, my boyfriend and i broke up last night, he said that he is tired of me and he do not want to be with me anymore, he said that he lost the spark. we also broke up 2 yrs ago and i managed to get him back. but last night it happened again. he said he do not love me anymore and he can not stay with the relationship which has many fights. but the fights just occurred recently. we were happy, or its just what i think. we are living together and he is planning to move out of the house soon. our relationship is more than 7 yrs that is why i am hanging on to him. i want him back so badly. we have so many plans for our future and i cant believe that what happened 2 yrs ago is happening again. he even said that we cant be separated now that we are 7 yrs together. please help me. is it true that he does not love me anymore?is it possible for me to get him back again?

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 28, 2016 at 2:24 pm

Hi Jen,

It may be true that the spark is gone because it can also mean there’s no variety anymore and it has become boring. But if it so sudden, and it was only one fight, is there any other reason he may be doing this? Does he have new activities that has lead him to compare the relationship to it?

sam

March 21, 2016 at 1:06 pm

hi, I left a comment but don’t know where it has disappear too!! for me to do the NC could you tell me if you speak to your ex through whatsapp what should i do? i dont want to block me as i have done so many times in the past if I don’t reply back to him he will think I am ignoring him as two ticks will be shown that it has delivered to me also aftr the NC if he asks where have I been and why have I been ignoring his messages or calls what do I say?

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 22, 2016 at 5:31 am

Hi Sam,

I’lk just paste my reply from your previos comment okay?

here it is..
nope don’t block him…

you can message him and if he doesn’t reply..send a last message that you understand why he’s not replying annd that you’re going to take time for yiurself and for him too.. and then do nc.. at least that way he already know why you’re not messaging but he won’t know until when..

if he replies continue the convo..but if after nc he still doesn’t reply or engage..that means it’s better to move on

Amanda

March 19, 2016 at 11:53 pm

Need my ex boyfriend back fast

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 20, 2016 at 9:04 am

Hi Amanda,

what’s your story? and why do you need him back fast?

cat

March 19, 2016 at 7:44 pm

Hi ex boyfriend recovery!
I’m going to try my best to give you a shortened version of my situation. Basically I am 17 years old and my boyfriend and I are both juniors in high school. We had been dating for about a year and a half and everything was literally perfect. Yeah we had some fights and whatnot but what relationship doesn’t. We were serious too we were looking at colleges together and we were planning on going on vacation together this summer. He broke up with me March 5th and I am 14 days into no contact. When he broke up with me he gave me a bunch of reasons such as I always pick fights with him (which I did and he hates fighting with me) and then he told me he’s extremely stressed and tired all the time then he told me he doesn’t think he loves me anymore. He also told me he’d been talking to a girl but she’s not the reason he’s breaking up with me (which I don’t believe). Everything was completely fine before she came into the picture. We only see each other every weekend because we don’t go to the same school. I saw him Sunday and everything was normal and then Thursday he broke up with me. He said he had been talking to this girl since the Saturday before. I’m kinda confused on what to do because I’m not at all sure if the reason he broke up with me is the girl or if it’s that he’s extremely stressed or confused. His mom has been contacting me and my mom she told me she missed me and stuff. My ex has also been liking all of my Instagram posts and even a tweet. He hasn’t deleted anything off his Instagram regarding our pictures together and I’m still in his profile picture. I recently found out that he is liking a whole bunch of this other girls tweets (like a bunch of them). I don’t know what to do or think I need some kind of direction I miss him so much. Please help me

Cat

March 20, 2016 at 3:25 pm

Hi Amor,
Yes I am trying to be pro active. I’ve been spending a lot of time with my friends and I’ve been posting a lot on snapchat and Instagram. He’s been seeing all my snapchat stories and he’s been liking all my Instagram pictures. What does it mean if he’s liking them? He hasn’t taken down any of his Instagram pictures and he also hasn’t removed his profile picture with me in it. I may have gotten a little curious and stalked his Twitter and i saw that he favorited a whole bunch of this girls tweets. I have read almost all the articles on this site yet I’m still scared that me not talking to him is causing him to get closer to this girl and forget about me. Is that possible? I don’t understand why this is happening the guy I know would never do this to me. She’s one of those really provocative girls too. He’s gotta realize sooner or later that he had it so good with me and he’s making a huge mistake right? I just can’t believe this is happening I never saw it coming everything was perfect. We have our proms coming up in late April and early May. Is there even a chance I could get him back? Please help me I’m so scared to lose him
EBR Team Member: Amor

March 21, 2016 at 7:42 am

It’s ok to be scared but the truth is, when the guy knows you’re ok to lose him and you have your own life, that’s when they put they value more on the relationship because they see it as a challenge.. and if he sees you’re improvement during no contact, there’s a greater chance he’ll miss you more
EBR Team Member: Amor

March 20, 2016 at 8:30 am

Hi Cat,

it looks it’s because of the girl.. Are you being pro active during no contact?

Taylor

March 18, 2016 at 2:59 pm

Hi Amor & Chris
My gay boyfriend broke up with me about 2 weeks ago, and for the 1st time, something truly brought me to my knees, as I didn’t see this coming! In fact, it was on our 4th month anniversary of being together. Can I just quickly say this is the 2nd time. And as you probably imagine, it’s the usual tell tale “its me, its not you”.
He told me, he wanted more in the relationship and he feels he’s not getting enough, perhaps he doesn’t feel the usual butterflies in his tummy like he used to when we first me and something didn’t quite add up and he has mixed feelings. The first time we broke up he feels I don’t do enough, e.g. surprise him and sweep him off his feet like I used to. He feels the relationship has gone boring and I’m not in-charge like I used to. Basically, he feels like since I’ve already won him I had become complacent. I took all these on board and started being proactive, (I’m usually an introvert and he an extrovert) I decided to do a lot of improvement and go out more, turns out that all the effort about “going out” has been done by him, say for example on valentine’s day, he has made plans way early in January and suggested that I take the day before and after off, basically he was in charge of anything social and I was in charge in other ways you could imagine.
When we broke up, he was all sobbing and getting emotional, so much kisses and cuddles and again reiterated I’m a great guy but it feels unfair to me having to be with someone who isn’t sure about them. So he had to walk away! Ever since he calls me everyday and texts me with updates about his days and even tell me to tell him sweet words, but all these tear me apart that he’s not mine anymore and he still wants my heart and attention. I remember him saying he might regret this decision but he needs to make it for now to know how he feels. The last time we broke up, he couldn’t handle the breakup and we got back the next day, but it seems like this decision he’s made is a bit firmer than I would have imagined.

I made the usual mistakes of telling him nice things and letting him know how much I loved him and doing all things to convince him, but turns out this time he’s made up his mind. He got drunk last week and dialled my number and was telling me how much he misses me, but as he was saying it, it felt like a part of me is being slowly ripped apart. 2 days ago we met at the gym which we signed up for together on the same day before we broke up as that was our new month goal to push ourselves to where we were physically when we met each other. I pretended that I was happy seeing him, actually a part of me was happy and the other part wasn’t. I was about to leave but I then decided to stay a bit longer just so we could go home together (we don’t live together, but a few miles apart) but just at the point where I reached the 30 day no contact part on your website, its like a switch clicked in my head and I told him I needed to leave. His kind of conversations suggested he wanted me to stay but I ignored that. Surprisingly he also said he doesn’t want to stay long again and wants to leave, but before he could come out of the shower I had left. I texted him to let him know if he got home safe and he replied yes, with a “sweet dreams” text which I never replied and haven’t replied to since then. I’m fresh into my NC period and I have taken or learnt a lot from your advices so far, I really appreciate it, but you know what it can be like, its never enough. What do I do next!
Phewww! Writing this is like therapy—I feel 10 tonnes lighter!

EBR Team Member: Amor

March 19, 2016 at 3:14 pm

Hi Taylor,

I’m happy wrting it made you feel better! I know this is going to be hard at first but make this nc fun and memorable for you.. I think it’s easy to be friendly with him again after nc,but for now.. Try out things you haven’t done before, being introvert doesn’t mean you have to inexperienced right? Enjoy life.. It doesn’t have to be outside always or with a lot of people.. Redecorate your room, Walk in the park, sit and enjoy the moment, just be active and indulge yourself in with anything that makes you feel good

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